Justin Olmstead Middle Years Teaching Unit

Justin Olmstead 4492529
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Middle years teaching unit
Short film pre-production
Year levels: 7-12 in an alternative/VCAL school
This unit is designed to be the first in a three-part filmmaking unit and is
partially based on a film project I developed (at the request of the Head of
Campus) at my placement school, St. Josephs Flexible Learning Centre (SJFLC).
Students at SJFLC are vulnerable and experience a complexity of inter-related
needs
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and seek to re-engage with learning or even just a regular routine. Many of
SJFLCs students have suffered significant trauma, avoided or been unable to attend
mainstream schools for a significant period of time, and are dealing with
drug/alcohol/police issues. These factors impact on students ability to concentrate
or remain motivated in class. Many are also illiterate with low-level numeracy
skills. But, what they lack in formal education, they make up for with their honesty,
courage and perseverance within extremely challenging circumstances.
With the above in mind, I developed this film project and subsequent unit for a
number of reasons:
- to introduce the students to filmmaking as a medium of self-
expression

- to encourage them to think about what their schools four core
principles (Honesty, Safe and Legal, Participation, Respect) mean to
them

- to provide students with the opportunity to write creatively

- to provide students with opportunities to complete VCAL outcomes
(reading for self expression, writing for self expression, writing for
instruction, oracy for self expression, oracy for knowledge, oracy for
practical purposes, personal development)

- to give students an opportunity to work on a group project

- to expose them to the skills and duties required of the various film
roles

- to demystify the filmmaking process and show students that, with
todays affordable cameras (and even smart phones) and video editing
equipment, anybody can make a film
The unit incorporates social, verbal, and visual learning, as well as a limited
selection of solitary analysis tasks. Group discussions and verbal responses to
visual cues are encouraged as the initial step, followed by time to put these
answers in writing. The majority of the unit is designed to be completed during

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Youth Plus website
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class time, because most of the students arent able/inclined to complete
homework, or take risks creatively.
One of the important things I learned while completing this film project at SJFLC
was that I had to actively keep the students motivated and encourage them to take
chances with creative pursuits such as scriptwriting and storyboarding. Many of
them had been told they were no good or had suffered other trauma in their lives,
which made this creative process seem daunting. This meant that, for example,
when I asked them to develop a story plot in their own time, many of them failed to
start. As a result, I drove most lessons from start to finish.

LESSON ONE - Introduction
This lesson introduces students to expressing themselves through film, and gives
students the chance to discuss what the four principles mean to them.
VCAL outcomes: Oracy for self expression
Preparation:
Write example Four principles skit
Print copies of Four principles skit
Materials:
- A short film (I used my film A Short Length of Hose, for ease of use) on
USB stick
- and laptop to show short film
Procedure:
1) Movie brainstorm. Students are asked:
- What are your favourites? Why?
- Whats good about movies?
- Whats the difference between a good movie and a bad one?
- How are movies different to words in a magazine or on a website?
2) Show short film A Short Length of Hose
http://justinolmstead.com/A-SHORT-LENGTH-OF-HOSE
Ask students what the film was about and what worked and what didnt.
Ask them what preparation they think went into making this film.
3) Introduce the Four Principles Short Film Project. Discuss possible reasons
for making this film. Emphasise: having a say in building the culture of the
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school, exploring and representing which principle they value most, and that a
film will remain even when they have moved on from the school.
To arouse interest, explain that the film can be uploaded to SJFLCs YouTube
channel or Facebook page, to show other schools how they operate at SJFLC. This
will, in turn, encourage others to make a video reply in response to theirs.
4) Talk about the four principles and what they mean to them. What does
respect mean? What does safe and legal mean etc.
5) Students vote on the principle they would like to explore in a short film.
6) Two student volunteers (or myself and another teacher) perform Four
Principles Film Project skit.
If time permits, the story Jim the florist can be read aloud by students (or the
teacher) and the class can discuss character development in the story.
To facilitate discussion, students are asked:
- How are the characters developed?
- Were any of the four core principles represented in the skit?
* * * *

