U ofW

" HELIOG
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Inside: Whafs In Store"
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~ .. The New POETS Pub
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, Upcoming EngSoc Events
Federation HaD Revisited
Masthead
Vol. 2 No.1
Dedicated to Promote Participation and Comradery,
the Heliograph is a non-profit publication, produced
by Eng Soc B. All submissions and letters to the Editor
are welcome, and should be given to Maria in the Eng
Soc office located in Carl Pollock Hall. The last day of
submission for Heliograph II is May 29, 1984. No part
of this publication may be reprinted without the
written consent of the editor.
Editor Chris Bogdanow
Advertising John Occhipinti
885-1211 ext. 2323
Contributors
& Layout
(fOOD,FOOO
gOOD 'D1lZJiX
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Rob Lee
Dianne Myerson
Joe Corriea
Richard Drd ul
Jessica Armstrong
Maria Akot
Scott Sorli
Peter Vermes
Zeemon
Denis Van Decker
Rob Lee
Ross Tilcot
Frank
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lJt!,-Xlv.ry on ca'n;-iUS

onen //:JO .. 2:
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I 7/ll.l."5ai
,hone- 886-0440
XJf{(j SiREET }(1JRTJl
w)'1ERlOO, OJ(T.IO
l:tCEJISED BY'tKE l.l.'B.O.
Editorial
What is a:
We, the edirar and writers here at Helio-
graph have I'vorked hard ill {he past J
mOlllhs to bring you back onto campus
in style; well informed of what has taken
place while you were gone, and what to
prepare yourself/or in the new semester.
The Heliograph took on a format
change from the regular" Demi- Tab" to
(he Tabloid so that this publicalion
could make it OUi to you in lime.
As you can see by the cover (or did you
even notice) the Heliograph is still alive
and kicking, but it has a new flavour.
The Heliograph, "Dedicated to Promote
Participation and Comradery" in the
Engineering events, is a means of com-
municating to the Waterloo Campus
that there is more to us than the 3 catego-
rized stereotypes listed in 'The Molding
of the Male Engineer". (For those who
don't know the 3 categories, ask Mike
Urlocker).
Nter a very tough tenn of continuous
beating from various University Facul-
ties and the Iron Warrior. there grew a
need to restore the bruised reputation of
Waterloo's finest: The Engineer. On the
exterior, some of us come-off as rather
crude and unsophisticated (just ask Uni-
versity of Western Ontario or Queen's),
?

but deep down inside there is a certain
artistic quality in all of us.
The Heliograph is an open forum
publication for any student to express
their creativity. Be it a poem, short story,
an informative article, or a stab at our
sociological make-up, the Heliograph is
here to provide that outlet - a means of
expression.
But not only for expression, the Helio-
graph will provide updated reports on all
Eng Soc "B" goings on. To participate in
some of the Eng Soc events can help
bring about that needed break from the
pounding of continuous studying; and
there is something for alL
Here is your chance to show Waterloo
that our welJ disciplined minds can be
used in all facets of social behaviour. Go
draw a comic, write a poem or a hate
!etter to me (I can take it), and if writing
lS ,not your style, go swing a racquet,
dnnk a beer, kick a ball, or Denis (he can
take it), but most of aU - PARTICI-
PATE.
. The Heliograph is here for you to be
mformed and for you to inform others.
Don't just read about it - be a part of it.
Cheers.
Chris Bogdanow
Forthcoming feature article:
Allison Tom
2 May 1984
Rebirth of Carl Pollock
This article is to inform Eng Soc "B" Naturally, being engineers, we have
students of the proposed "Engineering developed an ingeni('us solution to this
Society Space Expansion" (E.S.S.E.) problem. The solution to the problem
project. For those who have already was presented as a reallocation of the
heard rumours about the project, this existing space.
article will serve as a status report on the This can be easily accomplished (ie. at
project. minimal cost relative to the other alter-
In the past 3 to 4 months, Denis Van natives) by enclosing the idle open
Decker and myself have ' been busy lounge behind the orifice and making it a
reviewing plans of the CPH building and licensable lounge. This would serve as
making additional plans in an attempt to POETS Pub on Thursday and Friday
increase Eng Soc's operating space. This afternoons and could be used as study
included analysis of architectural, finan- space for the remainder of the week.
cial and political aspects of such a pro- This would allow the office to be moved
ject. There were many a late night into the present POETS lounge, increas-
reviewing all possible alternatives. ing its area by 152%.
