Girl Talk: Leaving the Past Behind You

Copyright © 2015 Wen Robins.

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Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright ©1996, 2004, 2007, 2013 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

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ISBN: 978-1-4908-6753-3 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4908-7163-9 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-4908-6754-0 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2015901104

WestBow Press rev. date: 3/3/2015

Contents

Acknowledgements

Preface

Chapter One Forgiveness – Leaving the Past Behind You

Chapter Two Energy - Surround Yourself with Positive Energy

Chapter Three Purpose - Define Your Destiny and Live Your Dream

Chapter Four Go For It! Step Outside of Your Comfort Zone

Chapter Five F-A-I-T-H - For All I Trust Him

This book is dedicated to my two favorite girls; my beautiful mother, and best friend, Dorothy Williams who I believe still watches over me from the Heavenly realm, and my favorite person in the whole wide world, my daughter, Jasmine Ahnie Harris.

Acknowledgements

My deepest gratitude:

To my mother, Dorothy Williams, who poured her heart into raising me to be the best woman I could possibly be and for helping me to raise my daughter, Jasmine, during her most impressionable years. I know you’re looking down with a huge smile on your face now that I have completed the re-editing of this book. Thanks for proofing the first copy Ma!

To my amazing daughter and encourager, Jasmine Ahnie Harris, who helped to edit the final copy of Girl Talk; thank you for your willingness to limit our conversations so that I could complete a chapter. I’m looking forward to seeing you on the big screen Jasmine Ahnie!

To my awesome Uncle Eddie – Eddie Williams - who has always been the wind beneath my wings. Thank you for reminding me to stay focused and for being such an encourager.

To my Awesome aunt, Ethel Mae Johnson. Thank you for your wisdom and never-ending encouragement, The sun will come out tomorrow!

To my other mother, Eudeen Scott, for being an integral part of my life. Thank you for always being there and for taking on the toughest task life ever assigned to me and sparing me of a daunting vision that would have lasted my lifetime. I am forever grateful.

To my best friend since high school, Adrienne Murphy, thank you for your endless enthusiasm and encouragement. I cannot believe you saved all of the revisions you made from the original version of this book in 2006. Thank you for making my job so much easier!

To my sister, Nina Laney-Boyd, thank you for your endless encouragement. Love you Madge!

To my Godmother, Arnetta Meyer, thank you for leading me to our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

To my dear friend, Charmaine DaCosta, thank you for your editing expertise on Girl Talk. Wishing you God’s best with Crude Food and Limation!

To Larry Adamson, for giving me my start in radio broadcasting. I know that you are Rejoicing with the angels.

To my dear friend, Crystal Harris, for naming this book and my next talk show. Thank you for your endless encouragement.

To my dear friend, Natasha Leath, for confirming, in 2012, that I was supposed to reedit and republish this book.

To my newest friend, Robert Washington, for confirming, in 2014, that the book was supposed to be finished two years ago. No more delays…

Lastly, no one’s ideas and thoughts are created solely from their own experiences. Therefore, I would like to thank the countless women who have shared their stories and testimonies with me throughout my years in broadcasting, ministry and everyday life. Each one of your stories has helped me to identify the areas in which we need empowerment. Thank you for your trust, love and encouragement.

Preface

From 2005 through 2012, I was an on-air radio host with a Christian radio station in the Central Savannah River Area (CSRA). I recall the day, early in my broadcasting ministry, when I was at the radio station and a prophet from Chicago was visiting the area for a crusade. He came to the radio station because he was scheduled for an on-air interview with one of my colleagues to talk about the crusade and his prophetic gift from God. Before his interview, in the midst of our brief conversation, he began to prophesy to me. He told me that I was called to the ministry and that I was going to be a powerful speaker. I received his prophesy as confirmation as the main reason I moved to Georgia was to answer the call from God to the ministry. But then he also said, One day you’re going to write a book and the book is going to bless many women. With all due respect, at that point I disagreed with the prophet and secretly questioned his prophetic gift. I replied, "I have been called into the ministry; however, regarding the book, I’m not a writer. He simply replied, That’s what you think." That was the end of our conversation. He went with my colleague into the studio to prepare for his interview, I left to go home for the day and we never spoke or saw each other again.