Four Principles Film Project skit
A student, TIMMY sits on a chair, with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth next to
a NO-SMOKING sign, and a permanent marker in his hand.
A teacher comes along and notices the cigarette in the students mouth.
TEACHER
Youve got a choice to make, Timmy.
TIMMY
What you mean?
TEACHER
This is a non-smoking area.
TIMMY
Yeah, but Im not inhaling.
TEACHER
Thats not the point. Somebody else could inhale your passive smoke.
TIMMY
If they dont get too close we wont have a problem.
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TEACHER
Come on, Timmy. You know what to do.
TIMMY
Youve got a point, I guess.
The student scribbles over the NO part of the NO SMOKING sign and looks very
happy with himself.
TEACHER
Oh, I wish you didnt do that.
TIMMY
Why? I thought two wrongs made acrap?
TEACHER
Actually, no they dont, Timmy. Looks like well have to have a re-entry meeting.
TIMMY
Ok, Ill be sure to make a RE-ENTRY about that in my diary.
TEACHER
Thats not very respectful, Timmy.
TIMMY
Look, Im hungry. Whens lunch?!
TEACHER
How about we have a quick chat tomorrow about your behaviour. Make sure you
have breakfast.
TIMMY
No worries, Ill have an extra bong just for you!
TEACHER
Thats not funny, Timmy. Well speak tomorrow

THE END
* * * *

Jim the florist
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Jim the florist sits in his shop, pruning some roses. Gladys, an old lady who looks
like she has spilled a McDonalds soft serve down the front of her silky shirt,
walks into the florist and starts sniffing the flowers quite loudly and violently.
Good morning, offers Jim.
Doesnt smell like it, Gladys grumbles.
Try the lavender, Jim says, confused.
Jim notices Gladys being a bit rough with his flowers but, since shes quite old, he
decides to leave her alone. Gladys looks over at Jim every so often as she sniffs
the flowers. While Jim takes a phone call, Gladys opens her handbag and shoves a
small bouquet of petunias into it.
As Gladys begins to waddle toward the front door of the florist, Gladys sneezes
with a violent, high-pitched shriek and her handbag droops open, exposing the
petunias. Jim hangs up the phone as notices Gladys trying to shove the petunias
back into her handbag.
Jim, not wanting to lose his temper, takes a deep breath, and steps out from
behind the counter.
Let me wrap those for you, Jim sneers at Gladys.
Gladys stops in her tracks, aware that shes been caught. Desperate, she tries a
new tactic.
Look, Imold, Gladys whines.
So is my dog, quips Jim.
Icant afford them, Gladys whines, defeated.
And I cant afford to strangle another old lady. Its bad for business, replies Jim.
Gladys, taken aback, starts to take the flowers out of her handbag.
You wouldnthurt Gladys stutters, nervously.
Oh yeah? When was the last time you saw dear old Doris at Bingo?
Gladys gasps. Jim smiles at Gladys knowingly and takes the flowers from her
shaky hands.
Gladys stumbles out of the florist, backwards, eyeing Jim fearfully.

LESSON TWO Creating characters
The students study character development in a short film.
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Materials:
- Character worksheet
- Link to short film Lemonade stand
VCAL outcomes: Oracy for self expression, oracy for knowledge
Procedure:
1) Show Lemonade stand short film.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9JL82j-l6hM
Students are asked the following questions at the end of the film:
- What did they think of it?
- How did this film develop characters?
- How?
- Which character or characters made the story move forward?
- What was the moral of the story?

