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    Good Writing is Like Good Sex: Sort of Sexy Thoughts on Writing
    Good Writing is Like Good Sex: Sort of Sexy Thoughts on Writing
    Good Writing is Like Good Sex: Sort of Sexy Thoughts on Writing
    Ebook149 pages1 hour

    Good Writing is Like Good Sex: Sort of Sexy Thoughts on Writing

    By C. S. Johnson

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    About this ebook

    What makes a book sexy?


    I'm not talking about erotica, per say, but what is the difference between a book you eagerly devour and a book you slum your way through? 

    While there are individual exceptions, the most objective difference between a good story and a downright terrible one is simple—it all comes down to the writing.

    It's either good writing, and we can forgive the technical flaws a little more easily, or it's bad writing, and bad writing is just bad.

    Good writing is more than just good writing. 
    Good writing is sexy.

    If you're a fiction writer looking to improve your writing skills, this is the perfect, provocative read to encourage you to get down to business and write your story. 


    Inside Good Writing is Like Good Sex, you will find:

    •A titillating perspective on the writing process 
    •The secret to why your story is special, and how you can make it sexier
    •Tips on romancing your readers
    •How to write irresistible characters 
    •Basic writing and story concepts with advanced insights


    … and all in a non-gratuitous fashion with a lot of innuendos. 


    C. S. JOHNSON is the award-winning, genre-hopping author of several novels, including young adult sci-fi and fantasy adventures such as the Starlight Chronicles series, the Once Upon a Princess saga, and the Divine Space Pirates trilogy. She has written articles for The Rebelution, MTL Magazine, Hollywood in Toto, StudioJake, and more. With a gift for sarcasm and an apologetic heart, she currently lives in Atlanta with her family.

    FROM THE BOOK:  

    "So, what's so special about your book?"

    It's still a terrifying question, but the more you see it, the better you can prepare to answer it.

    It might be hard for you to realize that your book is special at all, especially if you are a new writer, or you're one of those people who struggle with self-confidence (I can assure you from personal experience you are in good company). I know exactly how that feels.

    But your book will be special, because it's yours.

    It is your words written down on paper, your story written for the world to see, and the book you were born to write.

    It's yours.

    This is something that people tend to say about kids, and I like using this analogy here because kids can be the result of good sex, just as my "book babies" are the result of my writing. No one will love my real children the way I do. My kids are unlike everyone else's children because they are mine. And no one will ever love my husband the way I do, because he is the one I chose and the one who chose me back. Your own love story will be special because it's yours.

    Your book will be special too.

      

    WHAT READERS ARE SAYING:  

    "An absolutely brilliant, cheeky, and fun guide to writing better. Great for anyone tired of bland writing guides." ~ Liliyana, Book Review

    "Chock-full of useful writing advice, written by a woman who clearly knows what she's talking about." ~ Jessica, Author and Book Reviewer

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherC. S. Johnson
    Release dateMar 31, 2019
    ISBN9781948464277
    Author

    C. S. Johnson

    If you've enjoyed this book, please consider supporting me on Ko-Fi or subscribe to my Youtube channel!  https://www.ko-fi.com/writercsjohnson https://www.youtube.com/@writercsjohnson1 Every little bit helps fuel my book business! Supporters have early access to sneakpeek snippets, cover reveals, and ARCs -- and more, too! My website: https://www.csjohnson.me  Thanks again for reading! 

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      Book preview

      Good Writing is Like Good Sex - C. S. Johnson

      AUTHOR’S ADVISORY NOTE:

      Believe it or not, despite the title, this book is relatively clean. I do not talk graphically or personally about sex in this book. You do not need to have had sex to understand this book, and this book is not a reason for you to go and have sex, or more sex—just as reading about the history of drinking should not encourage you to go out and get drunk. However, since it is about sex in general, parents should encourage their younger writers-to-be to read something else. This book is, on average, appropriate for sixteen years of age and up, but I leave it up to the reader and possibly other appropriate parties to decide what is best.

      AUTHOR’S ADVISORY NOTE TRANSLATION:

      If you read this book and you don’t understand it or you are scarred by it, it’s not my fault for writing it; it’s your fault for reading it.

      This book is dedicated to my husband. I thought it was romance that would teach me about marriage, but it is marriage that has taught me so much about romance.

      This book is also for my most ardent fans. I have to apologize for some of the stuff I say in here, no doubt, but in all seriousness, and in all fun, thank you for your devotion to my work. It is such a comfort to me in dark days, and, during the sunny moments of my life, it makes my world shine even brighter.

