Every Mans Battle

A careful examination into the subject of sexual temptation in the bible and the devastation caused by sexual immorality in our modern society.

Chaplain M. Hamilton Stevens, M.Min

Every Mans Battle

Scriptures from King James Version

Mark H. Stevens
Crowned-Warrior Publishing Co. Jan.2004 Chaplainstevens@gmail.com P.O. Box 1497 Browns Mills, New Jersey 08015

All right reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or copied in any form or otherwise by any means, except for brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews, without permission from the publisher of the author.

Cover: Theocentric Graphics

Table of Contents Introduction Chapter One History of Sexual Sin Chapter Two Why Satan Uses Sex Chapter Three Why Sex Sin is so Devastating Chapter Four Kryptonite for Men of God Chapter Five Generational Curses & Demonic Activity Chapter Six Pornography Authors Biography

INTRODUCTION
I am writing this book with the hope of helping Christian men (and women) that may be struggling with sexual sin and the temptations connected with sexual sin. We live in an age when illicit sexual intercourse is the norm, Pornography is in mainstream society, and sexual perversions are considered the everyday way that modern men and women live. The Bible is filled with examples of the same sins and struggles we have today. Samson is on the cover because he was the poster child for a believer with sexual addictions. Samson however had a comeback because he cried out to God. If you are struggling, maybe its time for you to cry out for help. The problem is the pulpit is silent on the subject of sexuality positive or negative. Young people today need direction and answers on issues concerning sex. The average teenager today starts having sex at the age of 14; this is terrifying to me. I was exposed to pornography when I was about 12 years old growing up in Connecticut. My brother had a trunk in the attic filled with hardcore porn and I found it. I would secretly go to the attic after school and look at it, I never told anyone or shared my discovery with friends. Porno has haunted me most of my life, I accepted Christ at the age of 14, and thanks to the power of the Holy Spirit I began to feel convicted about my activities. The sad truth is even after becoming a Christian I realized the images had already done their damage. After joining the Air Force at 18 my first roommate was a porn junkie, and I fell back into temptation again. Eventually I was able to request a new roommate but the damage was done. To this day I have to make a daily concerted effort to pray and seek God for strength. I put blocks on my computers and I make sure I dont go in stores that sell porno like 7-11 and other corner stores. I cant let my guard down EVER because I know that is an area of weakness for me; but not just me but millions of other men, yes Christian men too! I hope this short book will help you realize how the enemy carefully calculates your destruction through the avenue of sexual sin. I share some funny stories and personal things so you will know you are not alone in this struggle. Jude 24 is my favorite scripture when it comes to God keeping us in this evil world, meditate on it and make it your mantra. The Lord can keep you from falling, sometime even when you DONT want to be kept! If dont believe me keep reading!

CHAPTER ONE THE HISTORY OF SEXUAL SIN 22 And Ham, the father of Canaan, saw the nakedness of his father, and told his two brethren without. 23 And Shem and Japheth took a garment, and laid it upon both their shoulders, and went backward, and covered the nakedness of their father; and their faces were backward, and they saw not their father's nakedness. 24 And Noah awoke from his wine, and knew what his younger son had done unto him. 25 And he said, Cursed be Canaan; a servant of servants shall he be unto his brethren. (Genesis chapter 9) When Jonah discovered the power of the fruit of the vine, he also became the first victim of sexual sin. For years people have indicted Ham as a bad son because he discovered his fathers nakedness. Granted he should have used more discretion by covering his father, but it was Noah who got drunk and allowed his nakedness to be on display. The real villain never gets identified by most peoplethis would be Canaan! Ham was not cursed by Noah, what would make a man CURSE his grandson! It had to have been something really awful. Lets look at some other scripture. 15 Woe unto him that giveth his neighbor drink, that puttest thy bottle to him, and makest him drunken also, that thou mayest look on their nakedness! 16 Thou art filled with shame for glory: drink thou also, and let thy foreskin be uncovered: the cup of the LORD'S right hand shall be turned unto thee, and shameful spewing shall be on thy glory. (Hab. Chapt.2)

Drunkenness often leads to sexual immorality, this is not something someone told me, and Ive been there! A persons inhibitions are lowered when drunk; will power goes out of the window. When I was a young unsaved airman back in the seventies, I would get so drunk I couldnt remember what I did the night before. I believe Canaan was guilty of taking advantage of his grandfathers drunkenness. Canaan is the father of Sodom and Gomorra. They were CANAANITES! I strongly believe Canaan was the first homosexual in the Bible. The Canaanites were the most sexually deviant people of their time! 7 Keeping mercy for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin, and that will by no means clear the guilty; visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children, and upon the children's children, unto the third and to the fourth generation. (Exodus chapter 34)

