NIST Parents Advice

On how to raise children in Bangkok

Comments from 109 NIST Parents September 2012

Content:
1. 2. 3. 4. Greatest benefits of raising children in Bangkok Greatest concerns/struggles when it comes to raising children in Bangkok Experiences, tips, and strategies that can help you raise your child in Bangkok Feedback from parents who have moved to Bangkok from another country a. The most significant changes that affected them and their children b. How they adjusted to these changes

What is the greatest benefit of raising kids in Bangkok?

They are surrounded by the rich culture of the Thai people. Thais have great respect for their elders and good manner too NIST, IB, friends from many countries Great schools, fantastic weather, local and regional travel, the sheer number and affordability of activities. Higher standard of education. Exposing him to different cultures. Becoming more independent. Being in a multicultural society, having more time with the children, lots to do and see. To acknowledge of diversity. Chance to meet people from all over the world, having different culture or back ground. Great school, learning Thai language, and great communities to plug in to. Exposure to other cultures. There are lots, including: building confidence, some "street smarts," and empathy for those less fortunate who feel obliged to resort to the sex (or other) trade to survive or beg for money on the streets. Also, lots of multi-cultural exposure and savvy about public transportation and general navigation in a big city. Diversity of people, home help, swimming pools, excursions relatively inexpensive. The excellent schools, hospitals and opportunity to participate in extracurricular activities. The only reason I have remained in Bangkok for as long as I have (3 years) is because I think that NIST is an outstanding school and I feel hesitate to move my child from the school. One suggestion that I would make is to allow children to be able to access the school grounds more freely after school hours. It is comforting for parents to be able to give their children some freedom in a controlled and safe environment. (Not referring to ECA's) but rather use of the library, playground, etc. Family friendly environment for such a very large city; Thais still nurture a traditional sense of family i.e. respect for elders and the like and i enjoy my child being surrounded and influenced by that kind of a culture much of which has been lost in the "western world", great food, lots of things to do from sports to languages to eating; most importantly, the children enjoy it because of all of the above i.e. friendly Thai culture, activities, food, friends, relative safety for such a large city at least in the Sukhumit area Different cultures - exposed to many things and many people. Lots to do, safer city than most. Different opportunities: hearing new languages and easier access to swimming. Most developed city in Thailand. Various education choices Expanding their understanding of the world. Safety relative to many other cities. Good educational opportunities. They are experiencing a new culture, we have home help and more time to spend with them. Understanding other cultures when moving with classmates and adopting to the environment.
1 NIST COUNSELING - October 2012

Domestic help and good international schools with teachers from all over the world. The kids get to attend international school, whereas back home, they were attending national school with national syllabus. Good food, nice people and flexible lifestyle. We are originally from south Asia so used to the weather. Also many different nationalities here. The kids growing up in a multicultural environment. Also very close to home. Kids can visit their grandparents quite easily. Acquire an way of international thinking, different languages from his own and protecting himself from danger. To be able to meet so many cultures in one place and that you can do so many different things (like water sports, tennis, golf, basketball), to travel to different places and the variety to eat NIST is a great help! What could the children do without school in Bangkok?! For us is a benefit to be able to start school so early here, back home, we start at age of 7 but anyway the school is not too much school - in our opinion children should be able to be children as long as possible and it seems that in NIST they have opportunity to play but they still learn every time something. Multi-cultural city, easy to get around the city, lots of things to do for children, healthier environment than our last posting. Since my entire family is here, i get help from them once in a while to keep an eye on her and make sure she is safe while we are not around. Bangkok has everything that the big city can offer. Cultural Diversity. Multilingual. Being exposed to such a diverse environment and enriching cultures is a great benefit. They meet children from all over the world and are very excepting of their sameness and differences. The international children are very welcoming of each other and it is a very good base for later on in life especially as the world become more international. The children also understand the changes in their life and a very understanding of the good and bad times that sometime happen. I guess developing street smarts at a young age. Exposure to an Asian way of life. Exposure to such a wide range of cultures in an overall friendly and safe large city. Living in central Bangkok, near BTS/MRT in a comfortable home, is very convenient for dayto-day cosmopolitan lifestyle. It's also convenient for travel to other places in Thailand and internationally - especially to visit neighbouring countries in the region. Many things/services, apart from school fees, are inexpensive in BKK compared with home country. The general quality of life. Friendly people, diverse, multi-cultural and with a great climate. Having home help, being in such an amazing multi-cultural environment, Asian travel opportunities.
2 NIST COUNSELING - October 2012

