Victoria's Nest: Sequel to Prairie Preacher

Victoria’s

Nest

Sequel to Prairie Preacher

by

P.J.HOGE

iUniverse, Inc.

New York Bloomington

Victoria’s Nest

Sequel to Prairie Preacher

Copyright © 2010 by P. J. Hoge

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

This is a work of fiction. All of the characters, names, incidents, organizations, and dialogue in this novel are either the products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.

iUniverse books may be ordered through booksellers or by contacting:

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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any Web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

ISBN: 978-1-4502-6326-9 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4502-6327-6 (ebook)

Printed in the United States of America

iUniverse rev. date: 10/18/2010

This second book of the Prairie Preacher series revisits the families of Pastor Byron and Elton fifteen years later.

Look for the next book in the Prairie Preacher series, Rainbows and Rattlesnakes. It follows the Merton clan through even more adventures.

This book is dedicated to Louella Lange. Mrs. Lange was a wonderful and dedicated teacher who taught in the rural schools in Burleigh County North Dakota, instilling an interest in education and the love of learning to all her students.

With special thanks to Marie, Dorie, Sally, Sandy U, and the two Louises for all their encouragement, patience and advice.

Contents

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1

Victoria gave herself a critical look in the mirror, ‘Well, I guess my blood shot eyes won’t matter that much. After all, it is a funeral. Maybe the folks will just think that I’ve been crying.’ She pinched her cheeks to try to get some color back into her pale face.

She brushed her long, light brown hair gently and let it hang down her back. A dull pain still throbbed in her head and she was fighting back the nausea.

‘Way too many Salty Dogs,’ she admonished herself. ‘I really have to lay off those things. And those cigarettes! Ick! My hair just stunk this morning. I can’t believe why anyone thinks those cigarette warnings on the packages would stop someone from smoking! If you wake up and smell your own hair and it doesn’t make you quit, nothing will.’

She was indecisive as to which dress to wear for the funeral. She had a black mini dress or a long granny dress that was dark brown. ‘I’d probably get killed if I wore the miniskirt. Hmm, I guess I can take them both along. I’ll be wearing my jeans the rest of the time anyway,’ she mumbled to herself.

Her attention turned to the radio. It was announcing that the Supremes would be having their farewell live concert that week. Diana Ross was leaving the group. The station played a few of their hits. Soon, Victoria was singing along to Baby Love. When the station played Where Did Our Love Go?, Victoria got tears in her eyes.

It made her think of EJ and how messed up everything got before he left for the service. They had been friends since grade school. She had always assumed they would someday marry. She wondered what would have happened if they had not had the big argument a few weeks before he left for basic training. She would give anything to live that over again. She hadn’t heard from him since.

She felt her parents were somewhat relieved, since they never seemed to like him very well. They thought he was too old for her. She had just turned eighteen and he would be twenty four in a couple weeks. It seemed to make no difference that there was quite an age difference between the two of them. Her Mom was a lot younger than her Dad.

Ah, parents are all hypocrites, she muttered to herself. Guess they were all saints in their day. They don’t understand anything. Just because they grew up in the Stone Age! Boy, would they have a fit if they knew about last night. If Dad even heard the word ‘pot’, he’d go ballistic. Well Twiggy, we will just have to make sure that he doesn’t. Right, Kitty?

The purring cat rubbed against her leg while the young girl filled her dish. I have fixed up your food and water. Your litter is all changed so you’ll be fine this weekend. I know that you don’t like it when I leave, but I really have go out to the folks’ this weekend. You’ll be okay.

The telephone interrupted her conversation with the black and white cat.

Oh. Hello, Mom. I was just packing for home. How are the roads? Dad’s gonna need to change my oil.

It is really quite nice, but cold. Her mother said, It’s supposed to be well below zero tonight. I hope you are wearing something warm and bring your boots along. Don’t just wear tennis shoes.

Yes Mom, I am. Sheez, give me some credit for a few brains, will yah?

I have no doubt about your intelligence. It was just a reminder. The forecast is for clear and cold, so we will just have to keep our fingers crossed it doesn’t start blowing. Can Megan catch a ride out with you? Would that be okay?

Ah, Ma, Victoria groaned.

What’s wrong with Megan?

Nothing, Victoria answered, I like her, but I didn’t want to come out like with a whole family thing, like a little kid.

Little kids don’t drive, her mom said seriously, And Megan needs a ride because Marty has to work tonight.

