TRANSPORTS OF THE HEART

__________________________

Excerpt
By Gene Franklin Smith and Clyde Derrick

Contact:
Genefranklinsmith@gmail.com
(310) 663-8188

copyright 2002 Gene Franklin Smith and Clyde Derrick

People Portrayed
Heloise, philospher, Abbess, 1101-1165 A.D. France
Theon, young boy, 100 A.D., Roman Egypt
Marion Carpenter, chemist
Scott Carpenter, astronaut, b. 1925
Jack London, writer, 1876-1916
F. Scott Fitzgerald, writer, 1896-1940
Thomas Jefferson, U.S. President, 1743-1826
Maria Celeste Galilei, nun, 1600-1634, Italy
Galileo Galilei, astronomer, 1562-1642, Italy
Calamity Jane, frontierswoman, 1852-1903
Eleanor of Aquitaine, queen, Crusader, 1122-1204, England/France
Vincent Van Gogh, painter, 1853-1891, Holland
Sidonie Colette, France
Colette, writer, 1873-1954, France
Sybil Thorndike, actress, 1882-1976, England
John Adams, U.S. President, 1735-1826
Samuel Clemens, "M ark Twain", writer, 1835-1910
Dr. Les Parrott, psychologist, writer
Plutarch, historian, 45-125 A.D., Greece
Katherine Mansfield, writer, 1888-1923, New Zealand
Dorothy Thompson, journalist, 1893-1961
Lady Shigenari, 16th century, Japan
Evelyn Waugh, writer, 1903-1966, England
Napoleon Bonaparte, soldier, general, Emperor, 1763-1821, Corsica
Queen Victoria, 1837-1901, England
Elva Ruth Soper, b. 1932
Robert Ward, b. 1930's, American Cherokee, U.S. M arine
Keith Reynolds, b. 1947, U.S. Private
Queensberry, 8th M arquess, father of Lord Alfred Douglas, 1844-1900, England
John Johnson, b. 1950's
Groucho Marx, comedian, 1890-1977
Amelia Earhart, aviatrix, 1897-1937
Virginia Woolf, writer, 1882-1937, England
Bosnian Family, 1992, Sarajevo
Mary Fisher, AIDS activist, b. 1948
Marie Antoinette, queen, 1755-1793, France/Austria
Ethel Rosenberg, political activist, 1915-1953
E. Jack Neumann, writer, 1921-1988
Jessie Bernard, feminist scholar, 1903-1994

A dark stage. The ACTORS gradually enter,

listening to an occasionally repeating the prerecorded VOICE OVERS of the people they
will be portraying. Handwritten letters should
be placed about the playing area.
M ARION CARPENTER (V.O.)
On the eve of your great adventure...
F. SCOTT FITZGERALD (V.O.)
Worry about courage.
SYBIL THORNDIKE (V.O.)
Oh, isnt flying gorgeous!
AM ELIA EARHART (V.O.)
It was worthwhile anyway.
M ARIE CELESTE (V.O.)
I beg to hear how you are.
CALAM ITY JANE (V.O.)
The tongues wag!
BOSNIAN WOM AN (V.O.)
Things that we cannot and should not talk about.
DOROTHY THOM PSON (V.O.)
And I mean everything!
NAPOLEON (V.O.)
How could you have written this letter?
THEON (V.O.)
I wont say goodbye to you!
QUEENSBERRY (V.O.)
I will disown you!
VIRGINIA WOOLF (V.O.)
I cannot go on and spoil your life.

2.

JOHN JOHNSON (V.O.)

