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Rawan Alqallaf
Prof. Corri Ditch
English 113b
8 May 2015

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Multi-Culture
Cultures control and raise us in a particular way, from our actions to our appearance. A culture
is any group of people that share a way of life, Anastacia Kurylo. I picked the subject multiculture because it has a big influence on me, both a good and bad way. In other words, my
cultures has taught me important lessons in this life, and it has limited my actions through
connection with other cultures. In every culture there should be a way that people always
connect to each other than media. Culture in general is important because it is whom I am from.
It defines the traditions, the atmosphere around me, mentality, and my beliefs. It gives me the
identity I own, and it is my originality. Since I am from two different cultures, which they are
European and Arabian cultures. My Arabian culture taught me that I as a women, I should always
cover up and not to mingle with the other gender, which is men. According to our beliefs is that
women should respect herself by following the traditions. However, my other culture which is
European, traditions and beliefs gives the women freedom and opportunity to be whatever I want
to. It gives me the decision to be the girl I choose to be.

Whenever I am going, people will understand me more and get connect better if they got my
culture and its beliefs. According to the article it was mentioned that Understanding self-

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identity is important to inter/cultural communication because as you learn who you are, you learn
how to communicate effectively with others. Ronald L. Jackson Self Identity and culture. It
is important to know who I am, and how I want to live my life. In other words, it is necessary to
choose my identity, my path to follow, and to be convinced after all. Me as a girl with mixed
cultures, I respect my beliefs in both cultures, but I choose to build my life on what I am
confident with because it is what makes our personalities. Having the full knowledge of what I
am going through and how I make my own life decisions. What I am really satisfied of, the
author mentioned in her article is that Identity is a broad-based term people rely on to build
their own personality. Ronald L. Jackson.
I wanted to talk about the social life in my both cultures because it has an impact on me in a
big way. The reason why is that I have two different cultures, which is Arabian and European.
Im mixed with these two big cultures, they has nothing in common so they conflict and now I
am in Americas culture. Peoples mentality in Arabian culture does not look like the European . I
was born in a Europe where people are open minded for example, I could wear anything I would
like, I would eat anything no one would judge me and I would do my hair in a way I like, no one
would care. However, in Kuwait the Arabian Gulf country, which where I was raised in almost
my most of my living, they were different from language to religion. This really effected me and
harmed me that some traditions in my family are mixed and open minded, but where Im living
in the gulf, they are used to judge people immediately in a bad way. They are citizens who do not
care about anything just to talk about reputation. This really makes me feel afraid of talking and
gossip is that this country I lived in, is so small that everyone knows everyone. For example, if I
wore shorts in Europe, no one would even look at me. On the other hand, if I wore shorts in the

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gulf, there would be at least four to five people chasing me and others who would keep talking
bad things about me how bad girl I am just for wearing these shorts.
However, this is what really upsets me because some things I feel that is not a big deal, to them
it is. What I mean is in the gulf, it is forbidden to break rule or trying to have my own life. For
example, they accept me to be a girl to give up on my rights and not to have own freedom on my
personal life. They want me to do whatever they think is better for me without letting me to rely
on myself and be the self-identity I want. They want the girls to be fully hidden from everyone
by wearing covers all the time, not to be friends with other male, to obey them and be maid at
home, also they want the girls to work hard outside the home. However, in Europe, specifically
Russia, people are open minded in this culture, I can go with my friends out even if they were
not same my gender, we could hang out, get connected to each other in reality and that is totally
fine. I can take care of my home the way I like, without having strict rules, also I can share my
talents or to do outdoor activities. On the other side, I am not supposed to have any talents or to
share my activities with others because I am a girl, and that would be shame on my family. The
way they think is that women is the honor of men, and that reputation of good women is what
represent a great man. Overall Russians culture I can do things that I like and not feel afraid of
people of judging me in a bad way which is awful. Even when I traveled to the US to study,
people from the gulf, still judges me of the way I look, for example dying my hair. They would
talk about me still knowing that we are in US, we have much freedom and everyone is
responsible of them selves only. However, when I am around people from the gulf, I behave very
respectful and I always take care not to look at them especially guys because they would judge
also. Not only that but also I would wear very good and covered. On the other page, when I am

