The 4 Deadly Sins of Writing

Everyone writes. Its almost completely inevitable in almost every career. So youre a doctor?
You will probably write research papers to gain notoriety and credibility. So youre an engineer?
You will write up proposals and presentations. So youre a lawyer? You would be lying to
yourself if you think you can get out of writing memos, reports, and depositions. Its not just

Comment [LA1]: Watch out for vague

pronouns! What if we said writing or
putting pen to paper (or fingers to
keyboard)
Comment [LA2]: Notoriety has a negative
connotation; lets replace it with
reknownand maybe say credibility and
reknown.

English majors and people aspiring to be the next J. K. Rowling that arent the only ones who
need to know how to properly put words on paper properly. Whether its books, reports,
dissertations, speeches, memos, or simply emails, everyone writes.
If youre not a writer, why is it important to pay attention to the quality of your
writing?So why is it important to recognize that everyone writes? Because everyone writes, you
need to know these sins because everyone also reads. You know that every sentence starts with a
capital letter and ends with a period, right? So what matters as long as the message is
understood? I can tell you: wWhether a person the people who read your writing areis a grammar
Nazis or a high school dropouts, there are certain patterns of writing that can make anyonewill
make them cringe and want to stop reading whatever it is. For the well-being of your career, you
need to know how to avoid these patterns. And that brings me toI call them the 4 four dDeadly
sSins of wWriting.
Theres oOne thing that you must know: these deadly sins are not deadly not because
they are grammatically incorrect, but. Grammar Nazis will find errors anywhere they can read,
but these sins are deadly because they arent ruled by grammar. These sins are errors because
they confuse readers and cause miscommunication between persons. Because everyone writes,
you need to know these sins because everyone also reads.
1. Comma Usage

Comment [LA3]: Could any of our readers

be offended by the mention of Nazis? We
could say grammar gurus instead.

Yes, the dreaded comma. In elementary school, you probably learned that a comma indicates a
pause at the end of a clause and before the nextbetween clauses. But what they didnt tell you is
that commas are only used at the end of a clause and before the next onlybetween clauses if the
two clauses are joined by a coordinating conjunction (but, and, for, nor), or that commas are also
used to set off parentheticals, non-restrictive clauses, introductory adverbials, interjections,
coordinate adjectives, and more. You may have learned later that, contrary to what you learned
in elementary school, the comma before and in a list may or may not be needed. But with all of
these various responsibilities for the comma, the first deadly sin is this: overusing the comma.
When you learned that you need to put a comma at the end of a clause, you probably also
learned that a good way to gauge if you need to use a comma is if you pause while reading a
sentence. Some teachers like to say that commas are like a breath-mark in writing. However, if

Comment [LA4]: This paragraph might be

confusing/difficult for the readers, who will
mostly be non-writers obligated to write in
their careers (according to the intro). How
about we replace it with something more
general? For example:
Throughout your schooling, you probably
learned a long list of contradictory rules
about commas. And if youre like most
people, you probably learned that a good
way to gauge [and pick it up from there]

you arent reading a musical score or poetry, you should not use commas as breath-marks. Using
commas every time that you need to breathe would cause you to overuse commas extensively.
Commas should be used judiciously, not just because you have run out of breath.
Too many commas in a sentence can confuse readers and make them wonder what you
are really trying to say. The main use for commas is to indicate which information is essential
and which is not. Consider this: commas are used to set off non-restrictive clauses from the main

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clause of a sentence. Non-restrictive clauses are used to give extra information in a sentence,

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similar to appositives. These clauses should not be confused with restrictive clauses that are not
set off by commas. Restrictive clauses give information that is not extra but is imperative to
comprehend the sentence. For example: Consider the difference between these sentences:
1. The man who smiled at me was kind.