2) Introduce the lesson.
Were going to be looking at creating characters from scratch, using different
questions that will help define the characters and determine what they will want
and how they will act in the story (and subsequent script) that we write as a
class.
3) Students are handed Character worksheet and its explained that they
must choose a character from Lemonade stand. We will watch the film again and
this time they must fill out the worksheet about their chosen character.
- the film is paused periodically and students are asked about their
progress, and to give them time to formulate answers

4) When the film is finished, the students answers are reviewed orally.
Students are asked why they made their choices.
5) The students are informed that, in the next class, we will be using the
same character worksheets to construct the main character(s) for their short
film script.
* * * *
Name:
Character worksheet
Name of character:
Age:
Personality type (5 things):
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What makes them happy (3 things)?
What do they want?
How do they try to get it?
Biggest strengths (3 things):
Biggest fears (3 things):
What makes them laugh?
Do they have difficult things to deal with?
What makes them angry (3 things)?
How do they deal with conflict or change?
What are their habits/hobbies (3 things)?
What are they most proud of, about themselves?
Do they always tell the truth?
Do they get what they want at the end of the movie?

LESSON THREE Creating characters II
Students continue to learn about creating characters by studying how some
short films achieve it.
VCL outcomes: Oracy for self expression, oracy for knowledge
Procedure:
1) Show short film as an example of character development and plot conflict:
http://www.shortoftheweek.com/2013/09/26/one-mans-loss/
2) Questions are asked relating to the film:
Is the rich man a good person? Why?
Is the woman a good person?
What did the homeless man say to woman when she asked him if he drove?
What would the other man have said to her? Would he have asked her where she
wanted to go?
Is there conflict in this film?
How is the conflict resolved?
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Who benefits from the conflict?
3) Introduction Today were working on creating characters. If we know
who the characters are, it will help us decide what they will do in each situation
and how they will react to other characters in our film.
4) The Character Worksheet is projected onto a whiteboard (to be filled in
manually by the teacher)
OR
The elements of the Character Worksheet are written on the whiteboard.
The students are asked to think of a name for the main character of their film.
As a class, with the teacher facilitating discussion, each element of the Character
Worksheet is completed. The answers will be slow to come at first but, when a
general picture of the character begins to be painted, the students will be more
confident in their answers and instinctively know about the character based on
what has already been attributed to them. (This is a painstaking but necessary
part of the screenwriting process at a school like SJFLC and can take upwards of a
full lesson)
The process is repeated for any other characters the students decide to add to
the film.
To reiterate the point about character development and conflict resolution, show
second film: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YYYeb1cRAAg
Questions arising from the film:
What was this film about?
What was the main character thinking?
Do we get to know the main character?
What about the other characters?
What makes a good character?
What makes a good film?
Is there conflict in the film?
NB I think its very important to show an example (or two) of movies that dont
work that dont have character development or that dont go anywhere. Students
can often learn a lot from the bad movies, and identify things they will want to
avoid in their own films. Its important to discuss statements like the sound was
bad or the camerawork was poor, to get students thinking about what goes into
each shot and scene.

LESSON FOUR Plot structure part I
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The basic elements of a short films plot structure are explored through
PowerPoint presentations and
Procedure:
1) The basic structure of (most) short films is explained via a PowerPoint
presentation (below). Part one of the presentation covers the idea of a character
wanting something, trying to get it, and either succeeding or failing in this
pursuit due to various factors.
Part two of the presentation provides two very simple examples of the plot
structure that students will be working with on this film project.
2) Nursery rhymes handout is circulated and students are given time to
complete.
Plot PowerPoint presentation Part one:

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Part two of presentation:
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LESSON FIVE Plot structure part II
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Students use a basic plot structure exercise to begin the writing of their short
film.
VCAL outcomes: Writing for self expression
Materials:
- Hamburger writing structure handouts
Procedure:
1) The previous lessons basic plot structure is reviewed and the students
explanations of each stage are written on the whiteboard. (e.g. conflict could be
when two characters fight over a piece of cake)
2) Working with the theme of the core principle (e.g. safe and legal) that
was chosen in the first lesson, students are given time to think of plot elements
for the sections of the hamburger plan, based on any ideas they have about the
main character(s) and what he/she/they want.
3) After students have had time to complete the hamburger plan, theyre
asked to share their ideas with the class. The ideas are written on the
whiteboard. The ideas are discussed and critiqued for their believability and
entertainment value.
Students then vote for the plot ideas that they like most. These plot ideas will
form the basis of the screenplay that will be written in subsequent lessons.