An architectural student prepared Subsequently, the present office would
sketches of the proposed project. The be converted into the C&D by adding an
result of this work was a 36-page report additional doorway. This would increase
outlining the proposal. It was used as the the operating area of the C&D by 70%.
prospectus for sponsors of the project. It would also allow for a second access to
The report outlines the space shortage be incorporated through the enclosed
problem U W is experiencing (ie. "The lounge. This means an opening in
worst shortage of space of aU Ontario the rear wall of the p,resent office. In the
universities" as quoted by Dr. Wright). future this'would mean the possibility of
In particular the report mentions UW is .. .. _iaxinB with. . .at
deficient in its student recreational hour.
space. The present C&D would be used for
The report describes in detail the the garbage work presently carried out
space problems Eng Soc has accumu- in the workshop. The open space outside
lated over the years. To list them briefly, the C&D would allow for additional
they are: open lounge area.
i) Small office in which photocopier In the recent months we have received
and recently-acquired computer are approval from the following: Dr. Bill
kept. Lennox, Dean of Engineering; Mr. Jon
ii) Congested C&D line at peak hours Dellandrea, WATFUND Director; Dr.
of the day. Doug Wright, President of UW; and
iii) An atrocious workshop. Director of Plant Operations and
iv) And, of course, the ever popular, but Planning.
small, POETS Pub.
ENGSOC presents
Victoria weekend movies
double feature
SliT, SUN, MON PHY$. '4-S
7PM
OTHERS $2
At present we have the go ahead for
Phase I and 2 of the project which
involves closing off the open lounge and
moving the office and C&D. The 'C two
pha es will be funded by a capital expell-
diture allotment of $10,000 from both
Eng Soc A & B. As wcll, we are in the
process offinali7.inga loan from the Pcd-
eration of Students. similar to the loan
made to Math Soc for their C& D
expansion.
The remaining pha es (3 through 7)
are additional renovations to the CPH
lounge which will he examined at later
date with Or. Wri )hC Thl.!sc phases will
be funded by corpomte donations via
WA rFU N D. 1\ finul report outlines the
recommendations necessary for the
completion of this
Construction for Phases I and 2 of the
project may start as early as the begin-
ning of JUlle 1984.
Joe Correia
E.S.s.E. Director
NIGHT SHIFT

/!,. Henry Winkler, SheUy Long
lJ Mlcheal Keaton
&
CADDYSHACK
BiU Murray, Chevy Chase M
Rodney Dangerfield y
BELlO
Federation Hall Revisited
The continuing saga of Fed Hall has lender, but we're still gelling basically the
been as you see by the building wc voted for. The revised Fed
construction underway beside Village I. Hall has a capacity of 650 people
Many Changes have been instituted in (unchanged) on three levels, each with a
the building since the disastrous first bar. The largest level is the main hall
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with a 1400 s(j. fl. dance floor where
most of the action will take place. For
those of a Jess boisterous nature there is a
furnished lounge area for conversation
and relaxation, on a level about two feet
higher than the dance floor. Finally, the
-shaped mezzanine over the main hall-
dance floor area provides an excellent
va ntage point for checking out those 'of
the opposite sex.
In order to remain within the budget,
four main building changes had to take
place; only one of which will affect the
average student. Firstly, the connection
to the U of W tunnel system has been
deleted, but the most contentious of the
four changes is the reduction ofthe size,
and the function of the kitchen. As origi-
nally conceived, the building was to be
able to support banquets, but now the
ground floor space must be used to
house the electrical and mechanical
equipment which was to be in the base-
ment. Banquets will still be possible in
'Fed Hall II' but they'll have to be
catered.
The bulk of the other 40 plus changes
are all in materials and construction
methods so, if you're interested, see the
Feds. (some info. is available in the
Orifice).
l.-J._'_-L. _____________ . ...::. - ......
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All in all , the pub we are going to
have, and pay for, will probably be one
of the best student pubs in Ontario - a
place you can be proud to get drunk in.
Key: To Floor Plan
1. Main Entrance
2. Entrance Hall
3. Lounge
4. Terrace
5. Stand-up Bar
6. Electrical Room
7. Bar Cooler
8. Liquor Storage
9. Staff Washroom
10. Staff Washroom
11. Receiving
12. Storage
3. Ki.tchen
14. Servery
15. MainHallSeating
16. DanceFloor
17. Stage
18. Courtyard
19. Mechanical Roonl
, 20. Washroom
21. Washroom
22. DreSSing Room
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23. Electrical Room
24. Janitor's Room
25. Manager's Office
3
26. Satellite Bars
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FEDERATION HALL
Floor Plan
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Mezzanine
Main Floor
Rob Lee

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2 May 1984
So You Want to Write an Article
First off. you have to know what you
want to write about. Is there something
that you're pissed off at? (Co-ordination
has 'misplaced' your work report again.)
