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W W W . P U A T O N Y K I N G .

C O M









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Reversing a Break Up
By: Anthony King

puatonyking.com
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Short Notice
All right guys, first of all Ill be writing this e-book in a very informal way, much like
talking to a friend really. I hope you will bear with me while I do so because its much
more fun this way. All right lets get started then.
Let there beDarkness
We start at the beginning of the end. For whatever reason your relationship has gone
bust and one of you (or both) has decided to back out of it. Now, most of the time
both exes are hurting because of the break-up although this also has a bit to do with
what the reason was for the split.
I just want to point out that this e-book perhaps isnt so well suited to guide you to a
break-up reversal if there was any infidelity involved. Sadly, the splits that occur
because of cheating arent a part of the 90% reverse chance statistic since the hurt
was caused intentionally by one of the two partners. There is no such thing as: I
tripped, fell and landed with my penis inside her. There just aint.
So youve announced to each other that the relationship has ended and you have
said goodbye. A few days later the hurt still hasnt faded a bit and all you can think
about is your ex-partner, what theyre up to and who they are with. You decide that
you dont want to let go of your BF/GF and that you want them back. What should
you do? The immediate answer to this question is: Nothing at all. At this stage of the
split, you dont do a damn thing.
Making clear, well weighted decisions while you are hurting and feeling down is not
something that comes naturally. You let this whole relationship thing slide for a few
weeks until you get a chance to clear your mind and then draw up a plan of action.
Remember that you must allow yourself to feel hurt and feel down. If you suppress
those feelings, they will surface eventually and perhaps at a time when you least
expect it.


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Getting them back
I wont say most because I have no definite numbers, but a lot of people who want
their ex back go into this self-pity mode where they basically submit to the person
who actually ended the relationship. The result of this behavior is the pleading,
begging and displaying neediness to the other ex. This theater of emotions has the
exact opposite effect on the person you are trying to get back. While it might seem
like theyre starting to develop feelings for you again, this is a result of compassion
and pity not of genuine love or lust. In these cases the other person starts to feel like
your parent and the more you beg and plead, the more you will be perceived as the
obnoxious toddler screaming to get that candy bar in the store.
Instead, take your time to cool off. Take a week to get your head straight and make a
plan based on rational thinking and act accordingly.
Ask yourself why you want to get back together with that person. Is it because your
ex is now out of reach for you? Is it true love or just the feeling of comfort and
security that youve had in your long term commitment? If you just came out of a
relationship that has been full of arguments and mental suffocation you might
actually want to re-evaluate your intentions of making up again to save yourself
heartache afterwards.
The initial step to getting your ex back should be getting over what once was. Dont
stick to the past waiting for miracles to happen because they wont. You need to
demonstrate that you are an open minded and confident individual, someone who is
not going to draw himself back from existence because of a minor setback in life. Be
active, go out and enjoy yourself, hang around with friends and make some new
ones. This will boost your confidence level and give you a positive mindset that will
make your ex to not only appreciate you more, but also want them to get back
together with you.




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Re-Initiate contact
At this point a few weeks or maybe a month have gone by, you have allowed yourself
and your ex the space and time to cool off and get your heads together. Its time to
play. You want to re-initiate contact with your ex and I dont blame you, but how you
act from here on will basically decide the outcome of your journey to making up.
One or two wrong sentences might mean the difference between complete success
and hopeless failure. The main thing to keep in mind is that while communicating with
your ex, there must always be this mutual agreement present that your relationship is
over while it is over. Trust me on this, I am not exaggerating.
I explained previously not to act like an obnoxious toddler after the break-up, well its
time to implement this strategy. You must not show any sign of neediness to your ex-
partner and show no signs of desperation once you start talking to them again. No
matter what the other says, be mature and casual about it. When you disagree on
something, the worst thing you can do is start an argument. Whats the point, youre
exes anyway!
One thing that is worth to remember is that even though your ex might have ended
the relationship, chances are that he/she still cares very deeply for you provided that
you didnt do anything to hurt them or cause any harm. Think of this when talking to
them and use it in your favor.
Another thing you can use to help you is positive (mutual) memories. When you head
out to meet them (dont use the word date), make sure you go to a spot that you both
are familiar with. Also make sure that the spot you are going to has really positive
memories linked to it by the both of you. It might be where you first kissed, or where
some other pleasant event has occurred in the past. *wink*
During the first encounter after the break-up, you will want to show your ex that you
are still the person he/she fell in love with in the first place. This is something you
want to demonstrate to them, not tell them. Listen to what they say and respond to it,
dont just nod your head and switch over to some subject that matters to you.
Showing that you dont care will push them away even more and this time you wont
be able to repair the damage.
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If the ex has any second thoughts about going to that spot you both cherished, dont
start asking questions, why, what, how etc. Be mature about it and propose
something else thats light and fun like going for a cappuccino or play mini-golf or be
silly and take him/her bowling. In this case also skip deep conversations; if they didnt
want to come along to the special place, they arent ready to engage in
conversations about your relationship or a possible getting back together either.
Dont tell the ex that you miss them since neither of you should have the upper
hand in the process, equal is best. Flirting is a big no-no since you are now officially
friends and putting pressure on each other to deal with innuendos might work
against you.
Its perfectly fine to talk about the past times and bring up memories of the things you
did when you were together. Memories from vacations or trips seem to work best.
Also, by their reaction to this, you will be able to judge whether they still care about
you or not. The reason I keep telling you what you should NOT do is because so
many people make these mistakes and really ruin their own chances of success.
Hopefully its needless to say that when going to meet your ex for the first time since
break up, you will be well groomed, well dressed and look like the person they would
like to be seen with. Even if you dont mention this to them they will think it.
Remember that your presentation is also a part of your communication towards your
ex-partner.
A positive mindset is really important in a situation like this. People have this
miraculous ability to pick up on each others energy and even if this ability works
better for women, men also have it. If you are sitting there, just chitchatting with your
ex but inside thinking thisll never work, be sure that it wont because you have a
negative mindset and this can be perceived through your posture, conversation and
the tonality of your voice without you even being aware of it.
Ask yourself: Can I contribute to this relationship and make it work? Have I changed?
Am I a better person than I was when we broke up? If you can answer yes to these
questions then you should have very little difficulty conveying this to your ex-partner
through your non-verbal communication, your posture and behavior.