Okay, I will, Victoria reluctantly gave in, But Dad better change my oil then, if I have to be the family bus service.

Watch it there, little lady or you’ll be hoofing it. I’m sure Dad will change your oil but you had better not ask him that way. You aren’t planning to cause another scene this weekend, are you? Please don’t, not with the funeral and all. Everyone has enough to deal with.

Well, it isn’t like it was a surprise or anything. Good grief, she was seventy-nine years old! She’s been sick for a long time. You said yourself it was a blessing.

Victoria, I can’t believe you said that! She was always so good to you.

I know, Mom. I loved her. You know that, but let’s get real. She was old.

I don’t want to have this conversation with you, young lady. Just give Megan a call and bring her out. See if you can be nice, her mom was trying to control her anger.

Victoria knew she had overdone it. I’m sorry, Mom. I didn’t mean to cause trouble, she replied, with questionable sincerity. I did love her and I’ll miss her. I really didn’t mean anything by it.

Well, her Mom changed the subject, I’d better get going here. I have a lot to get finished before tomorrow. Your brothers should be home later tonight. I hope that you get here early enough so you can visit with them.

Of course, Victoria snapped back, Anything for them. I can change my schedule for them because I don’t matter anyway.

Good bye, Victoria. I will talk to you later. Hopefully you will have a better attitude, her Mom replied with frustration.

Victoria slammed down the receiver. ‘Visit with your brothers! They could care less about visiting with me. Not once did she ask how I was! I could be half dead and she wouldn’t care, especially as long as the boys were there. They are all she ever cared about."

She went back to packing for the weekend and feeling very defensive. She just never seemed to be able to do the right thing for her Mom. She could never please anyone in her family. She was always the one doing something wrong.

About a half an hour later, Megan Elizabeth called, Hi! What are you up to?

Victoria swallowed hard and was unable to answer. Her mind was racing. ‘Dog gone it, I forgot to call her. I hope she doesn’t tell Mom.’

All she was able to utter was a weak hello.

Megan continued, I don’t know if your Mom got in touch with you, but I’m really in a jam. I would like to bum a ride out with you today. I know it is short notice but Marty found out he has to work tonight. Can you pick me up? I’d love to buy you a burger before we left town. How does that sound?

Oh, you don’t have to do that! Of course, I’ll to pick you up. I hate driving out there all by myself anyway. It will be good to have company.

Thanks so much, Megan giggled, You are the best cousin in the world. What about the hamburger? What time were you planning on heading out that way?

Oh, in about half an hour. Is that too soon? Actually, a hamburger was sounding very good about now, since she hadn’t kept anything down that she ate earlier.

It sounds great. I will be ready. I will look forward to seeing you then.

Victoria packed the rest of her things and put her bag in the car. She cleaned the paper wrappers from the drive-in out of the back seat and left the doors open so the car could air out.

Megan was a lot of fun but a pretty straight shooter. She was six years older than Victoria and always seemed to have it together. Of course, why wouldn’t she? She had an Ozzie and Harriet life, not at all like hers. Her own life was more like the Twilight Zone. She didn’t think Megan would rat on her but she would probably give her a heck of lecture if she knew about last night. Victoria wasn’t in the mood for another lecture. After all, she would be spending the weekend at home. She would be talked at enough.

After cleaning out the backseat of her car, she picked up her mail on the way back into the apartment. There was a letter from her Grandmother Grainger. Victoria tore it open excitedly and sat on the sofa without taking her jacket off. She loved getting letters from her Grandmother Grainger, which she had done almost twice a week since they were out for her graduation this past spring.

My Dearest Victoria,

How is my precious little girl? Your grandfather and I were just sitting here looking at your beautiful graduation picture again. You are such an attractive child. You bring us joy every time we look at you.

We still remember how wonderfully you sang at your graduation. You have a magnificent voice, not unlike your father. If you were here, there would be many more opportunities to make a career in music if you were interested. I’m afraid where you live, there isn’t much to offer. But then your parents would probably not want you to have that kind of life anyway.

It is dreadful that you have that limp, but maybe the best surgeons could repair it. Then you could walk beautifully again. We know how much you would want that.

I certainly wish that your mother would allow you to accept help from us so that you wouldn’t have to work so hard. It is too much for you. If you were here, we could take care of everything for you and you could have spending money besides. You are wearing yourself out this way. Grandfather and I worry about you. It isn’t good for a young girl like you to have to work so hard. I imagine it is difficult for your parents to stretch their money to provide for all those boys and then you, too.