I wish I could tell you of all the miracles that have happened to me.
ETHEL ROSENBERG (V.O.)
Your own lives must teach you.
COLETTE (V.O.)
I am the daughter of the woman who wrote that letter
QUEEN VICTORIA (V.O.)
Never, never did I think I could be loved so much.
A shift in lighting, and the ACTORS now find
and read from the letters scattered on stage.
E. JACK NEUM AN
Now, then, Goddaughter!
LADY SHIGENARI
To Lord Shigenari, from his Wife.
PLUTARCH
Plutarch to his wife, greetings!
M ARIA CELESTE
M ost Illustrious Father.
GROUCH M ARX
Dear Warner Brothers.
ROBERT WARD AND VINCENT VAN GOGH
Dear M other.
AM ELIA EARHART
Dearest Dad.
KEITH REYNOLDS
Dear Folks.
VIRGINIA WOOLF
Dearest.

3.

HELOISE enters. The ACTORS should be

dressed simply and use a single prop or costume
piece to depict a change of character.
HELOISE
I have your picture in my room. I never pass it without stopping to look at it. If a
picture can give such pleasure, what cannot letters inspire? They have souls. They can
speak. They have in them all that force which expresses the transports of the heart.
A shift in lighting, as HELOISE steps out of
shadows.
HELOISE (CONTD)
Having lost the substantial pleasures of seeing and possessing you, I shall in some
measure compensate this loss by the satisfaction I shall find in your writing. I shall read
that you are my husband and you shall see me sign myself as your wife.
Hereafter, as noted, the ACTORS provide the
narration, which should be performed in a lively
manner and spoken directly and intimately to
the audience.
ACTOR
These wors were written in 1121 A.D. by a young woman named Heloise to her former
teacher and estranged lover, Peter Abelard.
ACTOR
Heloises uncle learned of their forbidden love and hired two men to abduct and castrate
Abelard.
ACTOR
Heloise was sent to a convent and Abelard to a monastery. They never saw each other
again.
ACTOR
But their famous love letters, expressing what Heloise called the transports of the heart
connected the couple for the rest of their lives.
ACTOR
As they have connected loved ones for centuries.

4.

ACTOR
We offer you the transports of the heart written to, from and about family.
ACTOR
Parents and partners.
ACTOR
Siblings and offspring.
ACTOR
Reaching out with unconditional love.
ACTOR
Boundless loyalty.
ACTOR
Comfort and support.
ACTOR
Spanning nearly three thousand years.
ACTOR
From the conqueror of the known world of ancient times -ACTOR
-- to an anonymous citizen of the last ten years.
M usic cues should be used throughout to set
historical period. TITLES for each sequence
may be conveyed by projection to coincide with
the ACTORs declaration. Projected slides of
the actual person, if available, may also be used.
ACTOR
M ost Illustrious Father.
THEON enters.
THEON
Theon, to his father Theon, greeting!

5.

ACTOR
In the second century A.D., a boy complains to his father in Roman Egypt.
THEON
It was a fine thing of you not to take me with you to the city! If you wont take me with
you to Alexandria, I wont write to you or speak to you or say goodbye to you! And if
you go to Alexandria I wont take your hand nor ever greet you again! That is what will
happen if you wont take me! I admit it was good of you to send me presents on the day
you sailed. Send me a lyre, I implore you! If you wont -- I wont eat, I wont drink!
There now!
THEON exits. M ARION CARPENTER
enters, writing a letter.
M ARION CARPENTER
M r. Scott Carpenter, Palmer Lake, Colorado.
Dear Bud, just a few words on the eve of your great adventure for which you have trained
yourself and anticipated for so long -SCOTT CARPENTER enters, reading the
letter.
SCOTT CARPENTER
-- to let you know that we all share it with you vicariously. As I think I remarked to you
at the outset of the space program -M ARION CARPENTER
-- you are privileged to share in a pioneering project on a grand scale -SCOTT CARPENTER
-- in fact, the grandest scale known to man.
ACTOR
On M ay 24, 1962, Scott Carpenter was the second American astronaut to orbit the earth.
The night before his historic flight, his father, M arion, a chemist, wrote to him.
M ARION CARPENTER
I venture to predict that after all the huzzas have been uttered and the public acclaim is
but a memory, you will derive the greatest satisfaction from the serene knowledge that
you have discovered new truths. You can say to yourself --

6.

