Heart

Healing with
I N S P I R A T I O N S F O R H E A LT H C A R E P R O F E S S I O N A L S

M A RT I N H E L L D O R F E R, D. M I N . A N D T E R R I M OSS

M O S S C O M M U N I C AT I O N S
Copyright© 2007 by Terri Moss
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed,
or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording
or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of
the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and
certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. For permission
DEDICATED TO THOSE WHO…
requests, write to the publisher at the address below.
… are the hidden saints, who inspire us.
Moss Communications …risk all, in order to excel in patient care.
P.O. Box 344 …find protected time for reflection in the midst of busy days.
Orinda, CA 94563 …are, above all, a healing presence to patients and caregivers alike.
Tel: (925)377-5288
Fax: (925)377-5244
mosscomm@mindspring.com
THANK YOU
ORDERING INFORMATION

Special discounts are available for bulk purchases. Please contact Moss
Communications for more information.

Moss Communications books are printed using paper that has been manufactured by
environmentally responsible processes, when available. This may include using trees
grown in sustainable forests and incorporating recycled paper. This book has been
printed using soy-based ink.

Designed by Nicole Watson, Pensé Design, 875 4th St. San Rafael, CA www.pensedesign.com
Printed in the U.S.A. by Hartford Media, Berkeley, CA. www.hartfordmedia.com.

Library of Congress Cataloguing-in-Publication Data

Helldorfer, Martin
Moss, Terri
Healing with Heart, Inspirations for Health Care Professionals/by Martin Helldorfer and
Terri Moss
p. cm.
ISBN 13: 978-0-615-14388-0

#d 2 D3 #d 3 D3
 “This is a remarkable book, one that everyone working in health care
should make a part of their day because it will inspire and enrich their
work experience. The wise and insightful reflections will remind them
of why they went into this field in the first place and chose to expose
themselves to its challenges. Marty’s rich wisdom and firsthand
knowledge of in-the-trenches health care will grab readers and
inspire them to live up to their highest potential. This is a win-win
proposition for everyone: employees, administrators and patients.
I believe it deserves a place on everyone’s desk as a gentle reminder
that our strength, courage and individual talents really do matter.”
Dean Edell, M.D.
Nationally-syndicated television and radio talk show host
Best Selling Author
h “I have read Marty’s reflections [Thought from Mission, the basis for
“Healing with Heart is a must-read for all health care employees. It provides
encouragement and inspirational support for novice nurses as well as
experts who have been in the field for years. This captivating handbook
reminds us of the sacredness of our profession and the intricate beauty
and necessity of working together as a team. This book will resonate
throughout any health care organization; for those providing direct
patient care as well as those supporting them. Senior executives, accoun-
tants, surgeons, nurses, admitting clerks, janitors and volunteers will
all see the value of their unique contributions to our common goal of
providing safe, quality care to our patients and their families.”
Anne M. Hirsch, D.N.S., A.R.N.P.
Interim Dean & Professor
Washington State University Intercollegiate College of Nursing
#d 4 D3
“The weekly Thought From Mission [the emails that are the basis for
Healing with Heart] is the most unique form of communication that
I have ever seen during almost thirty years of working in hospitals.
The meaning of mission or how the spirit of one’s mission connects
with the organization as a whole, is often lacking or misunderstood.
Marty Helldorfer has perfected an enlightening way to make this
connection real, thus truly bringing mission to life, and for that
he is to be congratulated.”
Les Hirsch
President and Chief Executive Officer
Touro Infirmary, New Orleans, LA
h
Healing with Heart] weekly for the past five years and have been amazed by
his creativity. . . and his ability to address issues that are pertinent to
the average employee and other weeks to physicians and clinicians.
He consistently highlights the dignity of the person and how all of
us, no matter our socio-economic or educational level, must wrestle
with life, death, illness, surprise traumatic events and basic respect for
one another. I often forwarded his reflections to our palliative care
and hospice clinicians who appreciated his ability to connect ultimate
life issues with basic day-to-day living. They often commented on
how helpful it was to be reminded of the importance
of caring for one another. I welcome this book, as will others.
This is the kind of book I would like to receive as a gift!”
John Perring-Mulligan, Ph.D.
SVP Mission Services
Affinity Health System, Menasha, WI
#d 5 D3
“We are often guilty of looking but not really seeing. Through stories
drawn from everyday life, work and relationships, Martin gives us
reason to take notice. His gentle yet provocative affirmations call
those who strive to heal others to see themselves and those around
them with renewed clarity, insight, and appreciation. This compilation
of his messages is truly a gift to those who give so much.”
Dorothy Horrell, Ph.D.
Executive Director
Bonfils-Stanton Foundation
h that lovingly and passionately heals people who are suffering.”
“Martin Helldorfer and Terri Moss remind us that health care is more
than a single, highly educated, well trained individual working hard
to alleviate suffering. No, they tell us, health care—in any setting—
is a community enterprise, one, which extends from the boiler room to
the surgical suite. Helldorfer and Moss challenge us to understand
the “care” in health care as interest, concern, and solicitude extended
to patient, colleague and co-worker.
By helping us to awaken to the vulnerability of self—a self often
stretched too far—Helldorfer and Moss show us how to take stock of
our own needs and draw upon the energy of the health care community,
a community of dedicated healers. Helldorfer and Moss show us the
small ways in which we can connect with others and grow big as indi-
viduals, individuals who are part of a larger community; a community,
which, through a variety of activities, is dedicated to the cure of the
patient. Helldorfer and Moss guide us toward the daily practice of
small activities which lift others up in an attitude of reverence and
respect, and transform “cure” into a corporate, professional activity
Thomas J. Tyrrell, Ph.D.
Pastoral Counseling Center of Santa Fe, New Mexico

Through a series of thoughtful reflections and daily exercises, we are

challenged to deepen our professional lives by envisioning our work as
more than the organizing, managing, and efficient control of a health
care delivery system. We are challenged to deepen the person we bring
to our profession. We are invited to awaken our passion for our work by
imagining our skill as a gift; a gift we put at the disposal of others.
We are invited to imagine cure of a sick body as the healing—
the making whole—of body, mind, and spirit.

#d 6 D3 #d 7 D3
About This Book
Healing with Heart is based on weekly inspirational emails, Thoughts from
Mission, that Dr. Helldorfer has been writing for the past six years to the
employees, physicians and volunteers of Exempla Healthcare, a multi-
hospital system in the Denver, Colorado area. His training in psycholo-
gy, experience as a health care executive, and his life as a de la Salle monk
infuse his writings with a gentle, judgment-free, and relentlessly opti-
mistic perspective. As he walks the halls of the hospitals, medical centers
and offices, talks to people and observes the unfolding of everyday life, he
has recorded his reflections, Thoughts from Mission, and now Healing with Heart.
When you see “I” mentioned in this book, it is referring to Marty and to
his experiences within the hospitals.
Pick Up This Book When….
• You need an upbeat dose of inner reality.
• You want to begin your day remembering that life is bigger than the
pressures around you.
• You want to start your day over with a realigned perspective.
• You have that inner ache that says that you want more out of your
work life.
• You need an encouraging nudge to stretch and try something new.
• You feel alone and want to reconnect with your humanity and the
humanity of others.
• You need a friend to tell you that what you do counts and that you
are in the right place to do great things.
We hope this book becomes a reliable friend that you can turn to for encour-
agement, and as a reminder of the invaluable role you play in so many lives.
#d 8 D3
Table of Contents
Forward by Jeffrey Selberg, CEO, Exempla Healthcare
I N T RO D U C T I O N ......................................................................17
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS ................................................................18
I N S P I RAT I O N S PAG E
Healing Presence..................................................................21
Taking a “Protected Time” to Reflect ........................................23
Doing What We Love ............................................................25
Committing to Excellence ......................................................27
Practicing Thanks-Giving on Thanksgiving Day ..........................29
Influence..........................................................................31
The Power of Touch............................................................33
Humility............................................................................35
Being the Mayor of Your Own Corner of the World......................37
Considering the Patient’s Point of View ..................................39
Spirituality and Work ..........................................................40
Being Strong and Vulnerable ..................................................41
Overcoming Negativity ..........................................................43
Healing with Intention..........................................................45
Being More Than Our Professional Identity..............................46
Avoiding Burnout................................................................48
Going Beyond the Obvious ....................................................5o
Love in Action ....................................................................52
Respecting Others’ Inner Stories ............................................54
Work as a Sacred Act: Creating Places of Healing..........................55
Taking Personal Responsibility ................................................56
Valuing Everyone’s Job ..........................................................58
Rising Above Our Pain..........................................................59
Living an Examined Life ........................................................61
#d 9 D3
Taking Personal Responsibility for Patient Safety..........................63
Remembering that We Belong to One Another............................64
Continuous Learning ..........................................................65
Being Honest......................................................................66
Attitude Adjustment at Work ..................................................68
The Quiet Reality Underneath the Busyness ................................71
Slowing Down and Feeling Connected ......................................72
Expressing Gratitude Without Words ........................................73
Embracing a Fresh Perspective ................................................74
Leading with Courage and Faith ..............................................76
Recognizing the Invisible Heroes..............................................77
Making a Mark ....................................................................79
Stop and Breathe to Gain Perspective ........................................81
Gratitude Is a Gift................................................................83
Using Depression as a Motivation ............................................84
Making Your Job Influential and Meaningful ..............................86
Being a Force for Healing When There Is No Cure ......................87
Keeping Perspective About Why We’re Here................................89
Having an “Attitude” About Patient Safety ..................................91
Work and Intimacy ..............................................................93
The Impact of One ..............................................................95
Honoring the Call to be the Best ............................................97
Work Differently, Not More..................................................98
The Power of Connecting with Colleagues ................................101
Working with an Attitude of Gratitude ....................................102
Embracing Feedback ..........................................................104
Earning Trust....................................................................106
Courage to Speak ..............................................................109
Awakening to Our Lives ........................................................111
Remembering to Pause........................................................112
Controlling the Future........................................................113
Making a Resolution to Believe in Change................................115
#d 10 D3
Giving the Gift of Life..........................................................117
How We Work, Not What We Do ............................................118
Through the Eyes of a Child ..................................................119
Transforming Failure ..........................................................122
Fighting Prejudice Through Self-Reflection ..............................123
Keeping Life From Getting in the Way....................................125
Managing Fear..................................................................127
Creating Ceremonies ..........................................................128
Slowing Down and Thinking About All We Have ........................130
Standing in a Moment of Opportunity ....................................132
Applying New Ideas to Our Work............................................133
Grief as Teacher ................................................................134
Needing to Connect ............................................................135
Having Good Humor ..........................................................136
Embracing Diversity During the Holidays ................................138
Losing Perspective from Overwork ........................................140
Taking Pride in Your Work ....................................................141
The Impact of Working with Soul ..........................................144
Having a Lasting Impact ......................................................146
Expressing Our Inner Lives ..................................................148
Taking a Fresh Look at Our Life and Our Work........................150
ID Tags and “Uniforms” As Symbols of our Professional Ideals........152
Slowing Down and Feeling Grateful ........................................154
Teamwork and the Restless Attitude to Excel ..............................155
Changing the Mood with Our Words ......................................157
Valuing Volunteerism ..........................................................159
Carrying Our Inner Lives to Work ..........................................160
By Caring for One Another, We Create a Culture of Care ............162
Avoidance ........................................................................164
Attitudes About Money Shape How We Treat Others....................166
Memorial Day: Learning from Those Who’ve Gone Before Us ......169
The Stillness of Being a Healing Presence ................................170
#d 11 D3
Purposeful Reflection: Do You Truly Value Time? ......................172
Bringing Anticipation, Re-Dedication and Celebration to Our Work ..173
Learning from Failure..........................................................174
Being Sensitive to the Hidden Lives of Others............................175
When Flowers and Praise Aren’t Enough ..................................176
Expressing Our Uniqueness ..................................................177
Taking the Time to Be Attentive ............................................179
Creating a Positive Work Climate ............................................181
The Need for Diversity ........................................................183
Bringing Mind, Body and Spirit to Our Work............................185
Using Tragedy and Illness to be Mindful of Life and Work ............187
Valuing Vacation ................................................................189
Our Work Matters: It’s All in Your Perspective ..........................191
Truly Listening ..................................................................193
Expressing Empathy ............................................................194
Making Eye Contact ............................................................196
Holding to Our Caring Convictions During Tight Financial Times ....197
The Saints Among Us ..........................................................199
Bringing Our Whole Self to the Work Place ..............................201
It Takes a Team to Reduce Medical Errors ................................203
Two Holidays ....................................................................205
Practicing the Art and Science of Medicine ..............................206
Community ......................................................................207
Being Open to New Ideas ....................................................208
Reflect on the Immense Value of Our Work ..............................210
Honoring Our Diversity......................................................211
Becoming Quiet and Listening to Our Heart ............................212
Being on a Mission ............................................................213
Overcoming Cynicism and Betrayal ........................................214
Choosing an Attitude of Abundance........................................216
Being a Human Being, Not Just a Human Doing ........................218
Making the Ordinary, Extra-Ordinary ....................................220
#d 12 D3
Having a Shared Vision........................................................222
The Life and Death Value of Teamwork ..................................223
Respecting Inner Struggles ..................................................226
What Can the Great Religious Traditions Teach Us About Health Care? 227
Seeing Beyond Stereotypes ..................................................230
How Feverish Activity Keeps Us from Practicing the Art of Caring ..231
Making It Personal ............................................................233
Learning from Astronauts ....................................................234
Making the Tough Decision to Leave......................................236
Infusing Our Work with Gratitude..........................................239
Giving the Gift of Ourselves................................................240
Bringing Artistic Passion to Our Work ....................................242
Facing the Questions that Death Brings ..................................244
Believing Is Seeing ............................................................246
Acting With Gratitude........................................................247
Living the Life We’ve Been Given..........................................248
Finding Meaning in Volunteerism ..........................................250
Reflecting on Life and How We “Show Up” for Work..................252
Updating Our Labels ..........................................................254
Reflecting on Our Lives in and Outside of Work ........................256
Using Performance Assessments to Improve Ourselves ................257
The Sacredness in the Ordinary ............................................259
Respect: Taking a Fresh Look ................................................260
Being Open to the Unseen....................................................261
Integrity in Action..............................................................263
Remembering the Trust that Others Give Us............................264
Honoring Mentors, Being a Mentor ......................................266
Seeing the Saints Among Us..................................................267
It’s Easy to Make a Difference................................................269
Resisting New People, New Ideas ............................................271
Honoring What’s Important and Being Present..........................272
Valuing Creativity and Play ..................................................273
#d 13 D3
Improving Care One Person at a Time ....................................275
Forward
Waking Up!....................................................................277
Being Open to New Ideas....................................................278
Within health care, the mission of fostering healing and health to the
A Day of Profound Care ......................................................279
people and communities we serve, is often lost in our effort to bring the
Going Beyond Your Job Description ......................................280
best of medical technology to our patients, create the best working envi-
Making Decisions ..............................................................282
ronment for our hospital and medical staff, and at the same time, man-
Being Connected..............................................................283
age the vital signs of our hospitals. As a result, it becomes easy to believe
Honoring Unique Gifts......................................................285
that budgets, systems, and managerial controls should be the central
The Tradition of the Holidays in the Hospital..........................286
theme of our leadership. This is especially true at a time when we are
Being Present ....................................................................287
challenged by higher costs, lower reimbursement, and a health care mar-
Honoring Those Who Came Before Us....................................289
ket that, on the surface does not seem to value the spiritual side of heal-
Valuing Partnership, Celebrating Competition ..........................290
ing and health. Consequently, we can lose our way as leaders, believing
Being More than What We Do ..............................................292
that the business we are in is more important than the sacred work we do.
Honoring the Beauty and Sacredness of Our Surroundings ..........293
The Spiritual Side of Health Care ..........................................294
I have known Martin Helldorfer for six years. When we met, he was hired
Awakening to the Sacredness of Life—and Our Work ..................296
as our mission leader. In this short time, Martin has changed my sense of
I N D E X BY TO P I C ..................................................................297
what is important in terms of leadership, both with his presence and with
A B O U T T H E AU T H O R S ............................................................303
his weekly Thoughts from Mission.

His weekly commentary reminds us that we are human beings, not human
doings: that being fully present with our patients and with each other is
the most important step in bringing a healing presence to those we serve.
Martin also reminds us that we are never alone in what concerns us; that
indeed we are a community of people who share the same anxieties and
sense of scarcity, and a common desire to serve those in need. With this
realization, we find strength in each other and in the desire to overcome
the barriers that are before us.

#d 14 D3 #d 15 D3
Healing with Heart is a compilation of thoughts, beliefs, reflections and
stories that help us bring a sense of compassion, wonder, and love into
the workplace. They are a source of inspiration as we address the
challenges of the day. They also help us to be fully present to those who
entrust us with their care.
Martin and his writings have been a true gift to me and to the Exempla
family. I expect that they will be the same for you.
Jeffrey Selberg
President and CEO
Exempla Healthcare
h
We are changed by tragedy and death. While these events
awaken feelings of helplessness, we know that we are not. We
must be mindful of the goodness of life and of each human
being by making sure that our personal thoughts, dreams,
energies and actions always nurture the humanity we share.
Worldwide violence has raised our fears, but it has also
reawakened our appreciation of life and of one another. Now
is the time to reflect, if only for a few moments, on what we
are doing and how we are doing it. When we do, it is easier to
return to work with perspective, renewed energy, and commit-
ment. Every patient and each colleague deserves this of us.
Take a moment to reflect that our lives rest on the lives of
others. Slow down enough to recognize your responsibility to
help create and better our God-given world.
#d 16 D3
Introduction
Each week, for the past six years, I have written a Thought From Mission to the
employees and physicians of Exempla Healthcare. Every reflection has
been tied to a real-life event in the lives of these
remarkable professionals. Each was written for the purpose of helping the
busy professional recognize the value of their work. These are not
motivational snippets or how-to essays. Rather, they are simply the
unwrapping of everyday experiences to reflect on their beauty, meaning
and value. Please welcome them as you would a guest into your home.
Almost every patient who enters a hospital, medical office, or
treatment center, has lost something. What they have lost, or fear they
may have lost, is their health. That is an incredibly unsettling event that
places patients in a particularly uncomfortable and vulnerable position.
They know, in a way that many do not, that life is precious.
When working within health care, it is a challenge to remember that
a hospital or medical office is a space where love is expressed in a
particularly unique way. Our work, within the world of technology, is to
create a healing environment for those entrusted to our care. That is an
extraordinary responsibility.
The people working within health care tend to be busy and eminently
practical people. We do not have a lot of time for theorizing. Finding
moments to reflect on how-we-do what-we-do is difficult enough;
having time to read is even more of a challenge. We hope that these short
essays will help all of us recognize the value of what we are about. It is work
that is often viewed as a job, frequently seen as ordinary. It is best seen,
however, as a calling, with the sacred thinly veiled from view.
Martin C. Helldorfer
#d 17 D3
Acknowledgments
M A RT I N H E L L D O R F E R
Often, I have been asked “where do you get those thoughts, week after
week?” There is only one place of which I am aware. They come from the
women and men with whom I work.
Have you ever been to the theater or to a ball game and noticed fans
clamoring to meet with the rich and famous? Who is not a little boastful
after having shaken hands or of having a photo taken with a celebrity?
For the past six years, I have rubbed shoulders with extraordinary
individuals of inestimable value. They have worked in the cellars of the
medical centers, at the bedside of patients, in hidden cubicles of win-
dowless office buildings, in EDs and ORs, and innumerable physician
offices. I have no need to look for greatness. I have found it among my
colleagues. You are the ones to be acknowledged.
If you find these words helpful, they are yours. If they are not helpful,
I ask for your pardon for I have been unable to express the goodness I
have found in you.
On an entirely different note, this book would never have seen
the light of day without the inspiration, passion, dedication, stick-to-
itiveness, and downright doggedness of Terri Moss. She is gifted and
delightful. No author could have a better friend.
T E R R I M OSS
Healing with Heart has been a great journey for me. It started with a bad case
of work burnout and a flame of passion that was re-ignited when
I was introduced to Marty Helldorfer’s writings. The flame has been
burning ever since, guiding me, propelling me to publish this book.
#d 18 D3
I have had many supporters and angels along the way. Thanks to
Amanita Rosenbush, a talented editor who took this material and added
depth, polish and texture with a degree of dedication and thoughtfulness
that was inspiring. Our sessions were filled with debates about spirituali-
ty and many trips to the synonym finder.
Many thanks to my women friends for their never-ending belief in
me, and for holding up the signs that pointed the way; to Susan and
Aaron for a last-minute read and invaluable second opinion; and to my
friends in health care, whose opinions and encouragement kept me
going. Thank you also to my creative and loyal production team of Nicole
Watson, Pensé Design, for your beautiful work, and to Chet Shaw at
Hartford Media, for your optimism and willingness to find a way to make
this book happen.
Healing with Heart would not have been possible without my dear cousin
Evonne, who juiced the spark by introducing me to Marty, and who has
held my hand the whole way. Your creativity and love are awe-
inspiring. And, I am deeply grateful for my husband, Jack, who has
steadfastly supported me and trusted my vision. Your love is my rock.
And finally, to my wise and generous co-author, Marty, whose words
inspired me from the moment I read them. They pulled me out of a
malaise of cynicism and despair, and suggested that reflection, love, and
sacredness have a valid place at work. Thank you for trusting me to shape
your thoughts into Healing with Heart, so they can expand their reach and lift
others to new levels of healing. You are a blessing in my life, and in the
lives of countless others.
#d 19 D3
 Healing Presence
All of us are in need of healing, whether we are in a hospital or not. On
an emotional level, past conflicts and lost dreams lodge in our memory
and subtly find their way into our lives. Kind words, an understanding
glance, a favor offered, and honest conversations go a long way to healing
the wounds we carry.

Bringing a healing presence to one another doesn’t require special

training or expertise. On the contrary, we are a healing presence to one
another in ordinary ways that are easy to overlook.

• When a nurse notices and lingers with a patient who is fearful, he is

a healing presence.
• When a technically proficient physician remembers that she is a
physician-healer, as well as a physician-scientist, the door to healing
is opened.
• When an office assistant offers to cover for a colleague in need, even
before being asked, there is healing.
• When a patient representative listens attentively and turns to help a
complaining family member, families are healed.
• When a supervisor genuinely makes time to acknowledge, support,
and lead their colleagues, there is healing in the relationships.

If we fail as a healing presence, it is simply because we have forgotten that

all of us are in need of healing and that there is none without recogniz-
ing how important we are to one another.

#d 20 D3 #d 21 D3

A CEO explained being a “healing presence” to his board in this way:
“Creating a healing presence is a way of extending ourselves compassionately to those we serve.
Our patients, our staff, and our community are in need of it. Within health care it has been
buried too deep for too long. Each of us, regardless of title, position, or role, has the opportu-
nity to be a healing presence. It involves placing our patients’ needs first, not our own. This is
what will bring the magic back into health care.”
I will look for ways to listen and support the people I come in contact with today.
I will remember to be a conscious, healing presence in all that I do.
#d 22 D3
Taking a “Protected Time” to Reflect
A speaker from one of the nation’s most prestigious medical centers
once casually remarked that a significant barrier standing in the way of
offering the highest quality of patient care is not being able to “protect
time for reflection.”
What does this mean? It means we must acknowledge the need to separate
from our every day world for private time that is dedicated to uninter-
rupted, focused thought—and creating that opportunity for ourselves
regularly. When we work in a frenzied manner, it hinders the quality
of care. Taking time for reflection is fragile and needs to be protected.
How would our work place be different if we allowed time for reflection?
Patient floors and our offices would be increasingly more relaxed places
to work. There would be time during meetings to reflect on what we were
doing, where we were going, and how we were going to get there. We
would be encouraged to stand back and think creatively about how to get
the work done in our patients’ best interests. We would likely share more
of our thoughts and experiences with our colleagues.
With protected time for reflection, we would work more calmly, increase
our awareness and trust our feelings.
Is it possible to set up this culture in hospitals, treatment centers and
offices? Many would say, “Are you kidding me? There is already too much
to do and too many demands on us.” This belief is persuasive, yet self-
defeating. It keeps us from creating a balanced life. By believing this, we
lose perspective; every task becomes one more thing to do in an already
hectic day. Discouragement follows.
#d 23 D3

We can control and influence the way we work and shape the work place
by making small but significant changes. Here are a few suggestions:
• Arrive for work fifteen minutes early.
• Sit down with a cup of coffee and think about how to go about what
needs to be done.
• Say to yourself: There are four things I must finish today. I know
that I will only be able to do three of them (not an unfamiliar
situation for many clinicians). These are the three I choose to do.
• Take a break now and again during the course of a workday. If we
do not take it, we have a hint that we have fallen into the trap of
thinking that we are helpless and that others are controlling our lives.
Something curious happens when we take protected time—our pace
slows. Curiously, we make better decisions, are more effective, and less
overwhelmed. The challenge is to take responsibility for our lives,
something easier said than done.
Today, I will slow down and reflect on my work and the opportunities that await me.
I will protect the time I need to reflect so that I may bring a new thoughtfulness to
my work. I will encourage others to do the same.
#d 24 D3
Doing What We Love
Ted, the executive who works in the office next to mine, arrives well
before 7 a.m., sometimes earlier, and the first thing he does is to make
coffee for all of us. I’m no slacker when it comes to working long hours,
but he’s still in the office when I leave. Picture someone who is pleasant,
good-natured and competent, who has a quietly infectious personality,
and you will begin to describe Ted. I wish everyone had the opportunity
to work beside this man.
Why do some people come early and stay late? Why do certain employees
have such a pleasant attitude toward their coworkers, while others are testy
or demanding? Why are some easy with what the day brings, while others
are bothered by the slightest task and irritated with any question that is
asked of them? The difference lies in whether the person is just clocking
in hours to pick up a paycheck or whether he is what researchers call a
“vocation-loving” individual.
While they represent a small percentage of the workforce, vocation-
loving people probably make up more of the workforce than we imagine.
They are relaxed in the busyness of the day’s activities, they can keep their
perspective when everyone around is losing theirs, they enjoy their
vacations yet don’t curse the day they return to work. Whenever they talk
about their work, they make it sound fun, interesting and meaningful.
Yet as devoted as these people are to their job, they are not driven as if
their whole identity were wrapped up in it. They are balanced enough that
they still see themselves as fathers, mothers, friends and citizens, too.
You might say, “Easy for him, he’s not on the floor all day with sick
#d 25 D3

patients. He has a no-pressure job!” You would be wrong. While it’s true
that Ted doesn’t work directly with patients, you can find people like him
working in any position. They could be social workers, plumbers, physi-
cians, chefs, or nurses. Their attitude has nothing to do with the job
itself. What they possess that’s unique is an inner love and a sense of
mission for the work itself. Vocation-loving individuals are the people
who want to do what they have to do. Many of us are what researchers call
“ordinary.” That is, when we go to work, we feel that we’re there to do
what we have to do. When we can do what we want, we call it leisure time.
Vocation-loving individuals don’t make that separation.
When a job becomes a vocation, time moves easily from work to play. Who
are these people in your place of work and how is your own humanity
touched by them?
Today, I will look around and notice my vocation-loving colleagues. I will thank them
for the positive influence they have on my work and I will strive to turn my work into
my passion. If I am a vocation-loving person, I will continue to be grateful for the
gift I’ve been given—to love the work I do.
#d 26 D3
Committing to Excellence
Sunday is the Super Bowl. Those who love the game will be glued to the
TV. Everyone else must wonder what the attraction is to kicking a ball
down a field. The appeal is not just the sport, but also the drama. It is an
opportunity to be recognized as the best, and that is measured by winning.
Hospitals, believe it or not, share some similarities with football.
Obviously, our work isn’t about blocking and tackling to a goal line. Yet,
there are some common features. All of us have the inner desire to excel.
We want to defeat heart disease, avoidable cancers and diabetes. We want
to reduce infant mortality and birth defects. We are combating sky-
rocketing medical costs, careless use of resources and poor communica-
tions among teams and departments. And, we are competing against
ourselves to reduce medical errors, save lives, improve safety, and make
our facilities more efficient, clean, and healthy places to work and serve
those entrusted to our care.
World-class athletes build their lives around a dream. It is not unusual to
hear them say that they go to the gym before work and return soon after
work. They watch what they eat and limit any activities that distract them
from their training. Their bodies change accordingly. Swimmers develop
incredible upper body strength. Shot putters seem Herculean. Sprinters
are lean and muscular. They are all thoroughly focused.
We are not world-class athletes, yet we do have a desire to become the best
at what we do. We have the same commitment to excellence.
Some will say this analogy is a stretch. Football is about aggressive
competition, inflated egos, and money. Hospitals are about care, science,
#d 27 D3

and healing…and yes, money. Yet beneath both is the same human desire
to excel. Both efforts take commitment to a worthy goal. Both require
courage, fortitude, a full heart and a clear mind. We are talking about an
inward drive, a hunger to make a difference. Imagine what we could
accomplish if we brought the energy needed to win a championship to the
care of patients.
What does commitment look like in a medical facility? It is the radiolo-
gist who is extraordinarily careful, who takes a second and third look
at a film and notices something that no one else has seen. It is the lab
technician who carefully checks her work or the food service worker who
suggests an array of low-fat dishes in the cafeteria. It is the nurse who
consistently and conscientiously makes the effort to ensure clear lines of
communications among all team members involved in her patient’s care.
It is the resident who brings fresh eyes to a diagnosis, the plumber who
works overtime to find a corroded pipe before it bursts, the PBX
operator who makes a special effort to be pleasant even when the caller is
not, and the IT technician who keeps her knowledge, skills, and our
equipment updated so she can help us when there is a problem. It is the
medical team who directs patients to make healthier lifestyle choices, and
the department managers who find more efficient ways to run their
departments while supporting the goal of patient safety. There are as
many ways to excel as there are employees. Everyone contributes to the
task of becoming the best.
Am I committed to excel in my work? As an individual contributor and in my role
as a team player, I will use my inner drive to excel to help my organization meet
its goal.
#d 28 D3
Practicing Thanks-GivingThanksgiving
on
Day
Thursday is Thanksgiving Day. Most of us are aware of our blessings, be
they within our families, country or the work place. Within our differing
traditions, we express our appreciation in prayerful ways.
This is also the time of year to turn to one another as physicians and
employees to express our gratitude. Many of us in direct clinical care and
administration often hear words of appreciation, but those who work in
supportive roles often do not. We need to change that and go out of our
way to thank those who are overlooked. We know who they are.
Here are some suggestions. Express a kind word to those who:
• Carry hammers, pull cable, and open clogged drains.
• Remove scuff marks and polish the floors during night hours.
• Work in labs and draw blood for hours on end.
• Care for Alzheimer patients.
• Stand at the same table in the kitchen day after day, never seeing
a patient, yet expertly slicing box-loads of vegetables.
• Counsel the psychiatric and addicted patients.
• Spend days in cubicles focusing on codes and bills.
• Process our pay and cut checks for vendors.
• Volunteer their time and talent giving directions in the lobby.
• Track quality measures in never-seen offices.
• Work as office assistants in hospitals, treatment centers, or in
off-campus business offices.
• Upgrade our computers.
• Clean lavatories.
#d 29 D3

• Staff our physician office practices (even though we only know them
by their voices).
• Sweep the grounds and plow the snow.
• Connect thousands of patients by phone to their families.
• Operate the coffee carts.
• Serve as ambulance crews.
• Purchase supplies.
These are the people who make a hospital thrive. Without the contribu-
tion of every single person, the hospital would fail to function well. They
give us the chance every single day to bring out the best in ourselves.
There is one more group for whom we need to be grateful: patients. If you
have contact with patients, try to find ways to express, sensitively and
appropriately, your appreciation to those who have entrusted you with
their lives. Perhaps a word, glance, touch or kindness is all that is needed.
Today, I will express my appreciation to the people in my life.
#d 30 D3
Influence
Whenever we elect a new president, or when a new pope is chosen, or
when a company changes CEOs, the people who are looking to this
person for guidance have the opportunity to think about their expecta-
tions. We read about the new person in the paper and wonder what
qualities he or she will bring to the post.
It is interesting to consider that all of us are leaders, whether we know it
or not, whether we have the title to prove it or not. Everyone in a hospi-
tal setting is a leader, not just the physicians and the head administrators.
Think about it this way: everybody influences everyone else. Our attitudes
and the way we relate to others, shape the work place and impact the
feelings and behavior of those around us.
It can be a real stretch to believe that this principle applies to everyone.
It is tempting, for instance, to think that the guys who repair faucets or
scrub marks off the walls, are merely followers. Yet we can feel their
presence throughout the work space as much as the shift supervisor’s,
charge nurse’s or department head’s. We may not always be specifically
aware of it, but we are influenced by how this person holds himself, by the
quality of his presence, and by the attitude he exhibits.
None of us can escape the responsibility of the influence we exert on
those around us, whether it is for good or for ill. We can try to get away
from it by underestimating it, but it is there nonetheless. Often, we pull
back from taking responsibility for the power we have over people and our
surroundings because it seems so much easier that way. Yet it is so very
important to our lives that we don’t do this, because during every
moment that we are influencing another person, we are being given an
opportunity to learn and to make a contribution. Think of it. What if we
#d 31 D3

went to work every day and conducted ourselves as if we really counted, as
if what we did really mattered? How would that change our days?
When Catholics elect their pope, the man changes his name. The
Cardinal who was chosen to succeed Pope John Paul, changed his name
to Benedict, an act that perhaps reminded him that he now must not only
do more but be more. Whenever someone addresses him, he is reminded
of St. Benedict, his namesake, who was a remarkable leader.
If you had the opportunity to change your name into an identity you
would like to grow into, what would you change it to? It doesn’t have to
be from someone famous. I would take my father’s name, John. He is
long deceased, but I vividly remember his quietness, strength and warmth
– qualities I greatly admire. At this time in my life, I feel that I need them
more than ever.
Within health care, each one of us needs to have the qualities of a leader
if we are to become the best at what we do. We are all needed. What
qualities do you bring to the table? Have you accepted the fact that you
influence others in the way you work?
Our decision to be the best at what we do, to become more than we are
will have a lasting impact on those around us. We need to remember that
we are all leaders within our own daily world.
I will always be challenged to live up to my own best self. The decisions I make daily
about my attitude and behavior will affect the lives of many people around me.
#d 32 D3
The Power of Touch
Most patients appreciate the medical care they receive. We can enhance
their healing in small but meaningful ways during this stressful time in
their lives. Here’s a story showing how two nurses made that happen.
A nurse-supervisor was making her rounds when a patient stopped her in
the hallway. He told her that he had recently undergone a procedure to
contain a serious cancer. The operating room had been cold and sterile
and the table was hard. As he lay there, he was afraid and anxious. Then,
one of the nurses who was readying him for treatment touched his arm.
Another nurse stroked his hair while positioning him on the table. That
simple human touch put him at ease, gave him great comfort, and was
enormously reassuring. There was something very special about it. Maybe
it reminded him of his mother’s intimate, tender touch when he was a
child. Maybe it was a kind gesture that communicated human warmth and
connection, something many of us simply don’t experience very often.
For whatever reason, the nurses’ touch was terribly important.
“I have heard that hospitals are good at treating symptoms,” the patient
went on, “but not so good at treating people. I don’t feel that way here. I
felt that I was being treated, not just my cancer, and I wanted you to know
how important that was.”
#d 33 D3

It is possible to be technically proficient and have great clinical outcomes
and yet fail to heal the patient. These nurses knew this. Do you think
hospitals, physician practices, residences and treatment centers could be
transformed if we all became aware of our influence on one another and
on our patients?
Humility
Yesterday, as I stood behind a surgeon in the cafeteria line, we exchanged
small talk. “Doing anything for fun these days?” I asked, expecting him to
tell me about wilderness skiing, which I knew he loved. Instead, he was
unusually pensive. “No, not really,” he said quietly. In our previous talks,
he was always funny and quick to engage.

Today, I will be aware of the power I have to touch the lives of others in a deep and
meaningful way.
After a minute went by he said, “I just lost a patient. She was elderly,
but her heart was strong so we decided it was all right to operate. The
procedure was a success, but I just received a call. They told me she
stroked.” As he paid the cashier, his movements were stilted. This was all
he told me. For him, silence was preferable to any further conversation.
He seemed far away.

I knew this man well. He is a highly qualified physician, a national leader

in his area of expertise. He and his team made an informed clinical
decision, took control of the patient’s care, and did what their experience
told them was correct. Yet the patient died. I knew that this physician’s
silence was borne of care and a reflection of his sadness, but was he also
withdrawn because he now doubted his judgment?

Now and again, all of us are in a similar position. We do what we can.

Once we have done our best, we must relinquish control. We have all had
the experience of doing our job and expecting a certain result, only to be
shocked when the unexpected happens. The experience awakens us to the
fact that the world is less controllable than we imagine. This is a humbling
experience, especially when we have trained long and hard to be in
control. Not one of us is a master of the universe, no matter how good we
are at what we do and no matter how hard we try.