I hope that your grades don’t suffer because we fear that your parents would not continue to pay for your schooling. If you were here, we could guarantee that your school would be all paid. You could be a part of society and meet all the best people and have the best opportunities. We don’t think that your mother harbors any resentment toward you about her disabilities; she is simply unable to give you what you need.

Please accept this hundred dollar bill from us. It would be better if you did not mention any of this to your mother so she does not feel inferior. However, we don’t feel that it is fair that you should have to pay for your mother’s ill advised decisions.

Our hope is that you can come to see us soon. Maybe you would consider coming out here and staying with us next year for college. Then you could be with your real family and not that odd collection of people you live with. If you were here, you would have a real family.

All our love,

Grandmother and Grandfather

‘Wow!’ Victoria thought, ‘That would be wonderful! At least someone appreciates how hard I work. Yes, Grandmother Grainger, I will think about it. I don’t know how I could break it to Mom and Dad, but I will certainly be thinking about it.’

She did not have time to write to her Grandmother right then, but planned on answering her letter on Monday when she got back from her parents. She would have plenty of time to answer her on semester break the following week.

She put her $100 in her top drawer to save for the parties over semester break. She thought she might also do a little shopping next week. She really liked those new vinyl boots she saw in the magazine the other day.

With that, she gave her cat a hug and locked up her apartment. She would make it to Megan’s in about fifteen minutes.

2

Victoria was pleased as she pulled her ‘63 red Chevy into a parking spot almost directly in front of the door to Megan’s apartment. As she went into the hallway, she could hear Megan’s stereo belting out the strains of Aquarius by the Fifth Dimension.

Victoria grinned. Megan was not into the modern scene so it always baffled her that she liked the Fifth Dimension. She was much more the John Denver-Anne Murray type.

Hi, Megan smiled as she opened the door. What are you grinning about?

Oh nothing! I got a great parking spot. the younger girl giggled. I’m just starving and can’t wait to eat.

Me, either. Which would you like flying-style pizza burgers at Jumbo’s drive in or a Log House burger plate? I could go for either. Or I could be convinced to eat something altogether different. I’m famished today.

Let’s stop at the Log House, since it’s on the way out of town? Okay? I just love their onion rings, Victoria’s mouth was almost watering when she thought of them.

Sounds good to me. Just let me grab my stuff. Oh, Jen asked me to bring the punch bowl out to her. Do you have room?

Sure, we can put it in the back seat. How is she feeling?

Good, I guess, Megan’s dark blue eyes filled with joy. Just think. I’ll be an auntie soon! My weird brother will be a daddy.

Victoria laughed, Yah, that is hard to envision but then he would be a better daddy than my brothers!

Megan brushed her dark brown hair from her tanned face, Oh, I don’t think so. They probably think the same of us, huh?

You and Dick must be getting serious? Victoria asked.

Yah, pretty serious. He’s coming back from Grand Forks this weekend. I haven’t seen him since Christmas Day. We are thinking about setting a date, probably when he gets out of school. We are glad now that he got drafted right away out of high school, so that is behind us now. Have you guys heard from your brother yet?

Not unless Mom did. He will be home on leave before he heads off to Vietnam from what I heard. ‘Course you know how that goes. She is so worried about him!

She has reason to be. Vietnam is not a nice place to be right now.

Victoria was sorry as soon as she said it. Megan certainly would side with her Mom. She changed the subject. Where’s your goofy cat? What’s her name again?

Tinker. She should be around here someplace. She got into my necklaces yesterday and had a ball. It took me almost two hours to get them untangled!

Victoria grabbed the calico cat and gave her a hug, Tinker the Stinker.

After the cat was fed, the girls put Megan’s bag and the punch bowl safely in the car and headed off to the Log House.

They found a good booth near a window and placed their orders. They had just received food when a familiar voice interrupted their chocolate milk shakes. A young couple had stopped as they walked by their booth.

They do have the best shakes here, Denise Jensen giggled. And my rear end shows it! I just chugged down a strawberry malt.

I like your rear end, Eddie Frandsen complimented his girlfriend, These girls are so skinny, they could use a few more shakes to my way of thinking? What do you weigh there, Pipsqueak? Fifty pounds?

I wish! Victoria giggled. I am so short that one pound looks like twenty. I wish I was as tall as Megan.

I am only 5’5. How tall are you anyway?"