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LESSON SIX Screenplays
Students are introduced to the official screenplay format and learn about what
information is included in it.
VCAL outcomes: Oracy for knowledge
Materials:
- Copies of short film screenplay to hand out
- Copy of same screenplay on USB stick for projection onto whiteboard
- Short film (Disco Biscuits) on USB stick or YouTube link
Procedure:
1) A short film screenplay is projected onto the whiteboard and also a copy
of the screenplay is handed out, to be viewed in pairs.
I used one of my own, Disco Biscuits, for accessibility reasons. Alternatively, a film
popular with the students could be substituted here, which might arouse even more
interest. This would be contingent upon the online availability of the films
screenplay. Another consideration would be trying to please everyone, which would
definitely be difficult. Also, students familiarity might cause more of a distraction
than a motivator.
Headings and descriptions are discussed and students questions are answered.
2) The short film Disco Biscuits (produced from this screenplay) is played
over the projector and students are asked to follow along with it via the
screenplay. The film is stopped intermittently to ensure that students are
keeping up and understand what elements from the screenplay are represented
on the screen.
3) The students are asked the following questions, to invite discussion:
- What are the different types of information included in a screenplay?
- Who uses the screenplay during film production?
- What is the value of a screenplay?

LESSON SEVEN - Scriptwriting
The class will write the short film script as a class group.
VCAL outcomes: Writing for self expression, writing for practical purposes
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Materials:
- laptop with Celtx scriptwriting software
- copies of Character worksheets
- copies of students hamburger writing plans
- plot structure PowerPoint presentation
Procedure:
1) The teacher quickly refreshes the students on plot structure, showing the
PowerPoint presentation, which clearly shows the introduction, problem, conflict,
climax, and resolution stages.
The teacher then asks students what happens at each stage. When he/she is
satisfied that the students understand the concept, they move on.
2) The teacher projects the Celtx scriptwriting software on the whiteboard
and explains that he/she will input the details that the class agrees upon for each
scene.
The teacher informs the students that one page of script equals roughly one
minute of film time, and so he/she must be concise when writing the script. A
limit of 5-6 pages is negotiated with the students, to ensure a manageable
project.
3) The teacher then begins asking questions about the short film, including:
Where does the first scene take place?
Who is in the first scene?
What are they doing?
What do they want?
The students will begin slowly adding elements to the story and will delight in
seeing their script take shape projected on the whiteboard.
The teacher may need to evaluate the plot structure that is being constructed, or
remind students of the time constraints they are limited to.
This process may take more than one lesson, depending on the level of
agreement on key elements in the script. A voting system should be uitlised for
elements that cause disagreements.

LESSON EIGHT Camera shots
Students are introduced to the types and uses of different camera shots in films.
Preparation:
- Find film on YouTube to study
- Write up and find film stills to use for the Film shots worksheet
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- Print copies of Film shots worksheet
- Print copies of Shot types list
Procedure:
1) Introduce camera shots as images that appear on the screen in a film.
Explain to students that they will soon have to make choices for which shots they
use in their own film.
Show a scene from a film on YouTube. Instruct the students to count the number
of different camera shots.
(Its best to choose a scene that includes a lot of different camera shots. It may be
a popular idea to ask students to choose a favourite film to use for this exercise.
This is fine unless the scene has very few shots to study)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HwSKkKrUzUk
2) When the film scene is finished, ask students:
- How many shots did you count?
- What types of shots did you see?
- What was the most powerful shot?
3) Replay the film scene, this time pausing on different types of shots, and
explain what theyre called and what they are used for/the effect they have on a
films viewers in a film. For example: a wide shot of a landscape is called a wide
shot, and its used to show the audience where the action is taking place, to
establish the scene.
Pause on shots like over the shoulder, point of view, mid shot, close up, extreme
close up, and explain what theyre called and what theyre used for.
4) Circulate copies of the Film types list and Film shots worksheet. Work
through the first couple of shots with students as a group and then explain that
students must complete the Film shots worksheet while referring to the Shot
types list.
5) Correct and discuss the Film shots worksheet as a class.
NB at this stage of pre-production its possible to send small groups of students
out with cameras, tripods, and the Shot types list to experiment and try shooting
different types of shot. This practical exercise was very well received at SJFLC and
sparked some previously indifferent students interest in the project. Some realized
they had a talent for camera work and shot composition. When we reviewed their
footage they especially enjoyed seeing themselves and discussing their shooting
attempts. I would deliberately leave this kind of activity until very late in the pre-
production phase because, once students have a taste for practical film work, they
might not be as motivated nor see the value in hours of preparation time.
* * * *
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Shot types list