SCOTT CARPENTER
-- this I saw -M ARION CARPENTER
-- this I experienced -SCOTT CARPENTER
-- this I know to be the truth. This experience is a precious thing. It is known to all
researchers in whatever field of endeavor, who have ventured into the unknown and have
discovered new truths.
M ARION CARPENTER
You are probably aware that I am not a particularly religious person, at least in the sense
of embracing any formal doctrines. Yet, I cannot conceive of a man endowed with
intellect, perceiving the ordered universe about him, the glory of the mountain top, the
plumage of a tropical bird, the intricate complexity of a protein molecule, the utter and
unchanging perfection of a salt crystal, who can deny the existence of some higher power.
He considers a perfectly formed leaf in his hand.
M ARION CARPENTER (CONTD)
Whether he chooses to call it God or M ohammed or Buddha or Torquoise Woman or the
Law of Probability matters little. I find myself in my writings frequently calling upon
M other Nature to explain things and citing Her as responsible for the order of the
universe.
SCOTT CARPENTER
She is a very satisfactory deity to me.
He finds the same perfect leaf in the letter he
reads from.
M ARION CARPENTER
And so I shall call upon Her to watch over you and guard you and if She so desires, share
with you some of Her secrets, which She is usually so ready to share with those who
have high purpose.
SCOTT CARPENTER
With all my love --

7.

M ARION CARPENTER
Dad.
As SCOTT and M ARION exit, JACK
LONDON and F. SCOTT FITZGERALD
enter.
ACTOR
American literary lions Jack London and F. Scott Fitzgerald were notoriously harddrinking, hard-living men. They also doted on their daughters.
JACK LONDON
I have met a number of philosophers. They were real philosophers. Their minds were
wonderful minds. But they did not take baths.
F. SCOTT FITZGERALD
Things to worry about: worry about courage, worry about cleanliness.
JACK LONDON
They did not change their socks, and it almost turned ones stomach to sit at a table with
them.
F. SCOTT FITZGERALD
Things not to worry about: dont worry about the past. Dont worry about the fure.
Dont worry about growing up.
JACK LONDON
Our bodies are as glorious as our minds, and just as one cannot maintain a high mind in a
filthy body, by the same token, one cannot keep a high mind and high pride when said
body is not dressed beautifully, delightfully, charmingly.
F. SCOTT FITZGERALD
Dont worry about mosquitoes. Dont worry about flies. Dont worry about insects in
general.
JACK LONDON
One one hand, of course, never over-dress. On the other hand, never be a frump.
F. SCOTT FITZGERALD
Dont worry about boys.

8.

JACK LONDON
Develop your mind to its utmost beauty.
F. SCOTT FITZGERALD
Dont worry about public opinion.
JACK LONDON
And keep your body in pace with your mind.
F. SCOTT FITZGERALD
Dont worry about parents. With dearest love,
BOTH
Daddy.
They exit, as THOM AS JEFFERSON enters.
He writes a letter with a quill.
THOM AS JEFFERSON
June 13, 1790
M y dear M aria,
We had not peas nor strawberries here til the 8th day of the month. On the same day I
heard the first whippoorwill whistle. When had you peas, strawberries and
whippoorwills in Virginia? Take notice hereafter whether the whippoorwills always
come with the strawberries and peas. When I come to Virginia I shall insist on eating a
pudding of your own making. Can you set a hen yet?
He crosses out an error hes written.
THOM AS JEFFERSON (CONTD)
Take care that you never spell a word wrong. It produces great praise to a lady to spell
well. If you love me, strive to be good to all living creatures and acquire all those
accomplishments which will go far towards ensuring you the love of your affectionate
father, Thomas Jefferson.
He exits. M ARIA CELESTE and GALILEO
enter. GALILEO kneels in prayer.
ACTOR
In 1633, astronomer Galileo Galiei was declared a heretic by the church of Rome for his
ground-breaking theory of the universe.