#d 34 D3 #d 35 D3

Humility, personal as well as professional, is not a value that we talk much
about in today’s world, yet it remains a remarkably important human
value for all of us within the health care community. It joins us in a
common understanding that we are limited beings. However, within our
limitations we are capable of greatness.
I will use my talents and knowledge to the best of my ability and let go of the results.
Humility is compatible with greatness; in fact it allows me to be even better at
what I do.
#d 36 D3
B eing the MayorOwnof Corner
Your
of the World
When we think about individuals who have had a large, positive influence
on the world and who seem utterly committed to their work, we may think
of some of the heroic figures of our times: Nelson Mandela, Albert
Schweitzer and Mother Theresa. And yet, each of us, no matter what our
position, will leave a lasting legacy when we love what we do and allow our
enthusiasm to touch everyone we meet. We don’t have to be in positions
where our job is monumental. What we do isn’t as important as how
we do it.
All of us bring different needs, ideas and motivations to our work. Many
of us think of employment primarily as a way to earn the money we need
to raise children, maintain a certain lifestyle or just get by. In other
words, work is merely a job.
Some individuals, more than we realize, experience work as a vocation.
They have an uncommon warmth, humanity and focus that guide them
to do ordinary things in the most extraordinary way. They are in
cubicles, carrying hammers, cleaning corridors, working in offices and at
patients’ bedsides.
We can find meaning in our work if we look for it. We may not hold
positions where our work or our decisions affect thousands of people.
But, we can search for the inner value of our contribution to our work
place. Whatever corner of the world we live in—and it might be a lot
smaller than the world of a Schwietzer, Mandela, and Mother Theresa—
we have a lasting impact on the people in our world.
#d 37 D3

Think about your day yesterday. Did something unexpected happen that
helped you notice how we influence one another? Maybe one of your
coworkers offered to cover for you while you made a necessary personal
phone call, or your boss made a point of acknowledging a presentation
you made in a meeting the other day, or another colleague emailed an
article to you about an issue you had been discussing. These are the daily
ways we impact one another.
And then, there are the larger ways in which we have a more profound and
lasting impact on others. If we have the privilege of working with patients,
offering a smile, holding a hand, stroking a forehead, listening to a story
through a veil of tears, calming parents, giving children a glass of orange
juice, showing kindness—all of these gestures spread good will throughout
our corner of the world and in turn we find meaning and satisfaction in
our work.
We can look around at the people who share our world. Discovering why
our coworkers do the work they do can open our eyes to a different way of
thinking about the world and our work. By opening our hearts and minds
to new perspectives and understanding about our coworkers, we may
touch their lives and also learn more about ourselves. Just having the
discussion may be a starting point for finding meaning in our work.
Today, I will think about what makes my work meaningful and how I can influence my
corner of the world. I will ask my coworkers why they work and we’ll learn and be
inspired by one another.
#d 38 D3
Considering the Patient’s Point of View
If we want to provide the best possible clinical care and service, then
we have to approach our patients and colleagues with the openness of
learners. Too often, we fail to open ourselves up to see that a patient is
feeling vulnerable and afraid, and is appealing to us for help. When
people are at home, they are relaxed and comfortable largely because
it’s familiar and predictable. But for most patients, a hospital is an
unfamiliar world; one that is foreign and can make them feel uneasy.
The hospital environment has an impact on a patient’s state of mind.
One of the more telling descriptions of how hospital design influences
patients is recounted in the book, House Thinking, published by
Harper/Collins. The author describes a hospital as an “anti-home” that
strips patients of control, privacy, individuality and sleep, while
bombarding them with unpleasant sights and sounds. These contribute to
illness rather than to healing. If this author is correct, the human
element becomes all the more important in giving patients some degree
of comfort.
The next time you are with a patient or colleague, look twice. The first
glance reveals the usual way we think of them; it is always limited. The
second provides an opportunity to see them in a new way.
I will consider the impact of being in a hospital, hospice or medical office from
the patient’s perspective. As my empathy grows, so does my natural ability to be a
healing presence.
#d 39 D3
 S pirituality and Work
Working in health care influences how we live. Every job shapes how we
use time, understand the world and even what we believe. Doctors tend to
live and think as doctors, nurses as nurses, and carpenters as carpenters.
Each develops a particular way of living that fits with the needs of their
jobs. This expression of their lives becomes their spirituality. In fact,
spirituality is most often described as a way of life.
Many people confuse spirituality with something otherworldly or an
activity or system of thought that is confined to churches, synagogues,
temples or mosques. Systems of thought that shape how we think of God
is theology, not spirituality. Spirituality has to do with the down-to-
earth, daily ways that we live our lives. We might use theology to describe
how we think about God, and spirituality as the way we live. For a
moment, think about spirituality in this way:
• Do our lives allow us time to pull back, read, and reflect?
• Do we get enough sleep?
• Do we have time for family and friends?
• Do we take the kind of vacations that nourish the spirit?
If the answers to these questions are no, we are likely living a spirituality
that is unhealthy for us. The state of our spirituality impacts the way we
are when we’re on the job. It influences every interaction we have. A
patient receiving identical treatment from two different nurses will have
remarkably different experiences depending on those nurses’ spiritual
condition. How we do what we do—the kind of presence we bring to
work—is of immense significance.
I will think about how I live. If I need to change, I will. Patients need it, my family
and friends will welcome it, and I will thrive.
#d 40 D3
B eing Strong and Vulnerable
Violence has a way of opening a wound in consciousness. On September
11th not so many years ago, we saw the Twin Towers crash to the ground.
We were witnesses to thousands of innocent people losing their lives.
Watching the tragedy awakened within us the overwhelming and unnerv-
ing awareness of our own vulnerability. That could easily have been us
and our loved ones. Churches filled, communities gathered, prayers
were voiced, tears fell, and strangers embraced. The wound awakened
and exposed feelings that the busyness of everyday life usually conceals.
We felt vulnerable.
Many of us believe that strength and vulnerability are opposites. The fact
is that nobody is stronger than the person who is truly vulnerable
because he is making a conscious choice to be open to experiencing a full
range of feelings.
We pride ourselves on being strong and self-directed and think of
vulnerability as a weakness. Instead of trying to deny our vulnerable
feelings, there is value in letting them influence the way we live, both at
home and at work.
Remember the way feelings of kinship developed between strangers on
the streets of New York, outside Pittsburgh where Flight 93 went down,
and Washington where the Pentagon was hit? All around the country,
people were opening themselves to their neighbors, to the gas station
attendants, to the cashiers at the corner store and to church members.
This spontaneous outpouring of openness was an act of pure vulnera-
bility. It awakened empathy.
#d 41 D3

The expression of empathy generates healing qualities in a hospital
setting and in us. To bring a healing presence to those we serve amounts
to so much more than being merely technically adept. It is the capacity to
be open to the suffering that we see and to use this state of mind to
empathize as one human being to another.
I will embrace my feelings of vulnerability and use them to bring a healing presence
to my work.
#d 42 D3
Overcoming Negativity
During a meeting of executives where our desire for organizational
excellence was being explained, I overheard an employee saying to the
person next to me, “One more unreachable goal being preached by
someone out of touch with the way things are.”
At first, I was discouraged. His words dampened my excitement. Soon, I
was angry. I felt like saying, “Why don’t you get on board or find a job that
you like?” Luckily, I held my tongue.
I say “luckily” because the man next to me did not need someone speak-
ing angrily to him. That would have made him feel even more frustrat-
ed. Everyone genuinely wants to excel. No one wakes up in the morning
saying, “I want to be mediocre.” Those negative feelings are learned.
Buried not so deeply within our hearts are feelings more closely akin to
the Marines’ motto, “Be the best that you can be.”
At the risk of sounding sentimental, naïve, or Pollyannaish, our chal-
lenge is to quiet the inner voices that tell us to expect disappointment
and mediocrity, and instead listen to the whisperings that lead us to excel.
These are the questions we need to ask ourselves:
• Are you reviewing or developing a bill to be sent to a patient? Make
it errorless.
• Are you wiping the brow of someone dying? Do it with care.
• Are you leading a meeting? Do some research, find the best way to
lead, and make the time valuable for all.
#d 43 D3

• Are you a leader? Provide a vision. Awaken, nourish and keep the
trust of your employees.
• Are you serving meals? Make sure that the patients receive what they
asked for.
• Are you reading a film? Look twice. Your eyes may see what others
missed. A patient depends on you.
Today, I will listen to the whisperings that lead me to excel. I will feel better about
my work and I will naturally be able to offer more to those I serve.
Healing with Intention
Recently, I had the opportunity to watch a highly accomplished artist
draw a man’s face. She would stare at him for a time, then look down at
her paper, draw a few lines, and then lift her gaze to study his face again.
She must have done this a hundred times, maybe more. She spent much
more time looking than drawing. The result was remarkable. Her sketch,
while not an exact likeness, caught the personality of the fellow in an
astonishing way. She saw what many of us who knew the man, never saw.
How did she do that? She certainly had the training and talent, but there
was something else at work. She took time, a lot of time, to notice the
person in front of her, and she understood the importance of looking
deeply, perhaps even beyond his physical features, to capture his essence.

Do you think patients know the difference between being cared for by
someone who is rushed, who simply wants to get the job done, and
someone who moves slowly enough and with a conscious awareness of the
impact their actions have on the people around them? Do you think our
coworkers can sense the same thing?

Reflect on health care as a science and an art. The science part is easy to accept.
Understanding the art is more of a challenge. I will acknowledge and nurture the art
in what I do by slowing down and working with intention.

#d 44 D3 #d 45 D3
B eing More Than ourProfessional Identity
There is an oft-quoted inscription on a tombstone in London that reads,
“Here lies Jeremy Brown, born a man and died a grocer.” That is a
humorous reminder of how easily our lives can become narrowed by
work. As the saying suggests, this fellow lost part of himself on his way to
becoming a grocer.
asks if there is anything else he can do for her. When that nurse dies,
no one will say of him that he was born a man but died a nurse. He was
born a human being and died a human being. The mark he leaves at
this hospital is far more than merely the proficiency he demonstrated
in the specialized aspects of this job. It‘s the way he touches the people
around him.

We are so much more than the talents we have developed, the roles we play Today, I will be true to myself and to my profession without sacrificing who I am. I
or the titles we carry. In hospitals, with the long work hours, continuous will bring who I am into what I do.
demands and immovable deadlines, it is easy to lose ourselves in relentless
activity. We even have name tags to remind everyone how much we are
defined by our job title.

Our personal life outside of work may not offer any relief. Often, by the
time we go home, we are tired and want to do little more than relax.
However, we may have family responsibilities as fathers, mothers, grand-
parents, or caretakers for a home-bound family member. It’s no won-
der our identity can get so tied up in our tasks and responsibilities.
Often, we think of ourselves as merely electricians, physicians, office
assistants, nurses, lab technicians, or accountants. I once heard a physi-
cian say, “I’m always somebody’s someone—a mother, physician, sister,
aunt, or boss. I wonder if I’m ever myself!” It sounds like she may iden-
tify with the grocer, born a woman but died a physician!

We can expand our sense of identity beyond job function by introducing

the element of humanity into our daily work experiences. This can be
seen in the simplest of tasks—for example, a nursing student who not only
makes a patient’s bed perfectly, but remembers to call her by name and

#d 46 D3 #d 47 D3
 Avoiding Burnout
In health care, hardly a day passes that we could call “normal.” In our line
of work, the people we deal with on a daily basis come to us with all kinds
of conditions, some severe and some moderate. Combine that with ever-
changing technology, and we have a thoroughly unpredictable situation—
every day. For some of us, this unpredictability is part of the challenge
and appeal that draws us into the field.
Some say that one reason so many health care professionals become
burned out is that they have to numb themselves to the intensity of life
about them simply to survive. This shield is a way to avoid feeling the
suffering of others. Anyone in a field that deals with human misery—like
welfare workers, homicide investigators or firefighters—are confronted by
the rawness of life in a way that the rest of the population is not. They,
like us, have to make a choice about how much of the suffering of others
to let in and how much to keep at bay. They have to keep out enough to
avoid a meltdown and yet not so much that they lose their humanity. For
self-preservation alone, they have to maintain some sense of balance
because they’re in this for the long run.
For those with direct patient contact, it’s a matter of knowing how much of
the suffering of others we can take in without hurting ourselves. But even
if we’re not on the front lines of patient care, we can still choose how much
of ourselves we want to make vulnerable and open to the human condition.
This may come up in our dealings with our coworkers’ personal lives, or
once-removed as we support our colleagues as they go through trying
emotional experiences in the course of their work with patients.
It may seem that if we allow ourselves to be open and transparent to
everyday sufferings, we will become depressed. But in fact, we will find
that this approach will enrich our lives and give meaning to our work.
This moment, like every moment, provides an invitation to awaken to the sacredness
of the ordinary world. Today, I will pause and reflect on the meaning of my work. I
will choose to make myself open to the suffering of others.

Everyone handles this problem differently. Victor Frankl was a famous

physician, psychiatrist and healer who faced the ultimate human nightmare
of living through the holocaust. He then graced us with his writing. At one
point in his practice as a physician, he noticed two nurses who worked in
the same office performing similar procedures but approaching them in
completely different ways. One found her job drudgery; the other thought
it was the most meaningful work she could ever imagine. The difference
was in their awareness. One thought of herself as helping others; the other
considered herself merely a machine giving shots.

#d 48 D3 #d 49 D3
 Going Beyond the Obvious
On a recent flight to Denver, the pilot left the cockpit and personally We can take our profession to the next level by understanding our
greeted every passenger while looking them in the eye. His words to my patients’ needs beyond the unspoken.
wife and I were, “Welcome, I’m glad you’re aboard.”
Today, I will remember that patients may be unable to voice their fears. I will do what
After he finished his rounds, he returned to the cockpit and made an I can to calm their fears and create a feeling of safety.
announcement. “Welcome, I’m your captain. We will take every effort to
make this trip both pleasant and safe. I have three children. The First
Officer also has three. We wouldn’t be flying if we didn’t feel safe. Now
settle back and enjoy the ride.” Curiously, I was not aware of being
anxious before he came through the cabin. However, I must have been,
because afterwards, I felt particularly calm. One man, doing his job,
made a difference on that plane. He set a tone, and created a tangible
feeling of safety and caring.

There are pilots who are good at the technical side of flying. There are
also pilots who know how to be personable leaders as well. Our pilot fell
into the second group. He spoke to the more complex needs of the
customers not only to arrive in one piece, but to have peace of mind
along the way. In other words, he addressed his passenger’s unspoken
fears of flying.

Patients enter a hospital with many unspoken fears. Most of the time they
don’t say a word either because they’re not in touch with their feelings
or they’re embarrassed to express them. Some do not want to make
waves. For the most part, they have an underlying belief in the technical
proficiency of the professional taking care of them, yet most of them
secretly yearn to be reassured anyway that they are in good hands and that
we care as much about their well being as they do.

#d 50 D3 #d 51 D3
 Love in Action
Walking down the long corridor of the oncology unit late one evening, I
paused to look into a patient’s room and noticed a nurse sitting quietly
on the side of a bed holding the hand of an elderly, closed-eye patient.
In another room, a caregiver raised the head of a particularly weak man
to help him swallow. In a third room, an aide was changing the soiled
linen of a patient’s bed.
I wondered how these caregivers do this, hour after hour, day after day.
Don’t they get discouraged seeing so many helpless patients? How did
they develop sensitivity to the needs of their families, particularly those of
dying patients? How do they keep their warmth and good humor when
faced with so much suffering?
Maybe it is because they think as Paul who said, “…love bears all things,
believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.”
There is no way to write love into a job description. No one gets paid
extra if they add that component to their work. Only you can recognize
how much it contributes to the quality of your work. While we may be
hesitant to use this word in a work setting, love still might be the most
appropriate word to describe the quality of service from those caregivers
as I observed it on the oncology unit that night, and as I have seen it time
and again within hospice.
If you are afraid to use the word because it seems too sentimental, just
wander through hospital corridors and in and out of patient rooms,
watch the staff quietly tending to their patients and it will challenge that
#d 52 D3
way of thinking. There is nothing maudlin about those who care for
patients, particularly patients who are helpless and facing death.
Hospice has something else to teach us. We know that its whole job is to
help people face their own imminent death and confront all the fear that
brings up. Hospice workers know that nothing conquers fear better than
love. Death has a way of simplifying life. “[Even if I can] move mountains,
but do not love, I am nothing,” said St. Paul. Love can be found every-
where: in kitchens, operating rooms, cubicles, patient rooms, nursing
stations, and offices of every sort. Sometimes, we simply forget to notice.
We do need our machines, monitors, specialized techniques, and
advanced medical procedures. Emails, cell phones, and pagers are
equally necessary. However, for a hospital to be called great, it also needs
love. We must care for one another—no matter how uncomfortable we
may feel using the language that describes it.
Today, I won’t be afraid of the word “love” when I think about the work I do. I will
see the power of love all around me, as a healing force among colleagues, between
caregivers, patients and their families.
#d 53 D3
 R especting Others’ Inner Story
My assistant was looking forward to retiring in two months. While she
loved her job, she could hardly wait to begin enjoying her retirement
years. In fact, she marked the days. “72, 71, 70 …” We could all feel her
excitement. Amazingly, her attention to detail seemed to sharpen rather
than diminish as she thought about life-after-work.
For several months, she had been treated for asthma and had been
experiencing a lack of energy, but every time she thought about the
future, she seemed to get her energy back. Shortly before her last day of
work, she was admitted to the hospital with pneumonia. Soon, she was
readmitted. That’s when we all found out she had cancer. Treatment
began. She never did return to work.
I had known this woman for years. We worked closely together, yet I did
not guess the burden she carried. Until the end, neither did she.
Sometimes, we are even a mystery to ourselves. With that recognition in
mind, it is important to understand that even with the people we work
with day in and day out, we will never see every dimension of their lives,
the burdens they carry or their loves.
Work as a Sacred Act:
Creating Places of Healing
Let’s use today to reflect on the significance of what we are doing.
Whether we are mopping a floor or changing a bed, we are actually creat-
ing a place of healing. No wonder some philosophers and theologians
think of work as participating in the work of God. We are co-creating,
and there is a sacredness about our work.
Recognizing the sacredness of what we do—whatever our responsibilities
might be—can be unsettling. Why? Because we realize that nothing we do
is insignificant; every act shapes this world for better or worse, and we are
responsible for whatever we do—or don’t do.
Today I will recognize the sacredness of my work. I will be aware that I am creating
a place of healing. I will also acknowledge the efforts of a colleague.

I will recognize the inner life of colleagues that may look different from what I see
on the outside. I will acknowledge and respect them for their inner life and for the
struggle they are experiencing.

#d 54 D3 #d 55 D3
 Taking Personal Responsibility
Good leaders inspire others. They demonstrate their willingness and
ability to take personal responsibility for the very thing they are asking
others to do. If a nursing manager has spent years taking care of patients,
she can speak with authority and credibility when she asks other nurses to
take on a new task.
When Peter Drucker was asked what makes a good leader, he recalled
studying about World War I in his high school history class. One of the
students asked the teacher why one side won while the other lost when all
the factors were basically equal. “After all, during that war, men fought
one another in hand to hand combat, often advancing from one fox hole
to the next, as they pushed forward or retreated. And, the armies were
about the same size.”
The teacher quickly responded. “Because not enough generals were
killed.” This shocked everyone until he explained that the generals on
one side lacked leadership. They weren’t willing to stand behind their
decisions enough to put their lives on the line, so they couldn’t generate
the necessary commitment from their troops to win.
Effective leaders are always out in front. This is a dangerous place to be,
especially if they are in the line of fire. But they are obligated to take the
same risks they ask others to take.
Within hospitals, clinics, treatment centers and physician practices, we
are not engaged in a battle. However, all of us are leaders because those
around us are heavily influenced by our attitudes and actions. Whether or
#d 56 D3
not we have that title, we must be willing to step out, to speak up, and have
the courage to take responsibility for our efforts and those of our team.
There are different levels of personal responsibility. It’s one thing to take
personal responsibility for one’s own life. It is another to take personal
responsibility within a group, especially if we are not the designated
leader. Since we work within groups, it is easy to hide, to relinquish
accountability, and to wait for others to take responsibility for what needs
to be done. That’s a set up for failure for any organization.
Given the risks involved in taking personal responsibility at work, why
should we do it? Because when we take personal responsibility, we create a
healing environment. Patient care is advanced when every physician,
nurse, office assistant, and all support staff recognize that they are leaders.
George Eliot wrote that, “It is never too late to be what you might have
been.” It is never too late to be a leader. The opportunity is as close as the
next encounter with a patient or colleague.
Today, I will consciously take responsibility for my work and for my life. I will test
out the title, “leader” and see how it feels and how it changes the way I work and
the attitude I bring to my work.
#d 57 D3
 Valuing Everyone’s Job
The origins of Labor Day as a holiday rose during a time when laborers
had few rights and even fewer days away from their jobs. While the social
and political issues that led to the formation of the labor movement in the
late 1800s have changed, the opportunity to recognize and celebrate the
value of our work has not.
Every one of us contributes to patient care. A nurse’s work is invaluable. A
physician’s irreplaceable. So is the unit clerk’s, electrician’s, transporter,
and the people who work in an office off-site making sure that the patient’s
files are accurate, that safety is maintained, and that we provide the
highest quality of service to those who trust us with their care.
For every person who touches a patient, there are three unseen employ-
ees supporting that caregiver. Every one is needed. While we may have
differing gifts, no one individual need be valued more than another.
Find a moment to recall the value of what you are doing and the impor-
tance of your organization’s mission. There is a sacredness in what we do.
Today, I will reflect on the importance of all of the jobs in my work setting. I will
think about how all of us are interconnected and how all of our jobs are important in
achieving our overall goal of providing high quality patient care.
#d 58 D3
Rising Above Our Pain
Yesterday, I marveled at how an employee spoke with a disgruntled visitor
to the hospital. While five or six persons were waiting for the elevator, one
of them was clearly agitated. He bellowed out to no one in particular,
“The valet who parked my car didn’t even ask if I needed a wheelchair.
I had to walk here.” His manner was so forceful that it silenced everyone
in the elevator. In that uncomfortable moment, a nurse turned toward
him and said in the most disarming way, “I’m sorry. How can I help
you now?”
How was she able to do that? What gave her the presence of mind to
respond with that kind of empathy? Evidently, she was able to see beyond
his gruff manner and pick up on his more vulnerable feelings. The nurse
did not seem intimidated by his aggressive manner.
When I went up to visit patients the other day, I was told of a 55-year old
woman who was being referred to hospice because of advanced cancer.
Amazingly, years ago her child had died of a similar type of cancer at the age
of six. She was not belligerent the way the visitor on the elevator was. On the
contrary, she was soft-spoken and questioning. “Why is this happening to
me? To our family?” She could have allowed her pain to transform into
anger and a sense of injustice. Instead, she bore her pain with dignity.
All of us carry painful memories. It may help to know that we can use our
pain to develop more empathy to care for others.
As health care professionals, we do not have the luxury to let our personal
pain surface and drive us toward a preoccupation with ourselves. We have
#d 59 D3

to be able to distance ourselves from our personal pain long enough to be
present to others. The nurse waiting for the elevator seemed able to do
this. That is a gift that we all need.
We will have “bad days.” However, if these bad days extend into months
or years and we cannot get over our preoccupation with our problems, we
should not be in health care. Our patients need professionals who can
focus on their needs.
We are engaged in a profession where we must place our patients’ needs
first. It is easy to say this, but difficult to do. No wonder health care is said
to be a calling as well as a job.
If I’m going through a difficult time and the pain is still too fresh to allow me to be
a healing presence, maybe I should take a short break from my job. Perhaps with
time, I can use my painful experience as a source of empathy and healing.
#d 60 D3
Living an Examined Life
A few years ago, Eugene O’Kelly, age 53, the Chairman and CEO of
the huge accounting firm KPMG, was told by his physician that he
would probably die of an aggressive brain cancer within three months.
He did. But before he died, he decided to write of his experience in a
book entitled Chasing Daylight: How My Forthcoming Death Transformed My Life.
The memoir documents how it did. He said he wrote it for everyone
who will die—that is, all of us.
In the book, he explains that he took four actions.
First, he decided against chemotherapy. “It may buy time but not much,
maybe a few weeks.”
Second, he did all the routine things he needed to do, like getting his
finances in order and planning his funeral.
Third, he decided to “unwind” his relationships, find closure with the
important people in his life. It entailed having final conversations that
others seemed to find more difficult than he.
Last, he tried to fill his final days with perfect moments. “I’ve always
focused planning for the future, now I have to learn the true value of
the present.”
Cornelia Dean, the accomplished author and often critical reviewer of
books wrote, “The meditations on turning ordinary experiences into
perfect moments is perhaps the most useful guidance he offers to those of
us not yet facing the timetable he confronted. Finding perfection in the
#d 61 D3

mundane is a skill too many leave underdeveloped, and undervalued.”
(NYTimes, 3/14/06)
Maybe there is a Eugene O’Kelly in all of us. In this memoir, he does not
counsel us to drop from the workforce. Nor does he devalue the need to
plan for the future and passionately engage in life. He does challenge us
to relish the present, something he had forgotten until he heard the
words “about a hundred days” from his doctor.
His wife, child, and colleagues thought of his life as a gift to them. His
gift to us is the reminder that each of us has a profound life beneath the
frenetic pace with which we sometimes live. We, too, are invited to live
an examined life.
I will make the time to be still today. In that stillness, I will examine my life. Is this
the life I want to lead? What changes can I make today?
#d 62 D3
Taking Personal Responsibility
for Patient Safety
While we make every effort to ensure the safety of our patients, medical
errors happen even at the best of hospitals, and often at a much greater
rate than any of us wish to admit. When these errors occur, it is especially
heartbreaking and disturbing since we are deeply committed to healing
not harming.
When an error occurs, blaming a clinician, caregiver, group or depart-
ment will not fix the problem. Instead, we—as individuals and as a team—
must face the error, identify the elements that led up to it, and collec-
tively take responsibility for it. These are the first steps in creating a cul-
ture focused on keeping our hospitals safe.
But how can we promote a culture of patient safety if we don’t feel safe
about speaking out when we see a problem? We cannot. We must create
a culture in which we are free to tell the truth without fear of losing
our jobs.
Unfortunately, we sometimes have to reveal problems anonymously. In
healthier cultures, we can bring the issue up directly to a manager or to
other team members. If our hearts and intentions are squarely on the
goal of improving safety we will be heard.
Together, we can create a work place that is committed to safety not just
in words but in actions.
Am I doing all that I can to make my work place safe today? Today, I’ll have the
courage to speak out and work collaboratively to create a safe work place.
#d 63 D3
Remembering that Belong
We
to One Another
This evening, many of our patients, staff, and physicians will begin to
observe Passover. These are days of remembrance filled with gratitude
and hope, notwithstanding the memory of past slavery and oppression.
On Thursday, Friday and Sunday, Christians will celebrate the memory
of the death and resurrection of Jesus. These days are also filled with the
sentiments of forgiveness and the promise of life on the other side
of death.
Many of our patients are active within their churches, synagogues,
temples, and mosques. During these special days, let’s remember again
that even though we have differing beliefs and vastly differing views of
the world, we share a common humanity where our differences can be
seen as truly a gift.
As Mother Teresa reminded us, “If we have no peace, it is because we
have forgotten that we belong to each other.” Despite all our differences,
we must strengthen the belief that we belong to one another. It is easy to
forget this sentiment in the rush of a day filled with responsibilities.
This week, holy week on many calendars, is another timely reminder of
the countless opportunities we have to care for others at home, in love
relationships, with strangers and at work.
Today, I will look for ways to connect with my coworkers, patients, their families and
my loved ones by reflecting on what it means to “belong to one another.”
#d 64 D3
Continuous Learning
During the monthly meeting of physician executives, it was reported that
our nursing partnership with one of the community colleges had been
highly successful. “We have thirty students, most with their bachelor
degrees, all engaged in a one year accelerated nursing program.” Then
she added, “One of the students is a practicing physician.” Here we had a
doctor at the pinnacle of his career who found it necessary to go back to
school because he wanted to enhance his knowledge.
We seldom hear of a physician enrolling in a nursing program. By taking
the unusual step of returning to school, that physician suggested that he
was aware of the need to continuously learn. The longer we practice our
profession, the easier it is to overlook this need.
While we may not be inclined to return to formal schooling, all of us
need to be learners especially in medicine because technology changes
so rapidly. When we recognize the need to learn, our gratitude and
appreciation for one another grow as we realize that everyone has
something to share with us.
We all learn from one another. Colleagues are our teachers and so are
patients. Turn toward them with an attitude of learning and patient
care will be enhanced. Even our children are affirmed when we learn
from them. And, to the physician who has enrolled in nursing school,
thank you.
Whether through formal schooling or through the daily opportunities that arise
at work, I will see my colleagues, patients and all with whom I come in contact as
my teachers.
#d 65 D3
 Being Honest
When we read about athletes or business magnates, or listen to stories unfortunate, we can learn to think of ourselves as less valuable than oth-
about people in the news, it is striking how our attention is turned to the ers. That is equally destructive. It is also dishonest because it is not true.
value of honesty. In so many stories, we can see that self-interest, greed
and the need for immediate gratification squeeze out integrity. For some, When we are honest with ourselves and with one another, we can’t help
there’s more of a pull to meet their own needs than to do the right thing. but become in touch with the universality of the human condition,
which levels the playing field, and opens us up to deeply appreciating
We see how dishonest individuals can be when judging skating perfor- and valuing our colleagues’ unique talents. It releases the tremendous
mances that favor their own country, how athletes use drugs to give them- energy of love and tolerance in our dealings with others. It all begins
selves an unfair advantage, and how executives of major corporations with you and me.
tolerate and sometimes sanction an executive culture of deceit. All of
these news items test our trust in organizations and people. I will be honest with myself and with others. By being true to myself and to others,
I grow as a person. Honesty is an eternal value.
The attempt to be honest is a shared human struggle. As employees within
health care organizations, we have to continually ask ourselves if we are
being ethical as well as powerful. Do we take enough trouble to protect the
individual? Do we bill accurately? Do we document truthfully? Are
managers free of conflict of interest when they select vendors? Do doctors
favor one drug company over another? Do we speak the truth even if it
might put our jobs on the line? These are daunting questions. How we
answer them says a great deal about how much integrity we have.

Usually, we think of honesty in terms of behavior, that is, whether what

we do is right or wrong. But, we can also think of it in terms of being
honest with ourselves.

We are all valuable, but no one is worth more than any other. When we
slip into thinking of ourselves as better, more important, or more valued
than others, it won’t be long before we act as if we’re entitled. Just as

#d 66 D3 #d 67 D3
 Attitude Adjustment at Work
Three news items relate to how our attitude influences who we are at
work, how we do our job, and how we influence others and the work place
in general. The first article found in a professional publication covers
depressed individuals who tend to be more absent-minded on the job,
and it reveals how this emotional state seriously affects their performance.
The second article from a local newspaper reports on unionization
efforts taking place at two hospitals. The nurses who were interviewed
expressed frustration and outrage over what they viewed as unreasonable
demands from administrators to interact more with patients and families.
The third article comes from a national newspaper. It reported on the
retirement of a nun who had cared for neglected children selflessly and
without acclaim. Each of these articles illustrates the impact that our
attitudes have on the quality of our work, and conversely, on the impact
that work has on us and our quality of life.
First: The Journal of the American Medical Association’s (JAMA) special
report on the topic of depression. The research studies noted the
prevalence of depression within the general population and how it
remains an under-treated disease. One of the authors coined the word
“presenteeism” (“here but not here,” a play on the word “absenteeism”)
to describe those who show up, but who work absent mindedly precisely
because they are depressed. Several authors suggested that these individ-
uals brought their problems to work rather than found them there. When
people are struggling with their own unhappiness, it’s hard for them to be
generous with others.
Second: The article in a local newspaper reporting on the efforts to
unionize two local hospitals. The reporter quoted several nurses who spoke
#d 68 D3
of poor working conditions, low morale, and administrators who laid
“burdensome” rules on them—including the request that they put people
first and the suggestion that they be pleasant when serving patients!
Third: Sounding a different note, the New York Times’s article on the
retirement of a 75-year-old sister. She left her job as the administrator
of Covenant House—the worldwide organization of homes serving
teenage street people. It was a touching account of a dedicated woman
who devoted her life to care for unwanted children. This is an unnoticed
woman who, throughout her life, clearly brought an attitude of sympathy,
selflessness and unconditional love into her work.
What do these three seemingly disparate articles have in common? They
identify how our attitudes help shape the work place. The JAMA article
points out the prevalence of depression. The local unionization article
highlights how attitudes of resentment, borne of depression and perhaps
burnout, make even the most basic of job requirements—courtesy and
compassion—burdensome, and how this collective negativity is like a
poison. From a different angle, the New York Times article shows how a
sister with a selfless, loving attitude and no need for recognition, shapes
the culture of her work place.
These articles highlight in very different ways how the attitudes that we
bring to our work cannot be separated from the quality of the work that we
do. So, if we can become aware of our disposition (depressed, resentful
or generally happy), we can see how this affects our work. And through
awareness, we can take steps to adjust our attitude, not only so that we can
feel better about our work, but also about ourselves and our lives.
#d 69 D3

Take a fresh look at your coworkers and notice the number of high-
functioning, caring, dedicated individuals with whom you work. We learn
from one another, and what is truly surprising is how we are changed
when we express our appreciation of who they are and how they work.
Today, I will reflect on the attitude I bring to my work. I will look at my coworkers
with new eyes and find ways to express my appreciation for who they are and what
they do.
#d 70 D3
The Quiet RealityUnderneath the Busyness
This has been an incredibly busy week. Next week, it will probably be the
same because sickness and death will always be with us. No one will say to
us, “Don’t worry, you don’t have to take care of me today. Just come back
when you’re relaxed.” Seven days a week, twenty-four hours a day, blood
needs to be taken, lab tests run, rooms readied, and meals provided.
We don’t cease to be human when we choose to become health care pro-
fessionals, yet our work demands that we operate at a machine-like rate,
a machine with parts that never wear down.
However, when we remember the quiet reality that is underneath all the
busyness, work can be a prayer. It is a wordless kind of prayer that is
expressed through caring hands, thoughtful gestures and loving heart.
Wherever we work, whatever we do, and however busy we are, we can
remember that work is hallowed action. This is an invaluable perspective
that changes how we think about work.
I will take time despite my busyness to slow down and know that there is another
reality being served in all that I do. My hands, my efforts and my intentions all
contribute to a healing and a deeper reality. My work and my life take on a deeper
meaning and everyone is better served.
#d 71 D3
 Slowing Down and Feeling Connected
This morning I awoke around 2 a.m.; I turned on the radio and Aaron
Copeland’s Letter From Home was playing. Words cannot describe the
feeling of listening to that piece in the silence. My wife was sleeping, the
lights of the city were bright, but there were no cars or people to be seen.
The combination of darkness, lights, my wife sleeping, stillness and the
music were striking. The music expressed what words cannot: the feeling
of being apart, wanting comfort, yet feeling connected.
With the press of everyday activities, we can forget how connected we
really are. Unfortunately, it often takes a crisis to awaken to our ever
present, deep yearning to connect with one another.
One of our employees was called for military service. After he returned,
he said, “I really appreciated all the people in my department who wrote
to me so often. I can’t tell you what that meant to me. Unless you were
there, you can’t understand.”
Those of us who are home may not fully comprehend, but we can make a
conscious decision to make gestures that connect us with others. A phone
call or a note can keep us in contact with those who are apart.
Today, I will slow down and feel the deep connection that I have with family, friends,
coworkers and patients. I will express the appreciation I have for them.
#d 72 D3
Expressing Gratitude Without Words
The experience of loss is often the soil from which gratitude rises. My
father died when I was a teenager. As the years pass, the memories of him
become even more vivid. Yet, I also live with the regret that I didn’t get to
know him as an adult. I suspect, however, that if he were living, I would
take his presence for granted and not realize that every day I had with him
was a gift.
Soon after the September 11th attack, I was listening to a reporter inter-
viewing a cameraman who was severely injured in the collapse of the Twin
Towers. He had the good fortune to have been rescued by firemen. When
asked on television if he wanted to thank those who rescued him, he began
to cry. “Words of thanks do not come close to expressing what I feel.” He
continued to cry and did not utter a word of thanks. He did not have to.
The very depth of his emotions communicated how he felt. Interestingly,
the firemen didn’t have to speak either. They, too, let their feelings speak
for themselves.
Words are important, but how we are present to one another is even
more so.
Today, I will try to express my gratitude through words and also through my way
of being.
#d 73 D3
 Embracing a Fresh Perspective
For those who have been in health care for years, we have to keep per- ‘traditional’ family Christmas with trees and lights and a turkey with
spective on our work. Here are examples of two people in vastly different stuffing. And then, there were the hospice patients right on my floor.
careers, who used their own experiences to broaden their perspective. What was their experience of ‘the holidays’? Having this perspective lead
me straight out of my self-pity.”
A highly decorated pilot and astronaut returned to earth after being in
orbit six months with two Russian cosmonauts. Earlier in his career as a Everyone in health care knows that it is easy to become run down. Finding
fighter pilot, he had flown missions against the Russians. Reporters asked a fresh perspective invigorates us and our careers!
him how he was able to work so closely with people who had once been
his enemy. He replied, “When I see and hear of people in conflict, Today, I will not be afraid to take time out of my day for reflection. I will embrace
I remember what it was like to look at earth from afar. From that distance, the new perspective that emerges.
it is obvious that earth is small and its people dependent one on the
other. I thought how petty, petty, petty. I wish everyone could travel
in orbit. We are a lot smaller than we think.” It is remarkable how
dramatically one person’s perspective can shift.

