Professional Documents
Culture Documents
Taylor
Stress Relief
For
Your Happiness
The Easy Key to Serenity
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Table of Contents
I. REFOCUSING YOUR THOUGHTS .......................................................................................................1 A. B. C. D. A. B. C. D. HOW DOES YOUR BODY EXPRESS STRESS TO YOU?...............................................................................1 RECOGNIZE YOUR MESSAGE IN YOUR BODY ..........................................................................................1 STRESS AND PHYSICAL SYMPTOMS .........................................................................................................1 USING THE POWER OF REFOCUSING!.......................................................................................................1 EVEN HAPPY EVENTS CAN FEEL STRESSFUL ..........................................................................................2 DURING STRESS WE CAN ACCIDENTALLY LOWER OUR OXYGEN LEVELS .............................................2 BREATHING EXERCISE .............................................................................................................................3 IMAGINE A PEACEFUL SCENE ..................................................................................................................3
III. ENCOURAGING SELF-TALK.............................................................................................................3 A. WE ARE BORN WITH NO OPINION ABOUT OURSELVES ...........................................................................3 B. APPRECIATE YOUR ABILITIES AND TALENTS ..........................................................................................4 C. MANAGE YOUR STRESS BY TALKING NICELY ABOUT YOURSELF TO YOURSELF ....................................4 IV. SIMPLIFY YOUR ROUTINE ...............................................................................................................5 A. B. C. D. MAKE YOUR SPACE LESS STRESSFUL ..................................................................................................5 WE CREATE HABITS BY REPEATING THE SAME ACTION ........................................................................5 CHOOSE SOMETHING SIMPLE AND BEGIN................................................................................................5 SMILE AS YOU REMIND AND REWARD YOURSELF ..................................................................................6
V. RESPECT YOURSELF AND OTHERS ................................................................................................6 A. CHOICE NUMBER ONE .............................................................................................................................6 B. CHOICE NUMBER TWO ............................................................................................................................6 C. CHOICE NUMBER THREE .........................................................................................................................7 VI. EXPECT REASONABLE LIMITS OF YOURSELF..........................................................................7 A. YOU ARE DESIGNED TO ACT BY REASONABLE LIMITS............................................................................8 B. BE A PEOPLE SERVER INSTEAD OF A PEOPLE PLEASER ...........................................................................8 VII. FINDING YOUR INNER PEACEFULNESS .....................................................................................9 A. PEACEFUL RELAXATION IS IN YOUR MIND .............................................................................................9 B. YOUR INNER UNLIMITED RESOURCES .....................................................................................................9 C. SIMPLE STEPS TO YOUR INNER PEACEFULNESS.......................................................................................9 VIII. BE GENTLE ON YOURSELF..........................................................................................................10 A. B. C. D. E. ARE YOU EVERYTHING TO EVERYONE? ...............................................................................................10 ONLY SUPER HEROES CAN FLY.............................................................................................................10 WHO SAID SO? ......................................................................................................................................11 WHAT WOULD YOU DO FOR YOUR CHILD?..........................................................................................11 THINK GENTLE THOUGHTS ....................................................................................................................11
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X. IMPORTANT HORMONES FOR STRESS RELIEF AND WELL BEING....................................14 A. OXYTOCIN - BLISSFUL HORMONE FOR FEMININE STRESS RELIEF .........................................................14 1. What Oxytocin is...............................................................................................................................14 2. Oxytocin Stimulators ........................................................................................................................14 3. Ways for a Woman to create Oxytocin .............................................................................................15 4. Why Give a Woman Oxytocin? (i.e., Whats in it for me?) ..............................................................17 5. Ways for a Lover to Give a Woman Oxytocin ..................................................................................17 6. How Not to Give Oxytocin................................................................................................................20 B. TESTOSTERONE AWESOME HORMONE FOR MALE STRESS RELIEF .....................................................20 1. What Testosterone is.........................................................................................................................20 2. Testosterone Stimulators ..................................................................................................................20 3. Ways for a Man to create Testosterone ............................................................................................21 4. Why Give a Man Testosterone? (i.e., Whats in it for me?) .............................................................22 5. Ways for a Lover to Give a Man Testosterone .................................................................................23 6. How Not to Give Testosterone..........................................................................................................23 XI. SUMMARY ............................................................................................................................................25 XII. ABOUT THE AUTHOR......................................................................................................................25
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Past a few small similarities, every persons physical reaction to stress is completely individual. Some of us feel our stress in the tightness of our neck and shoulders, some in our stomach, some by an extra half dozen bathroom visits. The list could be endless. Your bodys telling you something is not right. Your body is literally sending you a message calling out to you for help. Will you improve your health and reduce your stress by recognizing your bodys stress as a call for help? Here are simple and powerful things you can choose to do
B.