Is there something you're knowledgeable
111 that others would want to know
about? Like making rye with a $15 barrel
and three gallons of water, without the
risk of going blind. How about a tale of
gripping drama and wanton sex'? YOU
write about the cute blonde YOlJ
picked up at the pub Thur day night.
who turncq out to have a thing for spurs
and branding irons. In any event. vall
can't start writing until you've a
subject; that would be like getting a
bunch of people together for a game of
baseball, and no-one has a ball.
Any lobotomized Arts student can
Il'rile an article - the tric i ' makin i
intere ting so that the reader doesn't give
up after the second sentence. Nothing is
more frustrating than reading something
that lurches around in circles, continu-
ally stopping and starting off in a new
direction. It gets you wondering if the
author knew what he was writingabout.
or if he was just making it up as he went
along.
Thursday,
May 10
8pm
Waterloo Inn
feds $5.50
others $6.50
Therefore, your next step should be to
draw up a game plan a list of the
points you want to cover, in order. Toss
in an introductory paragraph or two, a
{'losing statement. and you're laughing.
You'd be suprised how may people start
writing with an idea in mind, but no
clear sense of direction. Before they're
halfway through the first page they've
become bogged down in the confusion,
and either givc up or settle for a luke-
warm piece of prose no-one but their
mothers will read.
Okay, so now that you've got a subject
and you've developed a .game plan it'
time to fill in the blanks. Go nuts. Start
Writing, following your game plan. and
don't stop to think about what you've
written; there'll be plenty of time for that
I t r. Ri II n W ou ' u 1 w' to
everything down on paper - it's easy to
lose your train of thought by rereading
what you've just written. This is where
that all-purpose excuse "writer'S block"
comes from. It takes a grcat dcal of sclf-
discipline to keep plugging away, with-
out going back to add a semicolon or
insert an adjective.
on track without being distracted cvcry
lifteen minutes. Find a quiet place where
you can write, uninterrruptcd byalumi-
num siding salesmen or .Iehova's Wit-
nesses. Lock your elf in the washroom,
put on the hcadphones and crank the
tunes-, kick your girlfriend out of the
apartment: do what you have to so that
you can concentrate on your writing.
And then, when you're done, grab a becr
and put everything away for a while. All
that's left now is revision, and you can
take your time at this.
Revising your article means worrying
about grammar, spelling, punctuation,
synonyms, and all those nasty words
from Grade 10 English. This doesn't
mean where to put the period in a sent-
ence. 1 could fill pages with advice on
v r hin from split inlmitivc to wa s
of cutting out unnecessary words, but
my hand's beginning to cramp as it is.
Be ides, there're d07ens of hooks availa-
ble on this subjcct; pick up a cop of
trunk and Whitc's nil' /:1'II/'lJls oj
SlY/' . It's only $4.95 and unless you're
severely dyslexic you should be able to
read it in an hour or so.
tickets available in the fed office
/
f
Revising your article will most likely
take far longer than writing it did, and
don't be surpirised if the finished pro-
duct bears no resemblance to the origi-
nal. This is the hardest part of writing;
you've got to take what you' e written
the raw material. reshape it to fit your
game plan, and smooth and polish all
the rough edges. A ' writer makes. or
breaks it here; what emerges will either
be an interesting, informative piece, ot
dull, drab drivel. If what you've got at
this point doesl1'tlook so good, keep at
it. No-one got anywhere by giving up
easily.
Hopefully, at the end of all this you
should have in your hot little hands a
readable, to-the-point article. Submit it
to Chris so she can run it in Heliograph,
or send it off to H ust\er if you're inter-
ested in monetary rewards. You can even
frame it and hang it above the mantel-
piece next to the picture of Grandma
and Grandpa skinl1 I lipping at Sca-
World . .I list kl:ep in milld thoSl: fOllr
subject, ga me plan, writing, and
r 'vlslng or '-II hat you end up with may
onl b' good enough for lining Scrt the
Budgie's cage.
Richard Ordul
/
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BELlO
Who Took Care of the Shop
So once again those A-Soccrs who've
been minding the store are gone, and it's
time lo tally up the damage. Some of the
more memorable moments:
JANUARY
Our beloved secretary Liz quit the
week before classes started. She wanted
a real job with real Engineers.