In a second example, a nurse shared her experience of working over the

winter holidays. “This year, I had to be on duty the week between
Christmas and New Year’s. Work just seemed different. The census was
down, there were fewer cars in the parking lot, and other nurses were
taking time off to be with their families. I started feeling sorry for myself
until I thought about the soldiers in Iraq and how far away from home
they must feel. My thoughts also turned to the homeless, to prisoners,
and to the aged living alone. None of these people were having the

#d 74 D3 #d 75 D3
 Leading with Courage and Faith
David McCullough’s book, 1776, could just as well have been titled,
“George Washington” because most of its text describes his leadership
style. Without significant support from the government that appointed
him, without money, without a professional army, Washington inspired
his troops, and eventually won a war that seemed, at times, unwinnable.
All those who signed the Declaration of Independence also needed per-
sonal courage. At the time of the signing, victory was far from assured.
Many signees lost their property and their lives as a result of signing.
George Washington, while an effective leader, suffered lingering bouts of
depression. Numerous times, he offered his resignation to Congress. He
not only doubted himself, but others criticized him for his indecisiveness.
We, too, need courage. We will likely not be killed, lose our homes or be
jailed because of our beliefs. Yet, there is a cost involved when we accept
our role as leaders. If our efforts don’t pay off, our reputation may be
tarnished, we may suffer a disappointing outcome, and relationships may
become strained.
History has been kind to General Washington and to the founding
fathers. Historians agree that he was a remarkable leader and whatever
doubts they had, they did not let them get in their way. In spite of our
own doubts about our ability to lead, we cannot stand back and be
passive. Is the effort worth it? Yes.
I will take responsibility and bring understanding and courage into all that I do. I will
be willing to make the necessary sacrifices if it means greater healing for others.
I will also be rewarded with a feeling that I’ve done my best and brought the best
of myself to my work.
#d 76 D3
R ecognizing the Invisible Heroes
At a celebration honoring our faithful employees, the administration
treated everyone to a film at the local IMAX theatre. As they were leaving
the theater, an employee standing in line remarked to her guest, “The
nice thing about movies is that when they’re over, the names of the
people who contributed to the film are listed. When you work in health
care, there are no acknowledgements at the end of the day!”
For every employee who works directly with patients, there are three who
work behind the scenes to support them. These key people are often
invisible. We take their work for granted. An evening honoring long-
service employees is one reminder of how many individuals work self-
lessly, year after year, behind the scenes, in jobs that are immensely
important though not often recognized. There are never enough awards
to acknowledge those deserving recognition.
Consider those in buying, billing, or sterile processing. Is their work
and presence affirmed often? Think about those in Central Supply
working the night shift to replenish supplies to be used the next day, the
employees who work continuously to organize patient records, the EAP
counselors who respond to employees-in-need, or to the hundreds of
unnamed employees who work behind the scenes to maintain our
hospitals, treatment centers, and offices.
There is goodness, engagement, and dedication all around us! Seeing
goodness changes how we think, what we say, and how we do what we do.
When you pass someone in the hallway, take a moment to say, “Nice job.”
Send an email to tell a coworker how much her idea made your job
#d 77 D3

easier. When you work as a team, before everyone disperses, offer a word
of appreciation. Our challenge is to find ways to express our appreciation
continuously. The opportunity is as close as the next moment.
Today, I will start the trend of thanking my coworkers for their good work. I can
change my work environment with this small but important act.
#d 78 D3
Making a Mark
After a chaplain returned from being with hospice patients one day, she
said to me quietly, “This work really makes a mark on me.”
The Chief Executive Officer of a hospital who was returning to work
following hip replacement surgery, started an early morning meeting by
commenting, “I’m not a real demonstrative person when it comes to
prayer, but I’ll tell you that being a patient has really left a mark on me.
When you are going under anesthesia, you can’t help thinking about
things a little differently. I’m grateful I can return to work and I’m
grateful for our staff. I pray for the courage and strength to do what has
to be done to improve patient care.”
The phrase “making a mark” has been used throughout history. It is used
in the Hebrew Scriptures to describe Jacob’s wrestling with an angel; the
struggle left a permanent mark on his thigh. The chaplain, the CEO and
Jacob all went through life-altering experiences and their perspectives
were forever changed.
The experiences of illness and injury also shape the way we see things.
Patients are transformed by illness. When someone is hospitalized,
bedridden or in pain, life slows down and he sees the world differently.
The experience rearranges his priorities. Afterwards, he lives and works
in a different way.
What is true for patients is also true for health care professionals. No one
can be in health care for long without being “marked.” Many of us labor
#d 79 D3

in offices, kitchens or workshops. Whether or not our work brings us in
direct contact with patients, we have an opportunity—even a responsibil-
ity—to bring a healing presence to others. To do this, we must let illness
make its mark on us. It is a remarkably good teacher.
I will allow my work to leave its mark on me and use this altered perspective to make
me more available to the healing needs of others.
#d 80 D3
Stop and Breathe to Gain Perspective
Hospitals, like so many businesses, have coffee carts at their entrances.
Patients and staff can purchase drinks, sandwiches and snacks. These carts
create a welcoming presence as well as provide a needed service.
Something out of the ordinary occurred at one of them last week. Late in
the afternoon, twenty or so minutes after closing, the clerk behind the
counter was counting money. A young mother, who had just spent the last
several hours tending to her own mother in the emergency room, came
up to the cart with her small boy, and asked for a bagel to give her son,
who had missed lunch. The clerk, who was tired and stressed, said curtly,
“The cart is closed.” The mother, who was equally anxious, was suddenly
beside herself. She needed to placate her cranky child at a time when she
was fast approaching a breaking point. An argument ensued and quickly
escalated to the point of name-calling as others looked on nervously.
After the woman and vendor left the scene, many of the witnesses were
still in the area. One of them noticed my employee badge. She came over
to discuss what happened. “Classic. Ugly.” she said, “Two stressed out
people who couldn’t communicate. It’s that simple. If the girl behind the
counter hadn’t been tired, she would have reached for a couple of the
unsold bagels, given them to the woman and said ‘Here, they’re on the
house.’ If the mother hadn’t been panicked about her own mother, she
would have just gone to the vending machine down the hall.”
Everyone can either add to or dispel tension when tempers are about to
flare in a hospital. Sometimes that requires making adjustments and
extending ourselves beyond “the rules” because we see the anxiety and
desperation just below the surface. In this case, the vendor had not
#d 81 D3

responded with any awareness beyond her own exhaustion and snapped at
the mother. If this vendor had recognized the pain beneath the mother’s
demands, she would have reacted with compassion and given her what she
needed. It simply requires transcending the intensity of the moment.
The woman who approached me afterwards and sized up the situation,
immediately identified a solution. She was only able to do that because
she had the comfortable distance of an outsider. This is the value of a
detached presence.
When I’m tired or unhappy, I will stop, take a deep breath and collect myself. I will
transcend the immediate tension of the moment by remembering the stress that
others may be feeling and act from a higher place of compassion.
#d 82 D3
Gratitude Is a Gift
Within health care, there is a tangible “culture of giving.” Large numbers
of our colleagues offer their services in numerous ways within their own
communities when they are away from work.
But some look to the world at large. I recently received an email from an
employee who volunteered her services in Botswana, Africa. This is what
she wrote about her experience:
“I’ve had many insights during the past two weeks. One is how lucky we are back home to have
water and electricity. Many times here I have been in places without water or electricity, or
both. Now I realize how lucky I am. I hope never to take them for granted again.”
In the land of plenty, it’s so easy to take things for granted that others
consider treasures. A grateful heart is a gift that will change our
perception. Once awakened, it will influence what we notice, how we
feel, and even how we work. The incalculable reward of being generous
comes from the awakening of gratitude within our own hearts.
Gratitude is the unintended gift I receive from giving to others. I will give that gift
to myself.
#d 83 D3
 Using Depression as a Motivation
This was a banner week: JCAHO awarded our hospital full accreditation
for the next three years. What made this award even sweeter was that it was
unexpected. All week, the surveyors were sending signals that we were
failing to meet Standards. We had been working under the expectation of
receiving “conditional” accreditation.
When we received notification that we were awarded full accreditation,
you could feel a lift in spirits spread from employee to employee. We
knew we still needed to improve, but there was also a surge of energy to
improve. Soon after the word was out, I was walking past the office of an
administrator who had played a significant role in the accreditation
process and heard her remark, “I feel so much lighter now.”
While she surely wouldn’t want to admit to it, I would say that before
receiving the news, she and the others had been experiencing a feeling
of depression—that is, they were de-pressed, or pressed down. No one
likes to be labeled “depressed,” so they had been carrying a weight,
acknowledged or not. When the administrator said she felt lighter, she
revealed how depressed she had been.
The team went through the type of heaviness that comes when individu-
als who are deeply invested and engaged in a project are disappointed.
Anyone who has ever played on a sports team knows what this feels like.
The challenge is knowing how to rise above it.
Everyone wants to excel. Is reaching for success risky? You bet. Could you
be setting yourselves up for disappointment? Possibly. Is it worth the
risk? Yes.
#d 84 D3
Winston Churchill knew something about achieving remarkable results in
the face of defeat. Most people don’t know this, but Churchill had experi-
enced nothing but failure throughout much of his life. He lost many elec-
tions, he lost the esteem of his family and his colleagues during different
periods in his life, and he had spent some years wandering aimlessly,
looking for direction. He was a man who knew failure intimately. And yet,
toward the end of his life, in an event that forever shaped the course of our
world, he rose to his greatest potential during the battle against Adolph
Hitler in World War II. As the people of London were being barraged
by daily bombings, they clung to his speeches that inspired them to keep
up their courage. At a time when England was about to lose a war, his was
the voice that they welcomed. He led the country through this ominous
period. He understood failure not as an end but as a teacher.
Depression is not a popular topic in the work place. Perhaps one of the
reasons we do not want to acknowledge it is because it seems so negative
and destructive. What Winston Churchill knew, and we must learn, is the
role of courage in our lives. He thought of it as “the ability to go from
failure to failure without losing enthusiasm.” This is a lesson we must
learn, too.
Ups and downs are part of everyday life, especially when one is passionately
engaged. To pretend that depression doesn’t exist is foolish. A work place
where we cannot take time to reflect on life during difficult times would not
be a healthy environment. Neither would it be a place of healing.
If I am depressed about the possibility of failing, I will acknowledge that now, take
courage, and charge ahead.
#d 85 D3
 Making Your Job Influential
and Meaningful
One of the hospital’s telephone operators who has worked the lines for
more than ten years, remarked how much she enjoyed her work. “People
think it’s dull, but it’s not. My voice creates the first impression people
have of the hospital. I like being that person. Besides, if I don’t come to
work, this place would almost shut down. Families couldn’t speak with
patients, doctors would miss calls, and frantic people couldn’t reach the
ED.” Even though there was a phone line between her and the callers, she
still felt a connection to each person.
She was insightful enough to recognize that while her role in the callers’
lives is fleeting, she has an influence. Martin Buber, the great Jewish
teacher, said that his hand used to tremble when opening the door of his
classroom. He was acutely aware that he could forever shape the minds of
those who listened. He was awed by the enormity of the responsibility.
The telephone operator’s job might seem to be far down the ladder of
importance when we think of our primary function of healing and caring
for patients, but she found a way to recognize the significance of her work.
This awareness has given her a greater sense of meaning and fulfillment in
her work and made her a valuable and decidedly influential presence.
I will see how everyone plays an important and unique role at work, and in the ulti-
mate healing that is taking place. I will see everyone’s job—and my own—with fresh
eyes, and appreciate the difference we are making in people’s lives.
#d 86 D3
B eing a Force forWhen
Healing
There Is No Cure
Something unusual happened yesterday in the chapel. A patient, knowing
that he would die shortly, wanted to marry his fiancée. So he and his bride
had their wedding in the hospital chapel. A priest witnessed the ceremony
and many from the patient’s care team attended. While we celebrated the
happy marriage, we prayed, both openly and silently, for his cure.
Everyone, none more than the physicians, hoped for it.
Yet last week, he died. The sadness of staff and friends was tangible. One
said, “We prayed so hard. He looked so good. It’s so discouraging.” His
wife brought photos of the wedding, which captured his smile and sense
of well-being. She and the staff remembered clearly how happy he was on
his wedding day.
Those present spoke of feeling his peacefulness. This man may not have
been cured, but he was healed. His wife attests to that. While our staff
could not cure his disease, he was indeed healed.
Our challenge every day is to be present in a way that heals. When we are,
ordinary conflicts and frustrations seem remarkably less important.
Sometimes we place too much attention on the technical side of medicine
and not enough on the human caring side. Each of us can enhance our
human caring side by bringing in an added dimension of selflessness
and generosity.
One story that comes to mind is of a woman who requested to be a foster
parent to children whom she knew had terminal illnesses. When she was
asked how she managed to take care of them without becoming depressed,
#d 87 D3

she said, “The way I look at it is that every life, whether it is long or short,
is a complete life. Each person is special. If someone lives to be seventy,
that’s his life. If he lives to be seven, that’s his life. I’m not concerned that
I’ll become depressed. I’m just trying to do what I can do.”
Today, I will look for ways to be more selfless and generous in my interactions
with others.
#d 88 D3
Keeping Perspective AboutWhy We’re Here
My wife and I were fortunate enough to take a long-anticipated vacation
trip to Italy. Shortly before boarding the plane, the gate attendant
announced that it was to be grounded because of weather conditions in
Chicago. Those going to Rome would have to be rerouted through
London, causing us to arrive four hours later than planned.
The man sitting across from me turned ballistic and even offensive. His
wife was so embarrassed that she hit him in the ribs with her elbow. The
force would have knocked a lighter man right off his chair. “Be quiet,”
she said. “If this was your father traveling to Europe by ship, it would have
taken him two weeks. If your great-grandfather were making this trip, he
would have sailed for months. You’ve lost your perspective and it’s going
to ruin your trip and mine!”
Amazingly, the man quieted down. His wife was in the same predicament
as he was, yet she was able to quickly step back and view the situation from
a broader perspective.
What happened to him can happen to any of us. It is easy to lose per-
spective when faced with a setback, especially within hospitals,
medical offices, and treatment centers where expectations are high, tasks
are demanding, and time is short. Disappointment and frustration can
quickly take control. There is a high price that comes with a lost per-
spective. Patients are not served well, we short-change our colleagues,
and performance suffers.
#d 89 D3

Patients think of hospitals as places to go when they’re sick. Others see
them as employment opportunities, and some as businesses. But none of
us can afford to lose sight of the bigger picture—that hospitals are places
where people care about others in highly specialized ways. Under stress,
the tiniest event may seem like it’s the end of the world. The challenge is
to find ways to remember that caring is what we are all about.
Today, I will remember why I chose my line of work and strive to keep things in
perspective. My work will thrive when I do.
#d 90 D3
Having an “Attitude”About Patient Safety
Usually, if someone says you’ve got an “attitude” about something, it’s not
a good thing. But when it comes to keeping patients safe while they’re
in our care, having an attitude about it and a commitment to reducing
medical errors is necessary.
Most of the time, we think of safety in terms of needle sticks, falls, or
mistaken medication or dosages. We have to eliminate these errors. The
National Patient Safety Goals include: Improve the accuracy of patient
identification; improve the effectiveness of communication; improve the
safety of prescribing medications; reduce the risk of health care-associat-
ed infections; accurately and completely reconcile medications across the
continuum of care; reduce the risk of patient falls; reduce the risk of
influenza and pneumococcal disease in institutionalized older adults.
It’s easy to end the discussion of safety with this list. While these action-
able points are critical to patient safety, the discussion is incomplete and
impossible to fully achieve without talking about something underlying
these acts that is even more difficult to achieve and measure: an attitude
of safety. What does this mean?
One way to look at safety-as-an-attitude is to think of a mother and her
child—especially those fate-tempting toddlers. A mother is always on the
alert with her child, carefully watching and anticipating all the injuries
that can befall him as he explores the playground, the street or the
neighborhood creek. Even during the night, a mother is attentive to her
#d 91 D3

child’s sounds. If she places him in the care of a babysitter or preschool,
she expects these caregivers to be equally responsible and vigilant. Care
drives her vigilance.
When patients come into our facilities, they, too, are expecting us to take
care of them with the same level of trust, vigilance and attentiveness.
Understandably, our first thought when it comes to patient safety has to
do with the immediate, physical actions we can take. And, if we see areas
where a patient’s care is in jeopardy, we must take the initiative and work
within our group to develop detailed policies, processes, and procedures.
But patient safety doesn’t end there. It begins with attitude. Having an
attitude of vigilance, we see things through a “safety” filter and become
aware of unsafe procedures that we might otherwise have missed.
Each of us is challenged to develop a culture of safety, not unlike a
mother’s. You may ask, “Aren’t you just adding one more thing on my
too-long list of things to do?”
If you were to ask that question of an overworked, overtired mother, what
do you think she would say? Probably, “Sorry, I don’t even want to go
there. It’s worth it to me to be safe regardless of the added effort it takes.”
And so it is with us. It is impractical not to approach all that we do with
an attitude of patient safety. This is at the heart of all that we do, of all
that we are about.
Today, I will be aware that the care and vigilance I have about my work will
contribute to a culture of safety in the work place. When I have the same vigilance
over my work as a mother has over her child, safety will naturally follow.
#d 92 D3
Work and Intimacy
On Valentine’s Day, we think of hearts. When hearts are mentioned,
health care professionals are likely to think of clinical outcomes or of a
service line rather than chocolates or flowers. Of course, when we return
to our children, spouses and loved ones, the sentiments associated with
the heart take on different meanings.
Beneath the popularization of this holiday lies a deeply embedded yearn-
ing within all of us to find others with whom we can share intimacy—
the human need to connect with others in a deep way. We can look back
on our most intimate moments as times when we understood someone
and his or her world deeply, and that person understood ours, in return.
We can think of intimacy as a meeting of hearts and minds. Anne Morrow
Lindberg writes of it as, “two solitudes touching.” It is an overlapping of
two beings that has nothing to do with physical contact.
Usually, we think of finding that closeness only with family and friends.
Yet, there is intimacy in the work place, too. Our professional training
cautions us to honor physical boundaries and adhere to strict codes of
conduct prohibiting behavior that may be intrusive and unwelcome.
Nevertheless, care givers have many opportunities to experience the deep
satisfaction that comes with intimacy.
When we’re at work, we do not kiss each other, send flowers, or ask to be
someone else’s Valentine. Yet, there are intimacies. Think of the shared
and often unspoken sentiments that arise when a nurse’s aide gives an
elderly woman a sponge bath. Watch an OB/GYN deliver a baby, or an
anesthesiologist gently reassure a frightened patient before surgery, or a
#d 93 D3

child life specialist organize the pediatric staff to sing Happy Birthday to a
5-year-old boy with leukemia. These moments are intimate as well as gifts.
Valentine’s Day is an opportunity to recognize anew the lingering dreams
and desires that led us to work as we do. We yearn to be close to others.
I will connect with others by looking for ways to be of service. I will not be afraid
to experience intimacy through the service I provide.
#d 94 D3
The Impact of One
Every hospital is blessed with gifted employees. In many medical centers,
as a result of efforts to acknowledge and reward employees, turnover has
dropped significantly. Recently, one of our most highly respected
employees left the organization. Some knew her only by her title, the Vice
President and Chief Operating Officer. The majority of employees and
physicians remember Colleen as an experienced, warm, gentle, humor-
ous, and caring nurse. While having administrative responsibilities, she
was always a “nurses’ nurse.” A number of us, even those who did not
know her well, thought of her as a friend. She had a way of awakening a
feeling of closeness in so many of us. With her leaving, we realized the
impact she had on all of us and on our organization.
While our jobs are difficult, why do so few leave? There are probably
many reasons. Job satisfaction is one. Another is the fact that almost
everyone enjoys being part of a highly motivated team that is doing
important work. Striving to provide the best clinical care and seeing a
documented increased satisfaction among patients certainly heightens
our satisfaction as physicians and employees. Perhaps another is the fact
that most employees appreciate their managers and colleagues. When we
feel respected, supported, and challenged, it is easy to come to work.
When individuals leave health care, they do so for many reasons.
Sometimes it is to get married; at other times, to study or stay at home with
their young children. Others are attracted to a new job opportunity.
Disconcertingly, some leave because they are dissatisfied with some aspect
of their job.
#d 95 D3

Colleen serves as an example of the impact we can have to inspire, lead
and awaken those around us. When our passions support our work lives,
our impact will be great and lasting.
What kind of example of my profession am I? I will think about how I can have a
positive, lasting impact on those around me and express my appreciation for those
who awaken my passion for my work.
Honoring the Call to Be the Best
One of the singers on the public television show, “The Irish Tenors” is a
physician. He struggled to decide whether to follow his desire to be a
practicing physician or to follow an equally strong, yet subtler pull, to be
a musician. When he thought of himself as a physician, he envisioned
being “average,” “successful,” “esteemed,” and “of help to others.” When
imagining himself as a professional musician, he thought of himself
as “selfish” (because he enjoyed singing so much!), yet he was more
“talented” in this field. He chose music. Perhaps, the music chose him.

Many of us struggle with being pulled in seemingly different directions.

The way we resolve (or avoid resolving) that pull has consequences. There
will always be a cost, whichever direction we decide to go, and often it
is high.

The problem is that most of us, in fear, pull back from moving in the
direction we are called. This may feel comfortable, but the cost is medi-
ocrity. Just like the experience of a musician misplaced as a physician.

What is true of individuals may be true for organizations. As we work to

create the organization we envision, let us also help one another live
reflectively in a seemingly mundane world with its hidden sacredness.

Today, I will choose to excel in all that I do. I will encourage my work place not to
settle, but to strive for its vision to excel in all that it does. I will push through my
fear and experience the joy of being the best I can be.

#d 96 D3 #d 97 D3
 Work Differently, Not More
We need to change our approach to work if we want our organization to
stay mission-focused. In health care, that means helping it become one
that delivers the best possible clinical care and service to patients. That
is the single most important tenet of any medical facility. Day in and day
out this vision should influence how we use time, what we do, and what
we do not do. This is a terribly important issue for a mission-driven
organization intent on constantly improving patient care.
Few of us can work harder than we already do, and even if we try to work
harder, it may not be healthy or sustainable. Imagine an airplane flying at
the highest speed for which it is designed. If the pilot pushes it still
further, the plane will rip apart under the strain. People are not much
different. Pushing one another to do more only increases our stress,
which leads to a loss of heart. Will that improve patient care? Not likely.
The challenge is to increase our capacity for achievement. Rather than
doing this by physically working harder, we need to review our organiza-
tion’s vision, understand how we can contribute to its achievement, and
direct all of our actions toward its accomplishment. We should question
any actions or work we do that does not support our organization’s vision.
Many of our organizations provide good quality clinical care. So how do
we take what we do to the next level? It starts with a highly competent, tal-
ented, skilled staff, people who also infuse their work with heart, soul and
passion to achieve the organization’s mission. Next, it has to be a vision
that is shared by everyone in the organization. By stating what this vision
is, taking personal responsibility for doing our part to fulfill it, and
engaging our hearts and souls in that effort, we lift our organization to
the next level (and gain a personal satisfaction with the accomplishment).
#d 98 D3
Let’s look at the power of holding a vision in our heart and mind to
achieve an end. Consider the story of Nelson Mandela. One of the things
that distinguished him from his fellow prisoners was his steadfast vision.
Nelson never wavered in his devotion to democracy, equality and learn-
ing. When he left prison after nearly thirty years, he is reported to have
said that his years in detention with little to do helped him avoid frenzied
activity after he was released. (Imagine trying to “catch up” after being
imprisoned for three decades. Where do you begin?)
How did Nelson Mandela organize and prioritize his actions after his
release? By embedding in his mind and heart the vision of his country-
men being freed, by prioritizing and selecting only those actions that lead
to the fulfillment of that vision. This foundation—the vision of what
could be—ordered everything. What did not fit the vision was simply
dropped. He didn’t work harder, he worked differently.
Think about the health care professionals in other parts of the world who
are working under extraordinary conditions—dirt floor huts, no electrici-
ty, minimally sanitary conditions, limited equipment and resources to do
the job and functioning with very little sleep or personal comforts for
weeks on end. All they have sometimes is the power of their own vision to
help—no matter how little they have to work with. They are hungry and
sleep-deprived and often work 12-hour shifts. A father might walk into the
camp one day, exhausted after journeying hundreds of miles over rugged
mountain trails. His sick boy is on the back of a donkey. These profes-
sionals can’t turn the child away because they themselves are tired, cold,
burned out or lack resources. How do they bolster themselves to treat this
little boy? They must dig down deep within themselves, tap into the
#d 99 D3

passion that brought them into health care in the first place, and go about
the business of tending to their tiny patient. Just like them, you can do
things you never thought you could do just because you have vision
and calling.
Practically speaking, given your situation and responsibilities, review your
organization’s vision and your role in helping to achieve it. Think about
what you have to do to increase your capacity for achievement without
falling into the trap of simply trying to work harder.
Today I will be mindful of my vision and my organization’s vision and I will tap into
the passion that has brought me to this place. I will assess every activity that
supports this vision and do it with heart.
#d 100 D3
The Power of Connecting with Colleagues
Before the physicians’ meeting this morning, uncharacteristically, they
paused for a few minutes of silence. The silence was followed by one of
the doctors mentioning that two hours before the meeting began, he was
in the mountains on his bike. It was his birthday. When looking out over
the horizon he was mindful that he was now the same age his father was
when he died. He paused while speaking and then added, “I like being on
a medical staff where we take time to think, I don’t mean about practice,
but about ourselves. There’s a warmth here that I appreciate.” When he
reflected on his own mortality, he saw the immense value of being able to
trust his colleagues enough to reveal an intimate, personal aspect of himself.
His words influenced the whole tone of the meeting. He awakened a sense of
commonality, as all of us could connect with what he was feeling once he took
the risk of revealing himself. It improved the quality of our whole day.
We are always in need of connecting with our coworkers. One way is to
take time now and again to reveal something about ourselves at work. We
may resist this because we don’t think we have time for such intimate
discussion; we may think it is inappropriate to reveal more of ourself in
a work setting. Some feel that it interferes with their ability to get things
done; others believe it diminishes how their colleagues view them profes-
sionally. But the truth is that none of these are the real challenge. The
real challenge is to override the discomfort we feel when we are exposed.
Can we afford not to?
Revealing more of myself may not be easy, but I will give it some consideration. How
will it feel to give others an opportunity to see another side of me? How will that
benefit me and add to my work experience?
#d 101 D3
 Working with an Attitude of Gratitude
When we think of our blessings, the gift of loved ones, both at home Individuals who live with grateful hearts don’t experience a deep void that
and at work, comes to mind. We are also grateful for everyone who has needs to be constantly filled by taking something from others. Instead,
positively influenced our lives—our parents, children, friends, teachers, they find it easy to give. That change of attitude influences how we relate
colleagues or neighbors. to others. Our patients will feel the difference. So will our colleagues.
So will we.
When we think about our work, though, gratitude may not come imme-
diately to mind. There are a lot of aspects of our work that we take for I will practice having an attitude of gratitude. I will take time to reflect on my
granted or that we simply don’t pay much attention to, so they escape blessings and see how this changes how I feel about my work, and my life.
our consideration when we think about what we are grateful for. And,
yet, a few moments of reflection can yield a long gratitude list.
Hopefully, you work with colleagues who are dedicated to the care of
others and you recognize the incredibly important mission of the work
you do. Most employees recognize the quality of clinical care you
deliver and would strongly recommend your facilities to family, friends
and neighbors, not only as a place to receive quality care, but also as a
place to work. Your organization may not be perfect, but it is intent on
becoming the best.

In the midst of the demands of everyday life and the stresses of the work
place, recognizing our blessings and developing a grateful heart might
not seem important. To glimpse its value, simply find a moment to be
quiet, recall your blessings, and then return to the work at hand. As
Mother Teresa of Calcutta so beautifully stated, “I slept and I dreamed
that life is all joy, I woke and I saw that life is all service. I served and I
saw that service is joy.” Simply reflecting on her words can create the
dramatic shift in our perspective that we so desperately crave at certain
points in our work day.

#d 102 D3 #d 103 D3
 Embracing Feedback
As managers, department heads or team leaders, there is a risk in sharing
our goals for our organization with others. In doing so, we are publicly
setting a high standard for the whole group for which we will be held
accountable, and it can be disillusioning to get survey feedback that we
didn’t measure up to our own standards.
Surveys may confront us with an unpleasant reality—that patients are not
satisfied with how they are being treated. They feel they were rushed, that
mistakes were made, that their concerns weren’t heard, that overall they
weren’t treated as individuals. It is embarrassing to acknowledge and even
more discomforting to accept the idea that as much as we hold the desire
to be caring and helpful, the incessant demands of the moment force us
to drop our most important goal—the thoughtful, careful treatment of
patients. One survey done at my own hospital showed that a surprising
number of patients indicated that they did not receive “polite and
professional” treatment. And yet this is precisely what we want to do.
The same principle applies when we interact with one another as
colleagues. We need to be as sensitive to one another as those nurses were
trying to be to their patients. If you think about how much a simple kind
human gesture can mean to you, imagine how much it means to a patient
who can barely take his next breath, who is in pain, or who is facing his
own mortality.
Finding ways to be polite and professional with patients, their families, as
well as with one another, is an important stepping stone to becoming the
best at what we do. If you have discovered ways to create that attitude where
you work—and if you believe that these will help others—pass your ideas
on to them.
Today, I will embrace feedback as a great learning tool for improving the way I do
my job. Using this information, I will creatively come up with a solution for better
serving my patients and coworkers.

What do you do when you are not pleased with the results of a survey?
How do you take responsibility rather than merely harboring anger
and disappointment?

You face it head on. One group of nurses in this hospital was so
determined to change their patients’ experience that they developed a
campaign entitled “It’s your mama in that bed.” The phrase reminded
them to treat everyone with particular sensitivity and as a whole person.
In other words, they didn’t just treat the condition.

#d 104 D3 #d 105 D3
 Earning Trust
Yesterday, I heard the highly respected Chief Financial Officer of a health
care system known for its quality of care, tell a hundred of its leaders why
he no longer trusts today’s health care system. That statement got my
attention! How could someone so knowledgeable of the inner workings of
health care say such a thing? Because he knows that the pressure in today’s
health market to make medical institutions responsive to shareholder
expectations often collides with, and sharply interferes with its primary
purpose of creating an environment where healing takes place.
Sometimes profit trumps people.
Patients know that hospitals are not run as charities. And, they know that
paying the bill just comes with the territory—it’s the price of receiving the
latest technology and treatment from highly skilled, trained professionals.
Nevertheless, they have to inherently trust that in spite of the money
factor, our real motivation is the job, not the paycheck. They hope we care
about what happens to them and that we’ll go the extra mile to make sure
that they are safe, comfortable, and nurtured back to health.
There are different levels of trust. In a family, it looks like one thing.
“Tom,” the CFO, said he was fortunate because, in his family, “we trust
one another, and we know how to access medical care when we need it.”
Four of his siblings are physicians and share a common knowledge.
Whenever someone in his family needs medical care, they all huddle
before deciding on the next step. There is an implicit understanding that
everyone holds the well being of their patient/family member in the high-
est regard. In our capacity as health care professionals, we need to be
doing the same thing.
#d 106 D3
Our hospitals, treatment centers and offices might not be our families,
yet, all health care is based on trusting that we put the patient first. The
question we must ask ourselves is, “What do we have to do to earn our
patients’ trust?” People often think there is a complex, almost mystical
answer to this, but actually, the answer is quite simple. We do it one task
at a time. We accomplish it through all the small things we do every day to
meet patients’ needs. Every time we relieve a patient’s suffering, bring her
medication on time and respond promptly to his call button, trust grows
a little more.
There are many, seemingly small things we can do that have great
consequence. They require being doggedly attentive to the task at hand,
whatever the job might be.
• If a lab technician, we can check and double-check our results.
• If a nurse, we can be single-minded about the accuracy of taking orders.
• If a physician, we can take the time to become uncanny listeners with
sharpened observational skills. Many a complex diagnosis is decoded by
listening “between the lines” to what our patient is telling us.
• If working within nutritional services, we can make sure that what we
serve is what has been requested.
• If working within the business office, we can resolve billing issues in a
timely and pleasant way.
• If an office assistant, we can make the extra effort to keep our
department organized and on track.
• If a respiratory therapist, we can be sure we arrive on time to a patient’s
bedside and that our treatment is well documented in the chart.
• If an electrician, we can respond quickly to a call for help and solve the
problem that could make a huge difference in the medical staff’s day.
#d 107 D3

Why is all this important? Because, the caregiver who directly interacts
with the patient can only be as good as those who work behind the scenes
to support her activities. And, when the caregiver is careless and
detached, the patient senses it. He learns to distrust all of us through this
one act of callousness. Every one of our jobs is important and valued
because if we do not pull together as an organization, we fail our patients.
Some may speak of hospitals as businesses, yet they are also places where
people genuinely care about people in very specialized ways. The way we
build trust—one act at a time—will profoundly impact our effectiveness as
a business and as a place of healing.
What can I do today to improve the care that patients receive? Today, I will look
for ways to earn the trust of others by consistently delivering the highest quality
of work.
#d 108 D3
Courage to Speak
I had the good fortune to volunteer behind the information table for a
few hours yesterday afternoon. I thought that I was there to provide
information, but I ended up receiving more than I gave.
The table is next to the hospital’s front door, which is used by many
patients after they are discharged. To provide easy entrance for others,
patients in wheelchairs leaving the hospital sometimes wait directly in
front of the table, which displays pictures and books dealing with loss and
death, describing them as a normal part of living. It was noticeable how
the patients sitting there would take a quick glance at the display and then
look the other way.
One day, the eye of a patient caught mine. She smiled and I went over to
say hello. “You know,” she said, “I’ve noticed how people look away from
the table. Most of us find it hard to speak about important things.
Death is one of those things. We think we have to wait for the right time
to say something. The fact is, there is never a right time. Now that I have
cancer, I have learned not to wait to have a conversation. Real conversa-
tions begin when one person has the courage to speak.”
Her words rung in my ears, “Real conversations only begin when one
person has the courage to speak.” We can learn a lot from our patients.
Death is a primary example of something we find hard to talk about, but
in our every day work life, other topics that are in the air can be every
bit as difficult, yet important, to speak up about. It is quite hard, for
example, for patients to express their dissatisfaction to the staff because
#d 109 D3

of a fear of “biting the hand that feeds them.” So when they do open up
enough to complain, we can listen.
We are inescapably interdependent on one another. When a patient feels
unsafe or dissatisfied, it is everyone’s responsibility to change the way the
system works. No one can say, “It is their problem, not mine.” Things
will only change when one person has the courage to speak.
Don’t let a potential conflict with a colleague stop you. Think of it as an
opportunity for a real conversation—one that will only happen if you push
through your resistance and bring the subject up.
Today, I will have the courage to speak up.
#d 110 D3
Awakening to Our Lives
Both my mother and father died of heart failure. My siblings all seem to
have inherited the same congenital heart problems. My older brother had
a heart attack when he was fifty-seven years old, my younger brother had
stents inserted when he was fifty-six, and my older sister had heart failure
while skiing at Vail and has since had a valve replaced. Another sister
had a stroke. I am the only one in my immediate family without known
serious cardiac problems. That is unsettling because it reawakens my
awareness of the finiteness of life.
When I was leaving the parking lot of a hospital one day, heading for a
meeting in another, I drove out of a darkened underground garage. As
soon as the automatic door opened, I was struck by the incredible beauty
of the blue sky. The contrast was remarkable. Soon, I felt the welcome
chill in the morning air and noticed children playing on the side of the
road. I relished what I was observing. There is something about serious
illness and being faced with our own vulnerability that puts things in
perspective. We are awakened to the world.
The challenge in health care is to recognize the beauty and value of our
work that is often masked by the ordinariness of everyday activities.
We often think of work as a task, yet it is also about awakening. When we
are awakened, we work a little differently. Patients know the difference.
Let us help one another live reflectively.
I will live my life today with a greater sense of awareness and appreciation of my life,
my work and the people around me. I will strive to approach my life and work with
more reflection. I will look at the beauty of life and creation and awaken to the gifts
that surround me.
#d 111 D3
 R emembering to Pause
We were indoors yesterday, busy in operating rooms, on floors, and
at desks in windowless offices. Many cared for patients; many more
worked in support of those who do. It is understandable that we may have
forgotten that it was the first day of autumn.
Though busy, and as important as work is, it is also valuable to pause, if
only for a moment, to remember our lives apart from work. As we stop
and reflect, our thoughts will likely turn to our loved ones: children,
parents, and friends. These moments are not a distraction. They are an
invitation to see with fresh and appreciative eyes our loved ones, the
beauty of this season, and most importantly, the beauty of those we serve.
They are a reminder that we are participating in the mystery of life that
always eludes pat answers and trouble-free explanations.
When we return to our homes, let’s take a moment to recognize once
again the love of our friends and the value of our work.
Today, I will take a break from work to reflect on events going on outside of my life,
and be grateful for the friends and loved ones in my life. I will return to work with
renewed energy and the desire to do my best.
#d 112 D3
Controlling the Future
On Groundhog Day, we learn whether Puxatawny Phil sees his shadow or
not when he emerges from his winter home in the hills of Pennsylvania.
Is winter over yet?
Groundhog Day is a metaphor for the ways in which we look for hints
about how the future will unfold. Who has not wondered about the rest
of their child’s life or the length of one’s days? Of course, no one has
total control of the future. Wars, earthquakes, accidents, and unexpected
illnesses are proof enough. It is the wise person, then, who lives every
moment with an attitude of gratitude.
The best way to predict the future is to shape it by what we do today. We
all have a vision of what we want to happen. If you make it your goal to
strive for excellence, to be part of an organization that excels in care, and
to be of service to your patients, to become the best—and you work toward
that goal daily—then you will be preparing for it to occur. Today’s actions
create the future.
Every person in the organization is involved in this process. While our
responsibilities may vary, what we do, or do not do as individuals and as
teams, shape patient care.
Think about how much greater the impact on our organizations will be if
we model this behavior as a team, and if everyone on the team works
together daily to accomplish the same goal. If that common vision is to
work as a team—or a collection of teams—to provide the best patient care,
medical errors will drop, patient satisfaction will increase, and the
#d 113 D3

delivery of high-quality patient care will be assured. Looking at it from
this perspective, we can see that together, we have a much better chance of
predicting the future than Puxatawny Phil.
The actions I take today will influence the future. While I cannot predict this
outcome, I can control what I do by being aware of my actions and doing my best.
#d 114 D3
Making a Resolution to Believe in Change
As we close out one year and begin a new one, most of us make New Year’s
resolutions. Some of us resolve to spend more time with our families or
to change the way we work. We may resolve to eat healthier or to exercise
more regularly. Whatever the re-solution, it is generally associated with
re-solving a recurring problem.
Some no longer make New Year’s resolutions. Remembering how inef-
fectual our past efforts were, we have become a little jaded. But don’t just
assume you should resign yourself to the status quo just because your
attempts to change didn’t work. Even if in the past, you tried and tried
and nothing changed, or you were unable to fix your wayward behavior,
it is not because change is impossible. Upon closer examination, you may
find that some change did take place, just not to the degree you had
hoped. Change, especially when it requires a huge shift in values, actions
or long-held attitudes, occurs in baby steps; sometimes they’re so
small that they are hardly noticeable at first. Or, maybe your initial
expectations were too high, but if you reflect more closely on your efforts,
you’ll see that you’ve made real progress toward your goal. Did you write
off the whole endeavor because you were successful for a while, but then
back-pedaled or stalled out? Did you set a goal that required someone or
something to change that was outside of your control?
Whatever conclusion you come to after looking at past disappointments,
don’t let those setbacks keep you from trying. Why? Because the alterna-
tive is to become stuck in your life and accepting of what you’ve already
determined is unacceptable. Once we begin to believe that it is useless to
try to change, we atrophy.
#d 115 D3