Multiple cultural experience. Studying at international school. Experiencing diverse persons and their cultures. More hi-tech appliances being used in daily life. More chance to get in touch with international lifestyle and culture. Thai culture; food; people - exposure to a different way of life and mentality. Many wonderful things like access to beaches etc. The calibre of the schools. That our children are NOT RACISTS!!!! 1. Accepting others as for who/what they are/what they look like/what they believe in.... very important - 2. being able to speak/practice many languages 3. Even when there are challenges sometimes in Bangkok, being flexible. Ability to travel as we are close to many different countries. Experiencing different cultures and learning so many new things. Diversity. The education my boys are getting at NIST is perhaps the greatest benefit that I know my boys will one day appreciate. Personally, I feel that the fact our kids won't drive a car while we live here gives me tremendous peace of mind and better night sleep! Multicultural. The greatest benefit is that kids can learn how to live in a big city with mixed cultures from different part of the world. It has both pros and cons that kids must learn how to make use of the pros and avoid or reduce the negative impacts of the cons in order to enjoy life in Bangkok. All the opportunities that are offered. And, an education like NIST! An education like this would be unaffordable in our home country. Being able to go away for nice weekends to great places like Dolphin Bay etc. Perhaps that they can be more independent because of the BTS. From the real estate agent we heard that Bangkok is considered safe. Not like Manila where the fear of kidnapping is acute. Lovely weather, good school, nice country Multi-cultural environment where kids still can experience Thai culture. Exposure to many different cultures. My kids have been exposed to so many different people, places, and ideas. Our family has grown so much from this experience! Diversity of cultures and languages. Overall sense of safety and freedom not to mention exposure to a myriad of activities and cultures. Having teenagers here, There is some freedom they wouldn't have at home, they can go by public transport, not at night, but they are able to travel on it during the day. I don't see any benefit to raising kids exclusively in Bangkok. I believe that some years in Bangkok, however, would greatly complement education in a mix of countries. In a few years I'd like to move somewhere completely different (1st world with 4 distinct seasons) to give them a fuller view of the world. Mix of Asian cultures and energy of the people in the city. Speed of growth in the developing country.
3 NIST COUNSELING - October 2012

Gosh, so many benefits, it's hard to say briefly. The city is full of life. It's fun and entertaining. The streets are filled with valuable lessons for children. There are the street vendors selling many different foods and other items. There's the motorbike and tuk tuk culture. There are the lonely hearts bars and massage parlours. There are the disabled and child beggars. The street life provides so many opportunities to talk with children about important social issues. These opportunities would not present themselves back home. We believe the discussions we have with our son about what he sees on the streets provide invaluable lessons for him as he grows into a person. Being so close to beaches, which is great encounter with nature. Community, having relatives around. Convenience of city living at its best. Also its safe compared to most major Asian cities. Great opportunity to be exposed to Thai culture, language, people. Exposure to other kinds of families, nationalities etc. The demeanour of Thai people. In general they are very nice and polite. Many opportunities for exciting after school activities. Access to a diversity of food, music, sports, educational opportunities Living amid the Thai culture and seeing and meeting people from all over the world. The great schools available and the fact that the children grow up in an international environment where they learn to respect other cultures and religions and "being different" is normal. They gain a much wider horizon of experiences by living abroad. International, variety & independent. The multi-cultural aspect and the many influences he can grasp. He learns so many things he never would have learned at home. Good school like NIST. Exposure to another way of life and a variety of cultures. The greatest benefit of raising kids in Bangkok is that they are studying in an IB atmosphere which moulds your child's all-round performance and makes them prepare for future challenges in Universities all over the world. They become more westernised, open minded, adjustable, not sentimentally bound, daring, and practicable. Relatively safe. No sexual harassment of girls In Bangkok we can see all walks of life in a place where differences are accepted. It is an opportunity for them to see what is possible, and if they are really thinking, they will also see how privileged they are and the opportunities that are open to them to prosper and to help others. You can find everything in Bangkok, both good as bad... Multi-cultural society, has a good mix of east and west. It is a progressive society and finally this city has a character and lives on the edge - a healthy mix Access to excellent (though expensive) education and opportunities to interact with international community. Maids, who can run after them from A to B and back all day long. Everything! Nice people, international environment, everything is on offer!
4 NIST COUNSELING - October 2012