Sexual sins pass through bloodlines because the demons that influence the perpetrators, never die! These vile spirits haunt families for years. Have you ever noticed how certain sins and habits are prevalent in certain families? Watch the Jerry Springer Show or some of the other trash talk shows and you will see my point. Example - Bubba is a drunken adulterer, Bubbas daddy is a drunken adulterer, and Bubbas grandfather is a drunken adulterer. My point, sin travels through generations. The only cure is Jesus Christ! The Lord Jesus Christ is the curse reverser. The power of God stops the demonic flow through families. When I worked as a County Corrections Officer in Burlington County, New Jersey, I would often see the devastating effects of generation curses. I processed an inmate one summer evening that molested his daughters. Within six months of his
6

incarceration, The Lord gave me opportunity to lead him to salvation. This individual had repented of his deeds and took full responsibility for his actions, but he shared something with me that sobered me on the subject of generation curses and sins. He told me his father molested him for nearly 3 years, and his father was also molested. This does not excuse an individual, but it helps us understand the demons behind the molestation that haunted this family, and that wrecked havoc in their lives. The fact that the jailed father accepted Christ and repented put a stop to this demonic onslaught. (Read Psalms 32, 38, and 51) Unconfessed sin makes us not only an emotional wreck, but can affect us physically as well.
Ps 38:1

O LORD, do not rebuke me in your anger or discipline me in your wrath. Ps 38:2 For your arrows have pierced me, and your hand has come down upon me. Ps 38:3 Because of your wrath there is no health in my body; my bones have no soundness because of my sin. Ps 38:4 My guilt has overwhelmed me like a burden too heavy to bear.
Ps 38:5

My wounds fester and are loathsome because of my sinful folly. Ps 38:6 I am bowed down and brought very low; all day long I go about mourning. Ps 38:7 My back is filled with searing pain; there is no health in my body. Ps 38:8 I am feeble and utterly crushed; I groan in anguish of heart.
Ps 38:9

All my longings lie open before you, O Lord; my sighing is not hidden from you. Ps 38:10 My heart pounds, my strength fails me; even the light has gone from my eyes. Ps 38:11 My friends and companions avoid me because of my wounds. NIV

CHAPTER TWO Why Satan Uses Sex

6 And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat. 7 And the eyes of them both were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together, and made themselves aprons. (Gen. Chapter 3)

28 But I say unto you, that whosoever looketh on a woman to lust

after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart. (Matt. Chapter 5) KJV

25 Lust not after her beauty in thine heart; neither let her take thee with her eyelids. 26 for by means of a whorish woman a man is brought to a piece of bread: and the adulteress will hunt for the precious life. 27 Can a man takes fire in his bosom, and his clothes not be burned? 28 Can one go upon hot coals, and his feet not be burned? (Prov. Chapter 6) KJV

Satan uses sex for on simple reasonIT WORKS! In the beginning God created man (Adam) and declared, It is not good for the man to be alone. God created a woman FOR the man. Man was built to desire a woman. Satan went after Eve because he knew this fact. Eve gave Adam the fruit, why did Adam take it? Men throughout the ages have forsaken kingdoms, riches, position, and even God for the love of a woman. John the Baptist lost his head because of a promise Herod had to keep. Take a look!
6 But when Herod's birthday was kept, the daughter of Herodias danced before them, and pleased Herod. 7 whereupon he promised with an oath to give her whatsoever she would ask.

8 and she, being before instructed of her mother, said, Give me here John Baptist's head in a charger. 8 And the king was sorry: nevertheless for the oath's sake, and them, which sat with him at meat, he commanded it to be given her. (Matt. Chapter 14) KJV

Herod was so driven by lust over Herodias daughters seductive dance, he killed someone he actually admired and liked. Pornography is like gasoline on a fire, the human sex drive doesnt need a lot to motivate it, pornography sends it over the edge, and this is why Satan uses it so often. Most movies today have full nudity or partial, our music is sexually suggestive, and adultery is so commonplace even our clergymen are notorious for their fallings. Women have to realize that they are objects of beauty and that carries great responsibility on their part. Now I am not advocating women cover up like Muslims, but having your breast exposed and legs showing up to the thighs will cause men to lust plain and simple. Solomon was the worlds wisest man in the world, he was anointed by God to lead the mightiest kingdom on earth, yet he threw it all away because his desire for women. He had 700 wives and 300 concubines, and the scripture say he LOVED THEM ALL! Satan knows that woman was created for man. God created woman not only to be a companion, but also as a helper and advisor. Satan always perverts what God creates. Remember King Ahab? He was Israels most wicked king, guess were he got all of his advice? His wife Jezebel! Abraham in a bout with unbelief decided to sleep with his handmaid, because he didnt trust that God could allow Sarah to become pregnant. Who put the idea in his head to do such a thing? Sarah, his wife! Now before you accuse me of thinking woman are evil, there are many more examples of woman helping
9

advance Gods program in the Bible than not. This is my po int, if Satan can corrupt a woman, he in turn also corrupts a man as well (or men). Joseph was handpicked by God to save his people, Satan chose Potiphers wife to tempt him to commit adultery, and fortunately Joseph was committed to God.