If even a small part of you is still open to inspiration and the idea that
change is possible, then you can’t give up on yourself or on the world,
which will benefit from your growth and accomplishment. Rather than
giving up altogether, look back on where you fell short and why. It may be
because of a simple reason, or it may be that this change couldn’t have
worked last year, but could work this year.
What happens to individuals can also happen to groups. When organiza-
tions become jaded, employees disengage and grow helpless because they
believe the future will just be an extension of the past. They lose their
incentive to change and blame others for the team’s failures.
Accountability goes out the window, virtually guaranteeing a downward
slide and a miserable environment for everyone.
Change starts with a desire within ourselves. We don’t need to wait until
New Year’s to make a resolution. We can resolve to take a new step toward
changing a behavior every day. We can start over in the middle of a day.
We can always choose to begin again.
Today, I will make a small change in my personal or work life. I will follow through
with that change each day and be a powerful force for change in my work place.
#d 116 D3
Giving the Gift of Life
Many of us who are in health care contribute to the field in ways that
extend beyond any paycheck or job description. Everyone who donates
blood helps people they will never meet, but who will be eternally
grateful for their life-saving gift. I know of one employee, Dan, who
has participated in the blood donor program 150 times! The platelets
he donates each month are valued at several hundred dollars per unit,
yet he receives no money at all for it; he does it because he knows how
important it is. The total monetary value of his contribution to patients
is estimated to be over $100,000 dollars. Can you imagine the lives
saved and number of successful surgeries enhanced by his generosity?
In my mind, this kind of selfless act makes Dan a saint, yet he remains
in the background. The world is a better place because of him.
Many employees in health care make this important pilgrimage each
month; some have donated platelets or plasma over a hundred times. Even
retired employees return to donate. It takes about an hour to give plasma,
about two for platelets, and the value far outweighs the inconvenience.
Everyday, we walk around with this amazing gift that our bodies produce
continuously. What better way to express gratitude for our own health
than by sharing this “liquid gold” with others.
Can I find time to donate blood? I will look for ways to enrich my life by helping others.
#d 117 D3
 How We Work, Not What We Do
Over the holidays one of our employees, Janet, died unexpectedly. She
was only in her early thirties, a wife and mother of two, and worked in
Accounts Payable. She was a warm, vibrant, and engaged woman. It’s not
uncommon for employees in Accounts Payable to have contact with the
rest of us only by phone. Outside of Janet’s own department, no one
really knew her, except by her pleasant voice. Most of us hadn’t even met
her face-to-face. Yet, at the service, person after person stood up to
speak about their cherished relationship with this woman. I couldn’t
help thinking, “How can so many different individuals with such varied
backgrounds feel that they had a special relationship with a woman they
hadn’t actually met?” As one person remarked, even the neighborhood
dogs found their way to her home! Why? Because of her warm and
magnetic personality.
Every one of us brings more than just competence to our work. What
makes each of us memorable to those around us is our very presence.
Janet’s life was a gift to us, and a reminder that how we do our job is
just as important as the job we do. When Janet answered the phone or
greeted someone, we walked away feeling seen, heard and cared about.
When you die, how will you be remembered? Others will think of us
not so much by what we did or said, but by how we made them feel about
themselves. Let us return to our work renewed and motivated by this
heightened perspective to treat others in a deeper, more meaningful
way with every phone call we make, every email we send, each hand we
shake, and every shoulder we touch.
I will take time today to reflect on the legacy I am creating. I can shape that legacy
through every day interactions at work and at home.
#d 118 D3
Through the Eyes of a Child
There was a lot of buzz about the upcoming employee picnic at the zoo.
On the day before the picnic, I was standing next to an employee waiting
for a meeting to begin, and I asked her, “Are you going to the zoo
tomorrow?” ”I am,” she said, “but I’m disappointed. I wanted to take my
niece. She’s six years old and has never been to a zoo. A few days ago
she fell and bruised herself badly and can’t walk very well. I’ll miss her
excitement, particularly because she would be seeing so many things for
the first time.”
Her words about missing the thrill of going with a child stayed with me
during the entire time I was at the zoo. Perhaps because I was alone so I
wasn’t drawn into adult conversations, my attention kept being pulled
toward the kids and at how excited they really were to see the animals. Their
curiosity was undeniable. I watched a particularly determined little girl
convince her mother that it was okay to touch the animals in the petting
area. The pleasure she found in stroking the lambs was unquestionable.
Why is it more fun to go to the zoo with children? Is it because their
enthusiasm, curiosity and excitement are contagious? Is it because, as
adults, that side of ourselves, which we often overlook, is awakened again
by their antics?
All of us have a childlike wonder and curiosity buried within. Some of us
have kept our carefree, spirited selves under layers of a self-imposed sense
of duty and seriousness, believing that there is no place for light-hearted
“unproductive” activities. This group feels that those childish ways and
days are behind them and the life of a responsible adult has no room for
#d 119 D3
play or taking off on a lark. Others are able to more effortlessly liberate
this childlike enthusiasm and excitement by engaging in activities that
they loved as children, be it flying a kite, playing a pick-up game of
basketball, singing in a choir or getting their hands dirty in a moist lump
of modeling clay. Then there are those who, while holding down serious
jobs or having earned great credibility and respect in their communities,
seem to balance that with an easy sense of joy and wonder at the simple
events that take place in daily life. They revel at sunrises, take in the full
aroma of a freshly brewed cup of coffee, and can’t wait to play an
impromptu game of catch with a neighbor’s dog and a found tennis ball.
This group of people seems to squeeze every moment out of life, making
each day a pleasure and thus becoming a magnet, drawing in those around
them who hope that some of this magic will rub off.
Do you think clinical outcomes can be affected if a physician sees his
patients as if for the first time? Do you think that we feel differently
when others look at us in fresh ways? The real question is can we,
whatever our professions or responsibilities, be mature enough to let
children teach us?
Today, I will approach my work with wonder and newness by embracing first-
time experiences. I will look for a new way of doing my job and bring a sense of
excitement and joy into my work.

All of us have the capacity to tap into the childlike wonder that resides
within us. When we grow comfortable with being curious and enthusiastic
at work, we not only feel better, but we become more engaged and better
healers. We become far more innovative in dealing with ambiguity. More
than likely, others find it easier to be with us, too. Care is enhanced when
we have a simplicity that sees the world as if for the first time.

We, like children, are seeing things for the first time all the time.
Whenever a physician or nurse meets a new patient, they are seeing
someone for the first time. Every time we see an unfamiliar employee
walking towards us in the hallway, or sitting beside us at a meeting, we are
having a first-time experience.

#d 120 D3 #d 121 D3
 Transforming Failure
We often think of failure as something that we should avoid at all costs.
Do you think this is a helpful way to think? Consider these two examples.
Thomas Edison once said he was grateful for the thousand failed
experiments that led to his discovery of how to make the first light bulb.
Not once did he view them as unnecessary or a waste of his time.
A master martial arts teacher tells his students that they cannot learn if
they always win. Why? Because failure prompts closer examination of the
problem, it spurs them to make a greater effort to win the next time, and
it inspires innovation, which will lead to an even better performance in
the future. The trick is to not become stuck in the failure, endlessly
berating oneself for the mistakes. Mistakes are not outside the process;
they are part of the process.
How does this principle of failure relate to those of us who are working
at the bedside of patients, running tests in windowless labs, reading
films, filling prescriptions, preparing meals or doing detail work in
out-of-the-way cubicles? We can only become the best at what do if we
appreciate failure and realize that it is essential to any success.
Failure is a part of life. How we deal with it separates the cautious from
the creative, as individuals, teams, and organizations.
Today, I will be more committed to learning and growing professionally and
personally through the exposure and examination of my failures. New ideas will
result from this courageous approach.
#d 122 D3
Fighting Prejudice Through Self-Reflection
The late Coretta Scott King started out as a support for her husband,
then became a force in her own right. She used her life to speak out
resolutely about the need to love one another—regardless of ethnicity,
religion or social standing. She told us how she herself kept this vision of
love, in spite of her husband’s violent death, which was brought about by
racism. She accomplished this by having “…a commitment to rigorous
self-analysis and self-criticism about the way we treat people.” In her
opinion, self-assessment inevitably leads to facing and naming our
prejudice. The light of awareness alone often leads to prejudice
dissolving because under close scrutiny, we realize that what we have in
common is our fundamental humanity. We can almost envision a society
in which everyone is valued. The problem, she thought, was that we were
hesitant to look at ourselves and our ways honestly.
Coretta King’s death is one more invitation to take a critical look at
ourselves and discern the obstacles that keep us from seeing that we are all
part of the human family. While she believed that individuals and groups
were hesitant to do such probing, I suspect that we in health care are less
timid. I have watched teams, departments and organizations work just as
hard to save a homeless person as they would an heiress.
A test of our resolve to rid ourselves of prejudice and inequity is as close
as the next moment we answer a phone or touch a patient or pass a
stranger in the hallway. We can make this connection even with a perfect
stranger if we approach him with heartfelt attention and caring. How was
Coretta King able to show such warmth to the people she didn’t know?
#d 123 D3
 Keeping Life from Getting in the Way
She took the inward trip and looked at herself honestly. What she saw “Are you going to the hospital’s Christmas dinner this year?”
was that others are in need of love as much as she. There is something “I was going to, but now I can’t afford to take the time. And if I do show
heroic in that discovery. up, I probably can’t stay. I’ve got too much to do.”

Today, I will look honestly at my prejudices and biases. I will look beyond
appearances today to the connection that everyone is yearning to feel from
one another.
I overheard that conversation the week before Christmas. The irony is
that during these gatherings, we have the opportunity to socialize with our
coworkers in a more personal way. These times are just as important as
the time we spend working with them. Christmas parties are anything but
frivolous; they build trust. So when you do find yourself in the operating
room with that colleague the next day—the person you just shared an
eggnog with the night before—the intuitive understanding you’ve built is
working for you.

“I’ve been trying to reach you for days. I only need about five minutes.”
“I’m swamped, let’s set something up.”

How often have we heard this kind of exchange?

When we are busy, it is easy to lose focus, become scattered, and

consequently ineffective. Task-driven thinking will lead us to believe
that someone asking us a question or going to a Christmas party are
“distractions” and “interruptions.” In fact, these are as integral to our
work as the next item on our to-do list. Almost all of us have learned,
yet forget, Alfred D’Souza’s self-reflection:

For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin—real life. But there was always
some obstacle in the way, something to be got through first, some unfinished business, time
still to be served, a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these
obstacles were my life.
#d 124 D3 #d 125 D3

We are the ones who think of new requests, unexpected telephone calls,
uninvited emails, and unscheduled meetings as interruptions rather than
the stuff of life. The poet Blake reminds us that the tree that moves some
to tears of joy is, in the eyes of others, a green thing that stands in their
way of where they want to go!
Today, I will embrace unexpected events and be open to their blessing and
opportunity, rather than see them as obstacles. I will see the unexpected as a gift
and not let my life pass me by.
#d 126 D3
Managing Fear
The world, including our nation, has endured an incredible loss of life
through the actions of terrorists. The unique hallmark of terrorism is
that no one knows if, when or how violence will strike. That is what makes
these times so frightening.
We know that when we walk through the doors at work, we must set aside
many of the personal concerns that will interfere with our ability to be
attentive to our patients.
Overly cautious and suspicious individuals do not make helpful caregivers.
We need to show unconditional compassion for everyone. The challenge
for all of us at this time in history is to recognize our insecurities,
dampen our suspicions, and go beyond our immediate urge to be on
guard, by reaching out with warmth and care.
Within health care, we pledge to foster the healing and health of those
entrusted to us. That is our mission. It is not a vague, amorphous task. It
is a practical attitude that can be applied every single day.
Today, I will set aside my vague fears of mistrust and uncertainty. I will focus on
the very real task at hand of being a healing presence to those who come into my
life today.
#d 127 D3
 Creating Ceremonies
An employee asked if I would preside at her wedding. I laughed at what
seemed an unusual request. “Of course not! I’m not a rabbi, priest,
deacon, pastor or civil servant. I can’t do that!” She was pleasantly
assertive. “Sure you can. In this state, all you need is a lawyer and a
license. We have that. We just want a meaningful ceremony for ourselves,
loved ones, and friends.” I sat on the decision for a time before saying
okay. While this type of role is way outside of my comfort zone, I am glad
that I agreed to do it.
The two wanted a public ceremony, one that was significant for them, and
that would formally usher them into their new life together with the
endorsement and support of family and friends. They knew there would
be joyous as well as dark times ahead, and making their commitment
public was a way of gaining support for whatever the future held.
Try to recall a past ceremony that was particularly meaningful. Once
you remember one, think about the how it changed you or those who
participated. With thoughtful reflection, you will see their value in
changing people from the inside out, and in turn changing the culture
where we work, from the inside out.
Today, I will think about the role that ceremonies have played in unifying my
personal community at key moments in my life. How have those events helped
during dark times? How can I add ceremonies that will deepen my team’s
commitment to one another and to our work?

My involvement in their wedding prompted me to ask myself what role

ceremony plays in our work lives. Just as in our personal lives, in health
care, we have joyous as well as challenging times ahead. We also share our
many hours at work with our coworkers—not in as intimate a way as this
couple, but we are similarly engaged in a shared commitment to provide
the best possible clinical care and service. Are there ceremonies that
we can create in our work setting that help us stay together when we want
to give up?

Why are ceremonies important? Because they touch a side of life that
words alone will never reach. Think of it this way. For those in love, there
is a time for words; there is another time for a kiss upon awakening. To
forget about the role of ceremony in our lives is to live narrowly.

#d 128 D3 #d 129 D3
S lowing Down and Thinking
About All We Have
While no work place is perfect, many of us are blessed to have valuable
Today, let’s take some time to think about how we work. For many of us, jobs and pleasant working conditions. It only takes a moment to recog-
taking time to reflect—even for a few minutes—feels like a luxury we just nize that most of the things we complain about are small compared to
can’t afford. It’s easy to walk through the doors at work and get swept up our blessings.
in the demands coming at us from all sides, almost simultaneously. And
yet, taking time for reflection before or even during our work day can I will slow down and take time to reflect on all of the gifts in my life. I will carry this
create a vital shift in our attitude, open us to unexpected answers to attitude into all that I do and see how opportunities arise that enrich my experience
nagging problems, inspire a new approach to treating a patient or and the lives of those I meet.
coworker—in other words, enliven our work lives with a renewed energy
and even generosity of spirit. The health benefits of reflection or
meditation are widely known: lowered blood pressure, improved heart
rate and the other positive physical effects that we feel when we take steps
to lower our stress. It’s worthwhile and practical to give ourselves the gift
of time. One place to start is to cultivate an attitude of gratitude.

Each day we have a chance to recognize our blessings. Is your stomach

full? Do you live in a real home? Are you free to pursue your own kind
of happiness? For those who have grown up with these gifts, it is so easy
to take them for granted. But it’s important to realize that millions of
people across the globe do not have these basics. When we feel grateful,
we want to share our good fortune with others. In the East, they have a
saying: giving something away “creates an empty space” for something new
to come into your life. When we carry the awareness of abundance into
our work, we will see occasions to express gratitude all around us. The
opportunity is as immediate as the stranger walking toward us, the patient
in the next room, or our colleague in the neighboring cubicle.

#d 130 D3 #d 131 D3
 Standing in a Moment of Opportunity
On Inauguration Day our President places his right hand on a Bible,
raises his hand in a gesture to express the solemn nature of what he is
about to do, and then voices an oath, not simply a promise.
Inauguration Day is “gap-like” time. As a community, we stand in a
moment between what was, is, and what will be. Today, something new is
beginning. The future holds the secret of what that will be.
You and I provide health care to those in need. We will not be elected
President and we will never know the consequences of taking the Oath of
Office. However, every time we meet a patient, speak to their families,
prepare their medications, clean rooms, ready meals, order supplies,
review charts, check bills or work on spreadsheets, we stand in a moment
of opportunity.
How we do what we do will shape the future. In some ways, our opportu-
nities to fashion this sacred world are no less frequent than those of
our President.
I will take a moment to be quiet in the midst of this workday. I will realize the power
I have to shape my day.
#d 132 D3
Applying New Ideas to Our Work
When people go away for conferences, they often return excited and
re-energized because they’ve been exposed to a great many ideas that
enlightened and inspired them. Have you ever returned from a
conference only to realize that others are not as moved as you are when
you relate your experience? Then you think, “Of course not, they’re
getting it second-hand. Besides, how could I or anyone reduce those
hours of learning into a ten-minute conversation?”
There is an oft-quoted phrase within Rabbinic, Muslim and Christian
traditions: “Preach always. Use words if you must.” What this means
is that the words, themselves, no matter how well executed, are not as
formative as the whole experience. It’s how we apply what we’ve learned
that will demonstrate the value of what we learned from any conference
or training.
When we are at work, it is helpful to remember that how we work speaks to
others in remarkably powerful ways.
Today, I will look for ways to apply what I’ve learned at conferences to my everyday
work. I’m grateful to have had this training and I will express my gratitude in the new
way I approach my work.
#d 133 D3
 Grief as Teacher
Grief often teaches us how to live. A colleague mentioned to me that
when her dog died, her daughter was distraught. The night before he
died, the daughter had yelled at him to get out of the kitchen and stop
bothering her. "If I knew he was ill and was going to die, I would never
have yelled." That is another way of saying that she would have lived a
little differently had she realized that he was going to die.
From personal experience, I will never forget the look on my mother’s
face when I walked out of her hospital room for the last time. My sisters
and I were leaving to catch a bite to eat, but while we were gone she slipped
into a coma. The following morning she died. If I had known, I would
have stayed and expressed my love for the last time.
These examples may seem sentimental. They are not. They are simply
every day examples of the way in which awareness of the fragile nature
of life invites us to live a little differently, live with a more immediate
recognition that life’s continuity is far from guaranteed and its direction
can change course in a flash.
For some people, it takes a death to jolt them out of their complacency
that life will go on no matter what. Whatever strengthens our apprecia-
tion of life—including grief—will help us treat our patients and colleagues
in increasingly sensitive ways.
Today, I will be aware of how fragile life is. I will use this awareness of the fragility
of life to help me make good choices in my interactions with others.
#d 134 D3
Needing to Connect
Reflect on what many individuals did when they were trapped on the
upper floors of the burning World Trade Center. Passengers on the
hijacked airliner did the same. So did those running from collapsing
buildings when they reached a doorway or safe spot. They called home.
Today, answering machines preserve their recorded calls. “I don’t know
what’s happening. I’m scared. Know that I love you.” Those recordings
are now saved and kept in safe places in an effort to hold onto the last
cherished words of loved ones.
Buried within our hearts, less deeply than we might imagine, is a profound
need to be connected and to express our love.
When entering a hospital or when preoccupied with an unknown or
feared condition, patients have sentiments similar to those expressed on
9/11. In the face of death, it’s not their account balance they want to see,
it’s the faces of those they love.
I will remember the voices of 9/11 and how they instinctively needed to connect with
loved ones when I think of the patients I may meet today.
#d 135 D3
 Having Good Humor
Yesterday, I was speaking with an employee who, for thirty years, worked of “good” humored individuals as those who are optimistic, positive
in the hospital’s food services department. She had recently suffered a and cheerful. An “ill” humored person is one who cannot tolerate
heartbreaking experience and she wanted to talk to me about it. Her misfortune without being thrown off base. This employee certainly fell
daughter and her 7-year-old granddaughter had been struck by a car in the former category.
while crossing the street. The daughter had internal injuries that left her
out of work for six months, and her granddaughter suffered serious A good-humored staff, whether the attitude comes naturally or whether
spinal cord injuries resulting in a paralysis of her legs. This vibrant, they have to work for it, helps to create a healing climate for patients. But,
happy, and energetic soccer player would no longer be able to walk. The there is a challenge. We don’t always wake up with good humor. Even if we
employee described the stress and strain this had placed on the entire do, we can lose it in the midst of the day’s activities. Neither our patients
family as they coped with the little girl’s tragedy and the financial burden nor our colleagues deserve our bad humor. So, as odd as it seems, we
of a lost income from the mother. must learn to “pretend” in an honest way. This kind of pretense is not
false; it is a manifestation of the respect we have toward others. Being able
After bearing her soul in the most touching way, she stopped, and with to put our feelings behind us is a mark of maturity.
tears still on her cheeks, she smiled, tipped her head upward, and said,
“I’m blessed.” I knew what this meant. In spite of her devastating experi- Today, I will bring a positive, open attitude to my work. When I’m feeling down, I’ll
ence, she still managed to be grateful for all the good things she still had take a moment apart to regain perspective. I’m here for others.
in her life. I have no idea how she had developed this disposition during
a life that was touched by recurring and significant pain, but she did.
When she left my office, I had the lingering feeling that I had just met a
thoroughly genuine and resilient person with an appreciative attitude
toward life. Some of us are graced with a buoyancy that lets us weather
life’s ups and downs with an optimistic attitude, which, in ancient times
used to be referred to as “good humors.”

The ancients believed that the nature of “humors” within us gave us our
temperaments. For instance, one blend of humors gave individuals a
sanguine (upbeat) temperament; other mixtures made individuals have
phlegmatic (calm) or choleric (excitable) temperaments. Today, we think

#d 136 D3 #d 137 D3
Embracing Diversity During the Holidays
The holiday season represents a unique time of year when many of us Holidays remind us of the need to acknowledge the sacredness of life and
publicly display and express our religious beliefs. During the rest of the allow this awareness to influence how we live and work.
year, we often keep these beliefs to ourselves and practice our traditions
within our religious communities. There is something about the Today, I will embrace our differences and not be afraid of them. I will learn more
shortened days of winter and the traditions associated with the winter about other traditions and discover our similarities while honoring our differences.
holidays—decorating our homes with festive lights and exchanging gifts—
that makes this public expression and celebration of our moral and
religious values uniquely acceptable this time of year.

Remarkably, many of the world’s greatest religions and traditions

celebrate their important day at the same time of the year. Christians
celebrate Christmas, Chanukah begins for the Jewish people and
African Americans celebrate Kwanzaa.

Christians think of this holiday as the season in which they rejoice in

their belief that God has entered this world. They consider this creation
as sacred.

Chanukah is the time when Jews remember celebrating the victory over
religious oppression to finally practice their religion as they chose. The
miracle of a flame lasting eight days when there was only enough oil to
light the lamp for one day, confirmed their belief that G-d was with
them, despite continued persecution through the centuries.

When African Americans celebrate Kwanzaa, they reaffirm their rich

and varied cultures, as well as their memory and indebtedness to their
ancestors, who paid an incredible price for freedom.

#d 138 D3 #d 139 D3
 Losing Perspective from Overwork
Our jobs have an intensity about them! To keep balance, we have to have
a satisfying personal life apart from work. Without balance, everything at
work can seem like a crisis.
Chronic overwork is the phenomenon of spending too much time
working. For some that may be 12 hours a day; for others, four hours is
too much. This is a growing American problem but it has always been an
issue in health care.
A hospital is a high-stress environment to begin with, and overwork
just throws fuel on the flame. Tempers flare more quickly, impulsive
decisions are made, we overreact, and teamwork and the quality of care
suffer. When many people work side by side under this much stress, it
distorts the way they interact with others, and unfortunately, molehills
turn into mountains. Yet within the work place, overwork can seem
normal simply because everyone does it.
The challenge is not to find more vacation time (although that may
be necessary), but to find a way to live a balanced life in the midst of
everyday responsibilities.
Working more doesn’t mean I’m working better. Others can fill in for me. The quality
of my work will improve as I find a balance.
#d 140 D3
Taking Pride in Your Work
JCAHO recently rewarded us with incredibly high scores for patient
safety and high clinical quality and service. And, not long ago, our
hospital was named one of the nation’s 100 Top Hospitals® . This is the
eleventh time one of our hospitals has received this recognition. We are
justly proud of these accomplishments, and yet, for our sake and the sake
of our organization, we must step back and think about what kind of pride
we are feeling and what we are going to do with it.
Let’s go with the idea that there are two kinds of pride: “good” pride and
“bad” pride. We may be quick to label pride as a “bad” thing in part
because we hear it referred to as one of the seven deadly sins. The sinful
kind is borne of arrogance, or full-of-oneself puffery that results in
being blinded to shortcomings and potential pitfalls. Consumed by this
kind of pride, people assume an attitude of being so perfect that there’s
no room for improvement, no need to get input from others. Before
long, complacency sets in. Arrogant pride also breeds a feeling of
superiority, fed by an unhealthy competition and need to compare,
which greatly diminishes one’s ability to work as a team or unite around
achieving new goals as an organization. They are headed toward a cliff and
don’t see it coming because they’re too busy patting themselves on the
back. Remember the biblical phrase, “pride goeth before the fall.”
But, there is such a thing as good pride. When we experience an accom-
plishment that fills us with “good” pride, we are pleased with the outcome
itself, rather than what it says about us. This prideful feeling is tempered
with a dose of humility and self-reflection, which leads us to experience a
sense of accomplishment that is grounded in the knowledge that there’s
also room for improvement. Unhealthy competition and comparison
#d 141 D3
have no place here, since we don’t have the need to steal the spotlight and overhears a visitor commenting on the cleanliness of the hospital, that’s
lay claim to the achievement. It allows us to see that our accomplishment a cause for honest pride. It is the sentiment that an office assistant
is the product of good teamwork, not a reflection of our superiority. has when she is satisfied with the way she writes an errorless letter. We
are appreciative of the billing clerk’s talent to catch errors before bills
At this institution, are we proud in the sense that we can boast on are sent.
billboards around the city that we are the city’s best hospital? Of course
not. We are, however, rightfully pleased with our accomplishments. We are not pianists, athletes or actors, yet we are all artists in our own way.
We can realize the value of the work we do, acknowledge our achievements,
The genius pianist, Vladimir Horowitz was intensely proud, and yet he be grateful for the recognition we receive, celebrate it and push on.
was also critical of himself. When he was about to receive a Lifetime
Achievement Award for being the most accomplished pianist of the last Can I take pride in my work and in my organization?
century, he was asked why he never smiled after playing. He replied, “I see
what others don’t. My playing has to improve. I’m driven to improve.
Why smile when something is not the way it needs to be?” The kind of
pride we strive for is the type artisans have when they take enormous
pleasure in the outcome of all the effort they put in and the skill level
they have achieved. And yet, this feeling is not the domain of artists or
“special” people, an idea that the culture particularly supports. Our
society constantly tells us that athletes and entertainers are our most
important citizens. If you eliminate them for a week however, society
wouldn’t fall apart. Try eliminating farmers, sanitation workers, nurses,
LPNs, housekeepers, dietary staff or lab technicians. Society would
fall apart.

Whatever job you have in the health care system, it is essential. Your pride
comes from the fact that what you do is valuable and necessary. Your job
contributes to the hospital’s reputation for high quality. When someone
works hard to clean and polish the floor of a busy corridor and then

#d 142 D3 #d 143 D3
 The Impact of Working with Soul
The quality of our work is measured one interaction at a time. Its value is exquisitely balanced ecosystem. The Dead Sea, however, has no outflow.
determined as much by how we work as it is by what we actually do. If our Only the Jordon River feeds it, with no rivers or streams leaving it. As
work is performed in a soul-less, mechanical way, its quality is dimin- a result of having no outlet for “giving away” its water, the Dead Sea has
ished, along with our experience. But, by creating a conscious intention such a high salt content that it cannot support any life, thus the name,
of connecting with patients and coworkers, we enhance our experience, Dead Sea.
as well as the care we provide. The quality of our work improves.
Whether in a cubical, windowless office, lab, or bedside, our work is,
All of us know colleagues who demonstrate a unique ability to make a in and of itself, both necessary and valuable. Whatever your job, you
lasting impact on those they serve. If they performed like robots with the are going to have an impact on the people around you and on your
intention of just getting the job done, they would not likely have left organization as a whole. The question is what kind of impact do you want
an impression. to have? How you perform your job presents you with the opportunity
to transform it into an authentic expression of the desire to heal and
People who infuse their work with soul give each person, with each contribute to a cohesive, supportive and productive environment. The
interaction, a piece of themselves, and that piece enriches the lives of people who work with soul motivate us and show us how to relate to one
both giver and receiver. It would seem that if they kept giving and giving another and to our patients in welcoming ways.
and giving of themselves, there would be nothing left. Ironically, these
people end the day feeling fulfilled, not empty. Those who work in this Today, I will be aware of how I do my job. I will focus on how I can contribute to
way are left with a feeling of accomplishment and a day well lived. all with whom I come in contact. I will enjoy my work more as I function with a
soulful intention.
Many religious and spiritual beliefs are rooted in the notion that when we
act with selflessness, we expand in energy and awareness. When we receive
without giving, we actually contract. The Dead Sea, when thought of as a
metaphor, illustrates this point. Typical lakes are teeming with marine
life. This is only possible because of the continual inflow and outflow of
nutrient-rich rivers and streams. It’s not enough for there to just be an
inflow. The vitality of these lakes is just as dependent on the outflow
of the rivers, because they allow for an interaction of spawning fish in
addition to flushing out waste and other matter. All of this works in an

#d 144 D3 #d 145 D3
 Having a Lasting Impact
Recently, I was involved in two seemingly unrelated meetings. What they
both illustrated was the powerful ripple effect of our everyday words and
actions not only on the people we treat, but on the overall functioning of
our organization. The first was with a communications executive who was
asked where she planned to budget her scarce financial resources: on an
advertising campaign to the community promoting the positive things
happening at the hospitals, or on internal communications projects?
Without hesitating, she responded, “The best advertisements for the hos-
pitals are its employees.” She explained that good external advertising
campaigns can be very effective in bolstering community support for
our hospitals. However, internal projects that lead to greater employee
satisfaction and bolster morale and belief in the value of their work
have a subtle but even more powerful impact in shaping our hospital’s
reputation in the community. With each positive employee/patient
interaction, our reputation in the community is slowly enhanced. As
these experiences accumulate, they become the most powerful public
relations campaign we could ever have.
started coming to the hospital for three hours, every week, and has been
doing so for the past ten years. No, not for treatment, but to volunteer as
a Patient Visitor on the same floor where he had been a patient so many
years earlier. Why does he do this? Out of sheer gratitude to those who
cared for him.
The communications executive was coming from an advertising and
public relations perspective. Her statement was a reminder that every
single employee is an ambassador for an institution. In addition to that,
our words and behaviors outside of work subtly shape the community’s
perception also. The appreciative patient is a reminder of how influential
we are in patients’ lives. Each of us, wherever we work and whatever we do,
can build a better world. We are more influential than we might imagine.
I will be aware of the lives I’m influencing. I will be an ambassador for healing as I
touch others’ lives. This awareness adds meaning to my work and to my personal life.

Each one of us has the power, through our words and actions, to create a
cumulative wave of good will, raising our community’s perception of us
and building up our hospital’s reputation.

If you don’t think we can have this kind of monumental impact, consider
this. A week after my meeting with this communications executive, I met a
former patient of ours who, twelve years ago, had been hospitalized for
more than a month following surgery. A few weeks after his first operation,
he had to undergo a second one. Today, he is in good health and in his
mid-fifties. What few people know is that after he fully recovered, he

#d 146 D3 #d 147 D3
 Expressing Our Inner Lives
A physician who had just run the Boston Marathon told me that he had
originally planned to use his cell phone to call friends during the 26 mile
race. “After all,” he quipped, “I had three hours on my hands!”
However, once he began to run, he changed his mind. In the long
tradition of runners, he decided to write someone’s name in large letters
all over his shirt. The name he picked was that of his son, Michael, who
had died in a sporting accident the year before. The physician chose to
run in his boy’s honor.
Our inner life needs time to be nourished, time for reflection. Some
people meditate, others find a spot in nature to dwell, while some people
simply use the opportunity of the traditional morning cup of coffee
to find a few moments of silence. Our inner life is difficult to describe
and even more challenging to measure. Tuning into it shapes how we
see the world. If we take a more contemplative approach to life and work,
our interactions change, the quality of our focus improves, and our
interpretation of people’s words and actions are less judgmental. It is our
choice to bring our inner life to work or to leave it at home.

He spoke of what it felt like to have spectators notice his son’s name as Today, I will nourish my inner life with time for reflection. My inner life will enrich
they cheered him on. They were yelling out, “Go for it! Run for my work experience and the lives of other if I let it.
Michael!” Words couldn’t convey what it felt like to run for, and with, his
son. No wonder he decided not to use his cell phone. It would have been
an interruption of the deeper experience of this event. Instead of the
three hours being empty space, they turned out to be an expression of his
love for his child.

His first inclination was to fill the void. Instead, in an unforeseen

moment, he decided to tuck the phone away and be with the void. How
many of us don’t tune into ourselves because we want to steer clear of the
void? Either we’re afraid of it or we think we’ll be bored. Until we slow
down, get quiet, and openly listen to the soulful voice within, we will miss
the richness of our inner lives. By choosing to take in the real meaning of
this marathon, the physician’s experience was memorable. It changed
what he saw and how he lived.

#d 148 D3 #d 149 D3
Taking a Fresh Look at OurandLifeOur Work
We usually think of time as a commodity. One moment adds to another
in linear fashion. When in linear time, we generally think in terms of
past, present, and the future. As we become a little older, time becomes
a commodity with less and less remaining. We spend it wisely.
How do we avoid that? It starts with the recognition that we are tired.
Next, we can pull back for a time and remember what we treasure about
our jobs. These are fragile moments and need to be nourished. They
support our dreams about our sense of mission. When we are true to
ourselves, work is always more fulfilling; a full expression of who we are.

Time is also cyclical. Holidays, birthdays, and anniversaries, reoccur Today, I will get in touch with what motivated me to get into health care. I will think
yearly. So do seasons. We find comfort in their predictability. Cyclical about how work nourishes me and renew my personal commitment to my sense of
time awakens memory. That is why it is so important. It is the kind of time mission as expressed through what I do.
that reminds us that life is never finished.

Think of wedding anniversaries. They are opportunities to turn toward

one another in fresh ways. Couples are grateful for what has been but they
are also challenged to break free from the patterns that bind them, and
to express what has not yet been expressed. This process deepens the
relationship and makes life together stronger. Cyclical time has a way
of pushing us beyond ourselves. Issues and problems never go away
just because we work on them once. It may seem as if we have reached
resolution, but there’s always another dimension that hasn’t been
explored. “I thought I was done with that problem!” It may seem as if
we are back where we started but in fact, we’re now approaching it from
a higher point. It’s like following a circular path around and up a
mountain. Every few hours, we find ourselves facing east again. The
novice will think, “I haven’t gotten anywhere.” But the mature one
realizes, “I’m a thousand feet higher!” Cyclical time helps us become wiser.

The routine of health care can be extremely repetitive. It can wear us

down, causing us to err.

#d 150 D3 #d 151 D3
ID Tags and “Uniforms” as Symbols
of Our Professional Ideals
nicate to others that we are representatives of the medical profession
Work may seem routine, but if we take a closer look, it is quite extraor- and of our hospital. People confer authority on us, and it is up to us to
dinary. To glimpse its significance, consider something as simple as our live up to the trust they place in us.
identification tags, scrubs or white coats. They signal to our patients
what we do. They establish our credentials and proficiency and reassure Our health care organization has no face other than you and I.
them that the person treating them is competent to do so. For someone
who is ill, the signs are reassuring. My ID tag or uniform is a symbol of my commitment to the profession of healing.
When I put on my ID tag or uniform, I am showing others and reminding myself that
All of us need symbols. They help us understand what words cannot. A I am committed to the ideals of my profession.
stole, for example is a symbol that indicates that the person wearing it has
special authority. Magistrates, judges, and ministers wear this piece of
cloth over their shoulders when they perform their duties. The symbol
reminds those wearing it of their professional responsibilities and com-
mitment. It awakens them to the need to live up to the highest standards
of their profession. For those they serve, the stole confers authority and
a degree of trustworthiness.

A badge is another symbol. When policemen wear the badge, it means

they have particular responsibilities entrusted to them by society. Similar
to priests and rabbis, they are part of something larger than themselves.