A new
secretary was hired but lasted only two
weeks. Finally A-Soc hired one of their
own to fill in for the next few months
The office was rearranged to bnng
into use the Engineering Society's new
IBM Pc.
00diva Parade - A-Soc couldn't
handle the real thing so they got by with
a blow-up doll (it's the story of their
lives).
Coffee machine in C & 0 decided to
make coffee by itself - at night.
First Exec meeting - these guys don't
~ ~ like us at all- id 1 was from "G' Soc.
Jan. 25th - Engineering weekend -
the usual stuff - but not as good as
ours.
FEBRUARY
POETS was calmer this term, with ne
P**5 points being given, but a newactiv
ity was introduced, the Thursday Dou-
ble Feature Movies and Popcorn
Afternoon.
Engineers loved Athenas night -
PHHB (Plummers Hard Hat Band) and
other engineers attended basketball
game. Four A-Soeers came out of the
closet, leading cheers during half time in
tutus.
Carousel of Ilealth at CC - many
displays and demonstrations on all
aspects of health. (A-Socer ' pass the
breathalY7er)
Everyonc'sji'iendTom Allison wins as
Fed Pre 7..
Basketball Warrior take first place
in their division.
MARCH
Bus Push - Frank Gerenscer wins
again, collecting another waterbed for
his soon to open waterbed store. ($5,500
was raised)
Ontario Engineering Design Compe-
tition comes to town. Biggest success
ever (run by B Soc). The success of the
O.E.D.C. has led to the formation of 3
other regional and national competi-
tions.
Volleyball - Warriors win O.U.A.A.
championship.
Basketball Warriors end up fourth
at c.1.A.U.
Engineering Week - Along with the
usual events there was a 3 foot sub eating
contest, tobacco spitting, whip cream pie
throwing, and arm break (oops. that
should be arm wrestling) contest.
Six brews fail biological testing for the
End of Term Pub.
First Annual Engineering Ball was a
huge uccess a tradition ha started.
APRIL
Engineering Society Space Expansion
Project progressing, in leaps and
bounds. (See Rebirth of Carl Pollock
Hall for details.)
Classes end - most people notice
after one week.
Great end of term part at unnydale
- about 200 people, I large bonflre, I
large fire truck, several police cars, etc ..
etc., etc.,
Exams over.
Although A-Soc was a bit more
sedate during the term, they were well
organized and fostered a satisfactory
amount of spirit. But, let's show them
how to do it right this summer.
Rob Lee
Denis Van Decker
Why do engineering students take lab
courses?
There are valid reasons for these
Jabs, but are these reasons appropriate
to the average student's education? Or
more importantly, is it not possible to
propose a new more useful and reward-
ing system that would attain the desired
goals?
Engineers have such a heavy lab con-
tent primarily to satisfy the requirements
of the Canadian Accreditation Board
(CAB). From my own experience there
are basically three reasons for labs'. To
teach analytical laboratory techniques,
as a training ground for professional
researchers, and to demonstrate theoret-
ical principles.
The knowledge of these analytical
techniques are important in the Co-op
PREZ SPEWS
sytem as many tudent may have lab
technician jobs. BUT, no matter how
hard the faculty trie to keep UP'" ith the
latest in equipment, only rarely will an
individual use the same piece of equip-
ment or techniques on the job as I he
used at school. R ega rd les of whether we
use the techniques or not. few of us will
require skills in the big work term
in the sky, except for the profe ional
researchers.
As for the professional researchers, I
feel that it is unfair and self-serving of
universities to be using a disproportion-
ate amount of lab training when com-
pared to the types of jobs we are going to
have upon graduation. We hear about
the need for cooperation between acade-
mia and businesses and the start is by
training professionals in a manner that is
more appropriate to the real world.
The last reason for labs is to visually
demonstrate the theoretical principles
that are taught in the cia room. A noble
cause. but at what co t? We are continu-
ally hearing about the deterioration in
the tate of lab equipment and the result-
ing cry for more funds for replacement
(a la QE M F). But, the technology is here
toda that would perform the e demon-
stration more effecti ely while minimiz-
ing the ca h drain that labs have had on
the facultie coffers.
Labs have been a tradition of the engi-
neering education for year, and rightly
so. But, now the time are changing and
we are in the midst of a new technologi-
cal re olution. Accordingly, it i Lime
that labs receive their just place in the
educational system and no more. These
technological advances may be used to
improve our education if the resources
(space, time and money) are re-
allocated.
