Evidence 5 Smith 1

I. Introduction
During my student teaching at Cary High School I was responsible for teaching the
Romeo and Juliet unit. I was assigned this unit by my cooperating teacher as she wanted to
allow me enough time at the beginning of the semester to establish my presence in the classroom
and transition from the role of student to the role of instructor. Throughout my experience as a
full time teacher, my students were rarely behind their desks. They were always engaging in
activities that had them moving throughout the classroom. Romeo and Juliet is difficult to
comprehend if you do not have a visual representation, so my students were assigned roles and
asked to present to the class. It really helped to stimulate the analytical parts of their minds as
they observed the play happening and utilized that information to make inferences about what
would happen throughout the progression of the plot.
Having this information was vital to succeeding on the final project as students had to be
able to explain who was to blame for the deaths of Romeo and Juliet. They had to write an essay
in which they provided in-text citations and analyze how these particular excerpts support their
argument. This involved making sense of Shakespeares language and translating it into
terminology better understood in modern times. Successfully completing their final paper
required them to choose excerpts that were pertinent and not just random blurbs of text with no
connection to the content of their essay. Being able to explain who is to blame involves the use
of confidence and analytical skills in which the student had to assert his or her side and maintain
a strong voice of reason throughout the essay. As members of an honors English class, they
were held to high expectations. I recognized a wide variety of academic levels and abilities in
the classroom, but since they were enrolled in an honors level class, they were held to
expectations appropriate for advanced students. I desired an activity that would really challenge
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my students and provide them the opportunity to elaborate on their personal knowledge of the
play as well as show evidence that they understood the main concepts within the story. This was
their opportunity to illustrate their learning through an assessment other than on a test/quiz
II. Instructional Sequence
The final paper was not assigned until after the class had completed their Romeo and
Juliet seminar. For the entire 90-minute period, I took a step back and allowed my students to
take over and lead the classroom. They became the teachers in that the discussion was driven
only by their ideas and perceptions. I was there as a facilitator to pose questions and help steer
the discussion if things ever got off topic. Throughout this enlightening experience, students
made insightful observations about the connections between the play and issues that permeate
current societies. They touched on such concepts as how the relationship between Romeo and
Juliet was driven only by lust and debated what it means to truly love someone. I wished only
for everyone to contribute, as I wanted each of them to realize that my classroom is a safe zone
where all ideas are accepted and worthwhile. I had to prod a few of my students to participate,
but once they started talking, they realized how much they had to share about the play. What I
loved most about the seminar is the in-depth observations made by my students. They utilized
their higher levels of thinking to make insightful interpretations about the play and their
confidence soared. Although some students initially doubted their understanding of the play, I
watched as they amazed their classmates with some of their personal comments. When students
can speak with authority, they provide better clarification and elaboration. Peers can jump in
when they sense a classmate is struggling and/or when they wish to build off remarks.
The final question in the seminar was a round robin in which students were asked to
name the character they blamed for the deaths of Romeo and Juliet. After going around the
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circle, they had the opportunity to elaborate on their thought process and explain why they
blamed a particular individual. This allowed them to get their thoughts in order before
attempting the final project. Students were allowed to pinpoint their major reasons for blaming a
character, thereby composing an outline for their written assignment. They began writing their
essays via the discussion before they had any idea what was expected in the written essay and
this helped to cut back on their workload in that they would not be tackling the paper from
scratch. They already knew what they wanted to write and needed only to find support and
quotations within the play.
When the discussion started to slow down, I revealed the rubric for the final essay and
explained the assignment to them: Pick one character from the play and select two reasons for
why that character is to blame for the deaths of Romeo and Juliet. Once they had selected their
main reasons, they were to provide one quote to support each of their arguments. I walked them
through the process of introducing the quote and how to properly cite their evidence. I enforced
the importance of having context for the quote so to help readers better understand the
connection between the argument and the citation. Once the quote was introduced and
documented, I walked them through the process of analyzing and building their evidence. They
had to do more than re-word the quote in modern English; they had to explain what the quote
signifies and how it contributes to the progression of the plot. They had to explain how it
connects to the deaths of Romeo and Juliet and how it supports the character they blame for the
death of the star-crossed lovers. I provided students a step-by-step walkthrough of creating an
outline and utilizing the information garnered from reading and from the discussion to compose a
strong essay. Many of them had questions, but they revolved mostly around whether or not they
could address something other than characters (i.e. lust or greediness) that contributed to their
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deaths and requesting further elaboration on a thesis statement. Students were concerned with
the technical aspects of the paper and offered little to no hesitation about the content and
argument.