You and I wear symbols. While we do not wear stoles or badges, we do

wear scrubs, white coats, and employee identification tags that commu-

#d 152 D3 #d 153 D3
 Slowing Down and Feeling Grateful
When we are busy, health care can seem like it is merely a job. There are
procedures to follow, policies to implement, rooms to ready, charts to
review, walls to paint, bills to send, prescriptions to fill, materials to
purchase, and patients to discharge. It’s no wonder we are in a rush.
When we slow down, it gives us the chance to appreciate the fact that
we are people caring for people. Our work place serves as a unique
environment for demonstrating something intangible about life, love,
service, and caring. Not only do we express our best qualities in the
service of our patients, but we are putting love in action.
Why is it so difficult to speak of love? Possibly because it might be viewed
as inappropriate. It is not. Making the extra effort to reach out to others
enriches our own lives.
I will appreciate the truly amazing work that I’m called to do and the caring that
takes place. There is value in slowing down and being grateful.
#d 154 D3
Teamwork and the RestlessAttitude to Excel
There is a popular saying that “teamwork is the fuel that allows common
people to attain uncommon results.” “Common people” may not sound
exciting, but they are. Uncommon results may not seem unusual. They are.
The construction of spectacular buildings, monuments or bridges is a
physical reminder of the power of teamwork. No one ever built a bridge
by himself. But, there are many examples of teamwork. Here are two.
A team in our hospital created a Centering Pregnancy program. The
entire practice attended the initial training, even those not particularly
excited about providing prenatal care a different way. In this program,
every team member has a voice and volunteers their time to do the work
required of the group. Not only has the Centering team successfully
implemented a program that begins a new group every month, they have
introduced Centering Pregnancy for Spanish speaking women and
pregnant teens. The shared mission and values keep the entire team
aligned, and the victories and challenges are shared by the entire practice.
They are a remarkable example of a high functioning team.
Another example was the building and opening of a new medical center.
What a team effort to accomplish such a massive project on time and on
budget! They shared a common goal, vision, and dream, which created a
feeling of camaraderie that fueled their accomplishments. Each team
member pitched in to do whatever was needed. There were no questions
about job titles, job descriptions, role clarity or asking, “who was
responsible for doing this?” The power of such alignment and working
in unison was evident in what they were able to accomplish.
#d 155 D3

Those working to construct a new hospital or clinic know the value of
working as a team to achieve uncommon results. No one on those teams
would think for a moment that they could do the job alone. The same is
true for people working in any hospital, clinic, treatment center or
physician practice. Within those walls, teams of individuals are providing
extraordinary clinical care and service by combining their talents. No
individual working alone, not even the most highly talented, can do what
he or she does without the help of others. It takes a team that is united in
purpose, plan and vision. It requires a surrendering of ego to the greater
good of this common goal.
It is inspiring to think that this is possible, that by sharing a vision with
others, together, we can achieve amazing results.
Am I clear about my team’s or organization’s vision and my role in it? What can I do
to recommit to this vision?
#d 156 D3
Changing the Mood with Our Words
Our moods are shaped by many factors—external events—the weather, and
our health—among other things. Children, especially, can change our
mood in an instant. Just think of a child running excitedly into your
arms. It can brighten your whole day in an instant. Our colleagues, too,
can have a profound affect on our mood, particularly ones who sport a
generally optimistic view of life. The happiest people on earth are the
ones who are grateful. They see everything, including their own lives,
as a gift.
Our own speech also influences how we feel. That is because the spoken
word lingers and collects in our memory. Remember when a colleague or
your boss complimented you on a particular assignment or task? The next
time you approached a similar task or even a new one, you were likely
filled with more confidence and enthusiasm. Similarly, after receiving
a comment that was not offered in a helpful spirit, we could have felt
burdened, resentful or even insecure about our abilities. The impact of
one person’s words influences how we feel as well as how we work.
Think of the power we have to change a person’s mood when we genuine-
ly compliment him or her on a job well done, encourage a colleague who
is trying to develop fresh skills, or help someone who is taking on new
responsibilities. Like so many seemingly ordinary and daily activities,
we can view these words and actions as having a sacred quality about them.
“Sacred” may seem like an unusual word to use to describe speech.
Words are sacred because they change other people, ourselves, and our
surroundings. As we speak, we create, perhaps co-create, the world
around us. That is an unnerving responsibility. Taking time to reflect on
#d 157 D3

the importance of our words is one more way to recognize our value as
individuals, our influence on our colleagues, and the opportunity to be
a healing presence to our patients.
Today, I will consciously use my words to create the world I want to work in. I will
shape my mood and make a positive contribution by complimenting coworkers,
acknowledging achievements and encouraging new efforts. I can make a difference
with my words.
#d 158 D3
Valuing Volunteerism
In another section of this book, we mentioned “vocation-loving”
individuals—that is, those who want to do what they actually have to do.
Most of us divide what we want and what we must do into two buckets.
One we call work, the other, leisure. Then, we set about trying to balance
the two or make sure that time for one does not encroach on the other.
Vocation-loving individuals do not split the two.
There is also volunteering. It’s not work because you do not get paid. Yet,
it’s not leisure; it’s hard work. People do it because they want to help.
Many vocation-loving people have more energy left at the end of the day
and volunteer their free time after work. They even bring their children
with them in an effort to integrate their home life and work life.
Health care is filled with people who are imbued with a sense of giving.
Many hospital personnel have a history of volunteering to work in
developing countries.
The generosity of our physicians and employees, both current and
retired, is one more indication that beneath the hustle and bustle of daily
life, there lives a genuine yearning of the human spirit to be of help to
others, selflessly.
I will look for ways to give back to my community, whether it is within miles of where
I live or on the other side of the world.
#d 159 D3
 Carrying Our Inner Lives to Work
All of us have lives apart from work. We bring that outside life to work
each day. Here are two examples:
Some of our employees have family members serving in the armed
services. One employee in the Facilities Department spoke of what it was
like to have a son in Iraq. He spoke of the emotional strain of just listen-
ing to the morning news and hearing the words, “Three of our soldiers
were killed earlier today….” The father always had to wait two weeks to
find out if his son was among them. A man in this position carries a
weight we can only imagine.
These are some common examples of how our personal experiences color
our work life. The emotional lines blur between home and work; between
our inner and our outer lives. All of us have an inner sanctuary where we
hold concerns. Simply recognizing the influence that these have on our
work life and being open to the inner lives of our colleagues and patients,
allows for a richer work experience and greater tolerance for all.
Today, I will respect my coworkers, patients and others with whom I come in con-
tact. I will look for ways to care for myself and be sensitive to the inner lives of
my coworkers.

Another employee who worked on the third floor was entering the
building when I met up with her right before the elevator. She was so
excited that her eyes actually glistened. She was pregnant and was only a
few days from delivery. Her enthusiasm was positively contagious. I
stepped into the elevator; she did not. When the doors opened on the
third floor, there she was!

“How did you get here?” I asked.

“The steps,” she said.
“Why not the elevator?”
“Because I’m trying to take care of myself as well as my baby.”

She managed to find little ways to get exercise and care for her pregnancy,
even as she made her way to her office to begin her work day. She was
creative in how she was able to care for herself and her unborn child,
while at the same time doing her job.

#d 160 D3 #d 161 D3
By Caring forWeOneCreate
Another
a Culture of Care
While our focus at work is always on our patients, we are also part of a
Working in health care creates challenges. Those of us with patient larger community of colleagues where we care for one another, and where
contact walk through the doors of our work place and are immediately each person has a role to play in creating the climate. By taking a second
drawn into meeting the needs of people who are in a great deal of look at the people in our work community and attempting to get to know
discomfort, pain, or who perhaps are dying. Those of us not involved them better, we not only enrich our lives, but we cultivate trust, which
directly in patient care have equally demanding responsibilities. Both makes working together easier, especially when we’re under pressure.
types of work challenge us to be selfless.
A culture of care isn’t just for patients or just for colleagues. Caring for
Recently, there was a memorial service for one of our employees, a young one another doesn’t take away from our capacity to care for patients; in
woman who worked for many years at one of our hospitals. At least fifty fact, it enhances it. While it may be difficult to prove, the more sensitive
employees were in attendance at the service, which was the second one we are to one another, the better service we will provide for our patients.
held in her memory. The first was for her family; this one was for us.
During the service, photographs flashed onto a screen behind the altar. I will contribute toward building a community of caring by expanding my focus to
Most were of her and friends (many of whom were employees) scaling include my colleagues and their needs. I will take a moment to get to know someone
mountains, canoeing, and enjoying one another. A friend remarked a little better and I will reveal a little more about myself.
that even when she was dying of cancer, she was the life of the party and
people seemed drawn to her. “Most days there were five or six people
hanging around her home in the evening, sometimes as many as thirty
people. She was extremely lively and welcoming. She exuded life.”

Our colleague’s death reminds us of how important we are to one

another. We are a community. We need one another. We spend much
time at work. Some of us work ten hours a day, many longer. Friendships
are made. Often enough, we party or go out to eat with one another.
There are even leagues where we bowl on Friday and Saturday evenings.
Some ski, others bike together. In a manner of speaking the work place
resembles a village in bygone days where it provided for almost all of the
villagers’ needs.

#d 162 D3 #d 163 D3
 Avoidance
Scott Peck, the psychiatrist, opened his best seller, The Road Less
Traveled with this first line, “Life is difficult.” He then went on to
describe how we try to avoid life’s inevitable problems, and as a result,
have a tendency to create even more trouble for ourselves. The book
outlines how we can change that approach by delaying gratification and
facing problems head-on, knowing that the payoff will come later by
taking responsibility for one’s life, by being dedicated to truth, and by
cultivating the skill of balancing emotional reactions and the unavoidable
highs and lows. The book artfully explores the importance of being
flexible, learning how to give up parts of ourselves while still remaining
true to our values. In his view, love fuels all of these efforts.
After twenty-five years, the book is still popular largely because most of us
recognize our tendency to avoid painful difficulties. Yet we also want
to learn how to respond in a more courageous and authentic way. In a
nutshell, it takes courage and self-discipline to stand by our convictions.
I know the problems associated with staying in a job when I knew I should
have moved on. I was working in a hospital system and reporting to an
individual with whom I found it difficult to work. Maybe it was solely my
issue, maybe hers. Likely both. In retrospect, I would say that we were
mismatched as players who, unfortunately, were charged with trying to get
the work done in an integrated, coordinated manner. Our conflicting
styles made working in a close partnership challenging. While others
affirmed my performance and wanted me to stay (including the CEO
to whom we both reported), I recognized that I needed to leave. I did
not—at least not right away. Why? It was a case of fear mixed with a touch
of stubbornness.
#d 164 D3
Most of us have been in situations where we have had to make a decision
whether to begin a difficult conversation or to avoid it. We sacrifice a
lot when we avoid expressing our views. Avoidance diminishes pride in
our work, eats away at our commitment to excellence and leaks out in
interactions with coworkers and patients as pessimism and cynicism.
Excellence in clinical care and service requires that we have, at times,
difficult conversations. Why? Because if we want there to be continuous
improvement, we have to challenge the way things have always been done,
accept new approaches, question the value of our pet projects, and even
terminate a work relationship that is “easy” but not serving patients or
supporting quality care efforts.
It would certainly be easier to coast through the workday, avoid making
suggestions, and look the other way when we see an injustice or a
mismanaged department. A few may say, “Better to plod along, stay in the
crowd, and avoid lofty aspirations. Settle for being average.” Yet, this is
not the path to greatness. Avoiding difficulties actually increases rather
than resolves problems.
If we want to create an organization that is not only committed to
excellence but is aligned with our personal and professional values, we
have to support a climate that encourages others to initiate difficult
conversations. Risky conversations can produce amazing results if
we engage in them with the purest of intention honestly and with the
intention of improving the quality of patient care. Questioning takes
courage and is the boldest of beginnings.
I will reflect on the courage and self-discipline I need to speak out and express my
needs and opinions. I will initiate a difficult conversation, if necessary, and I will live
a life of integrity.
#d 165 D3
 Attitudes about Money
Shape How We Treat Others
Money is a problem. Our attitude toward money, which is often a charged
topic, reveals many insights about ourselves. The problem is that we do not
always talk about it in an honest and open way. Just because we don’t discuss
it does not mean that it does not influence our dealings with others.
Ironically, while we may not discuss money at work, the culture around
us seems preoccupied with it. TV programs are devoted to tracking
financial markets. Financial advice is offered 24 hours a day on the
Money channel. Game shows seemingly give away millions much to our
delight. Turn on the TV after midnight and you’ll preview one get-rich-
quick scheme after another, all playing on people’s hopes of discovering
instant riches.
You do not have to be in a health care organization very long to know
that it and the financial world are tightly interconnected. Despite our
highest intention to be solely on a mission of healing, many decisions
are financially driven.
On the other hand, talking directly about money is uncomfortable, even
if it is at the top of our worry list. Few of us reveal our salaries to our
colleagues. Often, we secretly believe that this dollar amount says
something important about our worth as individuals. It reflects our
value in the eyes of our employer. Telling others what we make will not
only expose some hidden truth about our worth but may stir up
comparisons, competition and conflict among our colleagues.
#d 166 D3
The dollar amount in our paycheck also holds great sway over how we view
ourselves. High salaries tend to enhance our self-worth. Being under-
employed diminishes how we feel about ourselves and our abilities.
Honest conversations about money are hard to come by even in the
privacy of our home life. Parents find it difficult to talk about their
savings to their adult children for fear that either they will think of them
as less successful, or that they’ll pressure them to share their assets. Not
surprisingly, every marriage counselor is trained to look for the hidden
and unacknowledged role that money plays in troubled relationships
because how it is spent, saved, and discussed (or not) speaks volumes
about the degree of honesty, the power-balance and the values within the
relationship. Despite the undergrounding of financial matters, the values
and power dynamics surrounding money—how it is spent or saved—wield
strong influence over marriages.
Walk down the street and notice the homeless on the sidewalk. It will
remind you of the role that money plays in life. We may think, “There but
for the grace of God go I,” or we may wonder what they have done to end
up in this predicament. When our eyes meet, we handle our unease by
turning away.
You may ask, “So what if I harbor these feelings about money? What does
that have to do with working in a hospital and dealing with patients?” As
health care professionals, we come in contact with the full spectrum of
society, from the very rich to the very poor, and regardless of their finan-
cial status, we are committed to improving their health. Knowing that our
#d 167 D3

deeply held beliefs about money—whether we admit to them or not—
influence our actions, we are obligated to take a more pensive look at how
our beliefs impact the way we treat our patients and their families.
As professionals, we serve our communities very well, often exceptionally
so. Yet, a number of recently published studies indicate that the caregiv-
er’s perception of a patient’s financial resources may significantly lower
the quality of care. If we don’t take the time and have the courage to
uncover these truths about our attitudes, they will continue to direct our
actions, maybe in ways that conflict with our equally strongly-held values
of providing exceptional and fair and safe treatment to all, regardless of
the person’s financial standing. Whatever the truth may be for you, this
moment, like every moment, is a good time to look inward.
Do I change my level of care depending on my perception of a patient’s economic
situation? Every individual has dignity; each life is sacred.
#d 168 D3
Memorial Day: Learning from
Those Who’ve Gone Before Us
Memorial Day isn’t only about White Sales at Macy’s or barbecues in the
backyard. It is an opportunity to commemorate the people who have died
in service to our country. Those who serve in the armed services never
serve alone. They are always someone’s child, husband, wife, relative,
buddy, or colleague. When one person goes off to serve his country, he
leaves behind a whole circle of people who miss his presence and worry
about him. “No man is an island” is an oft-used phrase, and it is true.
All of our lives are built on the lives of those who have gone before us.
Soldiers sacrifice theirs so that we can keep ours. We have what we have
because of them. A wordless prayer of gratitude will not lessen the tragedy
of their loss, but it is surely a fitting response.
We can turn this day of memory into an opportunity for bettering this
world by listening to those who have died. To hear them speak, all we have
to do is be quiet for a moment or two. What do you think a young man
of twenty-two who was blown up by an IED would say to his grieving
mother? What would the father who died on foreign soil say to his son
who will now grow up without him? While we often think of these soldiers
as without names, they are not. They are our teachers and they are
continually reminding us of what is important in life.
None of us knows the words that our loved ones would speak. Likely, they
would counsel us to live deliberatively and without regret.
Today, I will be grateful for those soldiers who’ve sacrificed their lives. I will honor
their lives by carrying on in their memory.
#d 169 D3
The Stillness of Being a Healing Presence
To define the word presence is difficult. People will say, “Of course I’m
present. I know I’m here. What else is there?” But to be truly present is
to be attentive to them, not to ourselves. That is very difficult to do.
What does it mean to be a healing presence? It means that we are
attentive in a manner whereby the other person feels healed. It involves
a profound act of sharing. When someone is ill or dying, being a
healing presence is invaluable.
Being a healing presence is more than sharing feelings or advice. It is often
experienced by others as peacefulness, quiet, and stillness. Nothing lessens
a patient’s fears more than when we share this precious gift. Human
companionship lessens pain and calms anxieties. We benefit as well.
Today, I will try something new. I will take a few deep breaths before entering a
patient’s room or begin a meeting. I will see how my life is enriched when I open
myself to be present to another.

To be a healing presence, we must be genuinely present to the other

person in need. By opening up our heart and spirit to the other, the
suffering one will feel connected. This is a gift to be cherished.

Often, particularly when people are ill, they can feel terribly alone. As
author Anne Morrow Lindberg said, there is not a greater gift than when
“two solitudes touch.” That is another way to describe what it means to be
a healing presence.

We cannot be a healing presence while we are self-absorbed. Being pre-

occupied by anything other than the person to whom we minister hinders
our presence. Rambling thoughts take us away from bringing ourselves
into the present moment. Surprisingly, we are never more in touch with
ourselves than when we are present to the other.

We can learn how to be a healing presence to others. Take time to be

quiet. Work at becoming reflective. Take a few minutes to sit with what you
are feeling.

#d 170 D3 #d 171 D3
Purposeful Reflection:
Do You Truly Value Time?
Time is a precious commodity, and perhaps our most prized possession. Life is a gift. When we
talk about time, it is easy to dismiss the deeper meaning of these seeming-
ly trite, simple expressions. Slow down and examine the truth behind it.
The reality is that our lives are time-bound—we have only so many
moments. Recognizing time as a precious commodity is an invitation to
use it wisely.
When we think of life’s hours as limited and precious, it lets us examine
what we value. Each of us knows how we need to use the time. The
question is, do we have the courage to act on what we know?
Reflecting purposefully on the notion of time is one more invitation to
live honestly, to use our time well, to love genuinely, and to die having
devoted ourselves to life-enabling and valued activities.
Whatever responsibilities we have, whether at a bedside, in an operating
room, or a windowless office, whether repairing what is broken, cleaning
what is soiled, or carefully bandaging what is tender, all of us are valued
and all of our jobs are important.
Today, I will purposefully reflect on how I use my time. I will be courageous in my use
of time. I will use it to love genuinely and serve with purpose. I will be aware of the
precious gift of time that I’ve been given and I will use it with a sense of purpose.
#d 172 D3
Bringing Anticipation, Re-Dedication
and Celebration to Our Work
Christmas is the season of anticipation. Christian churches celebrate
what is called Advent, a time of anticipation leading up to the birth of
Jesus. Believing that God took on human flesh, is another way that
Christians express their belief in the sacredness of the world.
It is also a season of remembering and spiritual rededication for the
Jewish community. As they celebrate Hannukah, they recall the events
that led up to the rededication of the Temple of Jerusalem. The ritual
of lighting a candle each day for eight days, represents a time in ancient
history when a Jewish tribe, the Maccabees, fought for the freedom to
worship according to their beliefs. At the end of the fighting all they
could find in their destroyed temple was enough oil to light a lamp for
a day. Miraculously, the oil kept the lamp lit for eight days. This
story inspires Jews to appreciate their religious freedom to rededicate
themselves to their religion.
This season of religious events bring us back to our spiritual roots. If we
slow down, we can feel the sacredness of the season. In the midst of daily
work life, whatever our faith tradition, we can let this hallowed time
influence our work with the qualities of anticipation, re-dedication and
celebration that these holidays represent.
I will seize this day to revitalize my work with the anticipation, re-dedication
and celebration taught by the people of the past. I can learn and benefit from
many traditions.
#d 173 D3
 Learning from Failure
Recently, I was with a person who was directly involved in a situation
that nearly resulted in serious harm to a patient. She felt incredibly
responsible and had the strength of character to speak openly of how
she unknowingly contributed to the patient’s injury. While others
admired her for her ability to speak honestly, she nevertheless felt
terrible. In fact, she felt like a failure.
Most of the time, we think of failure as something bad. On the contrary,
it is a time for learning. Times of success are periods for resting. When
we’re successful, there are fewer opportunity to challenge our thinking,
make mistakes and learn. Success is enjoyable; failure is painful. We need
both to grow.
Think of the story of Adam and Eve. Adam and Eve walked blissfully in
the Garden of Good and Evil. Life was lovely and free from stress. They
were unaware that they were naked. What happened when they did
something wrong? When they failed? They became aware that they were
naked. They became conscious. Failure is the path to awareness. It is
through failure and awareness that we grow.
While failure is uncomfortable and something none of us welcomes, it is
nevertheless a graced moment. Like it or not, failure is the soil from
which learning rises.
Today, I’ll take a moment to reflect on times when I’ve failed. When situations arise
where I fall short, I will not berate myself but learn from them.
#d 174 D3
Being Sensitive toHidden
the
Lives of Others
Before one particular physicians’ meeting began, I heard a conversation
among a few physicians. One said she was a 5-year cancer survivor and
passionately expressed her gratitude that she was alive. Then she added, “I
never really thought about God until this happened to me.” Those who
listened seemed not to know how to respond when she mentioned God,
and so the conversation ended.
All of us struggle with how to respond to others when they bring up
difficult topics. This is particularly true when we have strong feelings and
opinions associated with the topic of conversation. Often, we hesitate to
address certain topics, particularly our experience of God. It is a gift
when the level of trust within an organization is developed to such a
degree that we can risk exposing our beliefs and experiences.
The small group that heard the cancer-survivor speak appeared to find it
difficult to respond to the physician. I suspect she felt exposed as a result
of their inability to respond. If that is true, it’s unfortunate for everyone
involved. All of us have corners of our lives appropriately hidden from
the prying eyes of others. As uncomfortable as it may be, it is not helpful
to keep our experience of God permanently locked away.
Keeping alive a sensitivity to the hidden side of life—as unsettling as it is—
helps us respond to others with genuine care. All of us need and deserve
that sensitivity.
Life is richer when connections with people deepen.
#d 175 D3
When Flowers and Praise Aren’t Enough
Clearly, anyone who is ill knows the value of a caring nurse or top-notch
physician. Most patients also appreciate the unseen professionals who
staff our hospitals and offices. While many patients might not think of
them right away, they certainly value the contribution of behind-the-
scenes employees who work in business services and as office assistants
supporting those who offer direct care to patients.
If all of this is true, and patients really are appreciative of all we do, why
don’t we feel it? It is not as if they don’t acknowledge us in touching ways.
We often receive notes after they are discharged; loved ones will thank us
for taking such good care of their grandmother, or sister or husband.
Often, we don’t take it in, or we need to hear it from our supervisor or
manager for it to carry real weight.
The perspective of the novelist Anna Quindlen is helpful. When
speaking to the graduates of a leading university, she said, “There are
thousands of people doing what you want to do for a living. But you will
be the only person alive who has sole custody of your life, your particular
life, your entire life. I have learned that [life] is not a dress rehearsal.
Learn to be happy. Think of life as a terminal illness because if you do,
you will live it with joy and passion, as it ought to be lived.” What she is
saying is that feeling valued starts with us! It’s nice to get the flowers and
the recognition, but if our happiness and sense of satisfaction from our
work relies on these outward displays, surely we will be disappointed.
We are on a journey to be the best that we can be. We want to be the best for the
sake of our patients, not for self-adulation. By taking control of my work and being
the best at what I do, I will know that my contribution is valuable and I will feel
valued. I will look for ways to acknowledge the value of others’ contributions.
#d 176 D3
Expressing Our Uniqueness
Yesterday, by chance, while waiting in line for coffee, I met one of our
employees who was talking with a nurse from a neighboring hospital
about her own three children. Clearly, she loved being a mom. “I think
I’m a natural at it. I wouldn’t trade it for the world.” Then she said
something that startled me. “This morning I realized that no one else
can take my place. This is what I was born to do!”
She was not implying that no one else in the world was a good mother.
She was saying that she was pulled to become a mother and she brings
something unique to the job. In today’s world, seldom do we hear
people speak of themselves in terms of being “called” to do anything;
this presumes that someone or some thing is beckoning and actively
playing a role in the work we do. Many of us act at times, as if we are
independent players, acting without the pull of an inner calling.
Martin Luther King Jr. lived with a sense that he was “called” and that
something was being asked of him. John Henry Newman, a nineteenth
century Englishman who, at mid-life, converted to Catholicism and
was later made a cardinal, struggled in much the same way before he was
able to pen his recognition that, “God created me to do some definite
service; he has committed some work to me which he has not committed
to another.” This was the same sentiment expressed by the mother in
the coffee shop.
Victor Frankl was the physician-writer who reminded us that no job,
however esteemed by others, provides meaningful employment. A job
simply provides an opportunity for an individual to discover his or her
uniqueness. While there are many moms in this world, the coffee shop
#d 177 D3

mom knew that she was a unique and irreplaceable person especially to
her own children. That insight is priceless.
Many of us may not feel particularly valued. In fact, we may and believe
that we are easily replaceable. Every one of us, whether at the bedside of
patients or supporting those who are, is irreplaceable. Our challenge is to
awaken to our unique talents and provide opportunities to express them.
I am a unique collection of talents, experiences and character. Their expression is my
unique contribution.
#d 178 D3
Taking the Time to Be Attentive
Yesterday, I was alone on an elevator with two physicians. One asked,
“Any New Year’s resolutions?” “Actually, yes,” said the other, “I really
want to try to be more present to people, not only the patients, but even
my family.” Clearly the physicians were friends, but I was amazed that they
spoke with such intimacy on an elevator. I did not know either of them.
As one of the physicians got off the elevator but before the door closed,
he quipped, “I wish I had your faith in being able to change yourself. I
can’t remember the last time I made a New Year’s resolution.”
When the doors closed, I had a flashback to an event where my own
inability to be attentive and present had an incalculable cost. I was a
practicing psychologist in a highly specialized psychiatric hospital. With
the support of others on her treatment team, I had approved a patient’s
request for a two-day home visit during the holidays. While at home, she
purchased a bottle of an over-the-counter medication. When she
returned to the hospital, she combined her prescribed medications with
what she bought, overdosed, and died.
Why did that memory pop into my mind after the conversation between
the two physicians on the elevator? Perhaps because the physician spoke
of her desire to be more attentive to others. I have always wondered if I
was as present to that patient as I needed to be. If I had not missed her
intense pain and hidden need, could her life have been different? And
then, there’s the question of our ability to change. I had to ask myself,
“Have I become more attentive to others’ needs since then?”
#d 179 D3

Within health care, our mission is to foster the health and healing of our
patients. It is easy to forget that before we can bring a healing presence
to others, we first have to slow down to be present. To work with those
who genuinely try to be present to one another is an immense gift. We
benefit as employees and most importantly, our patients benefit.
Today, I will try to be present to my patients, coworkers, friends and family. I will
demonstrate this in my words and actions. I will also look for ways to encourage my
coworkers to have the composure and state of mind to be present. This is the
greatest gift I can give them and myself.
#d 180 D3
Creating a Positive Work Climate
A few months ago, I attended a dinner honoring employees and physi-
cians who had a long history of service. Everyone was seated and the
invocation was about to begin when a few hungry guests began
eating prematurely. Someone remarked lightly, “Hey, you can’t eat.
Don’t you know the food hasn’t been blessed yet?” One of the people
who had dug into her plate, did not pick up on the humor. In all
seriousness she said, “I know, but I don’t want others who have already
started eating to feel uncomfortable.”
It was a small thing, yet it showed a remarkable sensitivity. The woman was
so aware of the feelings of others that even though, on her own, she would
have waited to take her first bite, for the sake of others she discarded
convention to put them at ease.
This is a helpful quality for those of us who work with patients. When
people are hospitalized, they are sensitive to the atmosphere of the
hospital. They pick up on it when two nurses don’t like each other, or
when one doctor shows disrespect. Ill will never helps the healing process.
Every time we answer a phone, glance at someone passing us in the
hallway or ask for help, the occasion is there to bring a feeling of good-
will to the work space. It isn’t just those who may be in supervisor or
managerial positions who affect others. Accountants, office assistants,
clerks, electricians, nutritionists, nurses and purchasing agents have an
impact on the climate of the work place. The fellow who mops the floor
can make a big difference with a smile or a kind word to staff and patients.
#d 181 D3

Every act creates the world. The challenge is to recognize that daily life,
itself, is a sacred act. We are players on a hallowed stage, writing our own
lines as we perform.
I will make a conscious effort to create a more positive work place. I will be an
influence for good, creating the kind of place where I want to spend my workday.
#d 182 D3
The Need for Diversity
On Martin Luther King Jr. Day, we remember a charismatic leader, a
man who awakened hope for so many, and who taught many more of us
to recognize the injustice of our ways. His famous “I Have a Dream”
speech was filled with hope and vision: “I have a dream … that one day
little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white
boys and white girls as sisters and brothers.”
When we work in a hospital, we are in the quintessential melting pot. No
matter where you live in the country, you are working with people from
many races and all socio-economic levels. We need to acknowledge
the differences, yes, but more importantly, recognize what we have in
common as human beings.
This is a particularly special holiday for people of color because King was
in the forefront of a movement to demand equality for all Americans.
They are rightfully proud of their heritage and, each of them is a gift
to our organization because they bring their unique perspective to the
work place.
Diversity is more than a gift; it is a necessity. Why? In part, because our
patients are diverse and we need to be able to reflect their world back
to them. When this mirroring is in place, it creates an immediate sense
of trust and understanding. If we are driven to excellence, and we are,
how can we serve patients well without being an equally diverse staff?
We cannot.
In Starbucks this afternoon, a particularly obnoxious patron asked
another, “Why should Black people have a special holiday?” Clearly, he
#d 183 D3

did not understand that Monday is not a holiday for a few, but for all of
us. It is the day we again remember what one man taught us, and what is
so easily forgotten: “That all men are created equal, that they are endowed
by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are
Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.”
Today, I will look at others with a renewed sensitivity and appreciation. By
honoring the diversity and rights of my colleagues and patients, everyone benefits,
including me.
#d 184 D3
Bringing Mind, BodySpirit
and
to Our Work
Last evening, PBS aired a special on the life of Thomas Jefferson. Toward
the end of the program, the narrator read from the President’s diary,
where he wrote that his personal challenge was to “integrate mind, heart
and hand.”
If someone as important as the third President of a fledgling nation
declares this as his biggest challenge—not balancing the budget, not
mediating between two political parties, not running the country—then it
must be worth considering. We would expect to read such lyrical words in
the works of philosophers or poets, not from a politician. Hospital work,
too, is practical and hands-on, yet in order to raise our performance to
the level of the excellence we desire, we must engage our minds, and
hearts as well as our hands, to the daily tasks we encounter.
We all know how it feels to work from our intellect and without our heart.
People who operate this way might become technically proficient but
they’re hardly personable. Those we touch can feel the difference.
And from within ourselves, we know what it feels like when our bodies
are at work yet our minds are elsewhere; we tend to feel detached. A
detached workforce is not the soil from which genuine care and excellence
in care rise.
On the other hand, we all know people whose hearts are in the right
place, but they are not focused or grounded. They tend to be ineffective.
A hospital cannot serve its patients without a staff that can carry out its
practical duties.
#d 185 D3

As Jefferson wrote, we need to integrate heart, mind and hand together.
The challenge is to create the kind of work place where this is possible. We
have to ask ourselves, “Is anything getting in the way?” Some say new
policies and procedures are needed. Others point a finger at senior
management or at another department. We need to look at ourselves
first to discover what is missing. As Jefferson knew so well, change begins
with the individual. It begins at this moment, in this place, with this
person, doing this task.
Today, I will improve the quality of my work by integrating my knowledge, my heart
and my hands into all that I do. I am responsible for my actions and the work
environment I help create.
#d 186 D3
Using TragedyMindful
and Illness to Be
of Life and Work
Each year we remember and perhaps re-live the emotions we felt on
September 11, 2001. Our sense of national invulnerability was exposed
and we had to rethink our views of the world and our place in it. The
catastrophe ruptured our sense of trust and awakened the suspicious
side of our nature, making us hyper-vigilant towards people from
other cultures.
How we respond to tragedy reveals how we approach life-altering events
and the fear that accompanies them. Some people panicked after 9-11
and wanted heads to roll. They were hardened by the visions of horror.
For others, the memory of that day provided an opportunity to reflect on
its meaning—that you never know when death will strike. It could be a
sunny Tuesday morning. Their response is to live each day as if it were
their last. Still others were simply stunned and didn’t know what their
response to this disaster should be. All they could do was sit in silence.
Illness as well as tragedy can help us think about life in fresh ways if we let
it. For example, when a woman came into the business office to ask about
her bill, she was living with the thought that she may never see another
Thanksgiving. Instead of dispassionately shoving a fistful of papers at her
to sign, the clerk took the time to ask her if there was anything he could
do to help. He sat her down and simply acknowledged how hard this
might be. “I’m sorry I have to ask you to sign these at a time like this.”
Just that tiny acknowledgement made it easier for her to walk out of
the hospital. The clerk did not just see his job as getting the papers
signed. He broadened his view of his job to include reaching out to a
frightened woman.
#d 187 D3

We can all transform the impact of 9-11 by letting it soften us instead of
harden us. We can open to the deeper human connection we are capable
of having with each other.
Valuing Vacation
August is vacation time for many. Since health care is a 365-day commit-
ment, many employees are in the midst of negotiating time to be away.
There is always a give-and-take involved in these negotiations simply
because of the need to cover for one another.

Today, I will use tragedy to transform how I live my day. By changing my attitude,
I will honor the lives of those changed on September 11 and the lives of others whose
have been altered by tragedy.
Most people now think of vacations as a means of escape. Ford Motor
Company actually named their mini SUV “Escape”; billboards carry a
photo of the car and seven words: "Escape,” “Your Boss,” “Your Job,”
“Your World.” As catchy as that advertisement is, few of us in health care
take vacations solely to escape our boss, job or world.

Our attitude is closer to the Greeks. In ancient times, travel was a way to
gain wisdom. Cities would send ambassadors to faraway places to learn
from others. Passage was so slow that the village people often waited for
years to hear what the traveler had learned. Nowadays, going away to
another land is not simply an attempt to break free from what binds us,
but a genuine desire to learn.

Vacations serve a far more important function than merely offering us

an opportunity to relax. They have a way of giving us a perspective on
what is important in life and they tend to strengthen our commitment
to patients.

How we are present to ourselves and to the world—even on vacation—

determines the quality of the time away and the measure of refreshment
we feel when we return.

#d 188 D3 #d 189 D3

Some health care professionals are so devoted to their patients and
to their work that they don’t take all of their vacation time. That is
unfortunate. Everyone, even the most dedicated, need time away.
Everyone needs a change of scenery, and I will be doing my colleagues, my family and
myself a favor by taking time off!
#d 190 D3
Our Work Matters:
It’s All in Your Perspective
When hospitals, clinics, or physician offices are being constructed or
opened, a new world is being created. An observer may think it is simply
another construction project or business venture. It is, but there is
another way of thinking about it. A building is more than just a building.
A shift in perspective will illuminate that moments in every day life hold
more meaning than we realize.
Architects and caregivers have one thing in common: they both use the
materials around them to build something new. If poets, philosophers,
theologians or saints were commenting, they would refer to our activity as
co-creating an ever-changing world. No caregiver ever does anything
alone. Everything we accomplish is a collaborative effort, borrowing from
the strengths of each person.
Another thing we share with builders and architects is that our work also
goes far beyond our own lifetime. Many of the men who build roads,
bridges and skyscrapers have died, yet their legacy is left for others
to enjoy. Similarly, the pioneers who invented new drug regiments,
innovative prosthetic devices, and revolutionary medical procedures
which are now considered routine, have passed on, but their legacy of
ideas, hard work and dedication live on in us and in the patients fortu-
nate to receive the benefits of their creativity, energy and talent. And, if
we think through the domino effect of our work, the life we save or extend
impacts families almost beyond comprehension. How a child remembers
her dad, if a grandchild ever gets to enjoy experiences with a grandmoth-
er, whether a son ever takes a walk with his mother again—all of these
stories and lives become a part of our legacy and the work that we do.
#d 191 D3

By taking a bigger view of our work, we can see that everything we do col-
lectively matters greatly. Recognizing the sacredness of what we are about
has a way of changing how we think of our jobs.
I will stand back and look at my work from a larger perspective. I will see how my
work impacts the world around me, now and in the future.
#d 192 D3
Truly Listening
At the start of a regularly scheduled meeting, we took a few minutes to
check in with each other before tackling the work at hand. The practice
of taking this time is part of the hospital’s culture. A nurse spoke up, “I’m
not satisfied with the way we’re communicating with each other. People
are so busy putting out fires, they can’t slow down enough to listen
carefully to their colleagues—whether to fill orders or to share a
personal moment.”
The Director of Communications was asked her ideas about how to create
this. Given her highly developed interpersonal skills and professional
training, I expected her to offer tips to help us slow down the pace of our
lives. Instead, she talked about her daughter. “One day when I was at home
and having what I thought was a significant conversation with my daughter,
she stopped and said, ‘Mom, listen to me.’ I said that I was. ‘No Mom,’ she
said, ‘listen to me with your face.’”
Her daughter needed to see and feel that she had her mother’s full
attention or it wasn’t a real conversation. This girl has something to
teach all of us. While we may have a difficult time trying to describe what
it means to “listen with your face,” I think we can sense what it means.
The need to be heard and seen is genuine. Because our patients are so
vulnerable, they may not have the freedom that children do to honestly
tell us that they need us to “listen with our faces.” An integral part of
healing is the quality of human contact a patient experiences during the
time they are with us.
Today, I will make a conscious to listen to those who are in pain and vulnerable. I may
be the right person to help them today.
#d 193 D3
 Expressing Empathy
Every day thousands of nurses, physicians, and clinical personnel are
engaged at the bedside of patients. Hundreds more care for patients in
offices and clinics. For every clinician directly involved with patient care,
there are three support personnel who seldom have direct contact with
patients. For people in both groups, it is easy to forget what it is like to be
a patient. The essayist Anna Quindlen holds this perspective when she
speaks of being a teenager and experiencing her mother’s death from
ovarian cancer. Her life changed forever.
“One day you [are] walking around worrying about whether you
[have] anything to wear to a party, and reminding yourself to buy kitty
litter or toilet paper. And then you [are] in the shower lathering up, or
you [are] lying on a doctor’s table, or the phone rings. And your world
suddenly divides, as my world did many years ago. It divides into ‘before’
and ‘after.’”
Reflecting on these ideas can help us in our work. When we send out bills,
answer phones, place orders for medical equipment, maintain schedules
for office personnel, assure clean and comfortable rooms for patients,
launder bed linens, or count pills for a prescription, we are caring
for others at particularly vulnerable times in their lives. Doing it with
kindness, warmth, and humor—whoever they may be and however they
might look—is immensely important. It’s tragic to care for others without
empathy and compassion. Remembering how it feels to be vulnerable
makes it easier to serve others with the compassion they deserve.
Today, I will think back on a time when I was vulnerable. What was most comforting
for me? Who was the most healing person for me at that time?

