Interaction Styles

Jan De Keyser (32) 476 34 64 91

Communication Style Quadrants

Take the test: http://www.jtodonnell.com/assessment/index.phtml Show emotions

Energizer
Tell

Empathyzer
Ask

Commander

Contemplator

Hide emotions

Recognizing Asking versus Telling

Ask
Softer Slower Less Back Less Less Volume of speech Pacing of speech Expressing opinions Body posture Directive gestures Eye contact

Tell
Louder Faster More Toward More

More

Recognizing Emotion-Orientation
Show emotion More More People Varied More Facial expressions Use of hands & body Orientation Pace of delivery Inflection Hide emotion

Less Less Task Even Less Fact

Feeling

Describing things
Initial orientation

Communication Style Descriptions

Show emotions Creative Enthusiastic Humorous Energetic Focus on vision Promoter

Energizer

Tell

Supportive Empathic Empathyzer Loyal Group-oriented Team focus Sharing Ask

Commander

Objective Decisive Precise Tough Thorough Candid Detailed Efficient Rational Results-oriented Controlled Pragmatic Hide emotions

Contemplator

Communication rules
The Golden rule Treat other people like you want to be treated yourself

The platinum rule Treat other people like they want to be treated

Polar Exercise
What are three Strengths/ three Weaknesses of your style ?

How do you like to communicate?

How do you want to be approached when people try to convince you ?

Style Flexing
Using interpersonal acumen to temporarily adjust your behavior to manage tension and to encourage others to behave more productively with you

Style Flexing
Style flexing is like going to another country and adjusting to the customs and mores of that country, their language, their rituals, and their preferences. Flexing on the job is knowing people critical to your success well enough so when you are communicating with them you are considering their preferences and adapting yourself accordingly.

How to Influence an Contemplator

How to Build Rapport How to Use Your Time How to Influence Decisions

Be business like and task

oriented

Make it easy to cooperate Support principles and

thinking 1. Ask questions about specifics 2. Stick with specifics 3. Reinforce that the decision is right 4. Earn credibility, e.g., be organized, on time, prepared 5. Indicate what you can and will support 6. Do what you say you will 7. Praise strategy, not person

Be conscious about time Demonstrate a slower pace Take time to be accurate

1. 2. 3. 4. 5. Prepare prior to meeting Be on time Take time to be persistent Slow pace to action Do not rush to close

Emphasize the data Demonstrate acceptable risk Provide evidence with service
1. Provide evidence to support facts 2. Results should be solid, tangible, and practical 3. Offer assurances that decision will be valid in future 4. Reassure (with facts) that decision is correct 5. Use data, not words

How to Influence an Energizer

How to Build Rapport How to Use Your Time How to Influence Decisions

Lighten up, be open Contribute without competing Support dreams and

intuitions 1. Take early initiative to show personal interest in the person 2. Reinforce the Expressers opinions 3. Spend time exploring mutually stimulating ideas 4. Contribute to the conversation 5. You handle details

Be casual about time Move quickly Take time to be stimulating

1. Focus on their interests 2. Use word pictures and analogies 3. Use motivational stories 4. Get to the point 5. Keep them on track

Discover the
opinions/intuitions

Create a vision Provide testimony/incentives

1. 2. 3. 4. Allow room for intuition Relate stories Provide testimonial Offer special, immediate and extra incentives 5. You propose, they dispose

How to Influence a Empathyzer

How to Build Rapport How to Use Your Time How to Influence Decisions

Lighten up, be open Make it easy to cooperate Support feelings and

relationships 1. Ask questions about opinions and ideas 2. Be cooperative 3. Communicate patiently 4. Explore dissatisfactions 5. Avoid conflict 6. Indicate everything you can support on their personal feelings and values 7. Avoid logical debates

Be casual about time Demonstrate a slower pace Take time to be agreeable

1. Initiate contact 2. Move slowly 3. Cover details as appropriate 4. Be personal and informal

Discover the
opinions/intuitions

You propose, they dispose Provide guarantees/

assurances 1. Offer personal opinions 2. Take time to develop relationship 3. Offer personal guarantees that minimize risks 4. Provide personal reassurance that you will stand behind decision

How to Influence a Commander

How to Build Rapport How to Use Your Time How to Influence Decisions

Be businesslike and taskoriented

Contribute without competing Support conclusions and

actions 1. Be results oriented 2. Stick with what and how questions 3. Support the results the Director wants 4. Suggest actions, options, and risk analysis 5. Offer ideas without polarizing issues 6. Do not discuss philosophies

Be conscious about time Move quickly Take time to be efficient

1. Demonstrate efficiency 2. Make your point in simple, direct manner 3. Stay on target 4. Do not waste time 5. Be specific, be brief

Develop the data You propose, they dispose Provide options/possibilities

1. Provide alternatives 2. Provide facts, data, probabilities 3. Allow them to make decisions 4. Have your own opinion/recommendations/ reasons 5. Support the position, not the person