Pr 6:32

But a man who commits adultery lacks judgment; whoever does so destroys himself. NIV

10

CHAPTER THREE Why Sexual Sin is so devastating 3 And David sent and inquired after the woman. And one said, Is not this Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam, the wife of Uriah the Hittite? (2 Sam.chapter 11)

Davids sin with Bathsheba lead to him also killing her husband as well. David spoke his own punishment when the prophet Nathan confronted him concerning his sin. Nathan used a story about a wealthy man that stole a poor mans lamb, while he had many sheep of his own. David said this man should suffer fourfold. David lost 4 sons! David and Bathsheba lost their illegitimate son, Amnon raped Tamar his sister, Absolom avenged his sister by killing Amnon, and Davids general Joab for trying to overthrow his fathers throne killed Absolom. Davids eldest son Adonijah was killed by order of Solomon because he sought to overthrow the chosen king (Solomon). All of this because David couldnt control his libido. It was no accident David was standing on a rooftop at the time Bathsheba was cleansing herself ritually. He knew who Bathsheba was. His closest advisor was her grandfather, and her husband was one of his military leaders. The seed of lust was already there; Satan just put some water on it. 32 But whoso committeth adultery with a woman lacketh understanding: he that doeth it destroyeth his own soul. 32 A wound and dishonour shall he get; and his reproach shall not be wiped away. (Prov. Chapter 6) 18 There be three things which are too wonderful for me, yea, four which I know not:

19 the way of an eagle in the air; the way of a serpent upon a rock; the way of a ship in the midst of the sea; and the way of a man with a maid. 20 such is the way of an adulterous woman; she eateth, and wipeth her mouth, and saith, I have done no wickedness. 21 For three things the earth is disquieted, and for four which it cannot bear: (Proverbs chapter 30) Adultery is very devastating because in affects not only the individuals involved, but also the innocent children, the church family if the adulterers are believers. If Satan can weaken the family structure in the home, then the church is also weakened. 26 Thou hast also committed fornication with the Egyptians thy neighbors, great of flesh; and hast increased thy whoredoms, to provoke me to anger. 27 Behold, therefore I have stretched out my hand over thee, and have diminished thine ordinary food, and delivered thee unto the will of them that hate thee, the daughters of the Philistines, which are ashamed of thy lewd way. 28 Thou hast played the whore also with the Assyrians, because thou wast unsatiable; yea, thou hast played the harlot with them, and yet couldest not be satisfied. 29 Thou hast moreover multiplied thy fornication in the land of Canaan unto Chaldea; and yet thou wast not satisfied herewith. (Ezekiel chapter 16) The children of Israel were lured away from their relationship with the Lord by sexual sin. God constantly warned Israel not to intermarry and fornicate with the heathen nations around them. Sexual intercourse unites the parties involved emotionally; this is called a SOUL TIE. This is why married couples are not truly married until they have sexual intercourse; it is the consummation of the marriage. When sex takes place between unmarried people they are still
12

emotionally tied to one another, this is why Israel backslid and followed the gods of other nations. 17 Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body. (I Cor. Chapter 6)

13

CHAPTER FOUR KRYPTONITE for Men of God When God created woman for man in the Garden of Eden she was everything man (Adam) needed or would ever want in a companion. Some of the language may be a little explicit in this chapter but it is very much biblical and needed for saints to read and understand. Many Christian thinkers and theologians have debated as to why the serpent (Satan) tempted the woman and not the man. The reason is VERY simple! A man's greatest temptation IS a woman. A woman was made specifically and carefully, by the Lord God almighty! Man was alone and needed a companion, or as the scripture states A Helpmete. In the Hebrew the word helpmete is EZER! Every time you see the word EZER in scripture it means HELP, for example the name EBEN-EZER means The Lord is my HELP. The woman is to be a mans HELP! A man is not complete without a woman. This is why men that lose wives to death OR divorce USUALLY remarry. This is also why men have a capacity to be able to also love more than one woman. In many cultures it is acceptable for a men to have more than one wife. (I am not condoning this just pointing out a fact) When the devil tempted eve he appealed to her intellect and emotions, men on the other hand are not that complex when it comes to what will get his attention. Men are visual creatures that sexually get aroused by what they see. This is why men dont need a lot of stimuli to get sexually aroused. Candles and soft music make women happy, but a man can have sex anywhere and anytime as long as the women in question is sexually appealing in some way. The truth of the matter is the woman doesnt have to be very beautiful. Women have an appeal to men that goes beyond beauty. The fact that she is a woman is often enough. God made women look very different for a reason, to

appeal to men. A womans breast are large and soft, her legs are softer than a mans are, her eyes are usually prettier and brighter, her voice softer, even her feet are pretty (some women) and her hair longer. The big DIFFERENCE is the clincher! A woman has a vagina! This body part is what separates her from a man. Remember the woman is delicate and beautiful, even her vagina resembles a flower. Women have soft lips! I remember the first girl I ever kissed on the lips! I could not sleep that night! All I could remember was how soft her lips were. Now I need to stop because I am not trying to get YOU aroused, but I am trying to make a point! The reason Satan went after the woman was he knew that the man would give in to the woman. Satan always perverts Gods gifts. Women were created to help men have dominion in the earth. (Read Proverbs 31)
Pr 31:11

Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. NIV When a man has a woman in his life that loves God and loves him he has a great treasure. In the reverse if Satan manipulates a woman in anyway the man is in trouble. I was a Correction Officer and I met a preacher in jail that had fell in love with a woman that had a drug problem. All he talked about was how beautiful she was and how her eyes made him melt; He tried to rehabilitate her but instead she caused him to fall back into his previous lifestyle which was filled with drug usage and bondage. Now he has a criminal record and she is still on drugs. How could such a thing happen? Well before I give you my thoughts just think about David. David loved God probably more than any human that ever lived did, and he fell prey to sexual temptation. We often try and pick apart the scenario that led up to the fall of David. Yes there were many factors. 1. David should have been on the battlefield.
15

2. David was away from the Ark of the Covenant, which was the very presence of God. 3. David was alone, a lack of accountability since the priest and the prophets were also on the field of battle. 4. The reason we all overlook and we dont want to deal withBATHSHEBA WAS BEAUTIFUL! I am sure David had seen other women that looked beautiful, but the devil made sure that David would see one that would cause his libido to go into overload. All men have specifics when it comes to a woman. Some men like skinny women, some men like athletic women and some men (ahem) like voluptuous women. The devil knows your fleshly desires because the weapons of HIS warfare all deal with our FLESH (I Cor. 10:13). If you like a thick, light-skinned girl, with gray eyes and pretty legs then guess what, The devil will send her your way! If dark-skinned girls with wide hips, and large breast are your thing well the devil knows that too. When I was a teenager I had a serious crush on Chaka Khan! I spent most of my adult live looking for a woman that looked like Chaka Khan, well if the devil was going to try and tempt me to stray from Jesus, sending a Chaka Khan look alike (or the real thing) would be a good place to start wearing me down. Now I have been humorous and light- hearted in this chapter, but I am a deadly serious brother, I want you to know that the devil knows just what you like on the menu. Samson is another example of how the enemy KNOWS our flesh! Samson was called of God to kill Philistines, and he was very good at it! The anointing would come upon Samson and he would kill Philistines like Orkin kills roaches! Now we know the scripture say No weapon formed against us shall prosper but Satan didnt use a weapon in the normal sense, he used a woman. In spite of Samsons failure he yet completed the task at hand (Rom. 8:28). God is omniscient and nothing takes Him by surprise, he created Samson! Of course he knew Samson had a weakness for Philistine women, in spite of that God still stacked
16

the cards in Samsons favor. I know it seems like a failure to see Samson blind and chained between two pillars, but Gods plans can NEVER be overthrown by the devil! Now I am not excusing Samsons behavior, but I am trying to make you understand something. All men have the same weakness! Our Kryptonite is a woman. Be careful men when you choose a wife! Make sure she loves God AND that she loves you! I used to tell young men, It doesnt matter what she looks like, I dont say that anymore! Physical attraction is a part of the package, especially for men! Women look at more internal issues like Is he kind, Is he a good provider, and Is he sensitive to my needs! Men are not that complicated, I kid you not! Men could see a woman working in McDonalds flipping burgers, if she is fine he will pursue her! Women will often forgo looks if the brother has earning potential and a good head on his shoulders. Some of you will accuse me of stereotyping men as being somewhat simple, but when it comes to sex and women most men are. Chris Rock the comedian once said, A man is only as faithful as his options. That of course was meant to be funny, but there is a thread of truth to this statement. If a man avoids temptation he wont fall! The Bible says in Proverbs, Can a man take fire unto his bosom and NOT be burned, I know from personal experience that this is very true! Back in 1983 I was a young Christian about to go to Korea for the second time. I had a girlfriend that attended church BUT who was not a Christian. She wanted to have sex before I left for Korea, We necked and made out but hadnt gone all the way. I avoided this because I knew it was wrong, but my resistance was way low! I agreed to getting a hotel room the night before I had to fly off to Korea. I had around $800.00 dollars in the bank, but I had to go to an ATM to get some money. I had decided to disobey God and fornicate, (by the way she looked a lot like Chaka Khan). I went to the ATM put the card in and it malfunctioned and kept my card! This was on a Saturday night so I couldnt physically go to the bank until
17

MONDAY! My flight was Sunday morning! God rescued me from sin! My anger turned to shame because I was willingly going to sin against God. I cried on the airplane because I realized how close I came to falling prey to the devil. I share this story because this woman was EXACTLY what I desired physically! She had long thick hair, brown skin, full lips, pretty eyes, high cheekbones, and she was built like a woman in a Ruben painting. Yes I am describing a woman that looks like Chaka Khan! (By the way Chakas real last name is Stevens too!) Do you understand me now! I really believe the enemy can give us the desires of our flesh. I know the Bible says delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desire of your heart in the reverse of this scripture, if you delight yourself in the things of this world, Satan will give you the desire of your flesh and emotions. We often fall prey to our emotions as well as our fleshly desires. I really liked this girl, but I knew it was wrong to fornicate! The enemy knew I was attracted to her, but he attacked me in the emotional realm (soul) as well. The young lady in question came from a troubled home. I tried to minister to her! Singles should NEVER try and minister to members of the opposite sex at all. Married ministers should NEVER minister to the opposite sex without your spouse being present! She begged me to spend the night with her. I gave in for two reasons: 1. Sexual attraction 2. The need to comfort her. Both reasons would have caused me to fall, but God intervened! Praise Jesus! There is no telling where my life would have turned out if I fell that night! When I got to Korea 2 days later (its a long flight), That was where I accepted the call to preach and also where God filled me with the Holy Ghost. Fornicating that night would have probably caused me to get off of the airplane in Seoul ready to have a one-year tour of sexcapades. I praise God for the Holy Spirit and the divine providence of God! I really believe God sets up spiritual
18