9.

ACTOR
His daughter, M aria Celeste, was a nun in an impoverished convent outside of Florence.
M ARIA CELESTE
M ost Illustrious Father,
Between the infinite love I bear you, Sire, I find it impossible to remain without news of
you. Therefore I beg to hear how you are. I have hastened my work on my linens and
they are almost finished. But I see I will not have enough fabric for the last two cloths.
Please do everything you can to get this to me quickly, so I can send them all to you
before you leave on your upcoming trip. And another think I ask of you, please, is to
send me your book, so that I may read it, as I am longing to see what it says.
GALILEO
I, Galileo Galilei, wrote and caused to be printed a book in which I treat of the already
condemned doctrine that the Earth is not the center of the world and that it moves. I
swear that I will never again say or write such errors, and I will denounce any person who
declaims said heresies to the Inquisitor of the Holy Catholic Church. I abjure with a
sincere heart and unfeigned faith.
M ARIA CELESTE
You must not make too much of these storms, but rather take hope that they will soon
subside and transform themselves from troubles into as many satisfactions. I pray you
not to leave me without the consolation of your letters, giving me reports of your
condition, physically and especially spiritually.
M ost affectionate daughter,
Sister M aria Celeste -- Galilei.
ACTOR
Knowing that her letters would be read by the Inquisition, Sister M aria Celeste signed her
last name and openly identified herself with her father, thus risking her own
excommunication.
GALILEO looks up from prayer.
GALILEO
But still the Earth moves.
M ARIA CELESTE and GALILEO exit.
ACTOR
The Ornament of Her Sex.

10.

CALAM ITY JANE enters.

CALAM ITY JANE
July 25, 1893
Dearest Janey,
I am leaving next week to join Bill Codys Wild West show. It is a good thing that you
dont know how your mother has to live out these hectic days. I mind my own business
but always remember that the one thing a world hates is a woman who minds her own
business. They are telling awful things about me. Every man I ever speak to Im accused
of being an immoral slut. Just because I took several different young boys under my wing
to help them while sick, the tongues wag. These other women who talk about me have
bastards and shotgun weddings. They are pot-bellied, hairy-legged and look like
something the cat dragged in! I wish I had the power to damn their souls to Hell!
Good night little girl and may God keep you from harm.
Your loving mama, Calamity Jane.
She exits, as OLYM PIAS enters.
ACTOR
Great men must still heed their mothers, even if they have conquered the world.
ACTOR
In 330 B.C., Alexander the Great received a scolding letter from his mother, Olympias,
who was none too pleased to hear that Alexander claimed his father to be Zeus.
OLYM PIAS
I must entreat you to be quiet and not to cast aspersions on me or bring accusations
against me before Hera. She will certainly bring some great calamity upon me if you
suggest in your letters that I have been her husbands mistress!
She exits. ELEANOR OF AQUITAINE enters.
ELEANOR OF AQUITAINE
To the reverend father and Supreme Pontiff, I, the commiserated Queen of England,
Duchess of Normandy, Countess of Anjou entreat him to show himself to be a father of
mercy to a pitiful mother.
ACTOR
On his return from the Crusades in 1192, Richard the Lionheart was captured and
imprisoned by King Leopold of Austria.

11.