Once you know your days are limited, it is not easy to take life for
granted again.

Most of us have had experiences where our lives seem to be rolling along
and our solitary focus is on crossing off the classic errands from our list.
We are rushing from one store to the next wondering how we’re going to
get it all done, when out of the blue, news of a friend’s death or a family
member’s scary diagnosis instantly suspends our life. Nothing before that
matters and the future seems suddenly scary and uncertain. Every patient
can tell you about such a moment, when they were shaken with the
knowledge of their mortality. Some day, we too will be patients, and as
vulnerable as those we currently serve.

#d 194 D3 #d 195 D3
 Making Eye Contact
On the way to work, while sitting at a stoplight, I noticed, but looked away
from, a young homeless man standing on the corner with the sign that
read, “Anything will help.” As I fiddled with the radio, I looked up again.
Now, he was at the side of my car, no more than a foot from my window.
Our eyes met. Usually, I do not give to people standing on street corners,
but this time there was something about his eyes and face that changed my
attitude. They called for a response, and I gave him some money.
Throughout the day, I remembered that man’s eyes. I also had flashbacks
of times when I have avoided others’ eyes. I particularly remember my
decades-long practice of sitting in nursing stations with my head down while
charting. I consciously wanted to avoid eye contact so I could finish my work,
afraid that if our eyes met, I’d be asked to take care of someone’s needs.
Do I mention these experiences to showcase my inadequacies? No. Am I
just trying to encourage others to give money to people on street corners?
No. I want to show what I think happens all the time: that when eyes meet,
individuals cannot ignore each other anymore.
We know that words are important for communicating, but we forget that
eye contact does the same. Do you think that the quality of clinical care is
enhanced when we look at our patients and one another?
We are seriously engaged in the process of developing an organization that is
intent on providing our patients the highest possible level of clinical care and
service. Everyone, including the homeless, can teach us how to do that.
Improving the quality of care can come in small, quiet changes, like meeting the eyes
of patients and coworkers when all I really want to do is avoid them. I will take the
risk and meet the eyes of my coworkers and my patients today.
#d 196 D3
Holding toDuring
Our Caring Convictions
Tight Financial Times
It’s not uncommon for messages to come down from senior management
announcing a new phase of belt tightening. Anyone who has worked in
our field for any length of time has experienced the constant balancing
act that health care organizations face in treating the uninsured or
underinsured in our community while still coming up with the financial
resources to pay for staff, maintenance of equipment, growth, as well as
the operational costs associated with running a top-notch facility.
Unfortunately, when we have to function during a time of financial
constraint, we operate with an attitude of scarcity—mixed with a little fear
and anxiety associated with the loss of jobs. Employees who are challenged
to do the same job with even fewer resources than they have now, are
placed in an uncomfortable situation.
When these times arise, working harder is not an option because we’re
already tapped out. The mere suggestion that we work harder is a
turn-off and increases stress.
We can better serve ourselves and our patients if we can resist this bunker
mentality and instead, look for ways to work differently. Continuing a
tradition of caring does not always mean using up a lot of money. There
are ways to continue to care for our patients even during a period of tight
budgets. As important as money is, all of the resources in the world will
not guarantee quality care.
All of us have known colleagues who have reached into their own pockets
or gone beyond their job description to help others in need. Here’s an
#d 197 D3

example of how one of our own showed compassion, generosity and
innovative thinking toward one of his patients. One morning, we were
discharging a homeless man from the hospital. He had no shoes. A nurse
on the floor who was arranging for the patient’s discharge took off his
own new Nikes and gave them to the patient. “I’ve got another pair in my
locker.” We only found out later that not only did this nurse literally take
the shoes off his own feet to give to this homeless man, but he did so
knowing that he would be sacrificing his new pair for the older, worn out
shoes in his locker.
This nurse’s behavior is typical. Every day of the year in different
ways, employees and physicians go out of their way for patients,
usually unnoticed.
The behavior of the nurse giving away his shoes is one more hint that
we can find an opportunity to genuinely care at any moment in any
place within any organization. What we need is simply an appreciation of
others and a generous spirit. As St. Francis of Assisi reminds us, “It is in
giving that we receive.”
I will do my part to spend my organization’s money and resources wisely. I will also
look for ways to work differently, smartly and with awareness. I will find unique
ways to give.
#d 198 D3
The Saints Among Us
We tend to think of people who are a source of inspiration as saintly.
The Albert Schweitzer’s, the Florence Nightingale’s, and the Mother
Theresa’s of this world hold our deeply held values and they model the
best of what it means to be human.
Being sainted by popular acclaim, by church proclamation, or because
one is part of a nation’s history, is an extraordinary achievement that
happens to very few people. However, the world is filled with individuals
whose lives are inspirational, even though they’re not written up in the
newspaper. All we have to do is to take a second look at one another to
find someone to uplift us.
Even the most ordinary life is full of hardship. No one is immune to bad
luck, setbacks, heartache, illness and tragedy. Sometimes just to stay
afloat, function and be a decent human being can take a super-human
effort. Watch a duck serenely gliding across a pond seemingly without
effort. If you look beneath the surface, you see its little webbed feet
paddling furiously. It takes a lot of effort to make it look serene.
Once we manage to acknowledge the struggles that we have, we can
recognize this achievement in others. From there, it is only a short step
to appreciating the value, dignity, and even saintliness of people every-
where who are struggling the same way we are.
This might seem idealistic but actually looking beneath the surface has
practical value. It helps us develop tolerance and empathy, become a
#d 199 D3

better team player, and it keeps us from feeling alone with our personal
suffering. Once we have cultivated this awareness of the universality of
suffering, our shift in perspective lingers.
I will acknowledge my own triumphs and attempts to overcome struggle. I will
also acknowledge the saintliness of my coworkers and patients as I observe them
overcome their struggles.
#d 200 D3
Bringing Our Whole Selftothe Work Place
In today’s work place, we have to be sensitive to others’ faiths and beliefs;
we need to respect, not offend them. Many people believe that the
only way to avoid offense is to keep their religious beliefs and values to
themselves. There seems to be a sense that it’s dangerous, especially at
work, to express highly personal ideas that might be misinterpreted. As
the contemporary poet, David Whyte, has written, it is little wonder that
we feel we must leave part of ourselves at home when we come to work.
An example of this reluctance occurred during lunch one day. A nurse
mentioned being uncomfortable speaking about her faith because she
might seem insensitive to others at the table. She must have done a good
job keeping her beliefs a secret because the person across from her said,
“We’ve worked together for five years and I never knew you were Jewish.”
Then the office assistant at the far end of the table told all of us, for the
first time, that she was a Latter Day Saint. “But,” she added, “I keep it
to myself.” All it took was one person revealing her private truth for
the truth of others to come spilling out. And guess what? Nothing
catastrophic happened.
We do not want to create a work place where we bring only the functional
side of ourselves to work. We want to foster a work culture that supports
being whole and complete in every aspect of life. That means creating an
environment where people aren’t afraid to be visible, to discuss all facets
of themselves.
It is true that it is safer to keep our most cherished spiritual beliefs
to ourselves and remain quiet to avoid offending others. But, there’s
#d 201 D3

another way to respect others, which is to trust that sharing our beliefs
will bring us closer together, not separate us. In our conversations, we
can consciously approach others with an inquiring attitude, a readiness
to discuss, and a desire to learn. When we do, respect takes on a whole
new meaning.
I will look for ways to express myself authentically and encourage a respectful
environment for others to do the same.
#d 202 D3
It Takes a Team Reduce
to
Medical Errors
When tragic accidents happen—be they unforeseen medical errors,
aviation accidents or gigantic industrial fires—scientists, researchers and
administrators learn a lot from analyzing their root causes. They’ve
found that seldom, if ever, is a single individual at fault.
There is always a “we” that leads to the problem and the problem usually
points to a process that needs to be changed. When we are investigating
how to reduce medical errors, we must think in terms of “we” by looking
at the entire work place—people and processes—and see how weak links in
communication among team members or a gap in checks and balances
may be compromising the safety of our patients.
Sharing a common goal, like reducing medical errors or promoting
patient safety, is part of a team’s responsibility. And yet, a strong team
is made up of committed individuals who effectively communicate with
one another and contribute their unique strengths and talents toward a
common team goal. Our responsibilities as members of a team are to
speak up when we see broken processes that are jeopardizing patient
safety. Without conscientious, vigilant individual members, the team as a
whole fails. In health care, failure is tragic. A team is only as good as the
individuals in it and their ability to work well together.
You may ask, “I’m only one member of a larger team. How can I make a
difference?” For change to happen at a team level, and ultimately at an
organizational level, it must begin with us, as individual members. We
can start by creating a work culture that gives all of us the freedom to speak
out about changes that need to be made. You and I play a critical part in
#d 203 D3

creating a climate of safety within the work place. When a colleague feels
that it is not safe to speak up, we have all participated in creating this
climate. Each of us also has a role to play in changing it. If you doubt the
influence of single individuals, recall how teams change when a member
leaves or another joins.
By working together, we can create a work place that supports individuals
and teams in their efforts to improve how care is delivered and work is
done. This allows us to build a healing environment. This is not an
unreasonable ideal; it is an obligation.
I will be part of the solution and look for ways to reduce medical errors. I will
start by supporting an environment that rewards honesty and freedom to speak
one’s mind.
#d 204 D3
Two Holidays
In the spring, there are a number of religious holidays—for example,
Purim for Jews and Easter for Christians. The feast of Purim is one of
the most joyous for the Jewish people. It commemorates the time when
Esther, the most favored and stunning woman in the king’s harem,
interceded with him to save her countrymen from being massacred.
What the King did not know was that the woman he loved was a Jew. Her
disguise saved her and her people. To this day, Jewish people sometimes
don masks in carnival-like fashion to playfully reenact the memory of
escaping death. The Jewish people have an enduring trust that G-d is
protective and operates in largely unrecognized ways.
Easter is also a time of rejoicing within the Christian traditions, which
vary according to their differing understandings of the resurrection of
Jesus. However, Christians are united in their belief that the life of Jesus
is risen. I met a patient dying of complications from cancer. “I love
Easter,” he said in a labored, quiet way, “All of my life I’ve recognized that
there is something on the other side of disappointment and failure. I feel
the same about death. Jesus died and rose. That has happened to me in
little ways all through life. I feel the same as I lie here. I think that people
who talk as if tough times are the end of everything haven’t really lived.”
The spirit of Easter is something he carried with him throughout his life.
We are people with exceedingly different world views, yet one in our
humanity. Let’s help one another find time to remember the importance
and magnitude of what we are about: nothing less than a special type of
love for those entrusted to our care.
I will take the time to learn from traditions outside of my own. I will look for the
common thread of humanity that binds us together.
#d 205 D3
Practicing the Art and Science of Medi cine
The science of medicine changes constantly. We can be grateful that
we live today, not yesterday. Only a hundred years ago, if you had
tuberculosis you would likely die within a few years. The same if you had
cardiac failure. Before penicillin, thousands died from infections and
diseases that today are merely inconveniences. Our children will be
blessed to live in tomorrow’s world.
However radically the science of medicine changes from decade to
decade, the art of practicing medicine has not. Two thousand years ago,
a patient needed his physician’s healing presence just as much as he does
today. Many cultures and traditions have known for centuries the healing
qualities that come from an understanding heart and a caring hand. With
today’s machines and new technologies, this side of medical care is easily
overlooked. Patients consistently tell us that we are not quite as good
at the art of medicine as we are with its science. We must live with this
critique and change. As we do, more patients will be healed.
A nurse shared the following story:
When I was a little girl, we moved into a home we knew we would live for only a year. Yet, as
soon as we arrived, my mother started cleaning and painting as if there were no tomorrow. She
put us all to work.
“But Mom,” I said, “We are only going to be here a little time. Why are we doing this?”
Her response was simple, “We are going to leave this place a little better than we found it.”
That is what being a healing presence means—leaving others a little better
as a result of our care.
Today, I will be aware of how I can be a healing presence by extending my heart and
my hand to all I meet. I will leave my work place a little better than I found it.
#d 206 D3
Community
The Physical Medicine and Rehabilitation Department scheduled a
meeting of its entire staff this morning. Fifty employees from different
hospitals within the system were present. The meeting began in a
windowless room as the sun rose.
At the beginning of the meeting, the director of the department had
everyone stand in a circle. She then invited the new employees to step
forward and form an inner circle. She acknowledged the contributions of
each individual to the care of patients.
By doing this she awakened an undeniable feeling in all of us who were
present that we were a community of linked individuals with different
competencies and gifts. We could easily see that this department could not
function without each member’s contribution.
The community within a hospital has a special strength because it is built
around the common purpose of saving lives, healing bodies and giving
comfort. The sacred work we do allows patients to return home to watch
their grandchildren grow, gives the promise of mobility to amputees, and
sends cancer into remission for countless patients. We are, all of us, a
community of healers and we must never lose sight of that. When people
come together with a common vision to improve the health of the
community, this shared higher purpose generates its own light. The
“sunrise” in that windowless room was as real and as significant as the one
that welcomed a new day outside.
I will remember that I’m part of a community of healers. I will look for the special
energy that is created through our common purpose.
#d 207 D3
 Being Open to New Ideas
There are over 6 billion people on the planet and all of us thinks we are
“right” when we face more than one approach or way to view a situation.
This does not exactly set the stage for effective teamwork.
Yesterday, three employees were having an informal discussion in the
hallway. I knew one of the three. As I passed by, she reached out and
grabbed my arm. “Do you have a minute? We’re talking about the need to
have a welcoming spirit when working.” She was forceful enough that even
if I were busy, I would have stopped.
“We don’t think it is enough to think of it as being pleasant with one
another. We think a welcoming spirit should include welcoming the
different ways of thinking about things.”
One of the nurses asked the other, “Do you think that welcoming
another’s thought is the same as respecting another’s way of thinking?”
The third said, “No, there’s a huge leap between the two! If you simply
respect another’s perspective, you stay trapped in your own little world.
There is no real connection. If you welcome another’s way of thinking
into your own—see as they see—there is a chance that her perspective will
change you.” Then, the one who had cornered me asked, “So, what do
you think?”
in the midst of a conversation, to ask someone to explain her position
and not simply advocate for our own.
Our medical facilities serve all kinds of people from all walks of life.
When they enter our facilities, they bring their own values, perspectives
and cultural norms. If we are not open to their point of view because
we’re too locked into our own beliefs and agendas, then we are setting
ourselves up for misunderstanding. By sticking doggedly to our point of
view, we end up filtering the other person’s words and actions through
our fixed lens. As a result, we are more likely to be in conflict with those
with whom we work. However, when we relinquish our need to be “right”
all the time, we not only create a more open and welcoming environment
for patients and their families, but our personal and professional lives are
enriched as we learn more about ourselves, our work, and other cultures.
I will take in the other person’s perspective and give it true consideration. That is
how I can expand and enrich my values and life experience.

Those three nurses were speaking of a problem that philosophers have

struggled over for centuries, namely, how do we quiet our own way
of thinking long enough to genuinely understand the perspective of
another. Indians refer to this challenge when they encourage us to walk in
the moccasins of others before criticizing. That gift involves the ability,

#d 208 D3 #d 209 D3
Reflect on the ImmenseValue of Our Work
Many hospitals have a rich tradition of striving to provide the highest
quality of care. A patient’s appearance, wealth or condition should
not influence the care they receive. Our hospitals are remarkable in this
way. Many are even more extraordinary because of their dedication to
serve the poor, under-served, and disadvantaged. We do not do this to
be recognized.
We often find ourselves so taken up with our everyday responsibilities,
that we lose perspective and lose sight of the value of our work. As
this occurs, we know that it is time to step back, look at the good we’ve
done, and give ourselves credit for the contributions we’ve made to other
people’s lives and to our organization. Affirmations about the work that
we or others have done never hurt anyone. In fact, it does the reverse. By
reminding ourselves why we went into this work in the first place, we are
bound to reconnect with the passion that drew us to this sacred work.
Whatever our jobs, remember that our work directly contributes to the
immense good that our organizations provide to those in need. Together,
we make a difference.
Today, I will take time out to acknowledge the value of the work I do. I will also
recognize my coworkers for their service. Unconditional giving helps those I serve
and enriches my life in unseen ways.
#d 210 D3
Honoring Our Diversity
On Cinco de Mayo, our colleagues of Mexican ancestry gratefully
remember the courage of their parents and grandparents who resisted the
invasion of their homeland. In our country, we have turned the memory
of those heroic individuals into a boisterous holiday. Back home,
Mexican families celebrate the day more quietly.
Alongside us in cubicles, hidden in kitchens, and walking our hallways,
are phlebotomists, office assistants, nurses, electricians, physicians,
plumbers, and techs of Mexican descent. Often we don’t notice their
cultural heritage because they have adjusted so well into the American
way of life. Yet, it’s important to acknowledge it because their cultural
background is integral to who they are.
One way to celebrate this day is to offer a heartfelt smile or gesture of
appreciation to those for whom this is such an important day.
We need a varied and gifted workforce for many reasons. Most impor-
tantly, our diversity allows us to give our patients the best care. Walk
the floors of our hospitals. Notice those who frequent our offices. The
diversity is striking.
For those who celebrate this holiday, thank you. You remind us that every
person is valuable and each of us is a gift to the other.
When a particular holiday or tradition comes along, I will acknowledge it to my
coworkers and patients whom I know are celebrating. I will honor their tradition and
the richness it brings to me and to our work place.
#d 211 D3
B ecoming Quiet and Listening
to Our Heart
All of us have a quieter side where hopes and dreams, thoughts and
feelings, live within our hearts. These are likely what brought us to health
care in the first place. To “be professional,” some people feel that they
must leave this corner of themselves at the door when they come to
work. If they are too “authentic,” they fear that they’ll be viewed as less
competent. Unfortunately, leaving a part of ourselves at home can leave
us feeling detached from our work; we work in half-hearted ways. We
work better when we listen with our hearts. The patient is looking for a
nurse who can change an IV, and make a human connection.
Not only do our patients profit when we set aside a moment of quiet in
the midst of a busy day to listen to the quiet stirrings within, but so do we.
Consider giving yourself the gift of being quiet and going within—
especially on a busy day. By listening to the whisperings of your heart,
you will honor its messages and serve others in increasingly more
effective ways.
After taking time away for reflection, I will work with the energy and urges
that come from my heart. My work will come alive with the fullness of feeling
and commitment.
#d 212 D3
Being On a Mission
Military officers are “commissioned.” Health care leaders should be as
well. The word commission, similar to the word mission, is formed from
the Latin word implying someone is sent. Persons with a mission are sent
out with the authority to perform a special service. Soldiers are given
a mission and sent to carry it out. So are ambassadors. They are sent to
represent a country. They do not represent their personal interests but
act for those who sent them.
In health care, we have a distinct mission to relieve suffering and restore
hope. Our task is predictable in that we are charged with fostering the
healing of those entrusted to our care. What is uncharted is the path to
this goal.
A commissioning ceremony is an organization’s way to send individuals
on a mission. While this is not done today, we have to find ways to
commission every employee and doctor, not just the administrators.
Many leaders who have a sense of mission live with the conviction that
their work is God’s work made visible. Not everyone has that understand-
ing of the world or of his or her work. However, we all have a shared
desire to create a remarkable organization that fulfills our collective
vision. Some days we may see our work simply as a job. But, now and
again, as during a commissioning ceremony, we are invited to recognize
the idea of participating in a calling that will inspire us to create a world
that reflects our dreams.
Today, I will find a moment to appreciate the importance and sacredness of what my
work is all about.
#d 213 D3
 Overcoming Cynicism and Betrayal
The bankruptcy of the Enron Corporation made headline news. Some
asked how could a large corporation hide its problems so effectively,
collapse so quickly, and end so tragically? Others wondered, how could
a few employees make fortunes while so many lost their jobs and their
life savings? This collapse is particularly confusing because Enron, as
with many health care organizations, spoke specifically of having core
values that would shape their decisions and characterize their culture,
namely integrity, respect, communication, and excellence. Something
went terribly wrong.
When an organization violates the trust of its employees, the feeling of
betrayal runs deep. Employees lose jobs through no fault of their own,
investors lose their life savings, and the public forfeits its faith in the
marketplace. We can’t change what happened, but we can learn to hold
onto our own values irrespective of the decline of others.
an opportunity to cultivate the essential element of trust, which is
necessary to any team effort, within any organization. We have to keep our
eyes open, yes, yet we must make a conscious choice to avoid cynicism,
and be willing to trust again and again. We can choose to reaffirm the
goodness of others in order to build a unique, caring work place.
Choosing good over cynicism is an adult task requiring maturity, an
expansive world view, and a fundamental drive to follow one’s heart.
I will face the adult task of choosing to affirm the goodness of others and trust my
coworkers. Cynicism is tiring. Trust is energizing. I can take care of myself and be
trusting of others.

When we are children, we have an endearing and unexamined trust in our

world. At some point as the years unfold, that taken-for-granted trust
will be broken. Someone or something will disappoint us. At that
moment, we will know what it means to be betrayed, and yet something
inside us still wants to believe. And so we enter adulthood with a certain
naïveté, until we see again that we can be betrayed. As adults, we need
to take the extraordinary step of striking a balance between naïveté
and cynicism.

In that moment of betrayal, we can easily become disheartened.

“Everyone is greedy. You can’t trust anyone.” Whatever the circum-
stances, we tend to universalize it. If we take that stance, though, we miss

#d 214 D3 #d 215 D3
 Choosing an Attitude of Abundance
This is the holiday season. Hanukkah, the feast also known as the Festival In the stories, there seemed to be a scarcity of oil, wine, bread and fish.
of Lights, has begun. During these days, Jews will commemorate the “There’s not enough!” people cried. Then, astonishingly, there was plenty.
victory of the Maccabees, the rededication of the Temple at Jerusalem,
and the oil that miraculously burned for eight days. For Christians Do you think it makes a difference if we approach life with an attitude
around the world, this is “Advent,” a time of waiting for the moment of abundance rather than one of scarcity? Do you think it makes a differ-
when God’s presence, and a recognition of the sacredness of this world, ence in the way we work? I do. It may influence what we say and even how
are awakened. The waiting comes to fruition on Christmas Day when we respond to patients or colleagues when they ask if we have a moment.
their savior is born.
When someone asks for something, whatever that might be, use it to
With our 21st century technical savvy, it is hard to accept the seemingly reflect on the perspective from which we view the world. Abundance and
impossible notion in the Jewish legend that a day’s worth of oil can burn scarcity are not simply about wealth. They are about time and every other
for eight days. It is just as hard to accept, literally, the Christian stories quantifiable aspect of the human condition.
about a few loaves of bread and fishes multiplying enough to feed crowds
or water magically turning into wine to meet the needs of wedding guests. Am I approaching my work and my life with an attitude of abundance or scarcity? How
does my approach affect my response? I will offer more of my time and my self and
Yet, the truth underlying these stories is profound. They raise questions see how that feels.
about scarcity and abundance because they suggest that very small
resources can actually satisfy many people. These stories help us think
twice about how we approach the world. We have to wonder if small
kindnesses and acts of generosity don’t make a bigger contribution than
we imagine. If we’re operating in a mode of scarcity, we’re quick to say
no because we feel we don’t have enough to give. We are acting on an
underlying belief that there’s a finite amount of resources, and if we give
something away, there won’t be anything left for us. When we function
with an abundant mentality, we have a certain faith that when we give, we
are making an empty space to be filled by something new. In other words,
giving promotes abundance, not scarcity.

#d 216 D3 #d 217 D3
Being a HumanNotBeing,
Just a Human Doing
We think this effort will drain us even more at the end of a hard day, but
A small group of employees was sitting around a table in the cafeteria paradoxically, making contact is rejuvenating. To think that we are too
informally discussing their concerns. One of the participants was a sur- busy to make this effort is to miss out on what it means to be human.
geon who talked about a patient he had operated on several years ago. The
woman had returned to speak with him because her cancer had advanced My ability to provide healing may come in the form of listening, holding a hand, and
to a stage where current treatments, including surgery, would not work. truly accepting with an open heart, the feelings and thoughts that someone shares
He felt terrible and helpless knowing that he couldn’t do a thing for her. with me. Sometimes, after everything possible has been done, it is this human
connection that has the ultimate power to soothe.
As he spoke, it was clear to each of us listening, that the patient really did
not want him to do anything. She simply needed his presence because she
had connected with him and trusted him. It was the surgeon, used to
being helpful, who felt he needed to do something.

All of us are challenged to remember that “doing” is only one side of life.
There is another side that is harder to describe. Caught up in the everyday
world of schedules, deadlines and responsibilities, it is easy to forget the
importance of simply being present to one another. This patient, facing
mortality, knew better than her physician, the importance of being present
to one another.

At times when involved in the workaday world of health care, we can over-
look the fact that we yearn for human presence, understanding and accep-
tance. Curing (doing) is important but so is healing (being). One is not
more important than the other. Many times, curing someone is not an
option, but it’s always possible to heal if we are willing to extend ourselves.

#d 218 D3 #d 219 D3
 Making the Ordinary, Extra-Ordinary
Philosophers remind us that we are irreplaceable—one of a kind. Never In whatever “ordinary” activities you are involved on this day, think of
again, they say, will there be another you. No wonder talk of cloning doing them in “extra” ordinary ways.
makes us nervous.
Today, I will nurture a heartfelt prayer of gratitude for having a chance to express
Our uniqueness is an extraordinary fact that unnerves some, motivates my talents in a unique, irreplaceable way. I will reflect on what it means to be
others, and has the ethicists wondering. Because we are one of a kind, and irreplaceable, and the responsibility I have to live this life with passion, grace and
never fully aware of the persons we are called to be, the Spanish philoso- commitment to be the best I can be. I will attempt to do my “ordinary” activities in
pher Miquel de Unamuno believes that we need to live with such passion an extra-ordinary way.
that when we die, others will feel that we should not have died precisely
because “no one else can fill the gap that will be left.” In order to live up
to our potential with such passion, we must be aware of our unique
qualities. We cannot fully express that which we have not acknowledged.

If you have a difficult time thinking of yourself as that irreplaceable,

take a moment to assume it is true. This may require living “as if.”
From there, it is a short step to begin doing ordinary things in “extra”
ordinary ways. By doing ordinary tasks—nursing care, lab work, clean-
ing, preparing food, typing letters, maintaining accounts, ordering
supplies—in extraordinary ways, we are shaped into the persons we are
called to be. That is almost always more than we imagine.

What is true for individuals is equally so for organizations. They are

similarly irreplaceable. While constantly being formed, changing, and
dying, organizations have histories and identities. If a hospital can
realize the unique role it plays in a community, it is challenged to
become the organization that has been envisioned. Health care is not
merely a business venture; it has a call and responsibility to become the
organization that the community needs.

#d 220 D3 #d 221 D3
 Having a Shared Vision
Is having a vision as important for individuals as it is for organizations?
One of our colleagues is a young Native American Ute. Her family had
no money. From childhood, she has been overcoming significant
obstacles like epilepsy and family poverty. However, from the time she was
a child, her mother had her read and reread this short poem.
Good, better, best. Never let it rest
Until our good is better, and our better is the best!
Not only is she our colleague, she is also our teacher, because no matter
what happened, she never took her eye off her goal to achieve her absolute
best. Even when her path led her into muddy patches, she knew it was part
of her journey and she never lost sight of her destination and never lost
total faith in her ability to succeed. Deep down, she knew she could—and
would—make it, despite the detours, the missteps, and the setbacks.
We all internalize messages from our parents and manifest them
throughout our lives. “Rebecca” probably received a lot of messages
from her mother—as we all do—but this poem is the one that really took
root for her, partly because she sensed how her mother cherished this
philosophy. Just as Rebecca embraced her mother’s vision, we do the same.
A shared vision is powerful, and when it is about excelling, organizations
can make breakthrough results when they are focused on achieving clinical
excellence. By being forever mindful of the vision we hold for ourselves,
we, too, are destined to achieve the very greatness we have imagined.
What are my inner messages? If the ones I have are not leading me to greatness, I
will create and adopt new ones. I believe in the power of a shared vision.
#d 222 D3
The Life and Death Value of Teamwork
Some time ago, we had a seriously ill patient who was in his sixties. He
wasn’t a citizen and he did not speak English. He had been admitted to
the hospital a few months earlier, received treatment, and then released.
I was informed that his debilitating illness would take his life within a year
or two.
A few days ago, he arrived in the emergency room, and I received a call
to assist at his admission. He hadn’t eaten for days and he appeared to
be in severe pain, so much, in fact, that he could not be touched. From
his disheveled appearance, we concluded that he had not been receiving
proper care at home. The patient stayed all day at home alone. His
brothers looked after him when they returned from work. A 9-year-old
neighbor looked in on him during the day. They were probably all doing
the best they could, but clearly, it wasn’t enough. The man suffered
unnecessarily and the lack of treatment weakened his condition.
The case manager’s challenge was determining how to arrange for care at
home so he could live out his days in relative comfort.
Technically, once this patient was stabilized, he should have been
discharged. However, if we did that, we would be sending him back into
the deteriorating situation that had led to his hospitalization. Should we
do it? The man was Mexican. Should he be sent back to his homeland
where he had no family and no medical care available?
The physician, using the abilities of a particularly sensitive translator,
was able to develop a realistic plan to take care of the patient’s needs
following his hospitalization. The physician and translator went above
#d 223 D3
and beyond the usual call of duty by bringing in social workers, church
volunteers, and others who were familiar with his cultural and religious
heritage. All of these people worked cooperatively to build a comprehen-
sive plan to ensure he would receive the food, housing and medical atten-
tion he needed to live comfortably. In health care, we often see how our
ability to act as a well-functioning team has life-and-death consequences.
Most people never see the kind of comprehensive and thoughtful care
that this patient received, yet it goes on every day. Unfortunately, we also
have examples where teamwork is absent. As a result, patients suffer. We
usually don’t think of the janitor as playing a part, but what if a patient
had an unusually low white cell count and the floor of his room wasn’t
washed for a few days? What if no one told the janitor this, and his work
caused the patient to catch a life-threatening cold? What if nobody told
the dietician to withhold solid food before surgery and the patient
suffered as a result?
To build and sustain a culture of teamwork, each of us must do our part.
We must remain consciously committed to open, two-way communica-
tion, value the role we play so that we play it to the best of our ability, and
accord equal importance and respect to other members of the team, those
who prepare food, ready the rooms, maintain the electrical system, and
stack the pharmacy shelves. All these jobs might seem less important than
the physician’s and nurse’s work, yet every one of us is needed and is con-
nected to the care of patients. We are partners.
I will look at my teammates with a refreshed sense of appreciation. I will be more
aware of being a positive contributor to my team and try to work together for the
highest and best outcome for all.

Whenever there is an airplane crash and ensuing investigation, the final

report always lists a series of errors that lead to the crash, seldom a single
mistake. It is the same with hospitals. Think of a pyramid-shaped build-
ing made of children’s wooden blocks. Even after one or two blocks have
been removed, the pyramid may still look structurally sound. But keep
removing the blocks and eventually, the structure will cave in. Sometimes
there is a quick collapse, and at other times, there is slow crumbling. But
create enough gaps in the building and eventually, it will fall. To keep that
from happening, teamwork and excellent communication are required.

#d 224 D3 #d 225 D3
 R especting Inner Struggles
A nurse and former colleague ended her life last week. Death—especially
suicide—shakes us because it seems to go against every need we have to
nurture and preserve life. The fact that this nurse’s death was unexpected
made it all the more unsettling. All of us wondered if we could have done
more to support her.
Everyone struggles. All of us live closer to the edge than we are aware, and
it takes surprisingly little to push us off. A sudden death, a financial blow,
a spurned love are enough. Sometimes it may seem as if death is the only
option. That’s how this nurse may have felt. We don’t know. We do know
that we were her colleagues for a short time as she struggled to discern how
she could best use her talents as a nurse. She did confide in others that
emergency medicine was not the best place for her. Perhaps working with
people in crisis added a layer of stress that made it impossible for her to
find a reason to live.
We all have two sides: professional and personal. Revealing to coworkers
our deeply held personal fears seems oddly inappropriate, despite the
enormous investment of time and energy we devote to one another at
work. Yet, as inner pressures build and the dissonance grows between our
inner emotional life and our outer appearance, isolation grows.
Suicide is a lonely act of desperation. We can’t force someone to reveal
their inner pain, but we can provide an opening and create a receptive
environment to lighten their suffering. The simple act of sharing is a way
to care, yet it provides no answer to the questions suicide raise.
Today, I will say a little prayer for those who have taken their lives. I will remember
that everyone has a side hidden from view.
#d 226 D3
WTraditions
hat Can the Great Religious
Teach Us About Health Care?
Working within health care, it is easy to forget what is happening outside
the world of our work place. If we were looking at ourselves from outer
space, we would notices millions of people in motion. It is fall and they
are celebrating. As we take a closer look, we can see what these great
traditions can teach us.
The Jewish community is celebrating Rosh Hashanah. During these ten
days of penance, they acknowledge their failings, ask pardon of G-d, and
promise to turn again toward others with love. For sins against another
person (rather than G-d), they must first seek reconciliation with the
offended person and, if possible, right the wrongs committed. For the
Jewish people, this is one of their holiest seasons.
The Muslim community is celebrating Ramadan, which involves a month
of fasting during daylight hours. When evening falls, they are drawn
closer to one another as they eat sparingly with family and friends. During
this holiday within Muslim countries, many persons, particularly the
young, line the roads to offer water and fruit to those passing by. The
practice of offering food to others while hungry oneself, is another way to
remember to put others’ needs and comfort ahead of one’s own. That is
curiously close to what we do when we go out of our way to create a
welcoming spirit within our organizations.
This week, the Christian community the world over has celebrated the
Feast of Francis from Assisi. It is startling that this man is admired almost
a thousand years after his death. His appeal lies in his reverence. He
recognized that all of creation—the sun, moon, every living creature, and
#d 227 D3
each person—were his sisters and brothers. Most of us remember this happen if we thought of ourselves as “instruments of healing?” How
prayerful sentiment: Grant that we may not so much seek to be consoled would such a realization impact the way we relate to others, whether
as to console; to be understood as to understand; to be loved as to love. patients or colleagues?

All three of these holidays offer valuable insights we can take to work. Today, I will take a moment to reflect on the larger events taking place outside of my
Rosh Hashanah suggests that all of us make mistakes and it underscores work life. I will respect others’ traditions and honor my own.
the importance of reviewing our actions, asking for forgiveness when we
fall short, forgiving ourselves, and forgiving others when they hurt us.
While asking for forgiveness may be a humbling experience, it doesn’t
have to be a humiliating one. Instead, it allows us to feel a sense of
closure on what was a hurtful situation, learn from it and move on.

The celebration of Ramadan supports our awareness of the importance of

giving to others. While Muslims practice this by giving away food, we can
draw from this practice by understanding that in health care, we are
offering a service and giving of ourselves. There is great value in putting
others’ needs ahead of our own.