roadblocks to help us live holy. We are lying If we think we live holy because of our will power! When we admit our flesh is weak THEN we can experience the willingness of the Spirit to help us. (Read Psalms 32, 38, and 51) The devil knows that we (Christians) wont just go out on a whim and commit certain acts of disobedience. The devil will attempt to get you to start small so to speak. In the 80s I was big into weight lifting and bodybuilding. I even won a few power-lifting contests overseas. I was proud of how I sculpted my body through hard training. I was a Karate Instructor on base and I ran 5 miles a day. I used to read muscle magazines to see how the stars trained and ate. I would say about 1983 84 there was a big change in the magazines. In the early seventies the magazines were just filled with pictures of men training, diets, and articles on various topics related to the sport. As the eighties came more and more there were sexually explicit pictures. Womens bodybuilding was taking offand so were their clothes! I remember chastising a brother about buying pornography, and the Holy Spirit immediately hit me with Arent those muscle magazines pornography? I had to confess to God, myself, and the brother I was scolding that I was guilty too! Pornography is all around us! When I go to the mall in the summer and rest on a bench, I see pornography! The women wear shorts up to their butt cheeks! I dont have to go on the Internet to see something that will make me howl like a wolf! I like what Job said, I made a covenant with my eyes Men are visual creatures and we have to guard our eyes as well as our hearts. I dont care how strong a brother is, if he views pornography he will end up hooked and in need of deliverance quick, fast, and in a hurry!

19

Internet pornographers target web sites and addresses that appear to be Christian. The enemy knows that porno is a HIGHLY addictive force in his arsenal of evil tricks. I had a bad experience with pornography myself, I am not proud to admit it, but if it will help another man get free from it Praise Jesus! When I was about 12 years old I found a trunk that belonged to my brother in the attic, it was filled with pornographic magazines and photos. I guess my brother realized I found it, because months later it vanished from the house. The damage was already done! Those pictures have haunted me for years. I know I have a weakness for the stuff, (all men do) so like the scriptures tell us flee fornication The word fornication comes from the root Greek word PORNEA. God is saying FLEE (run in terror) from PORNOGRAPHY! When I was in the military I was surrounded by it! I had to request a change in roommates on 2 occasions because they were porno addicts. If I stayed their roommates I would have fallen back into the love of it. Even now I have to deal with images from years past. Even past relationships linger in our minds because of the power of the sexual union. Sex was meant to give pleasure to a husband and wife, but also it is a covenant sealer. When you have sex with someone you are really marrying him or her! The act of sex is the deal sealer! That is why God never meant for you to have multiple partners. If you recall your first sexual experience, good or bad you NEVER forget it! It becomes a strong image in your soul (emotions, will, conscience). The Lord tried to warn Israel about multiple partners, Solomon is the most tragic case. Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines! The scriptures say he loved them all. The love for these women pulled him away from his first love, GOD!
Pr 7:21

With persuasive words she led him astray; she seduced him with her smooth talk.
20

Pr 7:22

All at once he followed her like an ox going to the slaughter, like a deer stepping into a noose Pr 7:23 till an arrow pierces his liver, like a bird darting into a snare, little knowing it will cost him his life. NIV

21

CHAPTER FIVE Generation Curses and Demonic Influence

Ex 20:5

You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, Ex 34:7 maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin. Yet he does not leave the guilty unpunished; he punishes the children and their children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation. Nu 14:18 The LORD is slow to anger, abounding in love and forgiving sin and rebellion. Yet he does not leave the guilty unpunished; he punishes the children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation. Dt 5:9 You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, Ps 79:8 Do not hold against us the sins of the fathers; may your mercy come quickly to meet us, for we are in desperate need. NIV

When I used to be a Correctional Officer in my Local County Jail, I saw the best evidence for Generation Curses first hand and up close. Many time whole families would be arrested for the same offences. I saw 2 brothers (YES BROTHERS!) arrested for prostitution at a truck stop. They were transvestites and they were brothers. Their mother was a lesbian and their father was a drug addict. I had a child molester confess to me that his father molested him through most of his childhood. I also saw a Grandfather, Father, and son all arrested on drug related charges. Do you catch my drift! The demons caused people to be ensnared to sin they were drawn to, especially sexual sins. They travel through generations and bloodlines! Demons are spirits that dont die or go on vacation. If Great-Grandpa was an abusive husband, there is a good chance Grandpa will be too, and his son, and his sons son!