The reallocation hould be towards
the tool of today's Engineer - THE
2 May 1984
COMPUTER. Waterloo should be the
leader, a it ha been, in this new educa-
tional era. Specifically, the resources
- -hould be allocated to the areas of com-
puter application such as CAD/ CAM,
Structural analysis, Ouid Oow, process
control etc. The e are but a few of the
package - that we know about today.
Undoubtedly there will be much more
available tomorrow if educational insti-
tutions plan to be . uitably poised to
de elop and take advantage of them in
the curriculum.
The issues raised above have many
ensitivities and complexities that would
ha e to be examined. The important
thing now is for people to question
authority in a constructive manner so
that we will get an education that will be
useful not only today, but in twenty
years when the changes will be all too
apparent and the necessary retraining
processes too painful.
--_._-- ----------- -
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BELlO
I guess this started three months ago
when Chris, being the very persuasive
person that she is, convinced me to write
a monthly article on the pubs and restau-
rants around Kitchener-Waterloo. It
seemed like a harmless idea at the time
and she was picking up the check for
lunch so I wasn't about to make a fuss.
She's a very determined woman, so just
to be on the safe side, she wrote me a
couple of letters from Germany, where
she spent her workterm, to male sure I
wrote this article.
Well, I just spoke to her today, (the
day she told me to have the articles ready
by) and I knew there was going to be
massive trouble. She started off by tell-
ing me how cold the people were in Ger-
many, she had a terrible flight, and she
just had a very painful ordeal at the
dentist. Then came the cruncher. "Where
are the *&%$#$%!*% articles". I
thought she would yell and scream, but
she didn't. She just made me feel like a
slime and said she had no respect for me
as a human being. I guess I deserved it.
I'm sorry Chris.
The real irony is that I have to write
the articles anyway!
So much for the history of the article.
1 may as well tell you what "LOADED
STATE" is all about.
LOADED STATE will deal with two
pubs and one restaurant in the K-W area
each month. This will enable you to dis-
cover new places and will give you an
idea of what to expect before you get
there. I'll try to describe each place as
best I can and let you decide for yourself.
The Mandarin Duck
( downstairs)
Locateel on the southwest corner q(
King and Weher North.
I discovered this place kind of by acci-
dent. Dinner ended a little earlier than
expected upstairs (we can talk about this
in the next issue). Being a terrible night
out, we decided to follow our ears to the
music playing downstairs. With the type
of clientele in the restaurant, I was
expecting the geriatric crowd in polyes-
ter suits downstairs. I was wrong!
The first thing I noticed was a live
band. I quickly turned around to make
sure there wasn't a large irate bouncer
about to tear my head off for not paying
a cover, but there wasn't one. In fact,
there was no bouncer in the whole place.
I don't know, maybe this isn't surprising
to most people, but beingacity boy from
T.O. even your local high school dance
had a cover, and 14 Metropolitan
Toronto police officers armed with clubs
standing by.
The next thing that popped into my
mind was that this must be the owner's
son's band, who had been turned down
for the gig at their first cousin's barmitz-
vah. You guessed it. Wrong again! This
band was good.
TM world Isfoll ofwllling
people. SOrtUI art willing to
work and tM others art willing
to let tMm - but sortUltima
not.
LOADED STATE
This establishment seems to concen-
trate on a musical mixture of new wave
and Rock 'n Roll. There's an adequately
sized dance floor in front of the stage,
which suits this somewhat small pub
quite well.
There is r,;) or dress code. Most
people are dressed In their university
preppy outfits or just jeans, but I'm not
sure if the crowd is. mostly university
students. There seems to be a fair
number of high school kids in here too.
(Thj may come in handy for you frosh,
so forget to wear you U of W:
jacket.)
The place really starts to party at
about 10:00 p.m., but I would advise that
you get there at about eight or you won't
get a seat. Also, it's best to go with a
small group or ju t a date. This pub is
just for dancing. Talking is difficult when
the band is playing. The atmosphere is
dim and close, so it's a good place to
meet people by dancing. From what I
can recall, the drinks are average in
pnce.
All in all, I feel this is a great place to
go with a friend after dinner for some
fast paced dancing. A real change from
the two thousand pubs in Toronto that
only play top 40 on Friday and Saturday
nights.
The Bomb Shelter
u vr W Campus Cel11er.
