PROJECT ONE 1

Memorandum
To:

Professor Thompson

From:

Lexie Hirst

Date:

May 22, 2015

Subject:

Rhetoric of Memos

This memo shows a few pieces from my past writings to show they can improve
by the benefit of changing the flow. The sections below cover being concise,
being precise, being direct, and having stress emphasis. My writings that I have
chosen to use are a lab report from a biology class and a paper from a previous
English class.
1. Being Concise means that you dont use extra words that are unnecessary
and only use the words that the reader will need to understand what you are
trying to bring to the audience. Getting to the point in your writing will help keep
the readers on track and help avoid them from having to skim the writings when
they are reading through them.
In a piece of my writing, I noticed that I used I noticed that there was a lot in my
paper to describe what I was observing for a lab report. Looking back now, the
paper would have been much more effective and a lot less repetitive to the
reader, if I had exchanged that phrase for just one or two words.
I noticed that there was a small dam that is placed there to monitor the
water amount in the reservoir and is there to extract water out, if the lake
starts to overflow.
As I walked around the blue body, sparkling in the sun, I noticed that
there was many trails leading up into the trees where people could hike
and enjoy walking their dogs and getting exercise at the same time.
As I reviewed my work again, I realized that I overused the phrase I noticed that
there was, when I couldve used, viewed or seen. Using less words and
phrases in a paper will be easier for the viewer to read and understand. As I
reread these pieces from a prior piece of my work, in the sentences individually,
they sound well and flow well with the point I am trying to make. Although with
many sentences, similar to these two above put into a paper, can start sounding
unprofessional and the reader will get the point that I was observing something. I
couldve combined these sentences and listed several things that I noticed that
there was. This wouldve made the flow of the paper easier and less choppy.

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2. Being Precise means to use the appropriate information and deliverance for
the audience that will be reading the piece that you wrote. Also, this means to cut
the adjectives such as really or very out of the writings because in a nonfiction piece there is no need to emphasize a noun.
As I reach the top of the water, looking down, the lake is very active from
fish jumping out of the water, feeding on the small bugs that crest the
sparkling, blue top.
The water created a very peaceful sloshing sound as a gust of wind blew
through or as a fish jumped, the water would create a quick lopping
sound.
Instead of using very several different times to determine out abundant or large
things were, my work couldve been more effective had I changed up very or
just cut the very out completely out of my writings, as over exaggerating things
can make your paper redundant. Overusing adjectives makes all of the action
verbs or nouns become similar and eliminate the effect that the author is going
for.
3. Being Direct means not adding more adjectives or unneeded words or even
some phrases to a paper. Being direct is much like being concise in that way but
being direct also adds the factor of when you eliminate words, whether to change
your writing voice into active or a passive voice with your nouns.
Another phrase I used quite often in another English paper that I had written was
I realized. Many times throughout this paper I had used this phrase to get my
point across of something that I never had known before or something that I had
just learned. Although it was good to admit that I had realized something in my
paper, to show that I was learning in the classroom and improving my English
skills, it wouldve been more useful had I used a different verb.
I realized I suddenly went from clean, relaxing and fun to dirty, messy,
and depressing.
I realized that the part of the water was more closely monitored than the
field around the hill.
After viewing my work again and seeing how redundant I was in my writing, I
learned that I could change all of the I realized, into simple words without the I,
such as realized, viewed, or witnessed. I shouldve used those words
instead because the paper was written in past tense and my phrase that I
overused could be recognized either in present or past tense, which couldve
distracted and/or confused the reader. With using fewer words in a sentence, it
creates a well-rounded paper and makes it less wordy.

PROJECT ONE 3
4. Stress Emphasis means that in writing, some words are always stressed and
emphasized to create a climax or even conflict in writing. Typically, the stress
emphasis is either overused or used in the wrong place for the reader to get the
full effect and understand what the author is trying to get across.
Reviewing my biology reports from a past class, I overused the stress word of
only in all of my biology reports. With this being overused, it seemed as though
nothing after awhile was emphasized and attractive to the reader because as
seen below, using only two times in one sentence, equals the meaning of the
nouns you are trying to describe. If only is used on more than one thing in a
paper, nothing will be the most or the only thing that stands out to the readers
eye.
The other petri gel dishes that hosted the ampicillin (amp) and the
ampicillin and arabinose (amp+ara) created lesser results, since only
small yellow dots were present.
This fact does make sense because there are six different ways to have
recombinant types when there is only 2 different ways to have
nonrecombinant spores because they can only line up with either 3 black
spores on the top and 3 tan spores on the bottom or vise versa.
After reviewing my pieces of work after a few months of submitting these to my
college professor, I see that I couldve used something else to show the
differences between information or nouns and definitely only use one only in a
paper because if you dont, the reader will be distracted. Looking back now, it
makes me really annoyed that I used the same words over and over and they
lost meaning as the paper went on.
Conclusion
Overall, I learned a lot about writing papers of all non-fiction types and words to
avoid, phrases to shrink and adjectives to emphasize. I learned many valid points
could be portrayed onto all works yet to come in my life. It was interesting
learning about how just going back and reviewing your work on a clear mind and
on a different day, how that can benefit your writing skills and make your work
more attractive to the viewer. I will forever remember these points such as being
concise, being precise, being direct and having proper stress emphasis in my
present writings and pieces. Becoming a well-rounded writer takes the skills that
we have learned in this lesson. I have learned immensely how to improve my
writing on all levels and make my papers sound professional and proper.