III. Analysis of Student Work
Students were allowed the opportunity to turn in multiple drafts of their essays. After all
had completing the first draft, we took a few moments in class to go over a checklist of how to
compose a well-articulated argumentative paper. The first section we addressed was the
introduction and students were notified to make sure they included the title, author, and genre for
Romeo and Juliet. If this were lacking they were asked to make a note of including that
information in the first sentence of the paper. We then moved on to the creation of the thesis
statement. Students were reminded that it should be the last sentence in the introduction and
should summarize their argument. Again, if this were lacking in their drafts, students were asked
to make note of how to properly compose their thesis statement and to place it in the correct
section of their introduction. Once we covered the basics of the introduction paragraph, we
moved into a discussion of what is to be found within each paragraph.
Students highlighted their quotes so they could easily be found and they decided whether
or not they included an efficient lead in for each citation. I asked students to mark whether or
not they discussed who is speaking and in what context. They were also asked to make note of
whether or not they included where in the play this quote took place. The most difficult part of
this process for students was determining whether or not their initial analyses were sufficient.
Quite a few confused summarizing and analyzing and did little beyond reviewing the play.
Many provided their quote and translated the speech into modern terminology without
commenting on how it connected to the character. Analyzing is a difficult skill to teach and
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explain and we spent a good chunk of time reviewing the process of utilizing higher levels of
thinking throughout writing this essay.
Developing the conclusion paragraph was also difficult in that I expected students to
offer a counter argument. They had to tie in the possibility of blaming another character and
touch on how they contributed to the deaths of Romeo and Juliet. Students were confused by
this concept and in the majority of their first drafts counter arguments were left out. I explained
that all I required was a simple sentence in which they transitioned into the counter argument,
such as, Though this character is the most to blame, one could also blame this character for
XXXX reason. I did not expect them to go in-depth and provide a detailed discussion for their
counter argument. I needed only basic proof that they thought about the ways in which different
characters brought about the tragedy at the end of the play. That eased their concerns and the
questions about this expectation quickly dwindled. Students were then asked to make note of
whether or not they reworded their thesis statement and briefly summarized the main points of
their papers. I told students if someone could read only the conclusion and genuinely understand
their argument and why they blamed a certain character, then the paragraph required little to no
tweaking.
Beyond the conclusion, we focused on the technical aspects of the paper, such as using
present tense verbs and avoiding the use of first person pronouns. I reminded them that this
paper is about their beliefs and interpretations supported by their reasons. Students individually
marked all their grammar and spelling errors, as these can be easy to miss when briefly reading
over the draft and tweaking certain parts. They were then allowed the remainder of class to work
through editing their papers on their own and could ask me questions about specific expectations
and/or whether or not they were going about the essay the correct way.
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A. Sarah Romeo and Juliet Paper
Sarah is an absolutely brilliant individual who achieved the highest grade in the class.
She produced a perfect example of the type of essay I was looking for and was able to witness
connections not visible to the rest of her classmates. She was quick to pick up on the concept of
in-text citations and, unlike her peers, selected only those segments that would strengthen her
argument. She held high expectations for her performance in the classroom and always
exceeded whatever goals set by others. She was driven by a passion for success, thereby
sometimes leaving me with little to no advice to offer about improving her essay. Even so I
made sure to comment on the perfection found throughout her paper. I notified Sarah of her
strong argument and how she selected some of the best quotations for her evidence. I made sure
to make Sarah feel confident about her essay so that she would never hesitate about whether or
not her paper was good enough.