Just barely five feet, Victoria groaned.

Well, it looks good on you, Denise grinned. Are you on your way out for the funeral, huh? Heard Pastor Olson will be doing the service.

Yah, we will be heading out as soon as we finish eating, Megan answered, I didn’t know that Pastor Olson was going to do the service. Makes sense though.

Well, Eddie took Denise by the hand, We had better get moving. I have to stop by the grocery store for Mom on the way out. She asked me to pick up a few things and gave me list a mile long! Hey, did you hear that EJ got home today from boot camp? It will be good to see him again. Did either of you hear where he’ll be stationed? Nam or Germany?

Megan took a bite of her onion ring, I think Mom said it was Germany, but don’t put any money on my word. Everybody is getting sent all over, so it is hard to keep track.

I bet Hill is hoping its Germany. I know I would be, Denise offered sympathetically.

Yah, I would be, too. Well, we’ll see you guys this weekend. Have fun at the grocery store! Megan waved good-bye.

Victoria’s mouth had become so dry she could hardly swallow her milk shake. After sloshing it down with a gulp of hot coffee, she asked Megan, Why would Hill care where EJ was sent?

Didn’t you know? Hill and EJ were going together for almost six months before he left for basic training. I thought you knew. I think they’re quite serious.

Victoria started to choke and took another swallow of coffee. I guess I had better mind my eating rather than talking, before I choke to death. It’s a good thing I always have coffee with my milk shakes!

I guess so!

The rest of the meal, Victoria was grateful that Megan was in as talkative mood. She talked and Victoria tried to pretend she wasn’t about to scream.

All that she could think about was that crazy old song, Make the World Go Away that Eddie Arnold had made popular a few years back. She really wanted to make the world go away right now. She tried to act interested in Megan’s talk about her nurses training but was having all she could do to keep from crying. She couldn’t wait to get alone, so she could do just that.

After they got back in the car to head out of town, Megan turned to her and said seriously, Is something wrong? I feel like you are upset about EJ and Hilda. I thought you knew that EJ and Hill had been going together for some time. I know you had a crush on him when you were younger, but I thought you were over it by now.

‘How come,’ Victoria screamed in her mind, ‘When I like someone, it is a crush? When someone else likes somebody, it’s real? They all treat me like I am five years old.’

Victoria put the key in the ignition and turned out onto the highway before she answered, I did like him and it was more than a crush. He liked me, too. We cared about each other, but there is someone new in my life since I started college. You don’t know him. He isn’t from around here.

Oh, that sounds exciting. What is his name?

Victoria had to think fast, His name is Gary and his family is from Michigan. He is a cool guy.

How did you meet? Do you have a lot of classes together? Is he majoring in Biology also? Tell me all about him, Megan was as eager as Victoria to get on a happier subject.

We have some classes together. He wants to be a pharmacist. He is really good-looking and is a lot of fun.

I am so happy for you. I can’t wait to meet him.

Thanks, Megan. I hope you’ll get to meet him soon.

About an hour later, the girls pulled up in front of Jen’s house. Megan hopped out and grabbed her bag, while Victoria brought the punch bowl. Jen answered the door and invited them both in. Time for a quick Coke?

Danny came up from the basement and gave both girls a hug. How are my best girls? Still chasing men?

Of course, I am. Victoria giggled, But your sister here is about to settle in.

I heard that, Danny grinned at his sister, You’ll end up barefoot and pregnant like Jenny here.

Oh Dan, the very pregnant Jen raised her eyebrows and looked at her young , good looking husband, I remember you promised to keep me in shoes when we got wed.

Yah, I lied. Danny teased and then gave his wife a quick kiss on the cheek, "Well, ladies. I have to go watch the end of my soap, All My Children before I go feed cattle." He took a handful of cookies and disappeared back into the basement.

Does he really watch that new soap opera? Megan laughed, shaking her head.

Yes, ever since it started a few weeks ago! Your brother is an addict! Don’t know what he’ll do this summer when the field work starts. I may have to lock him out of the house! the young wife answered with a giggle.

Victoria visited about the arrival of the new baby and all the family news for a couple hours. It was fun visiting with them, but it was time to head on to her home. Her Mom would definitely be looking for her by now and she didn’t want to start everything out on a bad footing, especially since the conversation that morning.

3

Victoria had to admit that she was happy to see the old two-story farm house where she grew up. There was always something comforting about it. She made up her mind to be as nice as she could to her wacko family. They were good people and always did what they thought was best for her, even though she strongly disagreed on what that would be. She knew she could count on them.