ACTOR
A ransom of three million pounds was set for his release. Richards mother, Eleanor of
Aquitaine, demanded the Pope to come to her beloved sons rescue.
ELEANOR OF AQUITAINE
King Richard is detained in bonds, and his brother John depopulates the captives
kingdom with the sword and lays it waste with fire. In all things the Lord has become
cruel towards me. His anger is so against me that even my sons fight against each other, if
indeed it can be called a fight in which one languishes in bonds and the other, adding grief
upon grief, tries by cruel tyranny to usurp the exiles kingdom. Why do you so long
negligently, nay cruelly, delay to free my son, or is rather that you do not dare? Is your
power derived from God or from men? Perhaps you will say that this power is given to
you over souls, not bodies. So be it. I will certainly be satisfied if you bind the souls of
those who keep my son bound in prison. Three times you have promised to send us
legates, yet they have not been sent. What benefit did you gain from giving my simple
nature mere words? You alone, who were my hope after God, force me to despair. The
kings and princes of the Earth have conspired against my son, the Lords Anointed! If
the Church of Rome keeps quiet about the great injuries done to him, may God rise up
and judge our plea! Restore my son to me, oh man of God, if indeed you are a man of
God and not a man of mere blood!
ACTOR
The Pope did not answer Eleanors letter.
ACTOR
So at the age of 71, Eleanor herself went to Austria and negotiated for and won her sons
freedom.
ELEANOR OF AQUITAINE
Cursed be he who trusts in man!
She exits. VINCENT VAN GOGH enters.
VINCENT VAN GOGH
July 10, 1890
Dear M other,
When I fell ill, I could not resign myself to having to go into a hospital. But the shock of
the last two months makes me now feel like not leaving.

12.

ACTOR
Vincent Van Gogh turned to his brother, Theo, for help with finance and art. But Vincent
turned to his mother for help with his mind.
VINCENT VAN GOGH
It is difficult for me to say how far I have or have not recovered. I often feel much selfreproach, my illness being more or less my own fault. I attribute my last attack partly to
the influence which the illness of others had on me. So during the last fortnight I have
worked from morning till night without stopping. All this distraction has a favorable
effect. The symptoms of the disease, which are a sort of thermometer, have quite
disappeared. But I have learned not to count too much on this. At the moment I am
working on a portrait of one of the patients here. It is curious that after one has been
with them for some time, one does not think of them as being mad anymore.
I embrace you in my thoughts,
Your loving Vincent.
P.S.: Next door there is a whole family of Americans who paint away day in day out. I
havent seen any of their work yet. Its unlikely to be up to much.
He exits. SIDONIE and COLETTE enter.
SIDONIE
You have been so kind as to ask me to come to spend a week with you, and that I know,
means a week near my daughter whom I adore. I need not inform you how rarely I see
her and how much her presence enchants me. Nevertheless, I shall not accept your kind
invitation.
ACTOR
This note was written by Sidonie, the mother of famous French writer, Colette, to
Colettes husband at the time.
SIDONIE
And it is for this reason: my rose cactus seems as if it were about to flower. It is a very
rare plant, a gift, and, at least so I am told, blossoms in our climate only once every four
years. Now I am already a very old woman, and what if during my absence my rose
cactus were to blossom? I am certain I should never have the opportunity again.
ACTOR
A year later, Sidonie died at the age of seventy-seven. Colette honored her mother in a
later writing.

13.

COLETTE
During the hours when I feel myself inferior to everything about me, when my mediocrity
rises up against me, when I note with horror that my muscles are losing their vigor, that
my desires no longer sting, and even my grief has lost its cutting edge, I can still draw
myself up and say: I am the daughter of the woman who wrote that letter, who bent an
ecstatic wrinkled face among the daggers of a cactus and peered at the promise of a
flower, a woman, who herself flowered untiringly through three-quarters of a century.
SIDONIE and COLETTE exit. SYBIL
THORNDIKE enters.
SYBIL THORNDIKE
Well, weve done it! Weve flown! All the way from Croyden to Paris in a huge
airplane!
ACTOR
In 1927, acclaimed British actress Sybil Thorndike flew with her acting company to Paris.
She shared her adventure with her son, who had enlisted in the Navy.
SYBIL THORNDIKE
I was terrified and thrilled too, of course. Doesnt the earth look gorgeous from up there!
All those lovely fields and the comic little houses. Id taken lots of seasick pills in case,
but they didnt work and I was absolutely pea-green. Half-way over when I was thinking
I cant bear this another second, Tom Kealy passed me a message which said, Note
the cultivation of the land. I could have killed him. I didnt care about the cultivation of
anything!
JOHN ADAM S enters.
JOHN ADAM S
M ay 13, 1783
Dear Nabby,
I have long been of the opinion that when I hear of an extraordinary man, good or bad, I
naturally inquire who was his mother? There can be nothing in life more honorable for a
woman than to contribute by her virtues, her advice or her example, to the formation of a
husband or a son to be useful to the world.
SYBIL THORNDIKE
But I wasnt actually sick until we went down. As we got out we saw a huge crowd of
French people waving flowers and hats at us.