M y mother always told me if you can't
say anything good about somethi ng,
then don't say anything at all. So this
one's going to be real short folks!
Let me see. If I really concentrate,
maybe I can think of something positive
to say about this place.
The drinks are cheap. Va! That's it.
The drinks are cheap! (Of course they're
even cheaper at the beer and liquor
stores and the decor is much nicer.)
It is a convenient place to go for a
drink before, during, and after classes.
It's supposed to be nice outside in the
summer on the new patio. (But so is
McGinnis Landing and the Grad
house.)
This pub's a good place to go with a
group of 15 or more of your best drink-
ing buddies, preferably drunk before
you get there.
I won't get into all the negative points
because we all know them and I prom-
ised I would keep this short.
In summary, thank god they're build-
ing us another pub.
O.K. Let's move on to the restaurant.
EXPERIENCE IT
Monday -
SPORTS NIGHT
Tuesday & Wednesday
VIDEO NIGHTS
HAPPY HOUR
Mon. to Fri. 2-6:30 p.m.
Friday and Saturday
Aphorisms
Loca/ed on King Sr. North. Water/vo.
Phone 886-2372.
Very small and mtllnate. Definitely
take a friend you're trying to impres .
This place is classy in a casual sort of
way. There's two rows of tables with a
seating capacity of about 200 people.
Classical or jazz music is usually playing
in the background and the feelihg is very
warm.
The menu consists of natural foods
such as seafood and crepes. This place is
very close to being vegetarian. The prices
are very reasonable. Two people can
dine with drinks for around 20 dollars.
Aphorisms is great anytime. For lunch
or dinner. But make sure you call ahead,
it's becomeing popular! Everyone I've
talked to, loved it.
Well, that's it for the first LOADED
STATE article. Just in time too. I can
start getting ready for work. This article
may have been somewhat opinionated,
but it was the only way I could compen-
sate for the lack of factual data. Hope-
fully you've discovered a new place to go
and I have redeemed myself with Chris.
I'll be back next issue.
Peter Vermes
"Dance Da D" nce ance
Fri. Cover $1 - Sat. Cover $2
No Cover Before 8 p.m. Proper Attire Please
Surprise Happy Hour
Rubvs
A Gem of a Night Spot
2 May 1984
Atomec Power
Destroys Civilians
Cap't Zilon
Last term, the 3 B Civil class used the
first issue of Heliograph to describe how
their classes captured the Engineering
P**5 race the previous term. It gives me
great pleasure to continue this tradition.
and tell you how 38 Mech Eng, better
known as Atomech Power, were able to
dethrone the Civilians last fall.
Unlike the Civilians, previously the
epitome of apathy, Atomech Power
were continually a close second or third
in the P**5 race, but the title always
seemed to elude the class. The explana-
tion for the semi-success, was a hardcore
of students who appeared to be involved
in virtually all sporting and engineering
events. The majority of these students
were repeaters who continued to over-
look the notion that university is a place
of learning.
The class was lead by two class reps.
who made the perfect couple. One was a
supposed jock. while the other was an
admitted transvestite. Both were spirited
leaders but failed to draw more than the
average, usually 20% of the class. to
participate.
Last term, for some reason unknown
to mankind, this odd couple was elected
to the Engineering Society's elected exec-
utive. Thus, the class rep positions were
left open. Following the precedent set
by other classes, four people were
appointed as class reps to /landle the
various chores. These characters were as
different as only a fiction writer could
class members participate in the only
tunt of the term, a illustrated by the
photograph appearing in the Kitchener-
Waterloo Record. It should be menti-
oned that the students involved in the
4:00 a.m. luur de fon'e were up at the
time, collaborating on numerous as ign-
ments and labs.
The point to be made is. it doesn't
require a small number of people to par-
ticipate in all of the activities, but rather
a few more people to participate in more
of the activities, to win the P**5 race. I
produce. One was the army general type, , I . '11 f h
th th
' k d th HOpe t liS WI encourage some 0 t ose
ano er, e senous wor er, an e t d h II I
other two were ghostlike figures during u e
l
ntds w 0 nodrma y wfou
h
d .1?et
I
mvo ve . to allen some 0 t e acllvltles
c asses. d 'labl hi' .