When she was little, she used to talk to her Mom a lot, but since she became a teenager, she didn’t talk to her so much. She could talk to her Dad easier than her Mom, but then she had never talked to him about the same things that she talked to her Mom about. She wondered if she should try.

As she put her bag on the kitchen floor, Mom came over and gave her a hug. I was beginning to get worried.

Oh, I stopped at Jen’s for a while. She invited me to have a Coke with them. I told them I had to get going, but I couldn’t very well just drop Megan off and run out, Victoria said defensively.

No, you couldn’t. How’s Jen doing? She is due pretty soon, huh? In a couple weeks? Her Mom continued, not biting on Victoria’s attempt to start a confrontation.

I think she said three weeks or less, Victoria replied, She’s big as a barn and her poor feet look so swollen. Her little toes look like baby sausages.

I bet she’ll be glad when it’s over. After you put your things in your room, could you help me set the table? We’ll be eating as soon as Dad’s gets home.

Oh, I was hoping that Dad could change my oil before he came home tonight. I know he won’t have time tomorrow and I am planning on heading back early on Sunday.

Gee, I was hoping you could stay later on Sunday so we could get some time to visit. I hardly get to see you anymore. Honey, if you want your Dad to change the oil tonight, you’d better call him right away. He may have already left. He wanted to close the shop as early as possible.

The phone rang several times before her Dad answered, Hi there. I was just thinking about you. Did you have good roads?

Oh, yah. They’re fine. Hey, could you change my oil right away if I bring the car in? I know you won’t have time tomorrow and I am planning on going back early on Sunday.

Well, I was just getting ready to turn the lights off; but sure, if you bring it in right away. I don’t want to sit here all night. It’s too darned cold.

I’ll be right there. Love you.

She ran to her room and threw her bag on the bed. On her way out, she kissed her Mom who had just answered the phone. Sure, she is just heading out the door. I’ll let you speak to her.

Victoria took the phone while giving her Mom a questioning look. This is Victoria.

Hi, this is Eve. Some of us kids were getting together tonight and were wondering if you could join us. EJ is home from basic and we wanted to spend some time with him. We are going to meet over at the bowling alley in town about eight. Everyone will be there. Think you can come over?

Depends on what the folks have planned. I’ll try to make it. Thanks, Eve. Victoria hung up the phone.

What was that about? Mom asked as she put a clean table cloth on the table. Victoria helped her smooth it out.

It was Eve. A bunch of kids are getting together at the bowling alley tonight to see EJ. He’s home on leave. They wanted to know if I would come.

Well, that sounds like fun. Dad and I wouldn’t care.

I know, Mom. I just don’t know if I want to go.

Honey, why not? It will be all your friends, her Mom flashed a look of concern.

I have to run now. I don’t want to keep Dad waiting. He was getting ready to come home when I called, Victoria avoided the subject.

Okay. See you two in a little bit.

Victoria did not want to tell Mom that the thought of seeing EJ and Hill together just made her stomach turn. What was she going to do? If she didn’t make an appearance, everyone would wonder why. She would probably not be able to handle it if she did show up. Victoria hoped something would come up so she wouldn’t have to go. She fought her tears all the way to Merton and tried to regain control before she turned into her Dad’s service station and garage.

As she drove up to the back of the shop, Dad opened the car door and met her at the car. When she got out of the car, he gave her a hug. How’s my favorite girl?

Fine, she answered trying to be cheerful while she hugged him back. Where do you want the car?

I’ll drive it in for you, he said as he smiled at her. Then he stopped and gave her a worried look. What’s wrong? Looks like you just lost your best friend.

Instantly, she started to cry. She didn’t want to, but the tears just bubbled over and down her face. She couldn’t stop. She sure didn’t want to do this.

Her Dad was stunned. What is it? What’s wrong?

You can’t help. You’d just think I’m stupid, Victoria sniffed.

Dad gave her a grin, We are all stupid about some things. You know, it’s usually that kind of stuff that makes us cry the most. So, what are you stupid about?

Ah, you’d just tell Mom and I know she would think I was just a silly kid.

Now, silly is totally different, the man smiled. Then he looked at her seriously and said, Look, if you don’t want me to tell your Mom, I won’t, unless I clear it with you first. Deal? But I have to close this garage door before we both freeze to death.

