COMMITMENT: Backbone of Successful Marriages (4) You are reading: Christain Family's Family Matters by Past.

Faith Oyedepo Date : June 28, 2012

Dear Reader,

Calvary greetings to you in the name of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ! For the past two weeks now, I have been teaching on commitment as the backbone of a successful marriage. From these teachings, we have been able to establish what commitment really means.

Last week, we did examine the second level of commitment. This week, we shall be examining the Benefits of Commitment. To the husband, Commitment Compels Love:

Your primary responsibility is that of loving your wife, and commitment compels love. That is, where there is commitment to God and to your spouse, love becomes automatic. Commitment becomes a driving force, pushing you to love your wife (Ephesians 5:25).

When I see a man who finds it difficult to love his wife, I know that the problem is essentially that of lack of commitment to God and to his marriage. When there is commitment, you wont need to be persuaded to love your wife; it will come naturally.

My husband, for instance, is highly committed to God and to the success of our home. Therefore, it is easy for him to lavish so much love on me, even without my asking for it. That is commitment!

You must know that there is no wife who hates to be loved, and there is no

woman that will not respond positively to love. Someone once said that submission is a response, because when you love your wife she responds by submitting. Therefore, tension and quarrelling in a home are indications of the absence of love. The same principle goes for other members of the family.

Commitment to the success of your family makes you invest time into the lives of your children. You must ensure that the children have a constant assurance of your love.

A commitment to love your family is not complete, until you give voice to it. No matter how spiritual a woman is, she still wants to be told that she is loved. I can tell you this as a woman, that I want to hear my husband give voice to his commitment by telling me how much he loves me, and he does! These are some of the things that hold our home together. To the wife, Commitment Triggers Submission:

Just as commitment provokes love, it also triggers submission. If you are truly committed to the success of your marriage, you will be submissive to your husband. But when you are stubborn and naughty, it is a sign of lack of commitment to your home.

Contrary to some peoples thinking, submission has nothing to do with slavery. Rather, it is an act of the will. Submission means willingly putting yourself under someone elses authority. A committed wife needs no advice to submit to her husband. Her commitment is a driving force. I am not talking about submission under duress, but from a willing heart.

An area where many women find it difficult to submit in marriage is in their finances. Money is a god to such women. I learnt to submit my earnings to my husband right from the time I was engaged in secular employment. Mark you, I was not just throwing it at him, but handing it over to him respectfully. Thats why now he does not wait for me to ask for money; he just keeps giving to me!

I would, however, like to sound a note of caution here, for the sake of balance.

It was easy for me to hand over my salary to my husband, because our relationship permitted that. I could trust him. He was not bullying me or spending the money in an unaccountable manner. Dont expect her to submit all her income to you if you are going to spend it frivolously, without any consideration for her own needs as well.

Wherever there is commitment in a marriage, there will be love and submission: both parties working together for the success of their home. Personally, I dont find it stressful to submit to my husband, not just now, but right from the days of little beginnings. I never had to be coerced into doing so. I have always found it a thing of great joy.

To get God committed to your marriage, you need to first of all be committed to God. Getting committed to God entails confessing your sins and accepting Jesus as Lord and Saviour of your family. If you know you are not committed to God and you want to, you can say this prayer of faith:

Dear Lord, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me my sins. Cleanse me with Your precious Blood. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Now I know I am born again!

Congratulations! Till I come your way again next week, call or write, and share your testimonies with me through:

E-mail: faithdavid@yahoo.com Tel. No: 234-1-7747546-8; 07026385437, 07094254102

For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all the Living Faith Churches, and other leading Christian bookstores:

Marriage Covenant Making Marriage Work

Building A Successful Family.