I do not know a single person (or married person, for that matter) who is completely stress free. Daily, every persons body expresses stress in its own way. Do you continually do nothing to relieve the stress your body expresses? Is there danger for you in taking no action to relieve stress? Your body is capable of processing a larger, louder stress message (perhaps an illness), when you ignore your health and wellness.
C.
Yes, some stresses may be around you, in ways which are beyond your control to change. You may have a loved one who is ill, or may even be stressed by some of the good things in life! Getting married and moving are both happy AND stressful. You cannot hope to control every stressful thing in your work, family and personal relationships. So, how about beginning now to regularly DO WHAT YOU CAN DO to relieve stress?
D.
Close your eyes and focus your mind on the places where stress is expressing itself. Accept and acknowledge the feelings in your body which you are experiencing. Many tasks, challenges or difficulties may have caused stressful
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B.
We maintain life within when we breathe in life-giving oxygen. After we breathe in life-giving oxygen, we need to breathe out life taking carbon dioxide. When we breathe shallowly, we are breathing in less oxygen than when we breathe diaphragmatically. From birth, we are designed to breathe very efficiently from the diaphragm. But somewhere along the way, many of us forget how to breathe naturally. Natural breathing is breathing from the diaphragm rather than in shallow, short bursts. Sometimes when we feel excited, that's actually stressful to the body. Simply by deeply inhaling and then exhaling, we will begin to balance our breathing rhythm. When we balance our breathing rhythm we actually increase our oxygen intake. When we nourish our bodys cells with life-giving oxygen, everything runs more smoothly.
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Imagine that your lungs are like two balloons. Put your hands about where your kidneys are on your back, palms against your skin. This may be easier for you to do sitting down. Breathe in deeply from the diaphragm. Inhale deeply in such a way that you can actually feel, using the palms of your hands on top of your kidney area, your back expand and then relax. That is diaphragmatic breathing. As babies we naturally breathe diaphragmatically. When we get older, somehow we forget about breathing the best way for us. When you feel excited, such as in the example of this article, one of the best things you can do for yourself is to remember to slowly and calmly diaphragmatically breathe.
D.
Along with diaphragmatically breathing, imagine a peaceful scene in your mind. Perhaps this is a favorite vacation plays that you actually visited. Maybe this is an imaginary happy place you're making up right on the spot. It could be that this mind image is a picture you saw in a magazine that seemed very calm and relaxing to you. Whatever the scene in your mind is, make it a peaceful one. Notice that you feel very calm and in control in this mind image, and that you are diaphragmatically breathing. If you intentionally choose to act out the calm image you see in your mind, you can easily manage your stress.
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B.
You are a unique person. Nobody else has your talents for being you. In the world, you might meet people with self-serving opinions. People with self-serving opinions might try to convince others about their superiority over others. If you hear somebody trying to tell you that nobody appreciates you, and you choose to feel stressed out about it, remember youre merely hearing a story. Remember, insecure people actually have no authority to dictate the terms of someone elses life. If you hear an unbelievable story about your personal value from someone else, you are free to make up a self-approving story about you. It's always much more enjoyable to like yourself than it is to believe the ridiculous rantings of an insecure person.
C.
Here's a technique I use myself when I hear other people try to convince me I am unacceptable for some reason. I hear their story, then I recall some of my accomplishments. As I focus on my accomplishments, I talk to myself. I say respectful ideas like, Remember when you learned how to tie your shoes? You came into this world knowing only how to smile, how to cry and mess in your diapers. Look at how far you have come! Im proud to be awesome. I feel happy to be me."
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B.
Yes, we humans live by habit. Once we learn something we tend to repeat it in same way, unless we have a reason to learn another method. Habits feel comfortable. Mostly, we like and just accept our habits as normal. People naturally resist change. So, how do we change without feeling uncomfortable?
C.