Less than one year after that conversation, Girl Talk was written. I could not believe the day I sat down to write this book. It was not planned, it was simply a feeling that came over me and I sat at my computer and started typing. While writing this book I wished I could remember the prophet’s name because I wanted to include him in my acknowledgements. The original version of this book was written in just three days. Upon its original completion I was awestruck at how swiftly my fingers glided across the computer keyboard as I had so much pouring from my heart that I wanted to talk to women about. It was an extension of some of the broadcasts I had produced and aired in the past. And there is still more to come.

My purpose for writing this book was simply to encourage women. I have been blessed with the spiritual gift of exhortation and one of my prayers is that while reading this book you feel like you’re talking with a friend; one who is rooting for you to fulfill your heart’s desires and God’s plan for your life; one who wants to help you remove any obstacles that may have been placed in your path by your limited and debilitating thoughts or by the individuals who keep reminding you of the mistakes you’ve made in your past.

Though reading this book will cause you to laugh, cry and ponder about your life’s experiences, the decisions you have made in your past and the decisions you are still making today, in the end, my prayer is that you gain the confidence you need to know that you can accomplish anything that God inspires and your heart desires. I also pray that you begin to believe in yourself, believe in the power of God’s grace and his blessings and become empowered to fulfill your life-long aspirations.

Throughout the book, I use fictitious anecdotes that reference intimate relationships for emphasis. Know that my beliefs are that God created sex to be experienced between a married couple, one man and one woman, only. Sex outside of the Biblical definition of marriage, including homosexuality, adultery, and other sexual relationships outside the marriage bond are a sin in the eyes of the Lord. Repentance must be made for these actions in order to live a life in Jesus Christ.

I pray that my testimonies, humor and God-given wisdom throughout this book are comforting, confirming and a blessing to you so that you become all that God has destined you to become. Nothing is impossible with God. You may have done some things in the past that you’re not proud of (most of us have) or are living a lifestyle with the distorted viewpoint of this is common in today’s society or with the excuse that you were born this way - the Good News is that you can be Born Again! No matter what mistakes you may have made in your past or present, know that you can still reap the rewards of God’s perfect plan and prosperous future for your life by confessing your sins, confessing with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believing in your heart that God raised him from the dead!

Chapter One

Forgiveness – Leaving the Past Behind You

We hurt for countless reasons. We sometimes hold on to pain that can evolve into bitterness, guilt, anger or shame. We have been broken and deceived by those who professed their love to us. We have emotional wounds from the past that linger – seeming to never heal and scars that never fade away. The pain from these wounds invade our thoughts and the scars are often reminders of the past that often cause depression, interpersonal challenges, self-hatred, bitterness and dysfunctional behaviors.

Betrayal

We had fathers, stepfathers, brothers, uncles and family friends who thought nothing of stealing our innocence through sexual abuse. Why did they violate us like that?! We trusted them and they robbed us of our innocence. Now people talk behind our backs about our promiscuous behaviors and they call us awful names when, in fact, it was because of the violation(s) that we now have self-destructive behaviors. Some of us recklessly engage in sexual behaviors while others completely avoid intimacy. When we finally mustered up the courage to tell someone we trusted about what we experienced; our mothers, aunts and other family members failed to provide us with the protection, safety and comfort we were seeking. Instead, they became angry with us when we cried out to them for help. We were seeking their love, advocacy and protection, but instead they accused us of lying and replied with renunciations such as, That did not happen! And some of us were and still are indoctrinated into almost believing that we are, in fact, mistaken and that the abuse could not possibly