Film shots worksheet
1. Name these camera shots and describe what effect they have in a film.
Shot type:

Effect:
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Shot type:

Effect:

Shot type:

Effect:

Shot type:

Effect:

Shot type:
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Effect:

Shot type:

Effect:

Shot type:

Effect:

Shot type:
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Effect:

Shot type:

Effect:

Shot type:

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Effect:

Follow up questions
Why is it important to use different camera angles and shots in a film?
Why is important to plan a film before you start filming with a camera?
What are some ways we can learn about a character?
Why is it important to know what your character is thinking in every scene?

LESSON NINE Storyboarding I
In this lesson students will utilize the knowledge they gained about camera shots
from the previous lesson for use in storyboards. Students will also be aware of
the value of listing key elements of a scene on a storyboard such as music,
camera angles and voiceovers.
VCAL outcomes: Writing for practical purposes
Preparation:
- Find film scene on YouTube
- Print blank storyboard sheets
- Draw a 10 X 3 horizontal grid of 20cm X 20cm squares on the
whiteboard
Procedure:
1) Play opening scene of Paris, Texas to engage students and as an example
of varied cinematography. Ask students what shots they saw and what effect
they had.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0YMCWR8jzpU
2) Introduce the storyboard concept as a drawing of each camera shot that
appears in a scene of a movie.
Also explain that the storyboard is used by the film crew, including the director
and cinematographer, as a recipe or instruction book.
3) Circulate blank storyboard sheets. Play the film scene again, this time
pausing on every shot. With the film paused, select a volunteer to draw the
paused image in one of the squares on the whiteboard. The rest of the class are
instructed to draw the same image in their individual blank storyboard squares.
Repeat this process for 30-60 seconds of the film (depending on time
constraints).
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LESSON TEN Storyboarding II
Students storyboard their short film.
VCAL outcomes: writing for practical purposes, oracy for knowledge
Preparation:
- print copies of class short film script
- print copies of Film studies worksheet
- Draw a 10 X 3 horizontal grid of 20cm X 20cm squares on the
whiteboard
Materials:
- copies of class short film script
- Film studies worksheet
Procedure:
1) Review the previous lesson and discuss the different effects of different
camera shots. Explain that, in this lesson, students will be starting to storyboard
their own short film.
2) Select volunteers to be stand ins for the characters in the film script. For
each segment in the film script, the teacher asks the students:
- Whats the mood of this moment/scene?
- What will we be trying to show the audience in this moment/scene?
- What type of shot will best communicate what we are trying to show?
- Where will the camera be?
As each question is answered, the teacher moves around the stand-in actors in
the room as the imaginary camera, to help the students visualize where the best
camera positions will be.
This method of letting the students actually see their actors in the scenes helps a
great deal and avoids confusion if they were to simply visualize the scenes in their
mind
Select a volunteer to draw the chosen camera shots in the squares on the
whiteboard. Make sure the student labels the storyboard panels with the type of
shot (ie close up).
Repeat this process for each scene of the students short film. To storyboard the
whole film may take 2-3 lessons, depending on how motivated the students are.
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This process gets a bit repetitive in the final scenes, but students should be
reminded that this kind of attention to detail and planning in pre-production will
save a lot of time and make things a lot less stressful during the shooting of their
film.
3) Circulate copies of the Film studies worksheet. Give students time to
answer the questions on their own and then go over them as a class.
Once the students have completed the Film studies worksheet, its time to take a
deep breath and prepare for the second part of the unit series Production.
This pre-production unit could be modified to include actor auditions and
rehearsals, sound recording and lighting workshops, and also explanations of the
different roles that can be played on a film production crew.