14.

SYBIL THORNDIKE (CONTD)

I just had time to dash into the Ladies and be very sick -- all my breakfast -- put on some
makeup and then come back and make a speech to them all -- in French! Well, lets hope
they all like the play. Hows your ship? Give my love to your nice captain!
Love and hugs,
M ummy
JOHN ADAM S
You will take care that you preserve your own character, and that you persevere in a
course of conduct worthy of the example that is every day before you.
SYBIL THORNDIKE
P.S.: Oh, isnt flying gorgeous! Wouldnt you love to be a pilot? Do they have airplanes
in the Navy?
JOHN ADAM S
Heaven has blessed you with a mother who is an ornament of her sex.
I am your affectionate father,
John Adams
SYBIL THORNDIKE
P.P.S.: The French are all darlings!
As SYBIL THORNDIKE and JOHN ADAM S
exit, a music cue plays. A photo of Hoagy
Carmichael is projected.
ACTOR
American composer Hoagy Carmichael was so moved by the letter of an anonymous
woman to her dead husband that he put her words to music.
The song -- I Get Along Without You Very Well
-- may be performed as a solo or a duet between
a man and a woman.
ACTOR
I get along without you
Very well. Of course I do.
Except when soft rains fall and
Drip from leaves then I recall
The thrill of being sheltered in

15.

Your arms. Of course I do.

But I get along without
You very well.
Ive forgotten you just like
I should. Of course I have.
Except to hear your name
Or someones laugh that is
The same
But Ive forgotten you
Just like I should.
What a guy, what a fool am I
To think my breaking heart
Could kid the moon?
Whats in store?
Should I phone once more?
No, its best that I stick
To my tune.
I get along without you
Very well.
ACTOR
The Shortness of This Blessing.
SAM UEL CLEM ENS and DR. LES
PARROTT enter.
SAM UEL CLEM ENS
Buffalo, New York, November 12, 1870
Dear Uncle and Aunt,
ACTOR
Using the pen name M ark Twain, M ississippi boatsman Samuel Clemens brought to
life two of the most famous boys in American literature, Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry
Finn.
ACTOR
The proud papa composed a birth announcement for his first and only son, Langdon.

16.

SAM UEL CLEM ENS

I came into the world on the 7th and consequently am about five days old now. At birth
I only weighed four-and-a-half pounds, with my clothes on. And the clothes were the
chief feature of the weight too, I am obliged to confess. But I am doing finely, all things
considered. I was at a standstill for three days and a half, but during the last twenty-four
hours, I have gained nearly an ounce.
DR. LES PARROTT
Just seven nights ago you came into this world three months ahead of schedule, weighing
just one and a half pounds. Your entire body can fit in one of my hands. M y wedding
band can easily slip over your entire arm and up to your shoulder.
ACTOR
One hundred years later, Dr. Les Parrott wrote his own premature son from the neonatal
unit in a Seattle hospital.
DR. LES PARROTT
The tubes, monitors, lights and alarms surrounding your bed dont faze you much, but
the medical saff give them and you constant attention. The doctors tell us that only a
very small percentage of babies your size enter the world the way you did. This very
fact sets up a series of hurdles too numerous to mention.
SAM UEL CLEM ENS
They all say I look very old and venerable. And I am aware myself that I never smile.
Life seems a serious thing, made up mainly of hiccups, unnecessary washings and colic.
But no doubt you who are old have long since accustomed and reconciled to what seems
to me such a disagreeable novelty.
DR. LES PARROTT
You are learning far too early that life isnt always easy, that circumstances can justify a
negative attitude if we let them. But I promise you that a negative attitude is a luxury
youll never be able to afford. The price is always defeat and failure. I love you so much,
and Im optimistic about your future. When you are old enough and begin to see the
value of a positive attitude in meeting lifes challenges, I want you to visit a neonatal unit.
I want you to see how far youve come. And if youre willing, Id like to make that visit
with you.
SAM UEL CLEM ENS
M y little mother is very bright and cheery, and I guess she is pretty happy,
notwithstanding she is sick abed.
Very lovingly, Langdon Clemens