Most Thai people love kids and this means they are not treated with hostility in restaurants or shops and there is usually someone who will lend a helping hand with children if needed. Exposure to other cultures. Lots of opportunities for activities that fit a child's need or interest. Support/counseling available if needed (not just at school). International/getting to know many cultures/understanding different opinions and beliefs. Cosmopolitan city, good international school and community. Bigger exposure to the world, seeing different cultures and races, better view of the society and finding the balance among all the differences. Multi-cultural, cosmopolitan view of the world. Great public transport. Lots for them to do. Experiencing the rich culture of the country. Best of east and west. NIST giving the opportunity to meet children from around the world, exposure to different cultures, ideas, visions. Bigger space accommodation, a good choice of schools, a safe city for her to go out alone. There are excellent schools. Excellent medical care. It is very safe (personal safety) and the public transportation to main shopping areas is good. Teens can get around easily on their own. Bangkok is very centrally located, making it easy to travel anywhere.

5 NIST COUNSELING - October 2012

What is your greatest concern/struggle when it comes to raising your children in Bangkok?
Navigating the traffic, and lack of pedestrian, bicycle and motorbike safety. Unless you have a driver to cart your kids everywhere, there aren't any safe (from traffic) ways for the kids to get around. I still am appalled that so many teachers and parents think it is OK for their kids to ride on the back of the motorbikes WITHOUT helmets on the way to school every day!!!!! The lack of sidewalks so that one can't even walk make Bangkok challenging. Drugs and the wrong company. Knowing where they are and what they're up to outside of home and school. Not having an after school job to earn pocket money. Easy for them to lose sight of the value of money. Bad traffic, difficult to organize play dates during the week. Not so much activities available for kids in the weekend. Less freedom compered to home country. Biggest concern = how to allow teenagers to socialize safely on weekend evenings in the big city; can't keep them locked at home but, whether to trust their judgement on where they are going and with whom, or monitor their every move and thus not foster responsibility for self and build trust. We opt for the former but sometimes I wonder if we are being lax... Elite children who can have everything - I-pods, phones etc. difficult to teach value of money They are service children - everything can be done for them cheaply e.g. sewing up hems on jeans 20 baht on street, therefore 'why learn, when you can support someone who needs it, is the answer I get! Outdoor activities generally limited to early morning , late afternoon because of heat. The easy purchase of cigarettes and alcohol by children with seemingly little restriction. Making the right friends that will influence in a positive way. Our main concern is to be on the computer all the time. Personal talk is gone, playing outside is gone, writing skill is completely gone. It is always a struggle to make them close their computer. Too much exposure. Would like them to be independent, with good attitude & behaviour. Main concern in Bangkok would be the easy access to alcohol. Even though my child doesn't drink or go out much. I have friends children who even though in YR 11,12,13 go drinking on weekends. Obviously the main concern is the abundant nightlife that is very obvious in this city (even walking in the Sukhumvit area with the kids becomes arduous). Nothing in particular apart from Traffic and Fresh Air Knowing where my children are at all times. Making sure my children grow up with a work ethic. i.e. Help around the house not just rely on maids. Computer sites and content- I have been through the Facebook stage and explained pictures, comments etc. can come back at you later and affect job placement etc. Trying to get my children to understand money does not grow on trees!!!!