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around others, I dont really care about my hair or clothes. I would wear anything I like, I would
talk to people around me and being my self not to be afraid of anyone who would look at me in a
bad way. It is so annoying that people does not understand mix culture has an impact on some
others. They expect from me to be just like them. In fact I don't want to be anything else than
what I think I am satisfied of, and what is my parents think of me. People in the gulf area are
mean and selfish. They gives the priority to the men always, they impact the laws they want on
the girls. They would always excuse the men for their mistakes and saying that men does not
have any mistakes just because he is the guy and could do everything. After all, I would say that
justice and equality in the gulf is extinct.
Since I came to US to study, until now many problems and issues I have been facing just
because I am acting myself not the way they want. It is true that culture builds us up, but we can
choose whatever culture or beliefs we are fully satisfied with. According to the article "A Theory
Explaining the Functional Linkage Between the Self, Identity and Cultural Models it says that
Self, identities and cultural models are interactive, dynamic and interdependent systems that
connect the biological, psychological, social and cultural dimensions of human life.Victor C. de
Munck. Although Im not getting close to them or anything because I dont trust them, they
would keep on hurting me with bad words and talking in a bad way back of me. The most
important to me is that I have my own limits and no one can get control of how do I want to live
my life. I think it is not their business, people would talk either I did good things or bad things
because people would never feel contentment no matter what I would do or say.

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Living in two cultures is not easy as people think it is. For me I have been facing a lot of
problems and difficulties because of the different mentalities I have in my both family and
country. For example, if I had a boyfriend or just friends that are not same my gender, I would
accept different re actions from them. In my mother side, in Europe, they would think that it is ok
and fine for me to have a boyfriend, they would also meet him and get to know more about him.
On the other side, in the gulf, they would think that I am doing a big crime to them. They would
take it as a serious problem and they would punish me by beating or screaming at me. That is
why I do live a difficult life. It is hard for me to adapt with these two cultures. Since I lived in a
country and environment where people are strict and tough. I do act the way they want more. For
example, If I had boyfriend or friends I would not tell anyone. In that way I can satisfy the both
sides I have. Also I am making sure always to wear covered well and looking good so I am not
worried about bad reviews looking at me, or talking bad things about me to everyone just
because they did not like the way I look. Still in inside of me, I believe is that freedom means to
do what a human likes to as long as he/she do not across others rights. On that belief I act in the
United States. If I wanted to have male friends I would do because I am a student and we help
each others always. If I want to dress nice and like any other girls, I will because I am girl and I
deserve to have my own style. If I want to share my activity like some sports or talent with both
girls and boys, I will also. After all, I do respect my religion rules and limits, so I do not eat
bacon or drink alcohol, I do not play illegal games, or go to adult places. But I believe that I
should have appropriate ethics everywhere I go, I should never injustice or disrespect anyone.
Emotion that everyone has about themselves, play an important role in his mental health.
Adolescence is one of the most critical periods of life in terms of self-concept and identity

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development and according to Ericsson in this period, the person needs to obtain a fixed identity,
and feel valued as an individual who has a goal in life and in continue of their lives be a realistic
person Mehdih Ghadiri, Malikeh Beheshtifar. According to all of that, I am acting different
around different spots and people. In other words, I am not being my self honestly when I am at
school or just hanging out. For example, If I were around my colleges I would be more shy and
quiet. I would behave more calm and not looking at those people who are from my nationality at
all. The reason why because they have very strict and limited mentality and traditions. I am very
being careful about myself to avoid problems. On the other hand, when I am around my best
friends at home or in a resort, actually it is not just me, most of us we act this way always. If we
were alone we could feel more freedom and not worried about others. We can eat what we want,
dress the way we prefer, talk the way we are comfortable of and I can chill and meet new people.
When I am around people I love and trust, I am having more fun and relaxed. I feel like a bird
that can fly and have it is own freedom. Such a good feelings and great days I could ever spend
in my life.
Overall, what I am trying to say of all of these examples and words. It is not easy to live
between two different cultures and different societies. I have different thoughts for both of them.
I dont just act different, I think differently and I have been judged differently. My point is that
being a person with two various blood type is a beautiful thing to be more aware of the people
around me, to be realized what is going on in this world. Where does people came from and what
is the way do they think and act. On the opposite side, It is not easy to adapt unless I am living in
a one culture, religion, language, traditions and environment.

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Works Citation :
Mehdih Ghadiri, Malikeh Beheshtifar, Investigate the relationship between organization
identification and positive self-concept International journal of academic research ( January, 1
2015). Web. ( May, 4 2015)

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Victor C. de Munck, A Theory Explaining the Functional Linkage Between the Self, Identity
and Cultural Models foumalof Cognition and Culture (2013). Web. (May, 4 2015)

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Ronald L. Jackson, Cerise L. Glenn, Kesha Morant Williams, Self-Identity and Culture,
Journey through chapter 6

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Anastacia Kurylo, Culture and Communication, Journey through chapter 1

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