Victoria nodded and went into the shop while Dad brought the car in, drove it on the lift and closed the door. She sat on a bench near the back of the wall close to the heater. He went over to the pop machine and gave her a questioning look.

A Coke, please, she nodded through her tears.

He got her a Coke and sat down next to her on the bench. Here, want a handkerchief? I only used it twice!

Victoria looked at him and took the clean handkerchief. He always tried to make her smile. He really was a good stepdad. She often wondered what her real Dad would have been like. She was so little when he died that she had no memory of him. She knew that her stepdad liked the boys better than her, but he was good to her. Maybe her real Dad would have liked her better than the boys or at least as well.

Clutching her Coke bottle, she leaned on his arm and he put it around her.

So, what’s bothering you? he asked softly as he gave her a hug.

Eve called and invited me to the bowling alley tonight to meet up with all the kids.

Her Dad frowned, That’s a good thing, right? I don’t understand.

Well, it’s so we can all see EJ. You know, he is home from basic.

I thought you liked EJ.

I do. The tears flowed afresh. This time she didn’t even try to contain them. Through her tears she blubbered about how much she liked him, how he was going with Hill, how people thought she was a baby, how they had a fight and how nobody took her seriously.

Dad patted her shoulder and let her cry for a bit. Then he said, Okay, let’s see if I can figure this out. You threw a lot of stuff out here, so I am a little befuddled.

Victoria tried to pull herself together and then blew her nose. After she finished, she handed him the handkerchief.

He looked at it, then at her, and grinned, Consider it a gift.

Victoria giggled. I know you think I’m just a dumb kid. There’s nothing to sort out. No, just forget it. Really. I’m sorry I mentioned it. I don’t want to talk about it now. I’m better now, anyway. Thanks for listening. I’ll be okay.

I doubt that, her Dad gave her a matter-of-fact look.

What do you mean?

No one gets that upset and gets over it that fast. I can’t force you to talk about what is bothering you, but we both know you won’t be able to cover up whatever this is for very long.

Victoria studied his face. She really did want to talk to him but was afraid that he would find out more than she wanted him to know. Then he certainly would never like her as well as the boys. However, she couldn’t stand it anymore.

Finally, she asked very quietly, What if you don’t like what you hear?

Dad looked at her, absorbing all that she said and then answered quietly, There isn’t much that you could do that I haven’t tried myself at least once. Don’t let anybody kid you, nobody’s perfect. Not even you, so don’t be sitting there pretending that you are or that you even should be. Okay? Don’t get the idea that everyone else will be surprised to find out that you’re human. Most of us already know that and we love you anyway. Now, I’m going change the oil and you can decide if you want to talk about it or not. I don’t want to pry it out of you. It’s up to you to decide. I will say, for myself, I think it is usually easier to have someone else know about it than to mess it up on my own.

But you have Mom. You guys talk about everything.

I didn’t have your Mom for years. I remember how hard it was to try to figure everything out on my own. It isn’t that easy. What you are trying to do is tough. Real tough.

Victoria watched as her Dad went under the car and began to drain the oil. She knew he was right. She wouldn’t make it through the whole night without losing it and so far, couldn’t figure out a way to get out of going to the bowling alley. The problem was she didn’t want her Dad to think badly of her either. She couldn’t stand that. She had been tormented for months now and felt that she was about to explode. What if she had burst out crying like she just at the bowling alley? Megan had picked up on her feelings in just a few minutes, so she knew she couldn’t handle an entire night of it. She sat there deep in thought while he finished the car. Victoria had a lot to think about while she sat there.

Dad changed the oil, checked the fluids and the air in her tires. He lowered the car on the lift and then opened the trunk to check the spare tire. He looked at her around the open trunk and said, Maybe you need to come here for a minute.

4

Her mind was cataloging everything that she had in the trunk and what she had taken out. She didn’t think there was anything in there that would get her in trouble but she couldn’t be certain of that either. On the way to the car, she felt like she was taking the last walk to the gallows with the parson. Her Dad just stood there, expressionless and watched her as she came toward the car. She was dying inside. With each step toward the car, she felt her face get hotter and redder.

One look in the trunk and Victoria’s face went from crimson to ghostly pale. There at the bottom of the trunk rolling gently back and forth was part of a bottle of vodka. Her body turned to a pile of cold mud and she was unable to think or move. She could not take her eyes from the gently rocking bottle and she certainly did not want to look at her Dad. It seemed like an eternity before he reached down and picked up the bottle. It was thoughtful of you to bring me a present. I think I’ll take it home and save it for a special occasion. Would that be okay?