1 NIST COUNSELING - October 2012

Confidence that he is safe when he is out. Managing the availability of drugs and alcohol. Access to taxis when it is late or raining. Other parenting habits do not match the general 'North American' style in the community where we lived so, it takes some getting used to the 'liberal', 'hands off' parenting style some families have chosen to adopt. Not from a "but everyone else is doing it" but from a "appropriate, like minded friendship" perspective. Because we are "expats" and spoiling our children more than you would do back home (maid, help at home minimized, facilities of doing short or long holidays, shopping facilities and being able to get false papers or getting out of certain situations more easily because being a young expat) is nice but might distort a bit their point of view of what Life is or going to be... their Life might not be as ours (always hoping better for them than for us but...) My greatest struggle is the fact that not all parents have the same views, restrictions, curfews as I do. Most of my son's friends are allowed to stay out late on weekends (some even on weeknights!) as late as 5am. My son wants to leave the house at 10 pm to meet his friends, and because of that we are in constant disagreements. The other concern is how alcohol is sold in Bangkok to underage kids, as well as how easy it is to get any illegal drugs in just about any corner. We try to provide the best possible education for our children. 1, Air polution 2, Difficulty in moving in the town due to busy traffic. 3, Sexual attraction in residential area Different "policies" re: raising of kids in different families - expectations and norms re: alcohol, smoking, drugs, illegal activity (frequenting nightclubs underage) etc. NO outdoor activity / work & play both in computer? The concern is small and not great when it comes to raising kids in Bangkok. Once they are put in a good school half the struggle is over, if they are able to adjust to the way of life then 75% is done and if they are kept away from bad elements and not lured into dangerous things then 100% is achieved. As parents, our major concerns are that he is in the right peer group and moves with right persons charged with ambitions. Knowing what area's or venues are safe, if they go out. The places they go to change, and its hard keep up w what is in fashion / what is safe. Drugs, bad influences, smoking Main concern drugs and how much freedom to give him. I don't want to be too hands off nor do I want him to be too restricted. The other problem is balancing time between home and work. Easy access to alcohol. Bars/clubs that let young teens in. Inebriated teens walking around busy streets late at night. Late curfews by so many parents. My biggest concern is Drugs. There seems to be such a 'lax' attitude about it everywhere and I worry when the girls go out. I am concerned about the policy on drugs and what is NIST stand/take on this? Our son wants to be independent. It is hard to set limits here in Bangkok, when it comes to places to go with friends, how to get around. He is NOT allowed to go on motorbikes, as the only one of his friends, so he takes taxis, small truck etc., and go with our driver. Is that okay...What time to come home in the evening, speaking about sex and prostitutes in the street,
2 NIST COUNSELING - October 2012

who are openly approaching him, as he is very tall, blond and look like a young man now. etc. Pls. have this meeting in groups, so they address the different age groups, as it is very different issues, we are dealing with! That he can't ride a bike to school due to traffic. No major concern. Time management between the computer pass time and studies is her issue. Reading less is her issue. Hearing and reading news is her issue. The safety & security aspects, not being taken advantage of by dishonest people. Language barriers. None really - a safe and interesting city. I guess her safety on public transport and the roads might be a worry.

Please share any experiences, tips, or strategies that have helped you raise your child in Bangkok.

1. Give them space to be with their friends after school and trust that they are in school. 2. Give them limited pocket money. 3. Get them involved in sports during weekends so they don't spend their time at the mall. When they are seriously not coping with moving to Bangkok seek help, counsellors (private) Share your concerns with the school. Always make time to listen to your child. Set clear boundaries when they are out with their mates. We believe that trying to build responsibility and trust in one's teenager is the best way to go, even though at times a little scarier than monitoring their every move -- but ultimately we believe more effective. Setting certain key parameters and insisting on reachability are our nonnegotiable. Also, talking continually with one's teenager about what's going on and raising awareness about possible risks/unintended consequences is key, without sounding alarmist or heavy-handed (in which case, communication can shut down). Thai language - we share our knowledge and learn/help from each other. Get her familiar with the geography/map of the city She has to make a plan stating what she will be doing with times and who will be accompanying her if she is out without us. Mobile phone always charged. Open house. Travel and expose our children to slower ways of being. Keep them busy. Sign them up for lots of activities; don't let them sit around the house. Set aside time for Skyping and calling friends and family back home. Kids can quickly lose touch (especially younger) if it is not planned. On the other hand, they can be up all night Skyping with friends if not controlled.