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Someone else
If your ex-partner lets you know that they have started seeing someone else, the last
thing you want to do is freak out, make a scene and leave. The bad impression youd
leave behind would haunt you forever. Try to stay sober of anger or jealousy and
remember. Be mature about it! Feel free to ask them if they feel that they have found
inner peace in their current situation. The answers from these types of questions will
reveal a whole lot about their feelings as well.
Keep in mind also that your ex might bring up someone else just to see your reaction
or even to make you jealous. While this is a very bad tactic it is being used frequently
for all kinds of reasons. Sadly, it only results in more heartache and you should
neither play along with it by trying to return the favor, or feed into it with anger.
While it is good for you to go out, meet new people and just have fun in general,
starting to date someone else might send mixed signals to your ex. On one hand you
are talking sweet to them and on the other hand you are seeing someone else, this
just doesnt add up and will decrease your odds of getting them back.
Ok so at this point you have cooled off from your break up, you have worked on your
self-improvement a bit, you have made contact with your ex and demonstrated that
you are not needy, clingy or jealous. You have also shown that you can go out with
your ex to do something casual and fun with no pressure and finally youve shown a
high level of maturity towards both the person which is your ex, and the situation
between the two of you. Good, you are on your way! Now its time to introduce:







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The Relationship Conversation
There will come a time in the process where the inevitable will happen; the step
where you go from light fun and conversation, to more serious relationship talk both
about the past and the future.
The secret here is to motivate your ex to start participating in the conversation so that
it doesnt become a one way traffic, apologizing and excusing yourself type of thing.
When you engage in the more serious talk, its totally fine to express regret for the
bad things that have happened. At the same time try asking the ex what they think
were the contributing factors to your break up. This of course stops being a valid
question if there was one clear reason for you not being together anymore. If this is
the case, address this issue and let them talk about it. Dont argument against, listen.
If you personally were the main reason for your break-up, dont be shy to apologize
and admit your fault. Pride will make your ego grow but wont keep you warm at
night. Even if your ex-partner is partially responsible for the trouble that caused you
to grow apart, dont try to put the blame on them, avoid the classic mistake people
make I am sorry but this will significantly reduce the sincerity of your apologize.
Remember, you can only apologize for yourself, not for anyone else. It wouldnt be
wise to have any expectation regarding the other person.
One thing that works particularly well with break-up / make-up situations is re-feeding
the ex the feelings they had during the break-up. To give an example:
I am sorry about how I acted, you must have felt hurt/isolated but I hope
you can appreciate that it was never my intention to cause you any
harm. Im really going to start paying attention to the people around me
to make sure this doesnt happen again
This line is almost magic if delivered with certain sincerity and frankly, if this doesnt
make your ex respond in a warm(er) manner, youre probably better off without them.
If your strategy works and you do get back together, have a long and calm
conversation about what exactly didnt work previously. This will make sure that you
wont repeat your mistakes and waste time investing in a bond that wont work out in
the end.
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Short conversational lesson
Note: This extra chapter will briefly explain one basic conversational technique that
might give you an (unfair) edge in achieving your objective. The technique explained
will only work if you havent had any contact or encounter with your ex for at least a
few weeks since break-up.
Mimicking
This is a very powerful way to quickly build report (a sense of comfort) with a stranger
or someone you havent talked to in a while. The technique, when performed
successfully, will give the other person a sense of knowing you better or connecting
with you on a deeper level than with most people.
Implementation takes some practice but is fairly easy to master.
The concept of mimicking is to, with some subtlety; imitate the other persons non-
verbal communication. This is the part where it gets tricky: the art of it is to do it in
such a way that the other person will not consciously pick up on your mimicking. The
subconscious mind of your ex will pick up on this behavior and youll find them
becoming more and more comfortable as the conversation progresses. If you have
mastered the technique all the way your ex will actually start to miss your presence
when the date is over.
A rule of thumb is to let 20-25 seconds pass before making the mimicking move in
order to not be discovered while staying inside the time frame for them to pick it up.
Practice makes perfect so perhaps it would be wise to try this on some strangers
before applying on your ex.





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Final Word
You should now have a good understanding of how to re-initiate and maintain contact
with your ex-partner, and how to work towards a reversal of your break-up.
A word of warning (again) would be to re-evaluate the reasons for your desire to get
back together. Analyze the issues that caused the break-up and ask yourself if you
are prepared to work on not having these issues repeated in the future. Do you still
love your ex or do you want to get back together because you need to satisfy your
own pride and/or ego?
This was my short contribution to your endeavor. I truly hope that youve found this
information useful and that it has helped you achieve the goal of regaining the
happiness you had with your partner.
If you should have any questions regarding this material or the website in general,
dont hesitate to contact me on:
tonyking84@live.com

For a much more in-depth, step by step strategy on how to get your ex-partner back
within a matter of days please visit:
http://www.getyourextowantyouback.org

All the best,
Anthony King
http://www.puatonyking.com




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