Th' d t be th k ma e aval e to tern. t may Just glve
. . IS 0 e ey we were a person someching to talk about with
mlssmg 10 prevIous terms. The class reps f h' I be 'd h
were able to communicate to the various some 0 . IS C Sl es t e
f I
' th' th I d answers to next day s assignment. It may
groups 0 peop e WI In e c ass, an I . .
the result was a significant increase in a so h
a
. person to
participation for a lot of the events. As remem r t elr years at umverslty y.
an example, we had three dozen, or so, Joe Correia
Yet another new season for this
column. I'vc changed my name to make
it sound a little more natural? This term's
first problem is one we can all relate to:
John, Jack and Joe are 3 co-op
engineers on a work term. Interviews
didn't go so hot so their occupations are
chauffeur, fisherman, and bootlegger.
One of the three is a Civie, one's a
Mechie, and one's a Syssie. Note that
neither the occupations or disciplines are
in the correct order. You know the
foUowing:
I) The chaffeur offended the Civie by
laughing at his long hair.
2) The Mecliie bought a quart of gin
from the bootlegger.
3) The chauffeur married the Mechie's
sister.
4) Jack owed the Syssie $5.
5) Joe beat both Jack and the Mechie
at darts.
Just what discipline and occupation
are John, Jack, and Joc? Priz.es ofP**5
pom ot the ast correct
answers. Drop your solutions into the
mailslot of my editor in the Orifice.
Thinking of changing
your name toAardvark?
Don't!
To get
the news
before everyone else
o read Heliograh!
HELlO
/'
MAY
SUNDAY MONDAY TUESDAY WEDNESDAY THURSDAY FRIDAY SATURDAY
r--------- ---------,..---------,--------- ~ . ----------"""---------.
I Yesterday. 1 Today. 2 Tom morrow. 3 The Clash. 4 5 II
I Cinema Gratis, Blue Peter Pub. 8 p.m., PAC.
I .- Stephen King festival. 8 p.m., Waterloo Inn. I
I 8 p.m .. CC Great Hall. I
1 I
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ . ~ ~ ~ I ~
I 6 7 Work reports 8 Welcome Back 9 Engineering 10 The Frogman 11 The infamous 12 I
I due. Stagg. Buses leave at Weekend starts. Triathalon. Bring your Chariot Race. I
I Council Meeting #1 . 7 p.m. from E1 cul-de- Check the schedule snorkels and flippers. Get building yours now. I
I 7 p.m., NH 3001. sac. for events. I
L I
II EngSoc Volleyball
Tourney.
I Mother's Day; phone
I home and say hi.
I
I
;
I
I
I
I
I
I
I
I
I
I
13 Tenth day 14
of classes. Still with us?
20 Victoria Day. 21
27 28
Council
Meeting #2. 7 p.m ..
NH 3001 .
15
22
Heliograph #2. 29
campus-wide circulation.
Nothing 16
important occured on
this date in history.
23
30
Iron Warrior
#1, campus-wide
circulation.
17
Queen Victoria 24
was an illegitimate child.
31
EngSoc 18
24 weekend movies until
Monday.
Boat Racing,
time and location
to be announced.
25
I
19 I
I
I
I
I
i
26 I
I
I
I
;
I
I
I
I
1 ______ ---_________ _______________________________________ ... _________ 1
Engineering Weekend
Thursday 10 Pinto Packing
Cap Flicking
Nail Driving
Log Sawing
Friday 11
Plank Race (wear nylons)
Relay ASSignment Cloning
Paper Airplane Contest
Frogman Triathalon (sprinting,
skipping, and cycling, Show
up in ful scuba gear for
extra points).
Saturday 12 Chariot Race
Bowling
Sunday 13 Volleyball Tourney
NOTE - Volunteers are needed to help run these events.
Sign up in the Orifice.
Cinema Gratis, CC Great Hall
Today, Wednesday, May 2. Stephen
King festival, starts at 8 p.m. Carrie,
The Shining, Cujo, The Dead Zone.
May 9. Shoot the Moon.
May 16. An American Werewolf in
London.
Mar 23. Fanny and Alexander.
May 30. Kelly's Heroes.
noon
all day
all day
all day
2:00
3:00
1:30
2:30
tba
tba
all day
This blurb is a rundown of EngSoc
services (recently added and ongoing
services).
). Photocopier
5(1: photocopies are available outside
the Orifice. This is a graphics service
from which EngSoc makes 1.9(1: a copy
(to help pay Maria for the hassles of
operating the thing). And soon you'll see
a card copier, too.
2. Used Bookstore
This is co-sponsored with the Feds,
and runs the first two weeks of the term.
Bring all your used Engineering texts.
3. Poets Pub
An agreement has been worked out
such that EngSoc pays a fIXed overhead
charge per event plus all variable costs.