3 NIST COUNSELING - October 2012

Simply talk to them calmly and nicely when they are in a good mood to listen to us. That is what we have found as a solution to talk, talk, and solve. We just spend more time with them. Be understanding and be patient when they are teenagers. Well, it is easy to teach children, I am talking about the older kids here, about drugs and alcohol. But some parents are still unaware because they don't strictly follow up with the kids when they get home after partying. I recommend parents not to take this lightly. Trust your children but you are still a parent and always keep an eye on them. Talk is easy - taking action is hard. Be kind and loving to the kids but remember they are kids so don't ever be too busy working or socializing. Don't take it for granted that your teenagers are responsible. Be gentle reminders all the time. To find a lot of sports opportunities in your immediate proximity (Tennis, Golf range, Sports at school) to keep kids occupied since they otherwise lack of movements (no walking, no bicycle). Focusing on strong family ties by spending lots of time together. Skyping with old friends. Following up. Caring with love. Make sure my rules are clear to my children and they understand the consequences.(Concerns in Bangkok are entertainment venues, underage drinking, late nights Drugs). Make sure my children participate in work around the house. Trying to get a big network of friends however can be difficult as you get to know/love people and then they move on. Hard to keep making new friends. Also NIST parents seemed to be used their tight groups and are not open to new people, compared to the last small school we were at in Bangkok. Our rules include texting with cab license plate information, going home in groups, not leaving anyone behind, being aware in groups so that no one is 'lost', keeping us informed about where he is, making sure the girls get home safely, listening to his gut if something doesn't feel right, use us as his excuse for not doing something. Bangkok is nice however : get out of it - regularly. Bangkok can also be tiresome - noisy, cramped. Getting back to nature for a (long) weekend helps. Create plans for weekends and time off school. No sense of neighbourhood so things don't just happen by themselves.... 1. Having friends over the weekend or going to their friends home (minimizing meetings in shopping canters/ "unnecessary" on going shopping - is working for our girl. 2. Keeping them busy with sports (worked very good for our son otherwise he would have spent his time on the computer playing harsh games). I am hoping to hear these tips and strategies from other parents. I am struggling to keep my boy away from bad company. Set a good example for our children, listen, and pay attention to details. Try to make them understand the value of community service and encourage them for participation. I would like to suggest a tip for the teenagers living in Bangkok or anywhere else. I have experienced some kids having left their mobile phones at home or running out of battery and they do not know any useful phone numbers by heart. I suggest that they have at all times in
4 NIST COUNSELING - October 2012

their wallet/bag a printed list of useful emergency numbers which they can use and save them from stressful situations. The beauty of Bangkok is that if you have an interest for yourself or your family, most likely you can find it. It might take some time and asking around, but there are loads of different experiences available. Having an open mind and stepping out of your comfort zone always helps too! Like anywhere make the home a nice, comfortable place they want to come home to, don't leave it to paid staff to make your home a home. I'm not sure we've raised him any differently here than we would back home. Except, we believe, our lives here are much richer than back home. Bangkok is a great city and we love living here. Just explore and enjoy what the city has to offer. It definitely broadens our cultural outlook in terms of being immersed in a modern society mixed with some traditional Thai way of living. Spending time with and being supportive. The tips I got from my friends residing in Bangkok for years is that never curb the child's desire to do anything, give her freedom at the same time keep an eye on them, a good schooling experience and a good friend circle is important. They should know where to limit themselves too and monitoring them always in studies is as important even for career mothers. Behave with them like friends so they wont be afraid to voice their views and opinions. Encourage to bring friends home.....than to spend too much time outside the house - Keep occupied with sports and other extra-curricular activities. Try to support as much as possible and also push for an active life. Fortunately my child isn't that interested in nightlife (yet) , so no asking for going to Kao san road etc. Living the life of an expatriate does make you come closer to your immediate family. I guess it is because you are away from your home country, therefore, one clings on to what you have. Sitting and spending quality time (even more) with our children was and is one good way of rearing them and which has helped them adjust to the new surroundings. Giving them the freedom to think outside the box and treating them as friends also works (even more when you're living out of your home country). Tips: 1) Daily dialogue with the child crucial 2) Parents to let the child know that they "know" what is going on 3) Encourage child to share/discuss daily happenings and plans. Be willing to try new things, welcome friendliness with friendliness and don't expect cars to stop for you if you are walking or biking. Develop a relationship in which you can trust each other. Value the child's opinion. If you try to forbid everything they will go secretly. Set a few simple rules (e.g. respond to SMS, be home on the agreed time, do not travel alone). We have explained that there is a time for everything in life and should not be influenced by peers for late night activities. Raise them in a Christian environment, including church and the youth group from the church. Avoid Thai officials as much as possible.

