HOW TO HEAL AN ADOLESCENCE WHO HAS SUFFERED FROM SEXUAL TRAUMA.

MOMMY WHY ME?

HOW TO HEAL AN ADOLESCENCE
WHO HAS SUFFERED FROM
SEXUAL TRAUMA.

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HOW TO HEAL AN ADOLESCENCE WHO HAS SUFFERED FROM SEXUAL TRAUMA.

HOW TO HEAL AN ADOLESCENCE

WHO HAS SUFFERED FROM SEXUAL TRAUMA

INTRODUCTION:
My research paper will focus on the after effects and signs of an adolescence that
has been sexually molested and/or raped. When a child has been molested and/or raped,
what happens? How has it changed their life? How can they overcome the trauma, and/or
overcome the negative experience(s). What kind of physiological damage is caused on the
adolescence after experiencing a sexual trauma? And what kind of help can they seek.
I will explain the definitions of Trauma and sexual abuse. I will research as to
why girls/boys sometimes take years to report their predator. I will explain what type of
feeling they go through while holding the abuser to themselves and not telling anyone . I
will interview my niece who is now 18 years old and experienced this when she was 12
years old, but did not tell anyone about it until recently.
The reason I chose this topic because I wanted to self-educate myself about sexual
trauma. Two of my loved ones experienced this molestation at an early age and did not tell
anyone for years. Although, we are a united family, It took years for this girls to be able to
recognized and realized what they had experienced against their will.
When finally everything came out in the open, it was hard for me to understand
how did had happened. The questions to me was Mommy why me?, it was hard for to

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explain to my daughter and niece, why this had happened to them, and I recall just telling
my daughter and my niece that God has a plan for everyone, and someday this with this
experience they will be able to be able to help someone that the does not have the love
and support as they do.
Lastly, I will explain what TF-CBT is the effectiveness of TC-CBT. It makes a big
difference in someones life when they receive treatment and how they are able to
overcome negative, feelings, suicide thoughts and to accept that it is not the victims fault.
DEFINITIONS:

What is Trauma?
There are so many different types Trauma but I will only be focusing on one type
of physical Trauma, Sexual Trauma. I will explain the definition of Trauma and Sexual and
what is happens when there both are combined.

The word trauma is used to describe experiences or situations that are

emotionally painful and distressing, and that overwhelm peoples ability to cope, leaving
them powerless. Trauma has sometimes been defined IN reference to circumstances that
are outside the realm of normal human experience. Unfortunately, this definition doesnt
always hold true. For some groups of people, trauma can occur frequently and become
part of the common human experience. (The Center for Nonviolence and Social Justice,
2010).

What is Sexual?

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HOW TO HEAL AN ADOLESCENCE WHO HAS SUFFERED FROM SEXUAL TRAUMA.

Sexual is a feeling that impulse you to want to have a sex. It is an urge that your body
desires. This feeling is caused by an electrochemical that send signal to your the nerves
muscles, causing urges for satisfaction.

relating to the instincts, physiological processes, and activities connected with physical
attraction or intimate physical contact between individuals. (www.thefreedictionary.com
2003-2010)
What is Sexual Trauma?
Sexual Trauma train of events that occurred over a period of time, for example;
rape, molestation, sexual harassment and/or peer pressure to act upon sexual acts. Sexual
Trauma are traumatic events that occurred to a child and/or adolescent against their will,
that has impacted in several ways the victims life forever.

Sexual trauma is traumatic when the person involved feels a sense of fear, helplessness,
injury or threat of injury. The level of perceived threat and traumatic reaction to that threat
is very individual and almost impossible to anticipate. One person may react far differently
than another despite very similar situations. (http:www.rainn.org, 2010)
LITERATURE REVIEW
My research paper will look at the dynamics and focus on how to heal an
adolescence who has suffered from sexual abuse either by a relative(s), friend(s) or a
stranger. Sexual abuse is something is happening all over the world, but I will only focus
on cases that have occurred within the Los Angeles County. We will exam the after the
affects of someone that received professional help and also someone that did not receive
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any therapy and/or help. How did this impact their life as adults, how did horrible events
in their early adolescence years impact their emotions, social skills, and physical.
The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services Childrens Bureau
report Child Maltreatment 2010 (Los Angeles) found that 9.2% of victimized children were
sexually assaulted (page 24).
Studies by David Finkelhor, Director of the Crimes Against Children Research Center,
show that:

1 in 5 girls and 1 in 20 boys is a victim of child sexual abuse;

Self-report studies show that 20% of adult females and 5-10% of adult males
recall a childhood sexual assault or sexual abuse incident;

During a one-year period in the U.S., 16% of youth ages 14 to 17 had been
sexually victimized;

Over the course of their lifetime, 28% of U.S. youth ages 14 to 17 had been
sexually victimized;

Children are most vulnerable to CSA between the ages of 7 and 13.