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2. is an example of a restrictive clause that specifies only the man who smiled at me

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was kind. However, The man, who smiled at me, was kind.
In the first sentence, which has no commas, the information (the man smiled, the man was kind)
is all of equal value. This sentence specifies that only the man who smiled at me was kind. It
gives an example of restrictive clauses, which are not set off by commas. is an example of a
restrictive clause that specifies only the man who smiled at me was kind. However, in the
second sentence, the smiling does not restrict the meaningit is just is an example of a nonrestrictive clause that specifies that just a certain man was kind who also happened to smile at
methe smiling is the extra information. That sentence is an example of a nonrestrictive clause,
so it must have commas. A sentence like the following really illustrates the importance of

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distinguishing between restrictive and nonrestrictive clauses:But what happens in a sentence

such as this:
3. The man, who smiled at me, which I thought was strange, especially after I

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remembered I hadnt brushed my hair, was kind.

In this sentence, tThere are so many commas and non-restrictive clauses that the reader
becomes confused.
Too many commas cause clutter, bBut there are also negative consequences with for
using too few commas. Consider this: The man who tripped me down the street was not very
kind. Did the man trip me all the way down the street, or was the man who tripped me down the
street from where I stood? This is the ambiguity that is caused by lack of commas.
So how do you know when to use a comma and when to notnot to use a comma? There
are a few four basic rules that govern the comma, and then the rest is up to personal choice and
aesthetics. First of all, please use the Ooxford comma, the one that comes before and in a list.

Comment [LA5]: Example sentence #3

seems to be more a problem of too much
information and a less a problem of too
many commas, so readers might not find it
relevant. But if we want to keep it in, lets
propose a solution for the problem at the
end of this paragraph.
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Comment [LA6]: It seems like adding
commas would make for an ungrammatical
sentence. But what if we used this
sentence?
The man down the street who tripped me
was not very kind.
(The man down the street, who tripped me,
was not very kind. Did the man trip me, or
did the street?!)
Alsodoes it count as using too few
commas to have no commas at all?

For example, doctors, therapists, and entrepreneurs love to use commas. . Unless you are a
journalist and youre forced to abandon that sacred last comma before and in a list, the Ooxford
comma eliminates ambiguity and risk for additional errors. Secondly, be aware of your nonrestrictive clauses so you dont accidentally forget a comma in a sentences like this: John loves
his wife Betty. and makeLeaving out a comma here him a polygamist (no comma here makes
this a restrictive clause, indicating that John specifically loves his wife Betty in comparison to
any other wives). We just turned John into a polygamist! Thirdly, use commas to set off
introductory phrases like in this sentence. And fourthly, do your elementary school teacher
proud, and use commas before coordinatinge conjunctions (but, and, for, nor) so that you avoid
run-on sentences. But please, save breath-mark commas for music.

Comment [LA7]: I like this comment; its

funny.

2. Ambiguous Pronoun Reference

This is that thing that no one likes because it is confusing for them. The concept of pPronoun
reference concerns the words that replace ideas expressed previously. It seems pretty simple:

Comment [LA8]: Lets put this in

parentheses so that readers are alerted that
its just an example.
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instead of repeating nouns, that you use pronouns. instead of repeating nouns like David

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practiced the piano so David could get better., but But in long passages, you can easily lose
readers in the a maze of words like his, hers, and theirs. While you dont want to sound
repetitive, above all, you dont wantyour main goal is to keep readers from getting confused your
readers to get confused. When youre talking about this and that, you cant have your readers
asking, What is this person talking about?
Pronouns are replacement words, so the most important thing to remember is that
pronouns need something to replace: the an antecedent. As long as you make sure that the
antecedent is clear for each pronoun, you will stay clear away from this writing sin. Make sure
that every this and that is referring to an actual things. , and every that can be linked to an object.

Comment [LA9]: Here, perhaps we should

offer a solution and mention that the best
way to make antecedents clear is just to add
the object (or a simplified version of it) after
the pronoun, so this becomes this
problem, that becomes that question,
etc.