5 NIST COUNSELING - October 2012

I set a curfew. Sometimes I go to bed, set my alarm for 5 minutes before my son is to arrive home, then I'm up to talk to him when he gets home. He knows I will be waiting for him. He knows I will expect a goodnight hug which includes passing the 'smell test'. I encouraged them to be engaged in different school/social activities so they do not spend too much time in the malls. It is a struggle. Happy for him to use the Sky Train - but should have phone with him. Discussed 'lady boys' with my son; it is important that he does not discriminate. I myself pursue studies by attending study programs in the US. I work. Setting a personal example helps. Continue to ask what his friends are like, shared interested, extra-curricular activities makes a difference.

6 NIST COUNSELING - October 2012

Survey Responses from Parents who have moved in to Bangkok from another Country

If you have moved to Bangkok from another country, what was the most significant change that affected you and your children? How did you adjust to this change?
1. The lack of green space and outdoor activities. We joined an athletic club. My family seems OK with it, but for me it is a poor substitute. 2. Safety, we appreciate this change. 3. Bus to school goes very early because of the combination of busy traffic and early start at school. Had to bring bed time forward and learn as a family to get organised the night before and get up early to get dressed, eat etc. The heat was also a big issue - we came from UK. Sun hat, sun cream and plenty of water helps! 4. The heat, size of the city, the noise, getting from A to B. Take time to get to know BKK. Go exploring on the weekends as a family. Ask for help when needed 5. Not being able to be outdoor as much as we would like to (too hot), not being able to let the children play outdoor without supervision and to let them explore nature. Language: Not being able to play with friends in a language they know. It is difficult to play with friends; you always have to make an appointment, take your child to and from their friends and it is difficult to be spontaneous. In Bangkok it is difficult just to walk on the sidewalk because you always have to tell the children to watch out for motorbikes etc. It is also quite hard for the children always trying being touched, pinched, kissed and hugged by strangers on the street. We are using a lot more of "don't" and "no", for instance "don't touch that!" ;-) The children are quite happy to play indoor as well. We have a pool and we take them swimming and we also have a small sports hall where we can play ball. We go to the park in the weekends and leave Bangkok as much as we can to go to the beach. 6. Language. Children study in English at school. They also need to study their home language at home. 7. People touch my children on the streets. Its a very kind touchy/feely culture as it regards children but my kids don't like it. 8. Long days for the kids due to the use of the school bus (2 hours a day). Less time to relax and do homework. 9. Biggest change was frequent exposure to unsavoury activities and ease of moving around city on their own; also, the fact that restaurants/bars/7-11s allow purchase/consumption of alcohol by underage kids. We have adjusted by talking about all potential risks, and requiring cell phone to be on at all times, and communication about with whom and generally (but not always specifically) where they are going when going out at night. 10. My children are extremely materialistic and very brand conscious. We are still adjusting to these changes.