What is the TF-CBT? This means the Trauma-Focuses Cognitive Behavior Therapy
for children affected by sexual abuse or trauma. This program has been proven to show
children and adolescents to overcome their trauma they have suffered. This program has
been designed to build a better understanding for the victims and their parents. By

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therapy sessions they threat the level of depression, anxiety, dysfunctional feeling and
developing feeling and/or beliefs.
Many other Adolescents also suffer from RTS, which stands for Rape Trauma
Syndrome. Rape Trauma Syndrome (RTS) is the medical term given to the response that
survivors have to rape. It is very important to note that RTS is the natural response of a
psychologically healthy person to the trauma of rape so these symptoms do not constitute
a mental disorder or illness.(Rape Crisis 2015)
After doing the research, I also found 6 steps that can parents assist their children
with coping after being had experienced something so horrible. I found the following
seven steps to be a great start for someone that has experienced such trauma. Best way to
overcome these types of events is to get help, and not to hold it inside you. Once you
begin to heal you will feel better about yourself, and you will regain control of yourself and
maybe some day help someone that has experienced the same thing as you.
1. Encourage yourself or loved one to express herself: Victims of sexual assault are
three times more likely to suffer from depression.

2. Help explore contemplative practices: A contemplative practice quiets the mind in

order to cultivate a personal capacity for deep concentration and insight. Examples
include yoga, tai chi, meditation and prayer. This is particularly helpful in healing
dissociation, a way that trauma victims disconnect from their experience in order to
survive

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3. Talk about healthy relationships: Surviving sexual assault is one of greatest predictors
for your teen to eventually experience some form of relationship violence. Be pro-active in
discussing the difference between an abusive and a respectful relationship.

4. Honor boundaries: Ask for permission before touching or hugging the survivor. It is
important that she feel in control of her body at all times.

5. Never blame the survivor: Remind her that it is not her fault. She did whatever she
needed to in order to survive. Ultimately, the greatest gift you can give is to be a patient,
empathetic listener.

6. Visit the website for help: There are many researches that have very intense selftherapy that can help start the healing process.

METHODOLOGY
I conducted an interview on my eight year old niece. My niece Daisy, was sexually
molested at age 7. She held did not tell anyone until she was 18 years old. This same
situation occurred to my daughter who is now 12 years old, but my focus will be Daisy,
since she is now 18 years old. This interview will only be about her Daisy.
Daisy, remembers this happening to her at age 7. Daisy has vague information
since it occurred such a long time ago. Daisy, told me that she recalls this boy who was
approximately 6 years older. This boy lived next to Daisy grandmothers house. His parents
were good friends with the family. Daisy remembers playing with this boy, and one day she

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recalls that he touched her private parts. Daisy, is a very shy girl, and very innocent. She
thought that this boy was playing with her, and it was all part of paying, little did she
recognized the signs of sexual abuse. Daisy, tells me that this happened to her at least 3
times. One of the most disgusting things about this is that she also remembers the boys
mother being present. Daisy states that she did not think it was something bad happening
to her because she felt that his mother was there and would had stopped it.
Daisy didnt tell anyone about her feeling, it actually took her years to recognize
that she had been molested I felt funny when the boy touched me, it hurt me, I told him to
stop and he did, and we would started playing again. Daisy said she had forgotten about
what had happened to her until she was in the eighth grade. Her teacher played a movie
about inappropriate touching, and that is when it all stated to make sense. Daisy said she
tried not to remember but it came coming back to her heard. Daisy said she stated to pray
and that made her feel better Spiritual development is shaped both withing and outside of
religious traditions, beliefs, and practices. This development leads to searching, which
result in some young people enriched their faith and together diverging from religions
traditions they grew up with (2009 McNeely pg. 75).
Daisy never told anyone about what had happened to her. Daisy also said she was
embarrassed of her body as she started too developed, as if something weird was
happening with her body and she was very sensitive if anyone would even touch her back.
After years, and years of holding this deep secret to herself, she finally told her
parents, but not after learning that my daughter was a victim too from the same person.
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When my daughter,(in which I will not discuss herein), told me, and the word went around
my family. Daisy broke down and confesses to her parents that she was also a victim.
Daisy told me that if was not for my daughter coming clean she would had never told
anyone, and she I would have continued to buried this within mysel. Now, she says I
dont feel guilty anymore.
RESULT:
I gave Daisy a couple of articles that I found very useful her to read during. The
following are the articles that I gave to Daisy;
-Taking a developmental approach to Treating Juvenile Sexual Behavior
Problems.
-Rape and Sexual Assault, A Renewed Call to Action
- Trauma-Focuses Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Children Affected by
Sexual Abuse.
Daisy, opinion of reading the articles and being enrolled in therapy, made her
understand her it was not her fault, and she had no control of what was happening to her.
She also realized that perhaps the boy that molested had perhaps been a victim also, and
never received any help. Daisy also said that instead of punishing the boy with criminal
charges, we should get him professional help. We were all very surprised when she told
us this. Daisy has changed her mind and now wants to reconsider the current criminal