Begin one step at a time. If you have clutter on the kitchen or bathroom counter, a stack of shoes at the front door, and more just choose one thing to change! Does one sound too small if you have tried to change your habits before and failed? Start by letting go of any unhelpful beliefs you might have that changing your routine is too much for you to manage. Actually, if you focus on changing just one part of a clutter cycle, you can surprise yourself. This is how you start a new helpful habit - with just one step in the direction you want to go!
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You could decide you are going to focus on putting your shoes inside the hall closet. Maybe just putting your toiletries away off the bathroom counter would be helpful. You can set up a file for monthly bills rather than seeing them spread out on the kitchen counter every day. Decide it will be easy. Choose just one. Tape a sign or picture to the place where you want to keep whatever you are putting away. Make this reminder a happy face, or Over Here! sign, or a beautiful bouquet of flowers. Youll smile and feel rewarded every time you take that extra step for yourself. Taking charge of your surroundings will feel great. Changes that make you feel happy will become easier and easier for you. Other people may even notice a change in you, and ask what your secret is!
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You know those one size fits all t-shirts? That usually means the size is just up to extra large. Well, can you imagine a 5X size person fitting into a one size fits all t-shirt? That may be an unreasonable expectation. There is value recognizing there is actually no such thing as one size fits all. If there was truth to one size fits all, the entire world would only be colored one color. We would only eat one food. There would only be one type of house in which to live. How boring! Do you think you are supposed to be a one size fits all type of person? Remember that no one can be all things to all people at all times, and thats OK
B.
Do you know the difference between serving people and pleasing people? Serving people means you know when to use the word no. You feel comfortable establishing standards or boundaries and sticking to them. One of those standards is only doing things that you are ethically comfortable doing. When you decide ahead of time what your standards are, you can stick to them. Then, when you get into worldly situations you have a guide book. Having a guide book provides structure of what you prefer. If somebody asks you to violate your standards you already know what you are going to choose to do. The world contains people who act very demanding. They are very driven in their goals. This is a great quality unless the drive excessively requests others to act at their own unnecessary expense. If you do something at your unnecessary expense you demonstrate the behavior of a people pleaser. If you please people at your own expense you stop your own personal development. Doing actions which you know are wrong, is stressful. To manage this type of stress, choose to be a people server instead of a people pleaser. Doing so, you expect and act according to reasonable limits of yourself. You know what your healthy limits are.
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Stress Relief for Your Happiness VII. Finding Your Inner Peacefulness
A. Peaceful Relaxation IS in Your Mind
You have a wonderful knowledge and natural gift inside yourself that you may not have used yet. Deep inside you is a huge pool of calm, understanding and connection with peace. Yet your conscious mind may always seem, or feel stressed, to you. Are you too busy sorting details, accomplishing tasks, or trying to stay on schedule, to ever experience your own inner peace? The gift of peace, acceptance and much more is already inside you. Heres how to touch it, to feel it
B.
Below the busy surface layer of your conscious mind lies your peaceful pool of inner calm, and truthful knowledge. Deep inside you, past your thoughts, memories and internal criticisms is unlimited love, support and acceptance. We all have needs, and we all have wonderful inner resources. Once you begin thinking about that peaceful place inside you, feeling that peacefulness is just a few steps away.
C.
It is very likely that after reading these steps just once, you will remember them, and quickly move towards your own peacefulness. The following steps are very simple and easy to repeat. Use them whenever you want to experience deep relaxation. (Remember; never use this type of relaxation process while operating machinery of any kind!) 1. Find a comfortable position in which to sit or lie down for a few minutes on your own 2. Close your eyes (so its easy for you to focus inside) 3. Breathe five deep, calming breaths, focusing on becoming completely aware of all the feelings in your physical body 4. With each and every long, slow breath you inhale, you notice yourself relaxing more and more
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B.
Have you looked at your expectations lately? Without a bulletproof suit, or a jet rocket pack, why are you willing to take on far more than feels good, to take care of everything? Even if you do look good in lycra, where is your super human strength going to come from? Give yourself permission to rest your jets.
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Who said you were responsible for everything? Did you actually agree, or did you just fall into doing too much? Write a list of what others want of you. Write a list of what you want from yourself. Are they the same? Are they too much? Cross off everything not essential to living air, food, water and shelter. Look at each other item. What is your reward for doing all the other tasks? See a way to lessen the time you have promised to others.
D.