17.

DR. LES PARROTT

For right now, dear son, I ask only that you rest. Tomorrow holds enough challenges for
your tiny frame.
SAM UEL CLEM ENS
P.S.: Father said I better write because you would be more interested in me just now than
in the rest of the family.
ACTOR
Langdon Clemens died on June 2, 1872, at only 19 months old.
SAM UEL CLEM ENS and DR. LES PARROT
exit, as PLUTARCH enters.
PLUTARCH
Plutarch to his wife, greetings. The messenger you sent to tell me of the death of our
little daughter must have gone astray on the way to Athens. Those who were at her
funeral tell me with surprise that you made no alteration in your dress, nor put any
trappings of woe either upon your maids or yourself, and that there was no costly
display, but that everything was done with silence and restraint. I myself am not
surprised, for if you thought any display useless even in matters of pleasure, you would
naturally be frugal and unostentatious in grief. But I understand the magnitude of our
loss. The two years of our daughters life must be placed among our blessings as a source
of joy and pleasure. And we must not count the shortness of this blessing an evil, nor be
ungrateful to Fortune for her gift, if our enjoyment of it was shorter than we wished.
He exits. Reprise of I Get Along Without You
Very Well.
ACTOR
What a guy, what a fool am I
To think my breaking heart
Could kid the moon
Whats in store?
Should I phone once moer?
No. Its best that I stick
To my tune.
I get along without you
Very well. Of course I do
Except perhaps in Spring but

18.

I should never think of Spring

For that would surely break
M y heart in two.
M usic cue fades.
ACTOR
One M ore, Lower Still.
KATHERINE M ANSFIELD enters.
ACTOR
Letters have sometimes kept families together in unexpected ways. Consider this note
from New Zealand-born writer, Katherine M ansfield.
KATHERINE M ANSFIELD
M arch 24, 1921
Dear Princess Bibesco,
I am afraid you must stop writing these little love letters to my husband while he and I
live together. It is one of the things which is not done in our world. You are very young.
Wont you ask your husband to explain to you the impossibility of the situation? Please
do not make me have to write to you again. I don not like scolding people and I simply
hate having to teach them manners.
Yours sincerely, Katherine M ansfield
DOROTHY THOM PSON enters.
ACTOR
Katherine M ansfield was not the only literary wife who had decided enough was enough.
ACTOR
Dorothy Thompson replies to a young womans offer to take care of everything for her
husband.
DOROTHY THOM PSON
M y dear M iss,
M y husband already has a stenographer who handles his work for him. And as for
everything, I take care of that myself. And when I say everything, I mean everything.
Dorothy Thompson. M rs. Sinclair Lewis to you.
They exit. LADY SHIGENARI enters.

19.