When addressing the major concerns of her essay, she marked very few comments
throughout the paper. For example, I emphasized the importance of using present tense verbs as
opposed to past tense verbs as the story of Romeo and Juliet is to be thought of as currently
existing and ongoing. That was a realization she made on her own and she marked only a few
incorrect forms in her initial draft. She grasped the basic skills necessary for achieving a good
grade and needed only to work on the technical aspects of her paper. Her main area of concern
was failing to provide enough information about her quotes and to introduce them with little to
no context. She assumed the paraphrase would provide the fundamentals necessary for
understanding the importance of the quote and I was quick to redirect this error by enforcing the
importance of knowing who is speaking and what events elicited the speech. This produced
reminders all over her paper to better introduce her quotes and write the paper as if addressing
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someone who had little to no knowledge about the play. Whereas her initial thesis statement was
a basic proclamation of blaming Capulet, I walked her through the process of creating a more
efficient thesis statement. She had two grand ideas as to why Capulet was to blame and she
needed only to combine them into one main idea easily accessible by the reader. I reminded her
that the thesis statement had to be strong and summed up the main driving factors behind her
argument. For this paper, the thesis statement was to be the last sentence in the introduction and
should provide a transition into the following body paragraphs. With this basic walk-through,
she created a thesis statement that sufficiently introduced the main ideas of the paper and
provided the reader an outline of what to expect throughout the essay. Sarah was accepting
and appreciative of my help and did all she could to make sure her paper effectively met the
expectations I set for her.
B. Dylan Romeo and Juliet Paper
The biggest issue with Dylan is his incessant desire to be funny. Having been a
member of the improvisation group at Cary High School, he preferred to utilize a satirical tone
throughout his assignments. He was never all that confident about his ability to succeed in the
classroom and I think thats what drove the constant comedic tone throughout his essay. He
hoped to mask his lack of analytical skills by capitalizing on an ability that he mastered. Perhaps
if I were able to laugh and genuinely enjoy his paper, I could have overlooked its lack of honors
level material. But he was held to the expectations I set for all in this honors class. Dylan is a
brilliant individual but he failed to develop the skills necessary for applying himself. He was
more interested in having fun and failed to meet his full potential. Dylan hid behind his
comedy and was one of the lower-level students in my classroom. He was always respectful and
did whatever was asked of him, but he never gave 100%. Dylan did not realize what he was
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capable of accomplishing and I hoped some extra one-on-one attention would bring forth the
confidence necessary for succeeding in an honors level class.
As you can see in his initial draft, Dylan failed to make many corrections. Most of
what he accomplished was circling random words that had been misspelled. He did little to
focus on the organization of his paper and make sure he was meeting all the expectations I had
explicitly laid out only a few days before. Dylan believed that he had produced a sufficient
paper and he was not able to catch onto the errors in analysis. I marked up his final draft more
than he marked up his initial draft and I made sure to prod him with a lot of questions. I
questioned what he as thinking as he worked on his outline and whether or not he provided a
good balance of summarizing and analyzing his quotes. I recognized a lot of ability within
Dylan and, in retrospect, I wish that I had assigned him a lower grade. Im not sure he really
deserved an 88 when compared to the work that others submitted. He failed to mark basic
technical errors in his paper, such as making sure the title was italicized and he improperly
formatting the essay based on manuscript rules. Even after enforcing the importance of using
present tense verbs, his paper was still riddled with past tense verbs. Dylan chose not to
challenge himself and by making the conscious effort to avoid the help I offered, he produced a
paper that was subpar and way below his ability as a 9
th
grade honors English student.
IV. Reflection
Upon looking over the assignment, I do wish I had graded their edits and comments after
I took the time, in class, to make sure they had all the necessary information they needed to
succeed. Quite a few students failed to really take advantage of that opportunity and did little to
make sure their paper were up to par. They did not ask questions and there was little difference
between their drafts and their final copies. While I do not like the idea of threatening to grade
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something in order to elicit more attention to completing the assignment, I do want students to
take their assignments seriously because I believe that every student is capable of success.
Sometimes that includes teachers exhibiting a harsher side. Sometimes that means challenging
students in ways that evoke frustration and stress in that they are held to higher expectations to
which they are not accustomed. This includes having a lot more one-on-one attention for those
students who are struggling. I wish I had the extra time to respond to all the initial drafts, and
perhaps base part of the final grade on acting on the suggestions made by the teacher and ones
classmates. They were not able work with their peers throughout the editing process and having
a second pair of eyes often helps to pick out more errors than initially seen. Walking them
through a checklist can only accomplish so much if they do not take the time to focus on the
expectations I set forth in the discussion. I now see the need to spend more time after
school/during lunch with those students heading toward a failing grade so I can decipher their
personal insecurities with the assignment and make sure that they fully understood what is
expected of them.