Maybe a lot of the things you do are for others. You love them and want the best for them dont you? Why would you want less for yourself? What about the child in you? What would you do to show love, support and encouragement to your young child? In the Spring go in the garden and make mud pies then decorate them with twigs, and leaves and grass! In the Summer - go outside and run through the sprinklers, walk in your bare feet In the Autumn go play and jump in a huge pile of leaves In the Winter go make snowmen or snow angels Be patient with yourself Forgive yourself for only being human Approve of yourself the way you are right now Appreciate your special talents Celebrate the progress you have made so far Give yourself a hug
E.
Reduce stress by choosing to think gentle thoughts. Focusing on negative thoughts and feelings such as anger, judgment, fear or worry will just get you more of the same. Instead, practice switching to gentle neutral or positive thoughts. The more you do this, the more your mind will do it automatically.
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A.
Laugh at Yourself
We all have done unexpected things. If we accept that life can be funny, we reduce stress. A well known magazine publishes a column called Laughter the Best Medicine. They know what many of us know. Laughing is a great stress reducer.
B.
Each of us demonstrates the ability to think any thought we choose to think. Because we all can think chosen thoughts, I encourage you to laugh every day.
C.
A New Yorker and a Californian were traveling by air from New York to California. They sat by each other on the long flight. The Californian asked the New Yorker, So, where in California are you traveling to today? The New Yorker said, I am going to San Joesay. The Californian chuckled. The New Yorker furrowed his brow. Whats so funny? The Californian said Well, out there they pronounce the J as an H, so the city is pronounced San Hosay. The New Yorker said Oh, I see. The Californian said So how long to do plan to stay? The New Yorker said, Oh, until Hune or Huly.
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It is a physical fact that if you laugh, or even just really smile broadly, you will change your chemical production. The University of Edinburghs website http://micro.magnet.fsu.edu/micro/gallery/endorphin/endorphins.html confirms laughing releases endorphins. So, science has shown if you smile or laugh wide enough to crinkle the corners of your eyes, youll produce endorphins for yourself. Endorphins are also a natural painkiller. So do yourself a favor watch a funny movie, or intentionally think of something funny. Remember the last time you laughed so hard your eyes teared. Laugh, and feel great!
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Stress Relief for Your Happiness X. Important Hormones for Stress Relief and Well Being
A. Oxytocin - Blissful Hormone for Feminine Stress Relief
The hormone oxytocin reduces stress in a woman and is the hormone of well being for a woman. Oxytocin feels good to a man, doesnt reduce stress and in high amounts will put him to sleep. Women are tired not because they have too much to do, but because they do not have enough oxytocin to cope with stress.
1. What Oxytocin is
The love and bonding hormone: tending and befriending Involved in childbirth and lactation Creates orgasms (for both men and women)
2. Oxytocin Stimulators
Anything nurturing, pampering, sharing, caring, befriending Rest (as a nurturing activity) Communication Safety Cleanliness Beauty and aesthetics Trust Teamwork Shared responsibility Consistency Compliments Affection Virtue Support Cooperation Collaboration Group efforts Routine, rhythm, and regularity
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6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 24.
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a)
Shell want sex or be much more interested in sex. Shell be happier and more content. You can take credit for making her happy.
b)
happy.
Relative or friend
Shell be happier and more content. If you like, you can take credit for making her
c)
Boss or co-worker
Shell be more productive. Shell be happier and more content, so less issues around the office.
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B.
1. What Testosterone is
Men normally have 20 to 30 times more testosterone and need for testosterone than women It is the principle male sex hormone, determines a mans sexual characteristics, dominance, emotional and physical strength, body shape, hairiness, deep voice, odor, and sexual performance. Also related to assertiveness and drive, competitiveness, creativity, intellect, ability to frame and execute new ideas. Affects general health, helps to develop strong muscles and bones. Acute stress can increase testosterone significantly causing aggression. Chronic stress reduces testosterone significantly, characterized by withdrawal, irritability and depression.
2. Testosterone Stimulators
Goal setting Competition
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Adapted from Why Mars and Venus Collide by Dr. John Gray.
a)
b)
Relative or friend
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Hell be more productive. Hell be happier and more content, so less issues around the office.
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There are many components to achieving success with stress. Its important to keep learning and to find mentors. These are the easy keys to stress relief for your soul.
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Achieve this even Faster When You have All the Tools for Every Situation
By Beverly E. Taylor
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