LADY SHIGENARI
To Lord Shigenari, Governor of Nagato
From His Wife
ACTOR
In 16th century Japan, Lord Kimura Shigenari left for war. His wife believed it would be
their last parting.
LADY SHIGENARI
I know that when two wayfarers take shelter under the same tree and slake their thirst in
the same river it has all been determined by their karma from a previous life.. For the
past few years you and I have shared the same pillow as man and wife who had intended
to live and grow old together, and I have become as attached to you as your own shadow.
But I have now abandoned all hope about our future together in this world, and have
resolved to take the ultimate step while you are still alive. I shall be waiting for you at
the end of what they call the road to death.
She exits, as EVELYN WAUGH enters.
EVELYN WAUGH
Tell you what you might do while you are alone. You might think about whether you
could bear the idea of marrying me.
ACTOR
In 1936, Evelyn Waugh, author of Brideshead Revisited, was on a journalistic
assignment in Ethiopia when he proposed marriage to Laura Herbert.
EVELYN WAUGH
I cant advise you in favor because I think it would be beastly for you, but think how nice
it would be for me! I am restless and moody and misanthropic and lazy and have no
money except what I earn and if I got ill, you would starve. In fact, its a lousy
proposition. On the other hand, I think I could reform and become quite strict about not
getting drunk and I am pretty sure I should be faithful. Also there is always a fair chance
that there will be another big economic crash in which case if you had married a nobleman
with a great house, you might find yourself starving, while I am very clever and could
probably earn a living of some sort somewhere. Also, I have practically no living
relatives except one brother, whom I scarcely know. All these are very small advantages
compared with the awfulness of my character. I have always tried to be nice to you and
you may have got it in your head that I am nice really, but that is all rot.

20.

EVELYN WAUGH (CONTD)

Just turn the matter over in your dear head.
All my love, Evelyn.
ACTOR
Laura accepted Evelyns proposal. They were happily married for many years.
EVELYN WAUGH exits. NAPOLEON and
QUEEN VICTORIA enter.
NAPOLEON
I have not spent a day without loving you. I have not spent a night without embracing
you.
QUEEN VICTORIA
How happy do you make me with your love! Oh, my angel Albert, I do not deserve such
love! Never, never did I think I could be loved so much.
ACTOR
Napoleon Bonaparte was a brilliant tactician of war, a merciless dictator and the lover of a
legendary beauty.
ACTOR
Queen Victoria was a brilliant politician, merciless in her moral righteousness, and she too
was a passionate lover.
ACTOR
Who knew they had so much in common?
NAPOLEON
In the midst of my duties, whether I am at the head of my army or inspecting the camps,
my beloved Josephine stands alone in my heart, occupies my head, fills my thoughts.
Yet in your letter you call me vous! Vous yourself! Ah, wretch, how could you have
written this letter? How cold it is! Ah, my love, that vous those four days made me long
for my former indifference. Hell has no torments great enough! Nor do the Furies have
serpents enough! Vous! M y spirit is heavy, my heart is fettered and I am terrified by
my fantasies. One day you will love me no longer. That day will mark the last day of
my life. If my heart were base enough to love without being loved in return, I would tear
it to pieces.

21.

QUEEN VICTORIA
M y mind is quite made up, dear uncle, and I told Albert this morning of it. I love him
more than I can say, and I shall do everything in my power to render the sacrifice he has
made -- for a sacrifice in my opinion it is -- as small as I can. M y feelings are little
changed, I must say, since last Spring, when I said I couldnt think of marrying for three
or four years, but seeing Albert has changed all this. Alberts beauty is most striking.
NAPOLEON
M y soul is wracked with conflicting forces. I am full of fears which prostrate me with
misery. I am distressed to be calling you by name. I shall wait for you to write it.
QUEEN VICTORIA
Already the second day since our marriage. His love and gentleness is beyond everything,
and to kiss that dear soft cheek, to press my lips to his, is heavenly bliss. I feel a purer
more unearthly feel than I ever did. Oh, was ever a woman so blessed as I am! M y
dearest Albert put on my stockings for me. I went in and saw him shave: a great delight
for me.
NAPOLEON
A kiss on the heart, and one lower down, and one more, even lower still.
They exit.
ACTOR
Still The Great Kid.