Victoria nodded numbly, still avoiding looking at him. It isn’t what you think.

What do I think?

I don’t know, she started to cry anew. I could just die. I want to go. Can I just leave?

Nope, don’t think so. Her Dad was definite, We need to talk.

Victoria reached into her pocket to pull out the handkerchief and as she did, the pack of cigarettes she had secreted there, fell out. The pack slowly floated to the floor as if in slow motion onto the concrete. She quit breathing and thought she might collapse. What a hell of a day this had been and it looked like it wasn’t over yet.

Dad looked at the pack on the floor and back at her. She thought he would really yell at her, but instead he burst out laughing.

I don’t think you have to worry about ruining your image anymore! Come on. Let’s sit down before you have a heart attack. You might want to bring your cigarettes. I think this could be a while.

Walking back to the bench, she tried to find the words to justify her behavior and instead became angry that she had to explain. She was certain that no one ever made her brothers explain what they did.

I suppose I’m going to get a lecture. I guess I deserve it. Before you start, I want you to know that I know that the boys aren’t saints either. You think the boys are so good and never have done anything. Well, I know better, she argued defensively as she followed him back to the bench.

He motioned for her to sit down. He put the vodka on the work bench and sat down next to her. We aren’t talking about the boys. Is there anything else in your car that you could get picked up for? You can’t be driving around with an open container. You will end up in jail—and your Mom will definitely find out about that!

There was a slight feeling of relief when he said that. She hoped that meant he wasn’t going to tell Mom. She had never, ever been in this much trouble before in her life. She nodded feebly, I don’t think so.

Well, before we go home, we’ll check it all over and make sure. I don’t think you’d look so good in jailhouse stripes.

Oh Dad, she started to cry again. This time she cried so hard that she couldn’t even light her cigarette. She was shaking uncontrollably.

He lit a cigarette and handed it to her and then lit one for himself. If you are going to be a tough cookie, you are going to have to quit with the waterworks. The really tough gals take their lumps.

She stopped crying and looked at him in shock. What?

You heard me. If you want to play with the big boys, then learn to take your lumps. That’s part of the game. You can probably get away with it with me because I’m your dad, but it won’t work with a policeman or your new friends.

What new friends?

The crowd you’ll be running with pretty soon. You know, the Hell’s Angels.

Victoria smiled weakly, I’m not that bad, Dad. Just a little booze and cigarettes and stuff.

The Angels all started with the little stuff, too. They didn’t drink vodka in their baby bottles, but eventually, you’ll get there. It’s easy to do. Came close myself.

But Dad, I’ve never seen you drink.

No, I guess you probably haven’t. I quit before your Mom and I got married. But by then, I had drunk more than my fair share. I had wrecked nearly everything that mattered to me and almost messed it up with your Mom. The good Lord had to save my butt more than once.

Victoria giggled. You’ve never been that bad. You’re such an establishment church-goer type.

Her Dad broke into laughter. Oh, my girl! It took me forever to get my ducks in a row. And honestly, they’re still out of the pen most of the time! Then he got serious again. Booze is nothing to mess with. Doesn’t bother some folks, but it doesn’t do anybody any real good. For me, it’s bad news. My dad died from cirrhosis of the liver. Your Mom’s brother committed suicide because he was an alcoholic. I’m not about to tell you what to do because you wouldn’t listen anyway. Every generation has to learn for themselves that the stove is hot. However, if I find out that you are driving around with open container or drunk, I will pull the keys on your car. That’ll be the end gate. No warning, nothing. It will be all over but the shouting.

Dad, you wouldn’t, Victoria started to whine.

I would, no discussion. You can get a car and insurance all on your own. I wouldn’t try to stop you, but you’d have to do it by yourself. Got it?

She barely nodded and then answered dryly, Yes Dad. I got it.

This is the only warning. Do you know that I mean it?

Yah, she mumbled and then said out loud without even thinking, I bet you’d never say that to the boys!

Huh? her Dad broke into laughter again, You are sadly mistaken there. All three of them got skinned at some point and they all thought they were being unmercifully picked on.

But they still have a beer or something once in a while.

I didn’t say you couldn’t. No open container, breaking laws or driving drunk. I’d just as soon you never drank, but that is a choice that you have to make for yourself. I am not in charge of that. It’s your life, so it’s your choice. You have to live with the consequences.

