Isaac Macias

English 120
Taylor S Diaz
Traditional Reflection:
It is not always necessary to make a million changes to a final draft. In this case, I feel I was able
to make slight alternations and revisions that majorly improved the paper overall. The changes
included things such as altering sentences and adding additional details towards a specific part of
the paper. These changes allowed me to improve the paper by adjusting the words and sentences
to better the clarity as well as the overall idea of the paper itself.
From the beginning of the paper up to the point where I begin to explain the concept and use of
ethos was quite strong. I felt no need to make any specific changes within the first three
paragraphs and chose not to in order to keep them fluid in context. In the following paragraph
there was a comment suggesting I broaden my explanation and go into a bit more detail to better
support my statements. Here I decided to add one sentence, The degrees he has earned allow us
to know that this man has put time and effort into these fields and has the time and experience to
give a trustworthy testimony. This gave an explanation of why the professor I mentioned could
be a reliable source when it came to the ethical value of the ad. This sentence was short, effective
and to the point which I feel is needed more than adding multiple sentences that can dumb down
or drag an idea on too much. As for the next two paragraphs I received good feedback and as I
reread through them I felt no need for additional revisions other than simple grammatical
corrections. The Conclusion however needed the most revision. The first corrections I made
within the conclusion were in the first two sentences. As I reread them I agreed with the

comments given that stated how they were very stiff and choppy. To conclude, I feel that this ad
provides a very useful topic due to the previous statements I have made about what there is to
gain through a program such as the Bachelor of Arts in Liberal Arts. The information given
within this ad was brief yet powerful. The ad is short and to the point while displaying useful
information to the interests of the audience. This is what drew me to choose this particular ad. I
chose to take these sentences and rearrange the wording to allow this sentence to better flow with
starting a conclusion. To conclude, this ad provides a very useful topic and due to the previous
statements I have made I feel that there is much to gain through a program such as the Bachelor
of Arts in Liberal Arts. I moved phrases around such as I feel to allow for a more fluid
sentence. In the following sentences from the first one I decided to change them from three
separate and choppy sentences into two sentences with better word phrasing and word use.
What drove me to choose this particular ad involved how the information given within this ad
was brief yet powerful. The ad was short and to the point all while displaying useful information
to the interests of the audience. These changes allow the sentences to flow much better without
sounding as interrupted and stiff as the first three. The final changes I made to this paper
involved the last few sentences. I felt the concluding sentences need more detail and structure
than I had previously given them. I rearranged some wording as well as adding in quite a bit
more detail within my final thoughts on the issue. The final sentence goes from, I feel that is
what has allowed me to accept this ad as useful information to This allows us to become more
confident and assured of the reasoning behind our choices thus giving us the relief and
satisfaction of making the most beneficial and correct decisions for our lives. This allowed me
to feel much more confident with the ending of my paper and much more satisfied with the
concluding sentence and where it left the reader as they finished.

Overall some changes were necessary to fully capture the potential of the idea behind my paper.
Some additions must be made in order to properly express the full detail of an idea as well as
some subtractions which only take up space or interrupt flow within writing. In this case, small
adjustments and revisions were made and not much was changed in order to retain the same
motion within the paper. Once again I did not feel it necessary to change or add a ton of
information in the paper but rather fix the minor faults and details in order to create a better
flowing current that would better satisfy both the reader and I.