Accepting Jesus Christ is the start to reversing the curses. However the curses have to often be identified and confessed as sins and strongholds in order to get the breakthrough one really needs. Breaking generation curses is something that often requires confronting people that hurt you, molested you, or abused you. In forgiving the people that hurt you, you receive healing in your soul. When I was a child my father denied me, he at times would see me in public and would not speak to me, and the scars were deep because of this! When I got older I forgave my father and sought to reconcile with him. To make a long story short, we did reconcile and my father got saved! I will never forget how my father would grab people in the hospital and proclaim This is my son, Mark! Each time he would do that it felt like a healing balm in my soul. People that have been sexually abused however, it is a much more painful process. Sometimes actually deliverance sessions are needed. We see in Jesus' ministry some dramatic examples of exorcism, casting out of demons. But let's not be nave. People who have lived under a demonic delusion or obsession for a significant period of their lives need a period of recovery, even though the root demonic cause of the problem has been dealt with. Let me explain. In order for a person to live with the demonic delusion or obsession, he is forced to develop a whole series of coping mechanisms that aren't appropriate to the free and open life of a Christian. These coping mechanisms must be gradually unlearned. They didn't develop overnight and they seldom disappear overnight. I believe that counseling by skilled, trained, and committed Christian counselors, pastors, or laypersons can be extremely helpful to help delivered people experience full recovery. The Body of Christ is not a place where we are to judge our recovering brothers and sisters, but to love and encourage and bear with them.
23

1Th 5:14

And we urge you, brothers, warn those who are idle, encourage the timid, help the weak, be patient with everyone. NIV

24

CHAPTER SIX

Pornography (Everyones Problem)

Pornography is over an eighty billion dollar a year industry in America. Why? Sex is one of Satans greatest snares. (maybe the greatest) From Noah to Solomon, great men have fallen into the trap of sexual sin. The sin of adultery has contributed to more divorces than any other one. Adultery breaks the marriage covenant! Satan wants fathers out of the home at any cost. Satan knows the chances of children becoming a problem will increase when dad and mom split up. Satan also knows that if he can get a man to engage in pornography, he can lead him into actually committing the act. Jesus said If a man looks at a woman with lust in his heart he has already committed adultery. There was a time when you had to go to a bad neighborhood at night to find pornography. It is so easy to obtain pornography today its scary. Its on TV, radio, phone sex lines, on the Internet, in magazines, newspapers, and movies. I realize that women commit adultery also, BUT the porno industry makes over 85% of its money from MEN! There are men that have not actually committed the act of adultery...but they are obsessed with porno. I knew a man in Dover, Delaware whose wife left him because he was having an affair with porno. He wasnt having sex with her. He was however spending his time with Playboy Bunnies and Penthouse Pets in magazines. He lived in a trailer home and used the spare bedroom to store hundreds of porno magazines. Yes there are Christian men secretly viewing

porno material! Satan knows the more you scan this filth the greater the chance you will act out the sin. Is it you! David first lusted in his heart for Bathsheba as he spied her bathing herself. David was supposed to be on the battlefield with his men. Satan knows that if we are out of position or out of fellowship with the LORD we can be easily tempted. Submit yourself therefore to God; Resist the devil and he will flee. (James 4:7)

As you read the following lies, ask the Holy Spirit to help you recognize lies you may have believed. Jesus said of the Holy Spirit, "He will guide you into all truth" (John 16:13 NKJV). We've attempted to answer each lie with truth from the Bible. Lie "I'll never get free of sex addiction" Truth Jesus died on the cross so we CAN get free of whatever sin struggle we are involved in. The Holy Spirit, who raised Christ from the dead, gives life to our mortal body so we can live in freedom (Romans 8:11,13). Life through Jesus Christ brings spiritual renewal and a new nature that enables us to walk in purity, just as Jesus did (2 Corinthians 5:17). No matter how bad we may have sinned, we can still come to Jesus and receive forgiveness and cleansing. Jesus' blood covers all our sins. Hebrews 6:17-20 affirms that we have hope in Jesus, who is the anchor of our soul. See our

26

verses on hope also. "Pornography helps my marriage sex life" Pornography destroys a marriage's sex life through lust. Though it may bring a short-term pleasure, it harms your marriage by supplanting love-inspired affection with lustful gratification. Its only a matter of time before things deteriorate. Lust naturally craves more and more, so you'll find yourself looking for more exciting outlets when your spouse is unable to keep up. The enemy wants us to believe that we cannot survive and enjoy life without a diet of sin. The truth is that sinful living produces spiritual and ultimately physical death. True life begins with living according to Gods Spirit, and making no provision for sins fulfillment (Romans 13:14 , John 6:63). We CAN live without sin! When we obey God with our sex life, we will experience peace and are best able to reap the fruits of a healthy marriage (current or future). Sex is not a right given to every person, but rather, it is a gift from God to every person who marries. For those who have not married, the challenge is to trust God and wait on Him for His provision for life, marriage and sex. (See singles and sex pages) "God won't accept me because I keep falling to temptation" Satan specializes in condemnation and despair. Once he entices us to sin, he condemns us for sinning, telling us we'll never be free. He tells us we'll never be able to please God. Jesus died so that we have peace with God. God is not angry with us for sinning, and he longs for us to accept Jesus' sacrifice and live in the reality of the new life he prepared for us. Jesus bore all of God's wrath due to us for our sin (Isaiah 53:4-12; Isaiah 54:10). God will not reject us when we approach him for help. God doesn't make mistakes. He created us good, but we are corrupted from birth by the sinful nature we inherit from Adam (Romans