Through the celebration of the Feast of Francis of Assisi, the Christian

community expresses the importance of recognizing the deeper connec-
tion that we all have with one another. It is through this understanding
that we can better serve others. If we can recognize this truth, we can
more easily listen to others and more effectively respond to their needs.
In other words, we become better practitioners, more effective team
players, and more supportive coworkers. Francis devoutly wanted to be
an “instrument” of peace. He was. Because of his words, his presence
and his actions, his legend lives on today, and people are still influenced
by his ways. Given our mission to foster healing and health, what would

#d 228 D3 #d 229 D3
 Seeing Beyond Stereotypes
For a fleeting moment after 9-11, the country was united as if it was one
small community mourning its dead. The legacy of that day is perhaps
a greater appreciation of life and of one another. We recognize that life
is a gift.
For those who think misfortune could never happen to them, consider
some of the homeless people standing in line for free meals at parishes
around the country that serve thousands of meals every day. Many of them
are women and children. If statistics hold true, some of our fellow
employees might actually be homeless; they keep it hidden.
You and I are blessed to live in relative security. It’s not just that we have
a roof over our heads, but we have meaningful work. Our challenge is to
avoid feeling entitled.
As we go about our day, we can help ourselves, and each other, by taking
a second look at those we meet, particularly patients and strangers. We
will not be privy to their life circumstances. We will not even know if they
are homeless. Yet a second glance provides an opportunity to move
beyond stereotypes to see one another as individuals, not as “them.” This
is a priceless gift we give to others and to ourselves.
Today, I will see the people I work with and care for as individuals. I will be grateful
for the lessons they teach me and enriched by their presence.
#d 230 D3
How Feverish Activity Keeps Us
from Practicing the Art of Caring
Often we are lured into the notion that by simply being busy, efficient,
and technically proficient we are doing enough. But that doesn’t neces-
sarily mean we are bringing a healing presence to our patients and to
one another.
For centuries, philosophers and those in the behavioral sciences observed
that feverish activity was actually a symptom of being uninvolved, even
though it would seem to indicate over-involvement. Surprisingly, they
also found that a person who is truly engaged in an activity does not rush.
For example, researchers noticed that little children entering a museum
lobby were restless, noisy and difficult to control. When the same
children moved from the lobby into the galleries where there were
interesting objects to see, they became noticeably less fidgety. They would
stop for a moment and then move slowly toward the objects they were
attracted to. Their parents did not have to constrain them as they did
in the lobby. Researchers came to the conclusion that the children
slowed down because they were engaged.
Do you think the world of art has something to teach us about the art of
caring? Beyond taking a pulse, replacing an IV, or handing out a pill, we
have to pause long enough to recognize the patient as a person in pain,
crisis, or in need of our help. This process cannot be rushed. Whenever
we hurry, the art of caring is difficult. We may be efficient but what was
the patient’s experience?
The nature of our work—one that gives us meaning and makes what we
do so important—is the person-to-person activity. In order for one
#d 231 D3

individual to make a real connection with another, the process cannot
move like a fast-food line. The temptation is always to speed up in an
effort to check more things off the to-do list, but we must resist it and
slow down enough to do things right. In those timeless moments of
connection, we must honor the art of what we do. While it may sound
idealistic, perhaps we all need to become artists.
Today, I will notice how a slower pace affects the quality of my work. I will see if I
can accomplish what I need to, even while working at a slower pace.
#d 232 D3
Making it Personal
In hospitals, it’s not that uncommon to hear the patient in Room 302
referred to as the “kidney failure case,” or one in Room 410 referred to
as the “heart transplant.” It’s understandable that with all of the human
heartbreak and suffering we see daily, we tend to protect ourselves from
burnout by distancing ourselves and detaching from our patients.
Notwithstanding, our work is deeply personal.
One aspect of providing excellent patient care is making patients feel like
they are being treated with respect. We do this by making a conscious
effort to be particularly sensitive to each patient. It means treating every-
one as if he or she were a friend or member of our family. There is little
need to share our personal lives with patients but we do need to be
personable. When we see patients as individuals rather than a “kidney
transplant,” we will treat them with respect.
For those of us who do not work directly with patients, look for ways to
bring a level of respect and sensitivity to our colleagues by being polite,
professional and caring—one person at a time, one situation at a time.
Today, I will make a conscious effort to treat everyone I meet with respect. I will
grow from this experience professionally and personally.
#d 233 D3
 Learning from Astronauts
Do you remember sitting in silence watching the memorial service for
Columbia’s astronauts who died when the shuttle exploded over Texas?
The President quoted the wife of the Israeli astronaut who said that her
husband was at the peak of his career, doing what he wanted, with the
people he loved. She, and all those who loved these astronauts, could at
least take some comfort in the fact that they died doing what they loved. I
remember the words of Commander Husband; “Being an astronaut isn’t
a job for me, it’s a passion.” The loss of the Columbia led many to reflect
on the value of having dreams and the importance of contributing to a
project that is larger than any one of us.
During the memorial service, current and former astronauts expressed
the idea that they and their families were engaged in exploring the
universe, and despite its risks, the exploration was well worth taking. They
were vocal and explicit about their belief in the sacredness of creation, of
what they are about, and the value of their work. We can honestly assume
the same view, even though our names won’t go down in history.
Today, I will reflect on why I joined the health care profession. I will rekindle the love
and passion I have for my work.

In a moment of quiet, we can see the parallels between the loss of

Columbia and our work within health care. Seven astronauts lost their
lives when something unplanned and unforeseen went terribly wrong.
Patients also die unexpectedly. Life can end in an instant. Any idea of
control that we might have is fleeting. We also note that astronauts work
in a certain way; they know that each day can be their last. Think of the
passion and aliveness we would feel if we brought this attitude into our
work each day. Our lives are not in immediate jeopardy because of the
work that we do, but if, as we treated each patient, we carried with us an
awareness of the fragility of life, think of how that would heighten the
quality of our interactions. If we stayed mindful of the importance of the
work that we do and of our unique ability to perform it, if we deeply
carried with us the notion that we are truly making a life-altering
contribution to our patients, their family, friends and the community
in which we live, think of how much more fulfilling and satisfying our
work would be.

#d 234 D3 #d 235 D3
 Making the Tough Decision to Leave
This morning, our CEO announced his resignation. He had accepted
an invitation to be the chief executive of another well-known hospital
system. Whenever a colleague chooses to leave, some of us might feel
betrayed. We trusted him in his leadership role and believed him as he
inspired us to invest our energy, ideas and efforts to reach shared goals
for our organization. Others may feel particularly disappointed because
that person is such a strong and attractive leader. “We placed our hope in
him.” Or, we might not be disappointed in his performance as a leader,
but feel abandoned by his decision to leave. We trusted his commitment
to the organization and now he’s chosen to leave. Or, we may feel
insecure about his reasons for leaving; does he know something we don’t
know about our organization’s future? Is he abandoning ship and should
we polish up our resumés, too?
All of these musings are fodder for talk around the break room where
gossip is frequent. The fact is, unless we talk to the person or know her
well, we really don’t know why someone chooses to make the change. We
can take the edge off some of our concerns by considering the perspec-
tive of the person leaving. It is helpful to remember that people often
make these hard decisions for personal reasons that overshadow the
potential fallout that their absence will have on the organization or us,
their colleagues and coworkers.
Clearly, this man’s decision was not an easy one. On the one hand, we
have seen his commitment to the hospital, its patients, physicians and
employees. His investment is undeniable: we’ve felt his passion, we’ve
observed his drive to set the course for our organization in a positive
direction. He will not be around to see the fruits of many of his initia-
#d 236 D3
tives and hard work, and changing jobs means starting all over again.
On the other hand, the invitation to lead one of the country’s leading
hospitals is not only attractive, but also something of a calling. Perhaps
he felt that he had contributed all he could here and it was time to bring
his talents to another organization that needed his help. Pulled
between the two, it is easy for us see the conflict he experienced. By
understanding his perspective and recognizing that there may be a lot
of reasons for someone to leave a job, our sense of disappointment will
settle to one of sadness at his leaving, and compassion for his decision.
Anyone who is in a leadership position (which includes all of us, since
we influence others regardless of our place on the organization chart)
may take some comfort in remembering that successful leaders are not
effective because they lead others to become dependent on them. On the
contrary, they awaken the leadership in the people whom they have
inspired, and empower them to join in their cause.
So, while a CEO’s decision to leave may have some unique aspects to it,
each of us has faced similar conflicts and personal challenges at different
times in our lives: the need to live with personal integrity when faced with
life-altering decisions. Our choices please many and disappoint some,
and awaken intense feelings in others. No wonder philosophers say that
an inevitable loneliness accompanies those who strive to move on even
when others will be disappointed or disapproving. But a person who has
his own sense of mission knows he must follow it. It takes integrity to stay
on our own path. Intuitively, in spite of the disappointment, we recog-
nize and value those who develop this depth of spirit precisely because
they are willing to pay the cost of making painful decisions.
#d 237 D3

One philosopher reminds us that we grow in stature and wisdom not
when we must choose between good and bad, but when we must choose
between two goods.
I will respect the decision that a coworker makes to leave my organization. I will also
make my decisions with integrity and follow my calling.
Infusing Our Work with Gratitude
There are many blessings that we take for granted: the comfort of family
and friends, the freedom that comes with good health, and the security of
having a stable job. The sentiment of gratitude is generated when we
reflect on these blessings.
Each of us is a reason for all of us to be thankful. Almost all employees
are genuinely grateful for the people they work with, yet we seldom
express it. Today is a time to do so.

Why? Kindness and sensitivity to others are sentiments that gather

gradually to form a climate conducive to healing. By becoming a healing
presence to one another, we avoid burnout, and create a sustainable,
nourishing, and enriching place to work.

I will express my gratitude to my coworkers today. I will help create a healing

environment wherever I am.

#d 238 D3 #d 239 D3
 Giving the Gift of Ourselves
Tomorrow is the eve of Christmas. While we scurry for last-minute gifts,
we can smell the anticipation in the air. Children can hardly contain
their enthusiasm as they wait for the presents they hope to receive and give
hand-made treasures to loved ones. As adults, we treasure a hand-made
gift from a child who has not yet learned the need to buy gifts.
The gift you give will likely have immense value because it reflects the extra
effort you’ve made to do something uniquely supportive, with no appar-
ent immediate return for yourself. The special-ness comes from knowing
that you’ve gifted that person with a positive, lasting feeling of being seen,
remembered and valued.

We can learn from children just as we learn from our patients. Both Today I will be spontaneous, thoughtful and soulful in my gift giving.
remind us that many valuable gifts are not purchased. It is easy to over-
look the fact that we can be gifts to each other, and that in fact, the gifts
that come from the heart, that are crafted and delivered after much
thought about the special needs of the recipient, have far more value than
the priciest item bought from the trendiest boutique. When we receive a
gift that reflects the giver’s generosity of time, heart and thoughtfulness,
we know it, and we are warmed to the core. What makes these gifts so
special is that they respond to the specific, real needs of the person, and
aren’t just a quick-grab, off-the-shelf obligatory purchase.

What kind of priceless gifts can we give today? Maybe it’s making
an unexpected phone call that reawakens fond memories, or voicing a
genuinely felt goodbye to a patient at the end of a long day, or showing
our appreciation to colleagues. If you do not know how to go about this,
think of what you could give if you had no money. Think about what
your coworkers or patients could use at that moment—something that
would lift their spirits, make their day.

#d 240 D3 #d 241 D3
 Bringing Artistic Passion to Our Work
Health care professionals feel the need to improve patient care.
Sometimes we feel so pressured and are moving so fast that it is difficult
to hear the calmer voices and give ourselves this moment of pause.
Another reflection, Work Differently, Not More, suggested that “working harder”
was not the solution. A more effective approach is to reflect on our
dreams when we entered health care. Another way is to look at our work
in an artistic way.
While we may not think of ourselves as artists, we are. Artists beautify the
world, help us see in new ways, and make the world a better place in which
to live. Isn’t that what we do?
I read a nurse’s note on a patient’s chart this morning. It was a master-
piece; clear, accurate, detailed, and informative. I needed some office
supplies the other day and entered the supply closet, which was neatly
organized and stocked with every item I was looking for. Some unsung
artist had taken the time to keep them available, accessible and artfully
arranged so I could quickly find what I wanted in no time. I walk down
a hallway and into our lobby on marble floors that are polished
and sparkling clean. Looking over to the building’s doorway, I see an
entry that is tracked with water and dirt from the fresh snow—clearly the
“before picture” of the now-sparkling floors I am walking on. The fellow
mopping and polishing those floors creates a masterpiece even if no one
notices, knowing that the shine will last only until morning when it has to
be done again. He, too, is an artist, and he works with same sense of
impermanence as the artist who creates a Tibetan sand painting: taking
enormous time and energy to envision and execute an elaborate design,
#d 242 D3
and an extraordinary level of work to arrange, knowing that the beautiful
colored sand will be in disarray tomorrow with one gust of wind. On every
floor, within every office, behind every computer, there are artists. Those
who think of themselves as artists, approach their responsibilities a little
differently than others who are just trying to get through the day.
Let’s look at how an actual artist views his own work. The Smithsonian ran
an interesting study of creative and productive individuals. They featured
a short interview with Tony Bennett, the 79-year-old, 12 Grammy Award
winning, popular vocalist. In addition to singing, he loves to paint. One
of his works hangs in the Smithsonian Museum. When asked about
painting, he remarked, “My whole life I’ve been painting every day. I’ve
been blessed with the fact that as far back as I can remember, I’ve always
had a passion to sing and paint. I do both, and I don’t consider it work!”
This is how we can all think about our work. Do what is counterintuitive
in stressful, busy times: take a step back, prioritize the to-do list, stay
focused on a vision, and then tap into an artistic passion and energy.
Today, I will bring an artist’s perspective and creative energy to my work. I will try
to slow down, reduce my stress, reevaluate my priorities and bring more passion to
my work. Maybe I won’t even consider what I do as work!
#d 243 D3
 Facing the Questions that Death Brings
Last week, we were saddened by the sudden death of our colleague, Martha.
The fact that she died so unexpectedly contributed to our bewilderment.
Members of her department arranged a sensitive memorial service. I will
not forget the faces of her children. Who can fathom the unexpressed
feelings of a 13-year old daughter who has just lost her mother? Who could
be untouched seeing her teenage son sitting stoically?
I had lunch with an employee who was affected by this woman’s death even
though she only knew her in a limited way. They merely attended the same
meetings on occasion. Here’s what she told me:
I noticed that when we had a meeting this week, the chair in which Martha sat was empty.
It seemed no one wanted to sit in it. I also noticed that during the meeting, we picked up with
the work that had to be done. Martha’s absence didn’t slow us down. I don’t think people are
callous. They were affected by her death, but they kept their feelings to themselves. This was the
time for work.
I couldn’t help thinking, “If I died, would these people continue on as if nothing happened?”
The whole experience made me wonder if I am really as valuable to the organization as I
think I am.
She appeared to be questioning whether or not all the hours we devote
to work are worth it if the void of our death can be filled so easily. She and
her colleagues seemed to place more of an emphasis on getting things done
rather than acknowledging a coworker. Was this a balanced perspective?
#d 244 D3
I also told myself, “We’ve got to find a way to have a more balanced way of seeing this.” I found
myself thinking about life in general, that if I lived a more balanced life, I had to wonder if I
would work as hard as I do now. I don’t like thinking that way because I am really committed
to the effort to become the best at what we do.
As she thought about it, she second-guessed her decision not to attend
the memorial service on Saturday afternoon, yet she really couldn’t make
it. She looked for a solution that would help people like her who were
caught between two important choices.
This led me to think that I would appreciate a hospital-wide celebration or memorial service
now-and-again during work hours because then I wouldn’t have to choose between work and
remembering a colleague, which are both equally important, but in different ways. I only knew
Martha in passing. Martha’s death is making me think that we are missing something if we don’t
have a way to acknowledge significant events in our lives. Death is surely one of those.
Perhaps it is actually easier for some people to just work harder than to
face the death of someone who has worked among them. However, by
doing that, we are left with a feeling that something significant is missing.
When someone we know dies, rather than avoid the thoughts and
feelings that surface, we can embrace them and allow ourselves to open to
a new perspective that death invites us to consider.
I will embrace the large questions that death suggests I examine. Facing them allows
me to enrich my life experience.
#d 245 D3
 B elieving Is Seeing
When one of our seasoned employees learned of this year’s goal to
improve patient satisfaction, she quipped, “Can’t be done. I’ll believe it
when I see it.” She lives by the maxim “seeing is believing.” If they reach
the goal, then she’ll believe the goal was reachable. She was standing back
as an observer, not a participant.
In newspaper accounts of Lance Armstrong’s remarks about the attitude
needed to excel, he says, “It’s a question of believing.” If he hadn’t had
an extraordinary belief in his own capacity, he would never have driven
himself to win the Tour de France a record seven times in a row. Instead
of embracing a wait-and-see attitude, he was inclined to first believe in
what might be, and then to tenaciously work to make that dream a reality.
Believing in the goodness of others, the value of caring, the importance of
our jobs, and the sacredness of our work, helps us to work towards those
ideals. It means we can summon the energy to achieve them and become
the organization we envision. All of this calls for a remarkable faith.
Those we admire have known this all their lives. Think of Martin Luther
King Jr.’s sentiment when he set out to follow a seemingly unreach-
able dream, “Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the
whole staircase.”
I will create the work place I desire by visualizing it and taking the first step toward
this new reality. I will replace disbelief with action.
#d 246 D3
Acting with Gratitude
Look around. There is plenty to be grateful for. Look with the eyes of
gratitude, and we will find more and more to appreciate. Operating with
gratitude refreshes our perspective and it takes what was once routine and
tedious and makes it come alive.
Gratitude does something to the human heart. Rather than withdraw to
protect our blessings, we experience an awakened sense of responsibility
and a desire to be of help to others. When we live with gratitude, every act
is influenced.
In the hospital, gratitude helps us see every patient as a gift. Each one
provides us with an opportunity to practice our skills and to stretch us
emotionally. We express our gratitude through our interactions and
through the quality of care. At the end of the day, we can be eternally
grateful that we have fulfilling work.
Today, I will make a gratitude list. I will be gratefully aware of the gifts that come
from my patients, coworkers and others who come into my life.
#d 247 D3
 Living the Life We’ve Been Given
The hospital chapel was overflowing with people attending the memorial When somebody dies, it tends to draw the living into a reflective mood.
service for one of our IT employees. How had they been able to arrange We find a minute to draw apart for a while and recognize the arc of
their work to make time for the service? How could so many employees our own lives. Then we return to the work at hand with an increased
know a man who worked in a cubicle except for the rare times he left it to appreciation of its value, as well as its sacredness.
assist others with their computer problems?
How will I be remembered when I die? How I am as a person today is the legacy I will
The numbers were so striking that I could not resist asking them why leave when I’m gone.
they had come. Their answers were remarkably similar. They wanted to
be there because they had such a heart-felt connection to him. Many
employees used the same three words: he was pleasant, competent and
responsible. I was struck by the emphasis placed on his being pleasant
because a person who works in IT is usually under considerable
pressure to fix problems immediately, which doesn’t put most people in
a very “pleasant” mood. Dealing daily with demanding clients requires
an extraordinarily calm, patient manner. As to his competencies and
reliability, one manager said, “If you asked him to do something, you
could be sure he would follow through. In the department we used to
say, ‘Don’t worry, Ennis is on it.’”

Ennis died unexpectedly and young. Perhaps the ancient Greek philoso-
phers were right when they taught:

There is not a short life or a long life.

There is only the life that you have,
And the life you have is the life you are given,
the life you work with.
It has its own shape, describes its own arc, and is perfect.

#d 248 D3 #d 249 D3
 Finding Meaning in Volunteerism
Why would a 40-year old lawyer in the midst of a busy practice volunteer
her time so consistently?
Why does a state official volunteer weekly to visit patients in one of
our hospitals?
We have a completely voluntary Board of Directors. Why do those
remarkably successful women and men volunteer their time without
any compensation?
Why did one of our employees raise $25,000 dollars for an inner city
health clinic by finding individuals to sponsor her climb up one of
Europe’s highest peaks?
Why do some of our physicians volunteer their services to hospitals and
clinics in developing countries year after year? Not only do they forego
their income from work at home, but they pay their own way to those far
away countries.
Why does one of our nurses work six months in Africa and six months in
one of our emergency rooms? Why does another nurse volunteer her
time after work (along with her teenage children) to paint rooms in the
city’s largest homeless shelter?
Do people who contribute to developing nations do so because they want to
travel and see the world? If they wanted that, they could take a cruise ship.
#d 250 D3
Are those in our own town who reach out to others in remarkably gener-
ous ways merely condescending do-gooders proud of their generosity?
Not likely.
In the spirit of volunteerism, we recognize that the whole world is our
family, and we open our hearts to tend to them as we would our own chil-
dren. Not only is it the right thing to do, it fills a void in us, too. There
is a deep human need for meaning and connectedness and knowing that
you can make a unique contribution to people you may never meet again.
The poet Gerard Manley Hopkins was right when he wrote that within the
human heart lives a “dearest freshness.”
The physician, Albert Schweitzer, also made it clear when he said that
what he did with his life was not unique. Here’s what he had to say:
“You may think it is a wonderful life my wife and I have in the equatorial jungle. That is
merely where we happen to be. But you can have a still more wonderful life by staying where
you happen to be and putting your soul to the test in a thousand little trials, and winning
triumphs of love. Such a career of the spirit demands patience, devotion, daring. It calls for
strength of will and determination to love: the greatest test of a man. But in this hard ‘second
job’ is to be found the only true happiness.”
I will look for ways to make a contribution that will help other people. It is not as
important for others to see my efforts, as it is for me to help those in need. I will be
a happier person, too.
#d 251 D3
Reflecting on Life and“Show
How We
Up” for Work
behavior say about how you feel about life, love, service and caring? Are
The end of the year is a natural time for reflection. How did the year, these the messages you want to convey? There are people who really do
month, week, or day go for us? What were our successes? Did we meet have a good heart, but their crabby disposition keeps others from seeing
life’s challenges with grace or could we improve our responses to disap- it. You may know that you have a good heart and that you are a caring
pointment, stress and upheaval? person, but is it showing? Sometimes only deep contemplation will reveal
to you a painful truth about whether or not there is a disconnect between
In centuries past, monks would stop their daily activities at the end of your inner desire to be a caring person and the personality quirks that
each year and “retreat” for three days to take stock. They thought long and seep out because you are too tired, too stressed, and too overwhelmed. A
hard about the shortness of life. This was not a morbid practice where regular routine of reflection can help us realign our inner desire with our
they became preoccupied with death. Instead, reflecting on the passing of outer expression at work.
time awakened an appreciation of life and helped them regain perspective
on their lives as monks. What do I need to do differently to be a true expression of my values? Regular
reflection will become a part of my life. I am grateful for my life and hopeful about
While being a monk carries its own difficulties, it does present the the future.
luxury of being free from many of the burdens that householders and
employees have to carry—paying bills, replacing the blown-up
microwave, handling the complexity of intimate relationships, juggling
equally demanding priorities, making our way through traffic, waiting in
line for everything when there’s not enough time for anything. When
you’re a monk, your whole focus can be on reflection. When you live in
the world, however, you have to carve out the time for reflection and
make a conscious choice to do it. In spite of the innate difficulties, it’s
important to make this a priority. Pulling back a little from our daily
activities can help us re-appreciate the richness of our life, and how
we’ve changed emotionally and even spiritually since our last “check in.”

Take some time to step back from your daily activities and review your
life, especially how you “show up” for work. What does your attitude and

#d 252 D3 #d 253 D3
 Updating Our Labels
Several years ago when I was a practicing psychologist, I had the privilege
to be invited into a monastery as a consultant. The abbot wanted help
on how to deal with a problem. Some time ago, one of the monks had
decided to leave the monastery to return to lay life. He had been a baker
for almost ten years. The abbot said that he always thought of the man as
someone who had quite limited talents and that working in the kitchen
was about the only job he could do well.
The abbot had to question himself. The man he thought of as “limited”
started his own bakery after leaving the monastery. One bakery soon
became two, then five, and finally twelve. From there, he was recruited to
run an established regional bakery. Three years later, he became CEO of
a national chain.
The abbot said, “Inside these walls, I think we put one another in boxes.
I can’t help thinking something is wrong with the way I treated him.” He
realized the limitations he was placing not only on other people, but on
himself. While this awareness was not a comfortable one, it was his wake-
up call to change.
the last thing we want to do is lose valuable, motivated, and talented
people. We must create an environment where all valued employees can
live up to their potential.
But there is another victim in this judging game: us. When we prejudge
people, we hardly realize that we also place restrictions on ourselves. We
are not only confining the “boxed” person’s ability to contribute, but we
are restricting the gifts or results that we and our organization can receive
from that person. The wise person learns to think twice about everyone
and everything.
I will look at my coworkers with fresh eyes and see the new gifts they embody. I will
also let go of the box I’ve built around myself, try new things, offer new ideas and be
all that I can be.

The monk was so much more than a baker. Perhaps that is why he left the
monastery. Few can tolerate being in a box for long.

All of us tend to put people in boxes. When we do this, the person being
judged must ultimately leave the situation in order to have the freedom to
live up to his potential and feel valued. In building a thriving organization,

#d 254 D3 #d 255 D3
R eflecting on Ourin Lives
and Outside of Work
Around our national holidays like Memorial Day and Independence Day,
we think of the price of freedom: the loss of life that others sacrificed so
that we may be free to pursue our passions in our free time.
Social researchers remind us that whatever we do outside of work finds its
way into how we work. One of our employees sings in the chorus of our
city’s symphony orchestra. Others take time to walk quietly before the
workday begins. Some jog or work out in another way. Others meditate,
read an inspiring book, play an instrument or work with clay. While we
can’t measure the impact any of this has on our work, outside interests
bring a renewed energy to the workday.
There is value in living with intention and cultivating interests outside of
work. Everyone profits, including our patients and colleagues. They know
the difference between those who go about their work mechanically and
those who bring a healing presence. And we know that when we find ways
to live a balanced life, we will also work in a balanced way.
How do I spend my life outside of work? I will look for ways to enrich my outside life
and to live and work more deliberatively. My life is richer when I take time to reflect
on it and then live it with greater awareness.
#d 256 D3
Using Performance toAssessments
Improve Ourselves
When an organization is undergoing a review by the Joint Commission,
everyone feels the increased energy and the apprehension as outsiders
assess performance. Whether JCAHO does a review on our organization,
or our boss reviews our job performance, most people don’t look forward
to the process. It tends to make them nervous. They may feel judged or
simply apprehensive about facing an evaluation. That’s understandable.
Nevertheless, we have to remember that this process isn’t meant to make
us feel like a child being called into the principal’s office. It is just one
part of the important process of continual improvement. We can’t change
for the better unless we are open to learning and honest feedback, and to
the possibility that our feelings may be hurt.
There are ways to prepare for a performance review. Try setting aside time
to reflect honestly, with some measure of detachment, on the past year’s
accomplishments and shortfalls. Writing helps clarify and objectify
lessons to be learned. What was accomplished? Where did we fail? Where
is there room for improvement? After looking back, look forward. What
would we like to achieve or how would we like to change the way we
perform our jobs? What do we need, either in our own development, or
from others, to reach our new goals? Looking at performance assessment
as a time to improve, and supervisors as coaches, changes the assessment
process. When we meet with common goals of helping one another to
become better at all that we do, it creates a calming, productive atmos-
phere in which to have a heartfelt, meaningful conversation.
When we complete a performance review, we’ve learned more about
ourselves and we are committed to improvement. It’s time to pause and
#d 257 D3

acknowledge our progress. If this performance assessment went more
smoothly than past ones, that’s something to celebrate. Being open to
feedback opens the door to professional improvement and personal
growth, which is a benefit to us all.
I will see an assessment as one tool that can help me improve. I will try to welcome
the feedback as necessary to being my best.
The Sacredness in the Ordinary
The following is a 15th century, Muslim story:
A farmer was planting his crop when he was told that God was coming to
earth at that very moment. Unmoved, he looked down at the work at
hand, and continued to plant. The farmer didn’t look up or move
because he found no need to leave his place to find God.
The story is a reminder that work has a sacredness about it, as mundane
as it may seem.

Day in and day out, we are immersed in the bustle of hospital life, of
nursing homes, physician offices, and treatment centers. We are bom-
barded by incessant demands and activities. In the midst of it all, take a
moment to listen to quieter voices—not unlike the farmer, who listened
but continued to hoe the fields, all the while feeling God’s presence.

During these moments, we are mindful of the sacredness of what we are

about. At the same time, we might recall the delicate dreams that first led
us into health care. Those early hopes and dreams are easily forgotten if
we don’t continue to nourish them.

Today, I will see the sacredness in my every day work. I will give “air time” to the
dreams that drew me into health care and allow them to express themselves in my
every day interactions at work.

#d 258 D3 #d 259 D3
 Respect: Taking a Fresh Look
Some employees say that they do not feel respected by their managers.
The word respect is derived from two Latin words, re and spectare. Spectare
means “to look” and re means “again.” So, to respect someone we have to
take a second glance, to look again, and to see the other person afresh.
When we see others who have “menial” jobs, it’s so easy to overlook their
presence and importance. It’s also possible to dismiss a CEO, believing
that she is hypocritical or out of touch with the organization. Remember,
we’re only seeing one side of the person, and so our judgment is bound
to be superficial. To show respect, we have to take the time to look at
one another.
What applies to colleagues also applies to patients. Developing respect for
one another involves taking the time to view them from differing
perspectives. The unwashed patient or gruff colleagues are more than
unwashed and gruff. It takes a second look to discover what lies beneath
the surface.
The more difficult challenge is to turn a respectful glance toward our-
selves, to drop the boxes in which we have placed ourselves, and then turn
outward to care for others. We are always more than we have settled for.
Just as I don’t want to be forever labeled, I will look at my colleagues and others
with a fresh perspective. I will look beyond appearances and first impressions and
respect the individual beneath the surface.
#d 260 D3
Being Open to the Unseen
Do you feel like playing a game? Count the number of “F”s in the
following text.
finished files are the result of years of
scientific study combined with the
experience of years
STOP. Do not read further until you have counted.
How many did you count? If you noticed three, you are wrong. There are
six. Most people miss the “F”s in the word of.
How often do we miss seeing what is right in front of us because we
weren’t expecting it? For example, a doctor saw a female patient who was
complaining of heartburn and tiredness. He had seen many patients
with these symptoms over the years so he assumed she was suffering from
the same basic ailment as everyone else—stress. He prescribed a change
of diet and told her to learn to care for herself. When she returned a few
weeks later however, she had the same symptoms, only worse. This time,
she saw the physician’s partner. After a more careful examination, the
second physician recognized that the woman was suffering from heart
disease. Why did the first physician miss the diagnosis? He jumped to
conclusions. Said another way, he did not give a second glance. He was
not re-spectful.
Being a professional, it is easy to think of our beliefs and judgments as
“right.” However, experts frequently demonstrate a more limited insight
than someone with less education but an open mind. Arrogance and self-
#d 261 D3

satisfaction can lead the best of us to overlook what’s under our nose.
When the truth catches up to us, it can be a very humbling experience.
All of us are subject to this kind of complacency. The first step is to be
aware of it. Then, we have to have the humility to put aside our own
assumptions and take a fresh look. It will save someone’s life.
We can improve the value we bring to our work by being open to what
we do not see. A faint discoloration in an x-ray or the slight irregularity
of a heartbeat is easy to miss. Respect and humility are key needs for
every clinician.
Although humbling, I realize that I may not see everything that’s in front of me. Now
is an opportunity to learn from others and to be open to new solutions.
#d 262 D3
Integrity in Action
During a meeting this afternoon, an employee mentioned how a physi-
cian’s behavior in one of our emergency departments unsettled her. In
the course of a surgery, a time filled with tension, she was the object of his
anger. The staff overheard his outburst.
Later, he came up and apologized to her. “I’m sorry for what I said. The
truth is, I was preoccupied with something else and I took my frustration
out on you.”
“That physician has integrity,” she told us at the meeting. “When he took
personal responsibility for his actions instead of blowing off his behavior,
he showed real strength of character and I genuinely respected him for
that. I appreciated not only that he was honest with me, but that he had
the strength to admit what he had done.”
Like the physician, each of us has said or done something that we later
regretted, and like him, we can right the wrong. We don’t have to let stand
the last lamentable words we said. Others will feel better if we make an
effort to heal the wounds. It’s easy to say that we hold ourselves to a high
moral standard, but the real test of this is whether our actions back up our
words. How many of us read about leading a more principled life but fail
to bring theory into practice? This effort takes on genuine meaning when
we bring our values into the work place. When we take personal respon-
sibility for our actions, we shape the place we work into an environment
we can be proud of.
I will take a fresh look at my organization’s values and think about how I can put those
values into practice and shape how I work—as an individual and as a team member.
#d 263 D3
Remembering the Trustthat Others Give Us
Here is an account of the experience of ambulance drivers in New
Orleans transporting patients during hurricane Katrina. The New York
Times reported:
can keep the image of those mothers handing over their infants in the
forefront of our memory—think of them being handed to us—we will
recognize the importance of our work and the trust being placed in us,
whatever our job. This will influence how we work.

“At Touro Infirmary, mothers were just giving my medics their little I will reflect on the sacred job I have as others entrust me to help them as only I can.
day-old babies. They were just looking at us with fear and horror on their faces. We would put I will encourage my colleagues to find a protected moment of quiet to consider the
four of them in an incubator and just fly them out. They’re scattered all over the country now. important role they play.
We couldn’t keep track of where everyone was going.”

Can you imagine the experience of those mothers? It seems incredible

that they would entrust their newly born infants to strangers. Can you
picture how the medics felt as they held those babies? The intensity must
have been extraordinary.

On the one hand, there is little comparison between the experience of

these people and ours. On the other hand, we do have something in com-
mon. Every time a parent, child or friend brings their loved one to the
hospital, clinical practice or residential center, they place their trust in
us, similar to the way those mothers entrusted their infants to the medics.
They don’t know us, but they trust us. Often, we are not aware of what an
intense and remarkable relationship we are in when we welcome a patient
into our care. It can easily seem like one more person among so many.

Events like Katrina shock us into thinking again about our relationship
to patients and their families. Whether we are a medic, doctor, nurse,
admissions clerk, receptionist, telephone operator, pharmacist, billing
clerk, chaplain, buyer, or case manager, we are trusted and needed. If we

#d 264 D3 #d 265 D3
 Honoring Mentors, Being a Mentor
Mr. Rogers of television fame, was fond of saying to children, “All of us
have special ones who have loved us into being.” He would then invite the
children to think of the people who have helped them become who they
are. His reason for doing this was to awaken an awareness of being loved
and secure.
In the workaday world, we seldom talk of love, but many of us remember
special individuals who have helped us become who we are. Often, it is
because they said or did something to affirm their belief in our abilities.
They were probably our former teachers, supervisors, grandparents,
aunts or uncles. When someone has affirmed us profoundly, we carry a
memory of them in hidden corners of our mind for years. The more we
recognize and appreciate how they helped us, the more we are willing to
care for others in similar ways.
If we want to help build an exemplary organization, we have to find ways
to transform our treasured memories into the way we work. Practically
speaking, that means developing a climate within the work place where
affirmation, approval, trust and support are characteristics of every floor,
office, cubicle, and conference room.
I will reflect on the important mentors in my life. I will honor them and their efforts
by doing my best, and mentoring someone else the way I was so lovingly mentored.
#d 266 D3
Seeing the Saints Among Us
During the television coverage of the events surrounding the pope’s death,
the lead commentator expressed his surprise at how many non-Catholics
waited in line to pass by his body. “For some reason,” he added, “this leader
attracted a wide array of people for causes I find difficult to explain.”
One explanation may lie in Pope John Paul’s own words. As he aged, he
knew that every human being is made in the image and likeness of God,
and must be treated with dignity. Fame, wealth, poverty, faith, age,
appearance, or talents—all of these are of little consequence. Perhaps he
appealed to such a wide group of people across cultures because he saw the
goodness of everyone. All of us need to be accepted, listened to, and
appreciated for what and who we are. Unfortunately, we don’t do this
nearly enough. We marvel when we see those who do.
Centuries earlier, another man had a similar appeal. Legend has it that
Francis of Assisi awakened to the dignity of others when he saw a leper
walking toward him on a narrow road. Instead of crossing to the other
side to avoid the man, he was moved to embrace him. That was the
moment that Francis discovered that the leper was Jesus in disguise.
From that point on, it is said that he began to recognize the dignity of
every individual.
Why does the memory of Francis linger today? Because we all yearn to be
in the presence of those who see the beauty in everyone.
There are saints among us. Observe the way a nursing assistant washes a
patient who has soiled his bed when unable to control his bowels. Notice
how a tech approaches a patient who has to expose herself embarrassingly
#d 267 D3

in the process of having a mammogram. You will see the difference
between employees who simply do their job and those who are saintly.
Look around during a meeting and listen to the words of others. Listen
to the way they speak, and you will notice that there are other St. Francis’s
among us.
The physician, Albert Schweitzer wrote, “You don’t have to be an angel
to be a saint.” We can see the saintly quality in others when they bring a
healing presence to the work place.
Today, I will look for the saints around me. I will observe how they see the
sacredness in other people and try acting this way, too.
#d 268 D3
It’s Easy to Make a Difference
An acknowledgement can be as simple as a smile or a nod. Our state of
mind improves, and our whole day can turn around by the kind words of
recognition by a coworker or manager. It doesn’t cost anything to extend
ourselves in this way and it can have a lasting impact.
The contemporary American philosopher Francis Fukuyama makes a case
for the fact that all of us yearn to be acknowledged. “The struggle for
recognition is the motor that drives human history.”
We can try to be recognized in many ways. Doing a good job is certainly
one. I know that I feel better when my good work is acknowledged. While
it’s a subtle feeling that is often hard to admit, all of us are uncomfort-
ably vulnerable when we are not acknowledged on the job. This is true
even for an administrator who is not recognized by a passing physician,
or a food service employee who is not recognized by her manager. Since
we know how much it means to have our work affirmed, let’s not be afraid
to give it freely to others. It could be a turning point in their day.
Patients need to be affirmed. They are particularly vulnerable because
they are ill. They may also be feeling off-balance as they wrestle with the
uncertainty of not knowing when or even if they will return to health.
Their lack of control over their illness and their future can leave them
feeling decidedly insecure. Feeling as if no one else can understand what
they are experiencing can make them feel worse.
Family members are equally vulnerable and needy of affirmation. When a
sensitive nurse, lab tech or LPN provides a smile, the family is touched.
Not receiving a simple acknowledgement makes people feel unseen.
#d 269 D3
 Resisting New People, New Ideas
See how easy it is to extend yourself by affirming the presence of those During my lunch hour, I went to the pharmacy to pick up some aspirin.
you meet and observe how your smile and acknowledgment affects them When crossing the parking lot, I met one of our nurses walking with her
(and you!). young daughter.