This results in a higher breakeven point
(9 cases vs 6 cases) but finally a chance to
make some money (instead of Bar Servi-
ces gettmg It) and put it back into the
new pub.
Improvements in the works include
table hockey, ongoing tournaments
(backgammon, Trivial Pursuit, and so
on), the latest videos, and new pinball
machines. So come out, drink a beer,
and support your pub.
4. Garage
Once again this term we're running a
student garage. There is a flve dollar
membership fee. Your student 1.0. card
must be left when you pick up a garage
key. You'll have to fill out a waiver form
every time you use the garage and you
may only book the garage for one day at
a time. It's a dry place to do minor
repairs. Orop'by the Orifice to find out
more about it.
S. Old Exams
We've got files and more files of old
and not-so-old exams in the Orifice. Just
give Maria your student 1.0. card and
you can have any exams you want.
6. ,,' ootban, Frisbees, Darts, Bottle
Capper
These items may also be borrowed
from the Orifice in exchange for you
l.0. card.
7. Darkroom
EngSoc runs a student darkroom. A
membership fee of $3.00 is charged to
cover the cost of chemicals. As with the
garage, the darkroom may be booked
for one day at a time in exchange for an
l.0. card.
8. Novelties
EngSoc sells a variety of novelties,
which for this term have been redesigned
to reflect the latest fashion trends. You
can buy EngSoc and Frosh T-shirts, key
chain beer openers, cloth EngSoc crests,
beer mugs, coffee mugs, and those nifty
plastic notes folders. Prices will be
posted in the Orifice.
Fed Flicks for May
May 4 and 5. 48 HRS.
May 11 and 12. Catch 22.
May 25 and 26. Trading Places.
Whafs in Store
by Denis Van Decker
It's going to be a busy ummer, so don't
become one of the suitcase crowd . Stick
around, check out the events, and have
some fun!
The big change in the Engineering
Society this term is the cross-campus
nature of our publications and events.
The Heliograph and Iron Warrior will
be distributed across campus so that eve-
ryone is aware of and can participate in
engineering events. Hopefully will
help to thaw engineering/ campus rela-
tions.
The list of activities for this term beg-
ins with the Welcome Back Pub tomor-
row night at the Waterloo Inn. Blue
Peter's the main attraction, and L'Etran-
ger, is opening. The new and improved
Welcome Back Stagg has been pushed
back a week to Wednesday, May9 at the
Coronet (buses will be leaving from the
E I cul-de-sac after a pre-stagg warm-up
in the POETS Pub from 2 to 6 p.m.). On
Thursday, May IO we'll be kicking off
Engineering Weekend with a Lumber-
jack Day which should prove interest-
ing. After the Pinto Packing there may
be a demolition event for charity. The
big event Friday is the Frogman Tria-
thalon with a trio of normal field events
with a new twist - scuba flippers. Fri-
day also features a challenge.to the cam-
more accurately than our all-star engi-
neering team. And on Saturday, back by
popular demand, is the infamous Cha-
riot Race. So be forewarned and start
making your buggies now (check in the
Orifice for rules and design restrictions).
If you're not heading up to Sauble
Beach on the long weekend, check out
the Double Feature Woody Allen Festi-
val running from Friday to Monday
night (with movies like Sleeper).
On Friday, May 25, Fleet Com-
mander Gamble will initiate the new
Official Boat Racing Table, complete
with electronic timing and sensors. This
first Nautical of the summer is open to
teams from across the campus, so head
down to the Orifice and sign up. Exact
details of times and place (somewhere in
Sunnydale) will be announced.
Some of the possibilities for the rest of
the term include a pub rally June 2,
movies during the July I weekend, and
picnic/bluegrass festival somewhere in a
farmer's field, plus the usual
of athletic events and pubs.
Engineering Week is being resurrected
on July 5 with a pub, and will wind up
on July 14 with the South Pacific
pseudo-formal. The road trip of the
summer occurs when the Argos play the
Edmonton Eskimos July 22 at Exhibi-
tion Stadium. We have 500 seats at mid-
field reserved (price should be around
$17 including return bus trip) so come
out and watch the Grey Cup champions
romp all over the Esks.
Details on these events and many
more will be in upcoming issues of the
Heliograph (May 29 and July 3) as well
as in the Orifice. So come out, take a
break, and have some fun.
2 May 1984
Welcome Back Pub
with special guests
L'etranger
,
Thursday May 3rd
Waterloo Inn
$4 reel eng $5 others