Take a look at the first sentence of this section. What is this? What is it? Who is them? The

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sentence is full of pronouns that have no antecedents. You Readers are left wondering what the

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sentence is about, why no one likes this ambiguous thing, and who it is that is concerned about
this thing. Ambiguous pronouns with no antecedents are a leading cause of confusion and
miscommunication in writing..
3. Long Subjects and Long Sentences
One of the most annoying things that no one really likes but is actually pretty common when you

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look at it is long subjects and also long sentences that go on and on and you cant really know
whatere they are saying because they just keep going, and youre not sure if its a run-on

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sentence or where you got lost since you dont remember how this sentence began. Going back
to your school writing training, you probably learned in middle school that it is a good thing to
vary the length of your sentences. But the one common, deadly sin of writing is using often
extremely long sentences that lose your and frustrate the reader. and make them frustrated
because they cant follow what youre trying to say.
Often, the sin of writing sentences that are too long is a result of havingbecause their
subjects that are too long. For exampleConsider this example:
1. The smiling of the man who tripped me yesterday while I brushed through my hair
made me uneasy.
This convoluted sentence could be simplified and broken up into smaller sentences that are easier
to understand. First, the subject could be simplified to the mans smiling, and connected
quickly to the verb and object: The smiling mans smiling made me uneasy. And the rest of the
information about the subject can be delivered in a separate sentence: The smiling mans
smiling made me uneasy. He tripped me yesterday while I was brushing through my hair.

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There is no good reason to make your sentences and subjects long. Even Ccomplex ideas
can be communicated if you just take things are best communicated one small portion at a time.
If you want your readers to stay engaged, in what you are writing and to understand, and not get
lost, then use proper punctuation, and break up your long sentences, and simplify your subjects.
Your middle school teacher was right: you should vary your sentence length, but dont forget to
make sure that your sentences dont have subject that are too long and confuse your readers.not
at the expense of clarity.
4. Apostrophes
Please, oh please, do not mix up its and its. Have you heard of shibboleths? They are

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certain words, mistakes, or phrases that indicate to educated people that you are uneducated or
unsophisticated. The mMisuse of apostrophes is a shibboleth, and it discredits you immediately.
But thankfully, out of all of the deadly sins of writing, this is the one most governed by grammar
and also the easiest to follow. You need to only know these simple rules Tto avoid committing

Comment [LA10]: Here is one reason it

seems untrue to claim that the 4 deadly sins
arent grammar-related.

this sin, you need only know these simple rules:

1. Its without an apostrophe is the possessive pronoun of it.
1.a. The evergreen never loses its needles.
2. Its is a contraction of it is.
2.a. Baby, its cold outside.

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3. An apostrophe is not used to make things plural.

3.a.My parents ate lots of apples in the 80s (no apostrophes!).

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4. In contractions, apostrophes replace an omitted letter and are not placed randomly.
4.a. Could not couldnt; would not wouldnt; should not shouldnt.
Thats mostly it. Follow the above guidelines, and youre set.

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So there it is: The 4 Deadly Sins of Writing. Are you surprised that they dont really have to do
with grammar? This is because most people understand grammar intuitively. You know that
sentences begin with a capital letter and end in a period, remember? You also know what order
words should go in and what makes sentences into a question and other grammatical things
without knowing how to diagram sentences like a grammarian. Since most people know how to

Comment [LA11]: Yes, it seems like they

actually do involve grammar. Or at least
punctuationwhich for many readers is, I
think, equivalent in difficulty.
Comment [LA12]: Deadly sin!
Comment [LA13]: Lets change this; these
are principles of punctuation, not grammar,
but they follow a sentence about grammar.

write basically, the deadly sins that kill your writing deal with style. It is the sentence structure
and small details that make or break whether your readers will understand you and want to read
more. These are little details that many people struggle with, but ironically are easy to fix. If you
ever feel that you cannot see the deadly sins in your own writing, consider hiring an editor to
find them for youtheyre even better than the grammar Nazis.

Comment [LA14]: Since Im worried about

the way readers will react to Nazis, here are
some other options we could try:
they are the ultimate grammar gurus
they specialize in repentance (haha jk)
they can sniff out shibboleths from miles
away.
they deal with deadly sins daily.
(or please think of a better one!)