Name: __________
Film studies worksheet
Camera work
What is the most difficult shot to shoot? Why?
What things does the camera operator need to think about?
What is the benefit of a tripod, when shooting video?

Sound
How important is sound in a film?
Why does the assistant director say quiet on set before filming begins?
Why is it important to listen to the sound through the headphones?

Film production
What was your favourite part of film pre-production (brainstorming, story
planning, character development, script writing, location hunting)? Why?
Props
Whats the most important thing to think about when choosing props?
How important are props in a movie?
What can a prop say about a character?
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Locations
Why is a location important?
What can a location tell us about a scene?
What do you have to consider when you choose a location? (safety, legal, noise..)

Themes
How is the principle safe and legal represented in our short film?
Why is it important to have clear themes when writing a film?
Why is the ending of a film important?

Reflection
What role have you enjoyed during the filming of our movie? Why?
What part of filmmaking would you like to know more about?
Compare reading a book to watching a movie - what is different?
Who would you like to watch our film?

Assessment Rubric
Student Name:
Unit/Task title and Year level
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Assessor comments
Assessment
Criterion 1

Use of a large range of relevant
materials and activities that
cater to different learning styles

student Lecturer
Criterion 2

Unit offers students
opportunities to drive the
development of the project

Criterion 3

Appropriate progression of
lessons and clear focus on final
project

Comments
Grade: ---- /20

References:
Edmund Rice Education Australia website
http://www.youthplus.edu.au/schools-services-details/youth-schools-
network/flexible-learning-centre-north-melbourne/north-melbourne-flexible-
learning-centre.html

APPENDICES
1.) Nursery Rhyme handout
Jack and Jill The Queen of Hearts
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Who are the main characters in the story?

What do they want?

Do they get it?

Why/why not?

Are they changed in the end?

Who are the main characters in the story?

What do they want?

Do they get it?

Why/why not? Is justice upheld? How?

Are they changed in the end?

2.) Disco Biscuits script

INT. LAUNDROMAT, DAY

A DISHEVELED MAN, late 40s, sleeps on a bench inside a LAUNDROMAT. He
snores loudly, cradling a balloon dog. A WOMAN loads clothes into a washing
machine nearby.

DISHEVELED MAN is awoken when the balloon dog bursts.

DISHEVELED MAN realises that he is not wearing a shirt.

DISHEVELED MAN
Youre not washing my shirt, are you love?

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The WOMAN ignores the question, shaking her head.

DISHEVELED MAN looks for his shirt under the bench, and in the bin, but all in
vain. He shrugs his shoulders and stands in the doorway of the LAUNDROMAT,
sniffing his armpits.
OFF SCREEN
Put on a shirt, dick slapper!

DISHEVELED MAN (to himself)
Dick slapper?

DISHEVELED MAN re-enters the laundromat, grabs an old t-shirt from the
ground, and walks out again.

EXT. QUIET STREET, DAY

DISHEVELED MAN struts down a sparsely populated street.

DISHEVELED MAN walks past a BUSKER, boogieing on the sidewalk next to his
stereo, which plays 70s disco tunes.

The BUSKER suddenly notices DISHEVELED MAN's T-shirt.

BUSKER
Yo, baldy! What's that shit, disco biscuits? You trippin'?!

The words "DISCO BISCUITS" appear above and below a picture of an Oreo-like
cookie on DISHEVELED MAN's shirt.