My day will improve as I seek to improve the lives of others. “Say hello to Mr. Helldorfer,” her mom said. The child kept her head
down with her hands in her pockets. “Oh, go ahead, say hello to Marty.
Shake his hand.” The child didn’t budge. “What’s wrong with you? Take
your hands out of your pockets.”

Slowly, the little girl took her curled right hand from her trousers. Guess
what those fingers clutched. A Hershey chocolate kiss! No wonder she did
not want to shake hands.

When driving back to work, I wondered if all of us are not, at times, like
that beautiful child. What do we cherish most? We might say our privacy,
our reputation, and the esteem of others. How many of us hold these
things so dear that we won’t take the chance of revealing our innermost
feelings and dreams to others? One difference between the child and
ourselves is that we have grown much more sophisticated in what we hold
on to.

Meeting that child has made me think about what holds us back from
reaching out to patients and colleagues. The answer will be different for
each of us. It is worth pondering.

In this moment of quiet, I will honestly ask myself, “What is holding me back from
opening up to others? What am I afraid of losing? What do I have to gain?”

#d 270 D3 #d 271 D3
Honoring What’s Important
and Being Present
When I was a new executive at a large health care organization, I wanted
to introduce myself to the nursing home’s administrator, but her
assistant told me that she was not in her office. Nor was she sitting at the
nursing station where the telephone operator thought I would find her.
A few moments after being paged, I saw a woman coming across the foyer,
hand extended, saying, “Welcome, I recognize you.”
Before I could respond she said, “A resident here just died, and his wife
has arrived. She needs someone now, and I don't want to leave her alone.
This isn’t a good time to talk. Would you want to come down with me to
be with her?”
This was a wonderful example of patient care. She put the family’s needs
first instead of relying on protocol. Even though we’d just met, she didn’t
simply engage in small talk, pretending to listen while she was really
preoccupied with the pressure of another crisis down the hall. She found
a way to greet me and include me in her work all at the same time. I felt
welcomed and I’m sure the family felt cared for.
This administrator’s gift is the gift of many engaged in health care. She
was able to prioritize the needs of many, while still attending to all. In this
case, the necessity of the family trumped organizational expectations. All
of us can receive inspiration from her and ponder how we can behave the
same way as we face these choices in our work lives.
Today, I will think about what is most important at that moment. I will give my
attention first to the care of those who need me.
#d 272 D3
Valuing Creativity and Play
In the weeks leading up to Halloween, children’s minds are imaginative as
they think about what costumes to wear and what creature they will
become as soon as the sun goes down. While they prepare for Halloween,
they are testing themselves and thinking creatively about who they might
turn into. It’s an exciting process. For many children, the big thrill is
seeing adults react to their new-found identities, whether they are
princesses, soldiers or goblins.
Children are unique ambassadors representing the land of energy,
creativity and play. They play and get us to play and laugh as only the
young can do. It sometimes takes quite an effort to drop the adult
façade that we’ve built over the years. After all, we think that as adults,
we must be more serious and abandon “play time” in favor of activities
that meet our growing obligations. As we age, playfulness may become
more difficult to awaken. Creativity may take a back seat to duty. Deep
inside there resides a hidden ability to play and be creative.
Children have special qualities to offer those of us in health care. Our
work requires enormous energy and creativity. We can change the mood
of a patient’s room simply by an understanding or welcoming expression
on our face. People lying in hospital beds are feeling particularly
vulnerable. What an unexpected and invaluable gift we give them just by
approaching them with a buoyant attitude and presence.
It’s often difficult to imagine that an attitude of play is necessary within
hospitals, hospices or skilled nursing facilities. We think of them as places
where people are pre-occupied daily with illness, dying and death.
Finding a way to lighten things up actually contributes to healing in our
#d 273 D3

patients, and staves off burnout in us. We intuitively understand the
healing qualities of play. Play has a way of energizing people—that goes
for patients, their families, and us. And once again, we can learn from
children. They crave play.
Just by being around children, we are lifted by their spirit and reminded
of the value of play without abandoning our responsibilities as adults.
No matter how busy we feel we are, we can still find ways to try on new
costumes, new ways of doing our jobs, and new and creative approaches
to providing high quality health care. Having the freedom to implement
new ways of doing things is critical if we want to become the organization
we envision.
By being open to a more playful and creative approach to work, I will have more
energy and I may discover a new and effective way to do my job. I will let my inner
desire for fun come out.
#d 274 D3
Improving Care One Person at a Time
I have a tendency to stress what is positive in life rather than focus on what
is negative. This was strengthened during my clinical training when my
supervisors encouraged me to listen intently to the negative but to affirm
the positive. I have found that advice particularly helpful over the years.
This week, that approach was challenged when I received a copy of this
unsettling note from a patient. He wrote:
“I have been in quite a few hospitals as of late, and generally speaking, the staff [at your
hospital] was very unfriendly. I don’t think any of them know how to say, ‘Hi, how are you?’
I don’t think they have to fall all over patients, but at least [they need] to act friendly and try
to cheer a patient up. [The first one I met] was a classic. He should have been working at a
funeral home. I think your hospital staff needs PR [training].”
It wasn’t easy to receive a letter like this, but it motivated us tremendous-
ly to be more welcoming to patients and their families. These letters
remind us of our desire to treat every patient and all of our colleagues in
personable and caring ways.
One important component in the way many medical facilities measure
success is by the degree of patient satisfaction. How patients feel about the
care they are receiving starts with first impressions. Taking the time to
look a patient in the eye, say hello, and ask them how they feel is an
ongoing challenge when we are busy. Completing tasks always seem more
important than making a welcoming gesture. One way to encourage us to
#d 275 D3

extend a warm gesture, is to become genuinely aware of how we affect
others. Making people feel welcome sets the tone for the rest of the care
we will be giving them. It is as important as taking vital signs, administer-
ing medications, and charting.
I will listen to every person I meet and respond as best I can. I will draw from my
inner reserve where my needs have been met and be a source of hope and comfort.
Every interaction today is sacred.
#d 276 D3
Waking Up!
Several years ago, I attended a conference and heard a physician tell this
true story. I do not remember which conference it was nor the name of
the impressive speaker. I have not forgotten the story. A depressed
OB/GYN had lost his enthusiasm for his profession. One morning while
he was assisting a woman in childbirth, he had a breathtaking experience.
He was holding her newborn in his left hand, and with his right hand he
was performing a procedure to suction the mucus from the infant’s
mouth and nose. He had done this hundreds of times throughout his
career. This time, however, the newborn child suddenly opened her eyes.
As their eyes met, he became overwhelmed by the realization that he
was the first human being this baby ever saw. He was filled with an
overwhelming sense of obligation to welcome her into the world.
The experience had a remarkable impact on this man. He didn’t leave the
profession after all, but “awoke” to what caring for others was all about—
the unique impact that all health care professionals have to support life,
and to be there for others when they’re at their most vulnerable. He
remains in his practice today.
Every day, we have an opportunity to awaken to the value and importance
of what we do. Even after years of sleepwalking through our work, we can
wake up one morning and become conscious of the affect we have daily on
the lives of the people we meet. Moments of awakening influence how we
work, why we work and how we spend our time throughout the day.
Every time my eyes meet those of my patients, my colleagues, my friends, my
children and my loved ones, I will see this as an invitation to awaken to this special
moment and to the unique gifts I have to offer.
#d 277 D3
 Being Open to New Ideas
Sometimes in daily life we expect one thing, yet find another. We learn by
being open to the unexpected. After all, if we expect something, we
already know it! Expectations simply reinforce what we already know. Real
learning begins with inquiry. True learners are wide open to new per-
spectives and fresh ideas; they possess a genuine eagerness to know more.
Learning is a gift. Children have it and so do many adults. The gift is
easy to lose as we grow older. Likely, there are many reasons for this.
Some people have a physical reason for not being able to learn. Their
brain is injured or undeveloped. Some seem to choose to stop learning
because they are afraid of change or are satisfied with life as it is. New
information might challenge their ways, and they will not allow
themselves to open their minds.
If we work in the clinical side of patient care, a closed mind can have
particularly unfortunate consequences. It can result in significant
medical errors. Every day, thousands of our patients entrust their lives to
us. We cannot afford to become rigid in our thinking or negative in our
attitudes. Our patients deserve more. Our calling requires more. There
is no choice to be otherwise.
Today, for my personal growth and professional development, I will be open to new
ideas and new information.
#d 278 D3
A Day of Profound Care
One day over sixty years ago, Russian Allied Forces opened the gates of
Auschwitz and found more than seven thousand starving women and
men. That day marked the end of one of the most infamous atrocities that
man has perpetrated against man.
Take a moment during this workday to ponder the paraphrased
sentiments of a survivor:
God was absent; neither felt nor seen. What I have learned from Auschwitz is that you and I, as
well as every single human being, must now do what God would have done if he were there …
and would do if he were here … that is, to turn toward one another in infinitely caring ways.
“To do what God would have done if he were there” are words of a man
with profound faith. We can let them become our words by turning
toward our patients, colleagues, strangers, and loved ones with profound
care and human compassion.
I will observe the depth of caring taking place all around me and seek to support
that. I am grateful for the skill of my colleagues and everyone who participates in
the healing and caring that is taking place here.
#d 279 D3
 Going Beyond Your Job Description
Have you recognized how we sometimes go through life as if asleep
and then we’re shocked into awareness by an unexpected event? That
happened to me recently.
Last week, I had bilateral upper lid blepharoplasty surgery to correct
a drooping eyelid. While lying on the operating table before the proce-
dure, a nurse asked me if I was comfortable. I said, “Sort of, but I’m
cold.” In a matter of seconds, a warm blanket appeared! “Anything else?”
“Nope, I feel fine.” Within a few minutes when everything was ready, the
anesthesiologist placed a plastic mask over my nose and mouth and said,
“The mask will smell a little like plastic. We’re ready to start the oxygen.
Soon you will be asleep.” Standard procedure.
What happened next was not. The nurse asked me again if I was comfort-
able. I nodded, yet I wasn’t telling the whole truth. I did not tell her that
I was actually thinking that I could die during this procedure. People
sometimes do. After a moment the nurse leaned over and said, “I’ll be
here all during the procedure. I won’t leave you.” She placed her hand on
my shoulder and I felt as secure as I have ever felt. I remember thinking
that—even if I did not wake up—everything was okay. It was her touch that
awakened as well as healed.
Why do I tell you this story? Because it taught me afresh what everyone in
our field knows, yet is easily lost: when we extend ourselves beyond what
is minimally required, we ourselves are rewarded. As nurses, doctors and
others who are directly responsible for patient care, we are invited on a
daily basis to touch our fellow human beings in a moving way, one that is
#d 280 D3
so profound that it is transforming. No job description can adequately
describe the sense of honor of being in the position of influencing
another vulnerable human being.
A “job” becomes a “calling” when we follow our intuition and anticipate
and wordlessly meet another person’s needs, when we hold the hand of a
scared patient, or stroke her hair, or give her a warm blanket and squeeze
her hand. The reward, if we need one, comes as we experience that
moment of being present to the other person. Being present is a gift to
the patient as well as to ourselves. When we extend ourselves to others, we
too, are deeply changed. Few other human experiences rival this moment
in its beauty and value.
All of us are not nurses, chaplains or physicians. Many are electricians,
office assistants, techs, nutritionists, carpenters, executives, accountants,
and housekeepers. In our day-to-day work, these deeply moving experi-
ences with others are not as likely to happen. However, opportunities will
still arise with coworkers that are perhaps not as dramatic.
Whatever our jobs, we have an opportunity to be a supportive presence to
others. The encounter might occur in the hallway, in a meeting, or on
the phone. We can prepare ourselves by quietly seeking the courage to
speak with others when we sense their need.
Today, I will make a conscious decision to offer reassurance to someone. If I need
that reassurance today, I will be open to receiving it. I will perpetuate a circle
of caring.
#d 281 D3
 Making Decisions
Sometimes, I live as if decisions come easily to me. After all, I tell myself,
I am the leader, and I can’t appear unknowing by asking for advice. I also
don’t want to risk receiving advice that I don’t agree with, and then not
follow the recommendation I sought. There are hundreds of reasons to
make decisions all by myself—and all of them are wrong. On decisions,
Walt Whitman said, “When all men think alike, very little is thought of.”
As a thought group of one, how many diverse opinions can you have?
It has taken a long time to learn how important it is to surround myself
with people who are willing to risk expressing different perspectives and
alternatives. They are equally important as contrarians. I call them my
“spotters,” another word for supporters. My team expects me to make
decisions when they need to be made and also to facilitate a process that
includes them in my thinking. I count on them to help me make
informed decisions.
Every day, each of us faces difficult decisions. Every time we make one, we
are influencing someone else’s world. That alone makes us leaders. When
we need to make tough decisions, who are our “spotters”? Who will share
their thinking and give us a different perspective? At times, we may feel
alone and that there is no one we can trust. Speaking from experience, I
can tell you this is an illusion.
Confide in people. The isolation we sometimes feel is of our own
making. With a team that “spots,” decisions are opportunities not only to
promote patient care, but to mature personally and professionally.
Today, I will look for a team I can trust to provide different perspectives. I will try
not to go it alone in my decision-making.
#d 282 D3
Being Connected
Here are some examples of employees caring for one another:
Yesterday, while cleaning a patient’s room, one of our employees died.
Two patients witnessed his death, and an observer described what
followed. “You couldn’t believe how the staff responded. They seemed to
react as one person. Their emotions were so singularly in tune with one
another that words were unnecessary. When they saw a need, they just
took it upon themselves to do what needed to be done. No one person
stood out. It seemed as if they had rehearsed their “dance.”
A year ago, an environmental service employee had a serious motorcycle
accident. During his recuperation, he ran out of earned vacation time.
Other employees donated theirs, not an easy thing when work already
takes up such a huge chunk of their lives. I saw the man the other day. He
was all smiles. Even though he will never know all the people who dedi-
cated their time, he was clearly grateful. Is it unusual that all these people
would sacrifice themselves just for a coworker? Not at all. It is one more
example of what we do when we feel connected one to another.
One day, a physician, on his way from the pharmacy to the floor, passed
a woman who was clearly lost and late for an appointment. When the
doctor asked her where she wanted to go, the physician discovered that it
was to an office in an adjacent building. He actually accompanied the
patient to that office just because she needed him to. Couldn’t be, you
might say. Physicians don’t have that kind of time. But, the story is true.
#d 283 D3

And how about the nurse who changed the days she worked to accommodate
a colleague who wanted to be home when her child returned from his first
day at school? A small thing? Not to the child; neither to his mother.
These are everyday occurrences brought about by ordinary professionals.
Our offices are more than buildings. They are places where we love in
particularly unique ways.
If I see an opportunity to help today, I will offer my time, talent or services in
whatever way possible. I will be changed for the better and so will the other person.
#d 284 D3
Honoring Unique Gifts
Rosh Hashanah began yesterday. This two-day celebration marks the
beginning of the Jewish New Year. It is the time when our colleagues
think of G-d as opening the Book of Life, observing all creatures, and
giving them the opportunity to adjust their ways.
Jewish families relish this holiday and the coming series of holy days that
follow. This season will be marked by family gatherings, special foods, and
deeply felt memories of those who died, particularly parents and family
members. There is a unique depth and quietness about this holiday.
Many of our employees are of the Jewish faith. Each is a gift just as every
one of us is a gift. One of our strengths lies in the fact that we are remark-
ably diverse in race, ethnicity, religion and education. Without that
diversity, we would never be able to understand, respect and serve our
patients who have equally diverse backgrounds. Precisely because we want
to serve our patients in the best ways possible, we need to recognize our
differences. Our mission unites us; our individual talents and differences
bring new life to our work.
Today, our Jewish colleagues have drawn apart to be with their families.
When they return to work after the holidays, let’s look for opportunities
to express our appreciation to them for reminding us of the unique gifts
that they, and each of us, bring to our patients.
What unique gifts and perspective do I bring to the work place? What is unique
about my colleagues? My respect for others will grow as I learn more about
other traditions.
#d 285 D3
The Tradition of the Holidays
in the Hospital
In many ways, the modern work place makes the story behind Christmas
day seem part of a distant past. With the donkeys and the hay and the
frankincense and myrrh, it’s hard to bring the relevance of the birth of
Jesus into today’s world. Yet the underlying meaning of the holiday is not
distant. It is another way of acknowledging and celebrating the holiness
imbedded within the human heart and the sacredness of the home we call
earth. Hanukkah has a similar message of rededication of spirit and the
expression of spiritual values in the everyday experience. This under-
standing of the world is something all of us can share, whatever our
traditions and cultures.
In spite of the spiritual underpinning of this special day, we still have jobs
to do. Many employees have to work during the holidays so that thousands
of patients can receive the care they need. Hospital rooms must be
cleaned, nourishment provided, faucets repaired, diagnoses made, and
medicines prescribed. The care on a holiday is as good as it is on any
other day. The only way this can happen is because of the selflessness of
caregivers. Their goodness and generosity are easily overlooked.
On Christmas day, you can walk into any hospital and everything will
seem quite ordinary. Staff is going about their business taking care of
patients. Yet, the fact that these workers are there is what makes it so won-
drous. Their care on this day is a way of making kindness tangible. These
acts are rumors of sacredness. To those who work on holidays, thank you.
I am grateful for the opportunity to work with a dedicated team of people. I will be
an expression of healing and caring, remembering why I chose this work.
#d 286 D3
Being Present
Another employee and I were invited to speak at a community center on
the topic of end-of-life care. The room was packed with elderly residents
of a nearby high-rise retirement home. Our talk focused on aging with
dignity and the need for Advanced Directives. We were explaining to
the audience the “Five Wishes” document that helps people prepare for
such moments.
As I sat and watched my colleague make her presentation, it was clear she
had everyone’s attention. You could have heard a pin drop in the room.
It turned out that her interest in the topic came from an intensely
personal experience when her husband of two years unexpectedly fell ill
and died within six months. She spoke about how difficult it was for her
to prepare for the death of her young husband. Afterward, she explained
how to complete the Advanced Directive document.
Why was she communicating so well? Many would say it was because the
subject was so pertinent to this audience. It could also have been her solid
grasp of the subject matter and her uncanny ability to be funny while
speaking on a difficult topic. It was clear to me, however, that her ability
to engage the audience came from her willingness to reveal something
about herself. This invited the audience’s trust. She risked being exposed.
The risk was rewarded. She created a connection and built a bond of
closeness as the audience heard her story.
We are highly trained, competent professionals. Whether our jobs are
maintaining buildings, preparing food, typing letters, nursing at the
bedside, reviewing charts, running tests, prescribing meds, operating on
patients or simply visiting them, we have the opportunity to be a healing
#d 287 D3

presence. Technical competence is never an obstacle to being a healing
presence. The challenge is to put more of us into our actions, to bring
that rare and magical quality called presence into every moment of
the day.
“Presence” is more than just a basic awareness of the physical details
around us. It is the best of us that is available and ready to “come out” any
time. We become present when we invite our authentic core to come to
the surface.
Being present involves a choice. We can choose to operate like a robot or
we can take the risk to allow the full expression of our unique selves to
shine through our actions, words and attitudes throughout the day.
Those few words, being present where we are, are extremely important. They
describe a person who is engaged.
I will invite all of who I am—my training, my experience, and yes, even my authentic
core—to the task at hand. I will see how this enriches my life and adds to
others’ experience.
#d 288 D3
Honoring ThoseWho Came Before Us
Labor Day is rooted in the history of the American laborer who toiled
under the weight of tedious, backbreaking work. Unionization paved the
way for the rights and protections we take for granted today: the 8-hour
workday, the 5-day work week, paid vacations, and safety protection. This
legal holiday is one way to acknowledge the power and value of those who
fought for their rights so we could have ours.
We are a privileged people. We have time and a life apart from work,
which many in the world do not have. We have time to reflect. Who is
not grateful?
Long weekends open a space in the normal pattern of our workaday lives.
We have time to reflect on the ways in which we are blessed. Our good
fortune rests on the efforts of those who have gone before us as well as
those who work beside us.
While it may be difficult to express our gratitude to those whose contribu-
tion was made in the distant past, we can nevertheless express to others,
patients, our loved ones, and colleagues, how much we appreciate them.
Today, I will find a way to show appreciation for my coworkers. I will express my
gratitude for all the ways they help me improve the work I do.
#d 289 D3
Valuing Partnership,
Celebrating Competition
Within the clinical world, we think in terms of “diagnoses.” An accurate
diagnosis helps us understand an illness and guides us as we develop the
appropriate plan of care. While we usually think of diagnoses in terms of
individuals, it is also a way to understand organizations.
During a meeting at one of our hospitals attended mostly by managers
and directors, it was announced that patient satisfaction with their care
had risen significantly. The room broke into a spontaneous ovation.
A sense of pride was undeniable. Collectively, we felt rewarded for the
conscious effort we had made to be more aware of patient needs.
After making the announcement, the CEO acknowledged how good it felt
and how proud he was of our progress. Then he added, “We are pleased,
as we should be, with our results. However, remember that our colleagues
(the sister hospitals within the system that did not significantly improve)
are working equally hard to improve their scores. Let’s find ways to
celebrate, not as winners, but as colleagues.” He was aware that while a
competitive environment can motivate, it can also have an adverse effect.
If a hospital were to flaunt its accomplishments, collaboration and team-
work would be stymied. One-upsmanship does not create cultures that
support healing, teamwork, and partnership.
The diagnosis? Their organization is healthy. What was the symptom
leading to the diagnosis? They were able to genuinely enjoy another’s
success without feeling that this success was their loss.
The only way to provide the very best patient care is to recognize that each
of us on every team affects the quality of this care. We are interconnected.
Celebrating the success of one team is cause for all of us to celebrate.
Honoring and acknowledging the value that all of us contribute to an
organization enhances our work and the quality of care we bring to all of
our patients. If we have a real passion for improving patient care, we
understand the importance of valuing every team’s contribution and the
value of every member on every team. We can work together as a team to
celebrate what we, and others in our organization have accomplished.
It is up to us—not just others—to find creative and life-giving ways to
celebrate. At its best, health care is built on the value of partnering,
not competition.
I will recognize the value that every member of every team brings to my organization.

The next day, I attended a weekly meeting of managers and directors at

one of those sister hospitals. The CEO announced the success of their
sister hospital. There was unprompted applause. They were genuinely
supportive and appreciative of their colleagues’ accomplishments.

#d 290 D3 #d 291 D3
 B eing More Than What We Do
We are a combination of what we do and who we are. Being and doing are
two sides of the same coin. We need both. If we believe we are fine just the
way we are and do not have to do anything, we are mistaken. If we think
“doing” is the only thing that is important, that is equally limiting and
short-sighted. The quality of what we do is as important as what we do or
how much we do.
When we accent being at the expense of doing, we become ineffective. When
we focus on doing at the expense of being, work loses its inspiration. We
overlook the value of expressing human qualities in our work, and work
becomes drudgery.
Almost everyone craves a work place where they are valued both for what
they do and who they are. It is up to us to create the climate.
Today, I will be a human being and a human doing. There is a place for both parts of
me. I will notice and acknowledge my coworkers as human be ings.
#d 292 D3
Honoring the Beautyof and Sacredness
Our Surroundings
Today is Earth Day, marked by celebrations, tree plantings, speeches, and
mobilized groups promoting open space, the cleaning of our streets and
the painting of homes in low-income areas. It reminds us that you and I
are entrusted with the care of this world. Someone who sees the world as
a garden lives in a different world than one who thinks of the earth as raw
material. Someone who sees the earth as a garden will treat it with love
and respect, will recognize its seasons, and will help it grow. A person who
sees it as his own personal garbage dump takes what he wants from it and
throws away whatever he wants, regardless of the consequences.
Today, the sky is cloudless, the air is dry, and the temperature warm.
Yet most of us will not see the day’s beauty nor feel its warmth. We live in
windowless operating rooms, business offices, and surgery centers. We
come to work before seven and leave when only an hour or two of light
remains. The world that has been entrusted to our care during the work
week is indoors, yet it is no less sacred.
Earth Day gives us a chance to pause and think about our environment.
When we have perspective, these patient-centered, windowless worlds of
hospitals and offices can become as beautiful as the mountains and plains
that surround the cities. Each of us can create a garden within the work
place by shaping how we work with our colleagues and how we serve those
entrusted to our care. The challenge here is to remember that we co-
create the world in which we live.
Today, I will do one small thing to make my world more beautiful. I will look for the
beauty in my work environment and treat it as sacred.
#d 293 D3
 The Spiritual Side of Health Care
Medical residents meet every morning to discuss various medical issues
with their physician teachers. Recently, I sat among the ninety resident
docs. The topic focused on the residency training experience: what areas
of medical practice were emphasized, the expectations that were placed
on residents, and residents’ experience as new doctors. One of the physi-
cians asked the residents, “In your program, is attention paid to your
spiritual care and that of your patients?” The physicians all chuckled
uncomfortably at the question.
While I left the meeting wondering why they laughed, I had a hunch.
Physicians have told me that as they go through medical school and gain
an understanding of how the body works, they leave with a wealth of
knowledge about the body and a lost sense of the spiritual side of life.
This is unfortunate because when a physician enters a patient’s room,
that person is looking for a physician-healer.
patient in this way. We do this by being attuned to their needs as human
beings and responding with heart. This allows us to provide a deeper level
of care that supports the medical treatment they are receiving.
The spiritual side of life is always present. We are more than our physi-
cality. The spiritual side of life is embedded within, and not separate
from, the ordinariness of everyday life. We are wholly body and wholly
spirit. We are never only body or only spirit. If we are uncomfortable
talking about this side of life, we need to ask ourselves why. To be an
effective healer we cannot be fearful or unfamiliar with this side of life.
I will be open to the physical and spiritual sides of life. I am a better healer when I
embrace and acknowledge both.

What do we mean by spiritual? Many think the word is a reference to

piety, involvement with a faith community or with a belief system.
Spirituality is something more.

When a resident is asked to consider a patient’s spiritual needs, she must

ask herself, “Can I be a healer?” That is an unsettling question. Who
would not draw back when asked? She may feel unequal to the task and
perhaps inadequately prepared to meet this expectation. If we look more
closely at what we mean by tending to a patient’s spiritual or emotional
needs, our resident may feel more confident in her ability to “heal” a

#d 294 D3 #d 295 D3
 Awakening to the Sacredness of
Life—and Our Work
Most days seem ordinary. We have the responsibilities that go along with
managing a household, raising children and holding down a job. Before
arriving at work, we have to prepare lunches and get our children off to
school (or at least out of bed). We may not even have time for a bowl of
cereal, a piece of toast or a cup of coffee. If we’re really lucky, we may
have time to exercise a little before climbing into our car to make our
way to work.
Every once in a while we are shocked into a more reflective place when our
taken-for-granted world is disrupted. Tragedy can do that. So can love.
Both can awaken us to the sacredness of our work and world.
Once we find a moment to retreat from the distractions, we can become
consciously aware of the sacredness of the work we do, right down to
the tiniest task. Just because something is ordinary doesn’t mean it
isn’t sacred.
Today, I will shake myself awake. I have opportunities to care.
#d 296 D3
Index by Topic
TA K I N G T I M E TO R E F L EC T PAG E
Taking a “Protected Time” to Reflect ........................................23
Slowing Down and Feeling Connected ....................................72
Purposeful Reflection: Do You Truly Value Time? ......................172
The Quiet Reality Underneath the Busyness ................................71
Taking the Time to be Attentive..............................................179
Remembering to Pause..........................................................112
Valuing Vacation ................................................................189
Becoming Quiet and Listening to Our Heart ............................212
Slowing Down and Thinking About All We Have........................130
Reflecting on Our Lives in and Outside of Work ........................256
C R E AT I N G A P L AC E O F H E A L I N G PAG E
Healing Presence..................................................................21
Remembering the Trust that Others Give Us ............................264
A Day of Profound Care ......................................................279
Infusing Our Work with Gratitude..........................................239
Work as a Sacred Act: Creating Places of Healing..........................55
Healing with Intention..........................................................45
Improving Care One Person at a Time ....................................275
The Spiritual Side of Health Care..........................................294
Making Eye Contact ............................................................196
What Can the Great Religious Traditions Teach Us About Health Care? .. 227
By Caring for One Another, We Create a Culture of Care..............162
Reflect on the Immense Value of Our Work..............................210
How Feverish Activity Keeps Us from Practicing the Art of Caring ....231
Being a Force for Healing When There is No Cure........................87
The Stillness of Being a Healing Presence ................................170
Creating Ceremonies ..........................................................128
#d 297 D3
I M P ROV I N G O U R DA I LY WO R K L I F E PAG E
Going Beyond Your Job Description ......................................280
Honoring the Call to be the Best ............................................97
Taking Personal Responsibility for Patient Safety..........................63
It Takes a Team to Reduce Medical Errors ................................203
Having an “Attitude” About Patient Safety ..................................91
Applying New Ideas to Our Work............................................133
Our Work Matters: It’s All In Your Perspective..........................191
S H A P I N G O U R AT T I T U D ES AT WO R K PAG E
Doing What We Love..........................................................25
Being the Mayor of Your Own Corner of the World......................37
Making It Personal ............................................................233
Giving the Gift of Ourselves ................................................240
Bringing Anticipation, Re-Dedication and Celebration to Our Work ....173
Controlling the Future........................................................113
Changing the Mood with Our Words ......................................157
The Impact of Working with Soul ..........................................144
Valuing Creativity and Play ..................................................273
Work Differently, Not More..................................................98
Bringing Artistic Passion to Our Work ......................................242
Managing Fear..................................................................127
When Flowers and Praise Aren’t Enough ....................................176
It’s Easy to Make a Difference................................................269
Having Good Humor ............................................................136
Attitude Adjustment at Work ..................................................68
Being Present ..................................................................287
Reflecting on Life and How We Show Up for Work ....................252
Overcoming Negativity ..........................................................43
Overcoming Cynicism and Betrayal ......................................214
Being Open to New Ideas....................................................278
Avoiding Burnout................................................................48
Avoidance ........................................................................164
Expressing Empathy ............................................................194
#d 298 D3
LEADERSHIP PAG E
Leading with Courage and Faith ..............................................76
Going Beyond the Obvious ....................................................50
Influence..........................................................................31
The Impact of One ..............................................................95
Making Decisions ..............................................................282
Taking Personal Responsibility ................................................56
Updating Our Labels ..........................................................254
Making the Tough Decision to Leave ......................................236
T RA N S FO R M I N G A N D E N L I V E N I N G T H E WO R K P L AC E PAG E
Committing to Excellence ......................................................27
Transforming Failure ..........................................................122
Making a Resolution to Believe in Change................................115
Creating a Positive Work Climate ............................................181
Teamwork and the Restless Attitude to Excel ..............................155
Being on a Mission ............................................................213
Taking Pride in Your Work ....................................................141
Having a Shared Vision........................................................222
Earning Trust....................................................................106
The Power of Connecting with Colleagues ................................101
Having a Lasting Impact ......................................................146
Making the Ordinary, Extra-Ordinary ....................................220
Using Depression as a Motivation ............................................84
Using Performance Assessments to Improve Ourselves ................257
WO R K I N G I N PA RT N E R S H I P PAG E
Honoring Mentors, Being a Mentor ......................................266
The Life and Death Value of Teamwork ..................................223
Recognizing the Invisible Heroes..............................................77
Seeing the Saints Among Us..................................................267
Giving the Gift of Life..........................................................117
Community......................................................................207
Valuing Everyone’s Job ..........................................................58
Being Connected ..............................................................283
Making Your Job Influential and Meaningful ..............................86
#d 299 D3
R ES P EC T I N G A N D VA LU I N G O U R CO L L E AG U ES PAG E
The Need for Diversity ........................................................183
Respecting Inner Struggles ..................................................226
Fighting Prejudice Through Self-Reflection ..............................123
Embracing Diversity During the Holidays ................................138
Remembering that We Belong to One Another............................64
Considering the Patient’s Point of View ....................................39
Being Sensitive to the Hidden Lives of Others............................175
Needing to Connect ............................................................135
Respect: Taking a Fresh Look ................................................260
Two Holidays ....................................................................205
Honoring Unique Gifts ......................................................285
Finding Meaning in Volunteerism ..........................................250
Valuing Volunteerism ..........................................................159
Resisting New People, New Ideas ............................................271
Truly Listening ..................................................................193
Honoring Our Diversity ......................................................211
Seeing Beyond Stereotypes ..................................................230
Respecting Others’ Inner Stories ............................................54
B E I N G AU T H E N T I C AT WO R K PAG E
Courage to Speak ..............................................................109
Bringing Our Whole Self to the Work place ............................201
Honoring What’s Important and Being Present..........................272
Learning from Astronauts ....................................................234
Integrity in Action..............................................................263
Carrying Our Inner Lives to Work ..........................................160
Being Honest......................................................................66
Love in Action ....................................................................52
Expressing Our Uniqueness ..................................................177
Bringing Mind, Body and Spirit to Our Work............................185
Work and Intimacy ..............................................................93
Being More Than Our Professional Identity ..............................46
#d 300 D3
G RAT I T U D E PAG E
Working with an Attitude of Gratitude ....................................102
Gratitude Is a Gift................................................................83
Humility............................................................................35
Practicing Thanks-Giving on Thanksgiving Day ..........................29
Acting With Gratitude ........................................................247
Slowing Down and Feeling Grateful ........................................154
Expressing Gratitude Without Words ........................................73
Honoring Those Who Came Before Us ..................................289
U S I N G G R I E F A N D PA I N AS T E AC H E R S PAG E
Memorial Day: Learning from Those Who’ve Gone Before Us ......169
Rising Above Our Pain..........................................................59
Grief as Teacher ................................................................134
Facing the Questions that Death Brings ..................................244
I M P ROV I N G O U R S E LV ES , A N D O U R L I V ES PAG E
Being Strong and Vulnerable ..................................................41
Choosing an Attitude of Abundance........................................216
Keeping Life from Getting in the Way......................................125
Attitudes About Money Shape How We Treat Others....................166
Living the Life We’ve Been Given ..........................................248
How We Work, Not What We Do ............................................118
Embracing Feedback ..........................................................104
Continuous Learning ..........................................................65
Being Open to the Unseen....................................................261
Learning from Failure..........................................................174
GA I N I N G P E R S P EC T I V E PAG E
Honoring the Beauty and Sacredness of Our Surroundings ..........293
Using Tragedy and Illness to be Mindful of Life and Work ............187
Being a Human Being, Not Just a Human Doing ........................218
Being Open to New Ideas ....................................................208
Holding to Our Caring Convictions During Tight Financial Times ....197
Taking a Fresh Look at Our Life and Our Work ........................150
#d 301 D3
Stop and Breathe to Gain Perspective ........................................81
Keeping Perspective About Why We’re Here................................89
About the Authors
Through the Eyes of a Child ..................................................119
M A RT I N H E L L D O R F E R , D . M I N I ST RY
Embracing a Fresh Perspective ................................................74
Losing Perspective from Overwork..........................................140
Believing is Seeing..............................................................246 The primary author of Healing with Heart, Dr. Martin
C. Helldorfer, has the kind of education and work
T H E SAC R E D N ESS O F O U R WO R K PAG E experience that not only qualifies him to write this
The Sacredness in the Ordinary ............................................259 book, it has inspired him to write it.
ID Tags and “Uniforms” as Symbols of our Professional Ideals ......152
Making a Mark ....................................................................79
Martin is currently the Senior Vice President for
The Tradition of the Holidays in the Hospital ..........................286
The Saints Among Us ..........................................................199 Mission at Exempla Healthcare, a Colorado based
Spirituality and Work ..........................................................40 regional health care system. Prior to joining Exempla, he served in
The Power of Touch ............................................................33 similar positions, and as Senior Vice President for Human Resources in
Practicing the Art and Science of Medicine ..............................206 other regional and national health care systems—serving on Boards and
Awakening to the Sacredness of Life—and Our Work ..................296 often as an organization’s ethical and spiritual advisor. He is intimately
familiar with the inner workings of health care organizations.
AWA K E N I N G PAG E
Expressing Our Inner Lives ..................................................148
Martin’s experience working with employees within hospitals is extensive.
Waking Up! ......................................................................277
He worked for twenty years as a psychologist working within two special-
Living an Examined Life ........................................................61
Awakening to Our Lives ........................................................111 ized psychiatric residential treatment centers for professionals.
Standing in a Moment of Opportunity ....................................132
His two books, stemming from his clinical work, The Work Trap, and Prayer, A
Guide When Troubled, were in continuous print for fifteen years.

He holds a Doctorate in psychology (Andover Newton Theological) and

masters degrees in chemistry (Notre Dame University), religion and
personality (Duquesne University) and theology (La Salle University).

Dr. Helldorfer was a monk (De La Salle Brothers) for more than thirty
years. His background is rich; his words both challenging and affirming.
He lives with his wife in the Denver, Colorado area.

#d 302 D3 #d 303 D3
T E R R I M OSS

Terri Moss is an employee and marketing commu-

nications consultant with 26 years of experience.
She has worked for several of the premier human
resources consulting firms in the country, as well
as for a behavioral health care medical facility,
and presently runs her own consulting firm and
publishing house, Moss Communications. Her
clients include Fortune 100 companies representing the high tech, health
care, public utilities, finance and retail industries.

Her work experience has given her a unique understanding of the

particular challenges and stresses that health care professionals face.
Through her work and her extensive experience as a hospital volunteer,
she has developed a deep sensitivity to their particular challenges and the
environment in which they work. Her inspiration to pursue the writing
and publication of Healing With Heart comes from her deep commitment to,
and appreciation for the importance of clear communication among
employees and throughout an organization.

Terri has a long-held mission to create practical, everyday work tools to

help employees achieve a renewed attitude for their work; one that is
inspired and personally fulfilling. Terri has been an avid and devoted
meditator for 29 years. She lives with her husband, inspiring son and
wonder-dog and Therapy Pet, Cody, in the San Francisco Bay Area.

#d 304 D3