1 NIST COUNSELING - October 2012

11. Access to other families. Bangkok for its lively scene is quite limited for families and social activities. Getting access to information is not easily available. Getting around is not easy and I think this results in less social engagements. 12. I was no longer working and could spend more time with the children i.e. taxing to extracurricular activities, spend time helping with homework. I adjusted by throwing myself into other interest areas i.e. learning a language, playing sport and assisting my children with their education. My children pretty much hit the ground running (so to speak) travelling and starting anew was not foreign to them but there was a 2 month transition period for them in terms of learning the ropes at school and making new friends. I helped by talking a lot with the children on their concerns and discussing how other people overcome new environs. 13. The travel time and early mornings, when teenagers generally don't function so well. Bed time has become much earlier. 14. Change: being away from our community of friends/family and home routine. We are adjusting by building friendships here and encouraging children to Skype grandparents. 15. Y11 - Teenager missing her friends and life in home country. Y11 and Y6 Both loved acting but the opportunities here for anything above and beyond school based programs are limited. They had to find new pursuits, but frustrating that we cannot support them developing these talents. 16. Thank goodness we have all settled in well. We have focused on establishing new friendships and leaving behind old ones has been hard. I have allowed children as much time as they want on the computer to talk to friends and family and they now need it less and less. 17. The prominent change for us is the weather. But we have adjusted to it now. 18. Significant change: environment, language, food, housing. We took some time adjust & adapt to it. 19. Education and housing environment 20. Can`t use bike to visit friends Adjustment: SKYPE and Sport at school 21. The lack of friends who speak our language and much bigger school were challenging but she has survived pretty well. NIST is big school and perhaps it was also easy for her to find and make new friends - big size can be advantage as well! 22. Waking up earlier! Making new friends in a larger school - previous school had 300 students. 23. We never lived in a capital and such a big city before. Transportation is a significant change for us. We just had to fit that in our schedule and learn how to do fewer things in one day. 24. The lack of nature and outside activities. We try to do active things e.g. ice skating, bike riding 25. The most significant change is the size of the City and what it has to offer for youth in the way of activates. We adjusted by doing things through the school. 26. Making new friends and learning the local customs. The language barrier appears insurmountable. We are still learning and adjusting. 27. # 1 factor is traffic and time wasted in traffic.

2 NIST COUNSELING - October 2012

28. Leaving close friends behind and moving into a densely populated area with few public open spaces. Children use Skype to stay in touch with friends in other country. We take breaks out of Bangkok - usually to the seaside. Encourage children to make new friends. 29. A complete cultural difference. Adjusted with an open mind and a curious attitude. 30. Diverse and multi-cultural nature of the city. This is a positive change. 31. The most significant change was the change in our life style. We used to go to park for our family time or to catch up with friend, but in Bangkok we spend our time at Shopping Malls. Back home, our kids played at the park or our yard, but over here in Bangkok they have to stay in door due to the heat. Back home, there are parks in every residential estate and within walking distance. In Bangkok we have to travel a distance to get to a park or travel outside Bangkok. 32. Different language and strange relationship Studying foreign language and make easy relationship 33. No seasons and little time to spend outdoors. My son always comments he thinks it is so dirty and smelly - not sure if that is a significant change.... more chaotic and less feeling of security and order. 34. My kids have only lived here in Thailand, so there have been no changes for them. For me, it has been having household help (it was a good change! i didn't have family close by before moving here.) I adjusted easily to this! I was lucky, though, because I have not had any problems whatsoever with our helper, and she has become a part of the family. It has made me have more time with my kids. 35. Climate, pollution, limited outdoor activities. We adjusted by slowly getting used to the heat so we could be outside a bit more, and finding where the kid friendly air conditioned places are! 36. The most significant change was a positive one: the safety of living here when it comes to pick-pocketing or car-jacking unlike where we lived before, leaving the house meant always looking over your shoulders and hoping to get back home safely

37. I presumed that it might be making new friends and try our best to understand the lifestyles and cultures that we live in. 38. Having domestic help:) It has been a positive change, as I am able to spend more quality time with each of my children. 39. We really felt the change because we left such a tight community in our previous location. We were surrounded by other workers with whom we had loads in common. The other thing which I found difficult was the lack of working Mums although I am meeting a few more now. Most families seem to have only one working parent, This has also not helped with our son's social life! Our nanny at our previous location had a network of nanny friends and all the kids used to play together - but that doesn't seem to be the case here. 40. Lost of friends - until now no solution. Try to make new friendship, but not so easy. Esp. girls are difficult.