DISHEVELED MAN
It's your music, brother.
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BUSKER
Nah, man, your shirt, what's that mean?

DISHEVELED MAN looks down at his shirt, reads the slogan.

DISHEVELED MAN
Oh, this?

BUSKER
I like disco, that make me a biscuit?! Or maybe I'm a cracker! S'that what you're
sayin'?

DISHEVELED MAN raises his hands at BUSKER'S rant.

DISHEVELED MAN
Whoa...whoa...

DISHEVELED MAN points to his shirt, bemused.

BUSKER
It's all there, man! It's disrespectful--

DISHEVELED MAN
Alright...alright..if you'll excuse me I have...matters to attend to.

BUSKER
Better attend to gettin' yo ass outta my hood with that shirt on, ya disco-dissin'
disc wit!

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DISHEVELED MAN shakes his head and walks away.

EXT. SUBURBAN PARKING LOT, DAY
DISHEVELED MAN leans against a wall, sunning himself, when a SHADY MAN
pushing a shopping trolley approaches.

SHADY MAN
Psst. Hey man, you got any?

DISHEVELED MAN
Any what?

SHADY MAN
Disco Biscuits, man, let me get a couple.

DISHEVELED MAN
Oh, god, here we go...

SHADY MAN bristles.

SHADY MAN
What, so you got the shirt, but you don't got the biscuits?

DISHEVELED MAN
Why, they good?

SHADY MAN
Oh, God, are they good.

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SHADY MAN looks wistfully into the distance.

DISHEVELED MAN
Disco biscuits...disco biscuits... Oh, DISCO biscuits! Right-

SHADY MAN's eyes widen, hopefully.

SHADY MAN
...yeah, yeah, those magical bikkies that make your head spin...and your bull
run...and you're floating on a giant...pink corn flake of love...

DISHEVELED MAN
Yeah...yeah...you know I've had em! Lots of em. I fill my bathtub with
em...swimmin' in bikkies...

SHADY MAN thinks he is actually onto something.

SHADY MAN
So many bikkies...corn flake...

DISHEVELED MAN
Yep, but guess what?! I SOLD OUT!

SHADY MAN
Yeah...yeah...Wha...What? You sold-

DISHEVELED MAN
That's right. All gone!

SHADY MAN
34
Aw, you mongrel...you...you-

DISHEVELED MAN begins to cross the road, snickering.

SHADY MAN
False-advertising...sell-out... mongrel...son-of-a-bitch!

DISHEVELED MAN waves his hand over his head, dismissively.

DISHEVELED MAN (angrily, to himself)
What's wrong with these people?!

SHADY MAN (off-screen, pleading)
Hey man, don't be like that. Let me give you my number--

EXT. Graffiti-covered wall, DAY
A YOUTH scribbles graffiti on a telephone pole with a black marker.
DISHEVELED MAN walks up to the YOUTH.

DISHEVELED MAN
Gimme that!

The YOUTH shrugs and hands over the marker, warily.

DISHEVELED MAN takes off the t-shirt. He then draws a big cross over the
biscuit, and the words DISCO and BISCUITS. After pondering a moment, he
smiles, writes EAT MORE BEEF.

EXT. suburban Park bench, DAY

35
DISHEVELED MAN sits with his right shoe off, folding a piece of newspaper,
when an uptight COMPANY EXEC carrying a briefcase approaches him, stiffly.

COMPANY EXEC
Pardon me, sir, but I represent Dag-Wood Enterprises, makers of Disco Biscuits
and other top quality cookies--

DISHEVELED MAN
There it is again! What is it with these damn Disco Biscuits?!

COMPANY EXEC
Let's not mince around here. Your defacing of that shirt besmirches our brand.
And your choice of words is negligent, to say the least.

DISHEVELED MAN
What's wrong with more?!

COMPANY EXEC
Don't play the raw prawn with me, sir. The public outcry over our use of beef
extract was far-reaching-

DISHEVELED MAN
You put beef...in disco biscuits?