Okay, Dad. I won’t break any laws. I promise I’ll try not to drink. I just get into trouble when I do anyway.

What do you mean, get into trouble? her Dad asked.

Well, I might as well tell you. Like last night, I went to the Jumbo’s drive-in and ran into these guys from college. Gary is a way cool guy from Michigan. Anyway, the next thing you know, we are all in my car and driving around. His friend had the stuff for Salty Dogs. Then when that was gone, he got some more grapefruit juice and vodka. I didn’t know that they had some junk.

Her Dad gave her a quizzical look, Like what junk?

Pot, she answered almost without sound. Really Dad, I didn’t know they had any. Honest. When I found out about it, I didn’t want them to think I wasn’t cool so I never said anything. If I had been sober, I would have said something. I should have, I know. I know I should have.

She watched his face which was without expression. She figured she had finally done it. He wouldn’t ever be able to forgive her, now.

He shook his head and leaned forward on the bench. Then he leaned ahead and held his head in his hands. My little girl, he said as his eyes started to tear up, What the hell kind of a world are you growing up in?

Dad, it’s nothing really, she tried to comfort him, putting her arm around him. Everyone uses it. Well, not everyone, but a lot of people do. It’s really no big deal.

It is a big deal. You could go to prison for that. Do you realize that? Do you smoke it a lot? I mean, like every day? Do you really think that it is a good thing to do?

I know it isn’t. Besides, it didn’t make me feel any different. Dad, I just tried it once. It was nothing, honest. I have never tried it again. Really and I won’t ever again. I promise. I don’t want you to hate me, she looked at him pleadingly.

I don’t hate you, but I’m really concerned about this. I will believe you. I will take you at your word. Please don’t let me down. Whatever made you think that you wanted to try it?

Well, I don’t know. I just did. Everybody else was doing it and said it made them feel good. So, I tried it but I didn’t feel any different.

Why do you want to feel different? What is the matter? Don’t you feel good?

Oh, it’s a lot of stuff, she started to cry again. I just feel like I don’t belong anywhere. I don’t fit in, you and Mom like the boys better than me, I don’t have a boyfriend and everything I do is always wrong.

Hmm, I guess I wouldn’t like feeling like that either, Dad said as he thought about it. Gosh, we love you, Pepper. Mom and I love all you crazy kids but each one of you is different. Of course, we treat you differently. You’re all different people. If we did treat you all the same, you wouldn’t like it! You don’t treat Mom and I the same.

Well, that would be silly, Victoria pointed out. You are a guy and you like tools and stuff. Mom doesn’t, A flash of realization came over her, Oh, I get it. I see.

She sat and thought a minute and then finally and quietly said, But Dad, your business says Schroeder and Sons. It doesn’t say anything about me. None of the boys work in the shop anymore, so why do they get to have their names up there?

Oh Pepper, her Dad put his arm around her and kissed her forehead, I’m so sorry.

And please don’t call me that little kid’s name. I’m grown up now. I need to go by my real name.

Victoria, you only turned eighteen a few weeks ago! I’ve been trying to call you Victoria, but I’ll always think of you as my little Pepper. That is the first thing that you said to me when we met. You said you liked the name Pepper better than Victoria.

I know, but I was a little kid then.

As far as the shop name, he continued, You may be right. I just never thought that you had an interest in it. All the boys worked here at some time or another. I never knew you wanted to be a mechanic? I could use a tough cookie like you to help out around here! Doug and I can hardly keep up. The stupid Army keeps drafting everybody!

Victoria giggled, No. I think I’ll be happier being a physical therapist.

Yah, probably so. The pay isn’t much, but you’d meet lots of guys here! her dad laughed. You may not believe this, but I was a boy myself once. I know that there are a lot of guys who think you are a pretty neat gal. Maybe they just haven’t got around to telling you yet, but I can recognize it when I see it. Give yourself some time and don’t fall for the first guy that sweet talks you.

Maybe, but everyone else has a boyfriend.

Not everyone, her Dad said seriously. Remember, it is better to have the right one than just to have one! It’s not much help to have a dog that bites you. And you do fit in. You grew up here. You have lots of friends and a family that loves you.

Dad, we are freaks! We aren’t a real family. Everybody knows that. We are just a bunch of pathetic losers. Everybody in the whole county knows that! Don’t you know that?

His face became a study. "Why on earth would you say that? You guys are my real family, my only family. We have been a family for a long time. I