3 NIST COUNSELING - October 2012

41. City versus nature. We choose a compound with garden and make trips outside of Bangkok in the weekend 42. Congestion (traffic and people), we had always lived in smaller communities, so this was very different. We adjusted by having the mind-set that it was a wonderful adventure, with many differences that we would not have experienced otherwise. It's all in the attitude!!! 43. Pollution and Congestion. Still trying to adjust. 44. Exposure to different ethnicities and cultures. Embraces it and learned more about people and where they come from. Additionally, the level of poverty is another drastic change. We talk about the differences in people in society regarding wealth and opportunities. 45. Their father was away a lot travelling once we arrived here. No public libraries and community childrens events. No walking or riding bikes like we had done before. 46. Less freedom for son to move around the city by himself alone. As gradually settle down, shall try to take BTS or Taxi. 47. The change in weather and lack of outdoor play and activities continue to be a challenge. So, now we just have all our fun indoors and it works out fine. 48. We (mum, dad, one kid) moved from living in a small comfortable home in our home country to a big home shared with relatives. It was a good change having community and people to help with the kid. However it meant having less control over what went into my child's mouth. 49. A lot of our recreational activities must be planned in advance. Living in Bangkok, we learned to deal with the traffic and the communication barrier. 50. The lack of easily accessible parks and the heat. 51. There were a few tears at the start because she missed her former friends but she settled quickly and made new friends. Our life-style changed dramatically, living in a crowded foreign city. The school's activities are great. We see the biggest advantage is that our daughter is being 'internationalised." She is meeting kids from Thailand and other nationalities. She is seeing a different world and culture. 52. Too much time wasted in traffic and it is too hot to walk for more than 10 minutes. We had to just get used to the unchangeable facts and try to see the positives. 53. The language was the most significant challenge but also the culture of how things are handled. Since our child didn't speak any English before moving here this demanded a lot of him in the first year. Another aspect is the "rich kid" syndrome as our child wants to have everything from iPhone over wee and other gadgets just simply because a lot of kids in the class have it. 54. As above - free play outdoors and being active in public outdoor spaces. 55. When we moved to Bangkok the most significant change that affected me and my children are technology usage. Back home, there were course material for every subject and written works in notebooks were more whereas here the online usage of laptops are more significant. We adjusted fast enough with the help of teachers and friends. They have become more broadminded and practical. 56. The pace of school and life in general. We make sure we take time together as a family and allow each other time to be alone
4 NIST COUNSELING - October 2012

57. Language and food would be the two main points for us. I guess its basic but yes those were the two that kind of affected my children the most. That said, the next was friends and family (the lack of it!) 58. We moved to Bangkok in 2005. All the teething problems in settling down were addressed in the first 6 months. 59. Loss of freedom, when you can get on your bike and go to see your friends, go swimming, to park, to shop etc. all by yourself. Here in BKK we live in our little gated community. Move in a car from A to B. 60. Moving from a very small school to a very big one. We met sure to a meet a school friend with the same nationality before starting school. But in the end time was needed to adjust and particularly finding friends. 61. The heat and lack of outdoor space to play. Adjustment via choosing an apartment with plenty of outdoor area to run in. 62. We were not affected as she and us have adapted to the city, school and friends easily. 63. Living here since 10 years. Biggest change was dealing with pervasive corruption at all levels (traffic, public places, police) 64. Students out at such a late hour (1am is considered 'too early') I stick to an 11pm curfew but have to entertain frequent discussions about it. Bargaining too. 65. The langguage. They almost forgot their native tongue. They dont have the time to learn the Thai language properly. As a result they/we do not have the same interaction with the locals. We are still adjusting. 66. We have just moved to Bangkok. Everything is different. Here you have access to everything, god and bad. In our previous location, there is too little to do for a teenager. Luckily he got some good friends, that are responsible, and we trust they do not go somewhere not allowed. For us as adults, the living in BK is much intense but is also harder to get in touch with people. The last school, they did a lot to get parents together. I feel when I come to NIST at pick up times, nobody talks, and if they do it is in small "closed" groups. I now it's not the schools job to take care of us, and you have done an amazing job with my son.. He has settled very well already! Thank You! 67. -It took a long time for my son to be 'accepted' at NIST. I still can't get used to the street vendors, telephone boxes, electrical posts on the pavement; walking is not a pleasure anymore 68. Meeting new friends & being comfortable in new school/living surroundings. Fortunately the NIST student population was warm & receptive which made the adjustment a lot easier 69. We found it a very easy and happy move.

5 NIST COUNSELING - October 2012