" I can't live without my porn" (and/or sex sin)

"God made me this way"

27

5:12). We can become enslaved to sin when we obey sin's desires (Romans 6:16). When enslaved, it's easy to blame our bondage on God. When we do this, it seems to free us from the responsibility for our sin. But, God is not to blame - we are! Steps to gaining freedom begin with taking responsibility for our sin by confessing it to God (see Freedom Journey). "Forbidden sex is more enjoyable" Forbidden sex enslaves us to lust. For a time, our forays into the forbidden may deliver pleasure, but soon we'll want more risk, more exposure, more thrill, etc., and we'll go deeper into depravity. Our own actions can bring a type of curse upon ourselves, such that we are unable to enjoy the good things God has given us. Romans 1:20-32 describes what can happen when we follow the path of depravity. Those who wait on God for their sexual needs will enjoy lasting pleasure and contentment (Psalm 36:7-9; John 4:14). God's provision meets our needs (Philippians 4:19). God gave us some very specific guidance on what kind of sex is acceptable. God restricts sex to marriage between one man and one woman (Mark 10:6-9, Genesis 2:24). Any sexual activity outside of this context is sin, which has consequences that in some cases have lifelong effects (see consequences). God also gave us specific guidance on nakedness, telling us not to reveal our sexual organs to any person other than our spouse (Habakkuk 2:14-16, Isaiah 57:8, Ezekiel 23:18). Pornography exploits nakedness, and it makes God furious! (Ezekiel 23:18). Sex is good! The Bible teaches that God created sex as a wonderful gift to be enjoyed between a man and woman in marriage. He intended it to be an intimate expression of love exclusively between a husband and wife. Consider what the Bible says about this kind of sex: "May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. A loving doe, a graceful deer--may her breasts satisfy you

"All sex is good"

"The Bible teaches that sex is dirty"

28

always, may you ever be captivated by her love. Why be captivated, my son, by an adulteress? Why embrace the bosom of another man's wife?" Proverbs 5:18-20 NIV When sex is removed from this context and/or exploited through pornography or other means, it becomes an addictive and destructive practice. See our sex page for more info. "Pornography doesn't hurt anyone" Porn damages the viewer. Proverbs 6:27 says: "Can a man scoop fire into his lap without his clothes being burned?" The implied answer is "No." Lusting after people with our eyes and thoughts is equivalent to committing the sin with them (Matthew 5:28). Porn trains us to practice lust and live in a fantasy world of evil thoughts. As a result, we burn with insatiable lust that drives us to seek gratification. The memories resulting from our porn activities can last a lifetime and damage our ability to enjoy sex in our marriage. Pornography also can lead us down the destructive path of perversion. Pedophilia, homosexuality, rape and abuse are just a few of the many possible activities that porn promotes. Porn damages the viewer's family. For example, your children could be tormented by any evil spirits that are tormenting you, or they may simply get hooked on porn when they stumble across your porn stash of computer files or magazines. Your spouse could be devastated if he/she discovers you've been committing "mental adultery" through porn. He/she may have difficulty ever trusting you again when they discover your secret life. It could take years for you to re-learn how to love your spouse and eliminate the stranglehold lust has on you. You may have to relearn how to have sex in a loving way, since you have become tuned for lust through porn. See How porn works and Why Porn is bad for more info. "Getting married will stop Marriage can make porn addiction worse, and

29

my pornography addiction"

porn addiction ruins a marriage's sex life! There are several reasons for this, but one of the key reasons is that porn addicts have sexually tuned themselves to respond to lust by porn pictures and masturbation. Married sex, by design, is to be built on love. Lust and love are total opposites! See our pages on lust and lust vs. love. The porn addict should break his addiction before getting married. Lust is the exact opposite of love. See our pages lust vs. love and lust for explanations. Lust is sin (Matthew 5:28). Lust is very harmful and is often the starting point for many other kinds of evil. 1 John 2:15-17 tells us that lust will actually prevent God's love from being in us! If we lack God's love, we are vulnerable to being filled with every other form of evil. Romans 1:2032 gives us an example of what happened when Roman Christians followed lust. They were filled with every form of evil (29-30). See our page on lust for more info. Masturbation is addictive and gives lust a foothold to control our minds. It also destroys our marriage sex life by sexually tuning us to ourselves. Masturbation teaches us nothing about loving our spouse and giving to him/her during sex. It's all about satisfying our own selfish desires. (see masturbation page) God is holy, which means perfect in goodness and righteousness. God also loves us very much. He proved his love for us by sacrificing Jesus for our sins (see God's Love). God restricted sex to marriage to protect us from the many sorrows that come with sexual sin. Sex sin brings spiritual confusion, perversion, bondage, addiction, destruction of families and a host of other possible side effects (see sex sin consequences). Sex is so powerful that it can only be safely contained in a loving marriage where there is lifelong commitment, trust and intimacy. Once we extract sex from that context, it becomes unstable and easily converts to a

"Lust is the same as love" "There is nothing wrong with lust"

"Masturbation is harmless and healthy"

"God is unfair and unloving to restrict sex to marriage."

