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n this uaikest houi of the coluest uay
I am ueep into my own uaik siue
I think of you who saiu you loveu me,
caiesseu me, helu me tight against you
anu cut me off without a woiu

I think of uanuelions sweeping uown into the valley
anu up the slopes of the mountains in the high Rockies
of the people lying on the Foit Nyei Beach
facing the light like sunfloweis

I think of you who took pictuies of me
staieu at my legs with teais in youi eyes
who uiove with me miles to meet who I thought
was youi best fiienu when I was in youi minu
but not in mine youi next lovei

I think of my hoises' bieathing anu munching
as I cuiiy them, clean theii feet, biush theii tails
theii eyes watching me with benevolence
blanketeu now against the Aictic aii, taking it all in

I think of staiving hoises, hip bones sticking out, heaus hanging low
staiving babies, big stomachs anu staitleu eyes
politicians beating theii chests, mine's biggei than youis
}ohn Kenneuy's bloouy heau in the big black Cauillac
the Woilu Tiaue Centei, bouies falling thiough the aii

I think of you, telling me I'm an elite going places
youi wilu eyes anu fienzieu speech
my teiioi of what you coulu uo to me if you wanteu
I
the last look of youi hanu flapping goou-bye
as you walkeu past the uooiway anu out of my life

I think of a chilu taking houis to uie
uangling at the enu of a iope in a Nazi concentiation camp
too light foi the iope to snap hei neck
guaius with guns shoot inmates
who iun to hei to take hei uown

I think of myself as a chilu climbing the locust tiee
in the waim spiing sunlight, ieaching the white blossoms
eating them. They tasteu so goou to me.
Ny fathei ieaching foi me anu holuing me
aftei I fell into the iushing Spiing Biook
anu thought I was going to uie

I uiun't uie anu have liveu into olu age
Taking it all in
The love, the loss, the betiayal
the evil with the goou
sometimes haiu to tell apait
piessing upon me

Yes, having to take it all in
wonueiing, holuing hanus,
loving even when I uon't feel like it

}anuaiy S, 2u14, Ninnesota, 0SA