COMPANY EXEC
Beef extract, sir.

DISHEVELED MAN laughs.

DISHEVELED MAN
Oh, excuse me, just the extract, right, right-
36

COMPANY EXEC
Irregardless, that shirt now comes with a duty of wearer. You have
responsibilities-

DISHEVELED MAN throws his arms up in the air.

DISHEVELED MAN
Responsibilities?! I'm wearing the shirt! So if I want to...I'll wipe my ass with it-

COMPANY EXEC
Actually, not since the brand protection legislation was passed. As an appointed
executor of this legislation, I refer you to statute 47b section 12, the duty of
wearer clause, which states that all wearers of brands must do so courteously
and without mutilation. You must remove that shirt immediately.

DISHEVELED MAN
You're joking, right?!

COMPANY EXEC
Irregardless, sir-

DISHEVELED MAN
Irregardless ain't a word, man!

COMPANY EXEC
I strenuously ask you to reconsider, sir. The repercussions for perpetua-tors--

DISHEVELED MAN laughs, and looks from left to right.

DISHEVELED MAN
37
Perpa pa pa! You want the shirt?

DISHEVELED MAN stands and raises his shoe, menacingly.

DISHEVELED MAN
Come and get it!

COMPANY EXEC clenches his teeth, aware he is outmatched.

COMPANY EXEC
Very well, sir.

DISHEVELED MAN re-attends his shoe, and angrily watches COMPANY EXEC
depart.

EXT. SUBURBAN PARK, DAY

COMPANY EXEC talks into a concealed microphone.

COMPANY EXEC
The perpetua...tor was non- compliant. Yes, he was still harbouring the reverse-
marketing article. No, he did not contravene any other...oh, but he did brandish a
large shoe. I see, a code 4. And he's uh quite...bulbous...you think this calls for...I
understand.

EXT. BACK ALLEY INTERSECTION, DAY

DISHEVELED MAN walks down an alley toward the COMPANY EXEC, who is
hiding around the corner of the alley. The COMPANY EXEC steps out at the last
minute with his briefcase covering one hand, startling DISHEVELED MAN.

38
COMPANY EXEC
Yoo-hoo, Mr Disco-

DISHEVELED MAN
Dagwood! What are you--

COMPANY EXEC
I just wanted to say I'm sorry-

DISHEVELED MAN
Yeah...uh..well shit yeah...it's my shirt...I can do what I-

DISHEVELED MAN steps toward COMPANY EXEC threateningly.

COMPANY EXEC
...that you can't follow the rules!

The COMPANY EXEC suddenly drops his briefcase and lunges at DISHEVELED
MAN with a Tazer, zapping him. DISHEVELED MAN screams, but is rendered
powerless.

COMPANY EXEC (under his breath)
...responsibilities..duty of wearer...most inappropriate...gross
misconduct...misrepresentation...just doing my job...highly negligent...

The COMPANY EXEC cuts the front of the T-SHIRT from DISHEVELED MAN's
body with scissors and smirks as he places it in a plastic folder. DISHEVELED
MAN lies convulsing.

COMPANY EXEC
Dagwood Enterprises appreciates your cooperation.
39

DISHEVELED MAN
It was...just...a fucking t-shirt!

COMPANY EXEC departs.

EXT. Back alley intersection, late afternoon
DISHEVELED MAN awakens, groggily. He notices the gaping hole cut in the t-
shirt. Bemused, he tears at the t-shirt, twisting and groaning and freeing himself
of it once and for all. DISHEVELED MAN gives a sigh of satisfaction, as if he's
defeated some arch enemy.

PASSERBY (OFF SCREEN)
Hey mate, put on a shirt, will ya?

DISHEVELED MAN's eyes widen angrily. He attempts to stand.

DISHEVELED MAN
What did you say?!

DISHEVELED MAN threatens the PASSERBY as we FADE TO BLACK.

THE END

Justin Olmstead Middle Years Teaching Unit

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