30

lustful endeavor. "Lots of sex brings satisfaction and fulfillment" Lasting fulfillment comes from knowing God. When we follow God, He satisfies us with good things that bring lasting fulfillment (see Psalm 103:2-5, Psalm 107:9, Psalm 145:16, Psalm 36:7-9, John 4:14). Indulging in sexual sin yields lust which is a continual desire for more. Lust is a total lack of fulfillment (see lust). Whether you are engaged to be married or are thinking that you will eventually get married, the fact is that you are not yet married. The Bible is clear about sex outside of marriage being sin (1 Corinthians 6:9, 2 Corinthians 12:21, Galatians 5:19; Hebrews 13:4; Colossians 3:5, Deuteronomy 22:13-28). The consequences of pre-marital sex will include damaged intimacy in your future marriage. God is deeply concerned with what we do with our bodies, because our bodies are literally temples for his Spirit. 1 Corinthians 6:12-20 describes this special function of our bodies and how we are called to honor God by not defiling our bodies with sexual sin in particular. Sexual sin unites us spiritually with whatever we're having sex with (physically or mentally). Since God's Spirit lives in us as Christians, we dishonor our bodies and defile God's temple through our sexual sin. Keeping our bodies from sexual sin is a spiritual act of worship (Romans 12:1-2). All people have sinned and have fallen short of God's holy standard (Romans 3:23). Every minister of the Gospel has sinned at one point or another. Sex addiction does not disqualify you from being in ministry. Granted, if your ministry is causing you to fall to temptation, you should step back for a time until you have broken the bondage with God's help. Your victory over it will likely open up doors for you to help other people looking for the path to freedom. No you didnt see I John 1:9

"Pre-marital sex is OK as long as you're planning to marry the person" or "Sex is Ok as long as you are committed to one another in a monogamous relationship." "God doesn't care about what I do with my body"

"My addiction disqualifies me from Christian ministry"

"I've committed the

31

unforgivable sin" "Your body is not good enough to be sexually successful" This lie is championed by vendors of penis enlargement products, breast implants and sex drugs. While there may be legitimate needs for some of these products, too often people feel sexually inferior because they don't have the "perfect" physical setup as seen on TV or elsewhere. The enemy wants us to sabotage our enjoyment of sex by inspiring fear of failure and/or rejection from the opposite sex. This kind of performance orientation is of course promoted by pornography's typical themes like "size matters," and other nonsense. When considering sex, we can trust God that he has given us all we need to enjoy sex with our spouse. We also can ask him to help us overcome any fears we may have about sex, such that we can enjoy the full experience of sex (spiritually, emotionally and physically).

32

Biographical Data Elder Mark H. Stevens

Elder Mark H. Stevens is an ordained Elder in the COGIC 1st Ecclesiastical Jurisdiction of New Jersey. He is the Assistant Pastor of Genesis New Beginning in Christ COGIC in Camden NJ. He is the Dean of the Charles Harrison Mason Bible Institutes of New Jersey (Camden, Lakewood, and Browns Mills). Elder Stevens is married to the former Stephanie Perry, who is also a Minister of the Gospel. Elder Stevens has graduated from the Institute of Jewish Studies, a school of the Philadelphia Bible University. He is an ETA (Evangelical Training Association) certified Bible Teacher. He holds a BA in Theology and a MA in Ministry from Freedom Bible College and Seminary, and is the final stages of receiving his Doctorate in Ministry from Freedom. He is a Staff Chaplain at 2 hospitals in Southern New Jersey. He has completed 4 units of Clinical Pastoral Education and is working on becoming a Psychiatric Rehabilitation Specialist. Elder Stevens is a highly decorated retired MSgt in the USAF. He has served in Combat Operations in Somalia, Honduras, Turkey, Korea, and Morocco. He has aggressively preached and spread the Gospel of Jesus Christ in every country he set his foot in. During Desert Storm the Lord used him to lead 3 Moslems to Christ. He was also instrumental in starting the first Church of God in Christ in South Korea under the leadership of Dr. Herman G. Platt. Elder Stevens greatest joy is preparing people for the battle. Prior to accepting the call to teach and preach Elder Stevens was a Martial Arts (Tang Soo Do) instructor. God told him to quit Martial Arts two days before he was to become a 2nd Degree Black Belt! He obeyed God, and now he teaches Martial Arts for the Kingdom of God. Glory to God!

Dedicated To My Wife, Whom I Love Dearly!

Eph 1:13

And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, Eph 1:14 who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are Gods possessionto the praise of his glory.