      TABLE OF CONTENTS

      PREFACE: LET’S TALK ABOUT SEX, BABY! (SORT OF)

      CHAPTER 1: GOOD WRITING IS LIKE GOOD SEX

      CHATPER 2: A PERSONAL PREP TALK

      CHAPTER 3: IMPORTANT FUNDAMENTALS FOR DOING IT

      CHAPTER 4: NOVEL EXPERIENCES

      CHAPTER 5: GOOD SEX STARTS WITH GOOD ROMANCE

      CHAPTER 6: TENSION AND CONFLICT

      CHATPER 7: DON’T PICK YOUR NOSE WHILE MAKING OUT

      CHAPTER 8: GETTING KINKY WITH IT

      CHAPTER 9: FINISHING WELL

      CHAPTER 10: AFTERGLOW

      AUTHOR’S NOTE

      ABOUT THE AUTHOR

      ABOUT THE EDITOR

      SAMPLE READING

      *PREFACE*

      Let’s Talk About Sex, Baby! (Sort of)

      You Know You Want To

      Have You Ever had A Mental Orgasm?

      I always secretly smirk when someone tells me one of my books have given them all the feelz, because that’s when I have to stop myself from saying, So glad to hear my book gave you a mental orgasm.

      I would never actually say that. Never. Never.

      Aloud or to their face, anyway.

      I am a prude, after all, and anyone I went to high school with, perhaps especially my last boyfriend, will tell you so.

      But yes, in the merry-go-round inside of my mind, I use the term mental orgasm, and I think it’s funny. I also think it’s true, because good writing is like good sex.

      If you’ve ever read a book and it stayed with you as you closed the cover, if you’ve ever found a story that haunted you for days after you finished it, if you’ve ever been left simultaneously satisfied and still hungry for more of an imaginary world you left behind—chances are you have experienced a mental orgasm.

      Books can certainly blow your mind.

      As someone who writes books, and certainly as someone who wants to make an income from writing books, I have had a lot of people ask me about how to write a story and make it into a book, and this book is my edited, more tongue-in-cheek response.  

      Is This Book for You?

      I wrote this book because it’s something I think is true and funny, but I didn’t write it just to read my own thoughts back to myself. I can write fiction for that, and I would likely be more entertained if I did that; you may also be more entertained if you read my fiction books, which I highly recommend, if I do say so myself.

      I wrote this book specifically for people who want to become good fiction writers. While I have to admit you could also read this in hopes of being a better nonfiction writer, I doubt I would consider the following mix of wit and wisdom necessary if I was writing a dissertation or a master’s thesis. Maybe if you’re going to the Kinsey Institute, but other than that, this book was written with the intent to help storytellers tell better stories in a fun and irreverent, yet deeply respectful sort of way.

      Given that it is written by me and I am a prude, as I’ve already mentioned, this book is not graphic (See Author’s Advisory Note). I am a non-gratuitous fiction writer.

      However, given that the topic of writing is discussed in comparison to sex, and sex can be a difficult topic for some individuals to discuss (especially on a competent and mature level), this book might be better suited for a writer over the age of sixteen. There are, as I well know from my exemplary search engine skills, a lot of other highly recommended books out there that discuss the topic of how to write better without making silly innuendos every other paragraph or so.

      But, if you have taken adequate consideration of yourself, and you feel you are able to handle the topics of writing and sex in a theoretical, educational manner—then welcome to my book.

      I hope it gives you the satisfaction you are looking for.

      Let Me Entertain You

      Before I get into all the fun, and the funny parts of fun, I want to start off by reaffirming my foundation; I have taught English and writing in the classroom for many years on multiple levels, though never from this particular angle. From my teaching experience, I know the importance of doing it right, as it were.

      I am C. S. Johnson (CJ to my email buddies) and I am an award-winning, genre-hopping author of several novels. For a little over five years now, I’ve written fantasy, science fiction, historical fiction, and fairy tales, just to name a few of my favorite genres. I write mostly young adult fiction, but I have also written new adult fiction.

      Before I became a writer, I was a teacher. Teaching, like writing, is more of an art than a science. However, unlike writing, teaching was not a particularly joyful pursuit for me. My job eventually became a mountain I’d paid $60,000 or more to climb, only to get halfway up there and realize I never actually wanted to be there in the first place. As soon as I could, I tucked my teaching tools away in an honorable manner than my father never fully approved of, and turned to embrace writing as my true love.

      Like Gomer returning to Hosea, I have clung to that love. My very soul demands it after the punishment I have endured, prostituting myself as a teacher as long as I did. Since then, I have learned all I could from my experiences, all in hopes of honoring the thing that saved me from a life of internal dishonor and public damnation.

      Everything in this book is what I have learned from the culmination of my education, experiences, and observations, coupled with my own shifting sense of humor and paired with my ambition and passion. My ambition and passion are often synonymous, and I finally have learned to stop apologizing for them.  

      What You will Find in This Book

      This book works through the process of writing preparation, writing itself, and specific areas of content and story development. While there are many people who have asked me about publishing, that topic is very broad; it is like asking me about relationship advice, now that I am married. That’s part of the reason I find the similarity between writing and sex both appealing and amusing. From my experience, there are a lot of parallels we can enjoy learning from along the way.  

      The chapters

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