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charges. I do not if this was good thing, but it took a lot of courage for daisy to have
expressed herself this way.
DISCUSSIONS:
During my research paper I came across great resources that I will begin to use to
help both my niece and daughter. I feel that I was able to collect so much information that
I can basically give my own child therapy. This was such a hard topic to do, at one point
that I wanted to change it, just because of the emotions, but at the end I am glad I was able
to choose this topic. The most important thing that I learned was that we have to make
sure that our children or any victim dont blame themselves for what happened to them.
As stated above with my results, my niece Daisy was able to close this chapter of her life
and finally realized it was not her fault. I did not think I would had gotten such great results
by simply giving her some handouts. I strongly believe that Daisy was ready to move on
with her life and forgive this person her hurting her at such an early age.
Having communication with your children is a must. This is best way to be able to
gain trust in your children. I believed I had great communication with my nieces and
daughters, but I did not, apparently. Luckily, these girls were not been threaten by anyone,
they just did not know what exactly was going on because of their innocents.
It is extremely important for parents to always keep an close look at your children,
does not matter what age. The signs of abuse start to chose more one the child is going
through adolescents. Below is a list of the signs to look for;

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Developmental: Failure to thrive socially or academically Speech disordersDelayed

physical development Attachment issues, such as discomfort with physical contact or
difficulty connecting with others Lags in physical, emotional or intellectual development
Learning disorders
Behavioral: Behavior extremes, such as appearing overly compliant and passive or very
demanding and aggressive. Withdrawn and/or overly sensitive behaviors Increased fear or
avoidance of a specific person and/or situation Difficulty expressing thoughts and feelings
Substance use Changes in eating and sleeping patterns Anxiety and/or excessive worrying.
Psychological: Low self-esteem Uncharacteristic obedience or perfectionism Strong
feelings of shame or guilt Programmed statements or behaviors.
(joyfulheartfoundation.org, 2012).
I will continue to look further in to this topic, I feel that this has changed my life and
has change many perspectives I had. I was now able to align many thoughts I was not able
to understand before. I will also change the way I communicate with my daughter. Thank
you for this opportunity.

I can now take the armor off and feel safe again (unknown)

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REFERENCES:
http://www.nonviolenceandsocialjustice.org/FAQs/What-is-Trauma/41/
http://well.wvu.edu/articles/sexual_trauma
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/matter-personality/201210/why-dont-child-sexabuse-victims-tell
http://www.sagepub.com/upm-data/11559_Chapter_1.pdf
http://childwelfare.gov
Authors Clea McNeely, Jayne Blanchard, 2010, The Teen Years Explained: A Guide to
Healthy Adolescent Development
http://www.therefuge-ahealingplace.com/ptsd-treatment/child-sexual-abuse
https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubpdfs/trauma.pdf
https://www.whitehouse.gov/sites/default/files/docs/sexual_assault_report_1-21-14.pdf
http://www.baojournal.com/IJBCT/IJBCT-8_3-4/A04.pdf
http://im-possibleyouth.com/
http://www.joyfulheartfoundation.org/learn/child-abuse-neglect/about-issue/knowsigns?gclid=CNWn0e_YosYCFRdsfgodaikM6g#sthash.q6Z3R5Wk.dpuf

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