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    Humanity Was Delicious
    Humanity Was Delicious
    Humanity Was Delicious
    Ebook43 pages1 hour

    Humanity Was Delicious

    By Ubiquitous Bubba

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    Starving. Relationships with the other were-creatures have been strained since I ate the last human being on Earth. Now, the only food source left on the planet are were-folk, and we taste terrible. Unfortunately, we have a more immediate problem. How are we going to get off of this alien ship?

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherUbiquitous Bubba
    Release dateSep 25, 2014
    ISBN9781310242373
    Author

    Ubiquitous Bubba

    Ubiquitous Bubba (if that's his real name) spends a significant amount of time surrounded by imaginary characters from bizarre universes. He's been known to hold conversations with animals, inanimate objects, and food. These discussions frequently diverge into philosophy, speculations on Reality/Unreality, and the proper role of cheese in society.  Growing up in Texas, he studied the lore of the Storyteller, the mysterious art of the tall tale, and the pervasive universal existence of Bubbas. They're everywhere. As he wandered universes, he discovered that there's always a Bubba around when you need one.  Ubiquitous is also a drummer, who has somewhat narrow and specialized musical tastes. A fan of progressive and hard rock styles, he's also known to incorporate some funk just to keep himself entertained.  Ubiquitous Bubba enjoys relaxing at home with his wife and kids. He enjoys telling stories, eating pizza, and holding the recliner down. It hasn't gotten away yet, but one can't be too careful.

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      Book preview

      Humanity Was Delicious - Ubiquitous Bubba

      Humanity Was Delicious

      Ubiquitous Bubba

      Copyright © 2014 Ubiquitous Bubba

      All rights reserved.

      ISBN-13: 9781310242373

      Ubiquitous Edition

      Ubiquitous Edition, License Notes

      This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

      Bubba Books

      Short Stories:

      The Imaginary Invasion - ubiquitousbubba.wordpress.com/the-imaginary-invasion/

      Humanity Was Delicious - ubiquitousbubba.wordpress.com/humanity-was-delicious/

      The Other Universes Series:

      Reality Challenged - ubiquitousbubba.wordpress.com/reality-challenged/

      Blithering Genius - ubiquitousbubba.wordpress.com/blithering-genius/

      One

      Humanity was delicious. I mean, they were drool inducing, stomach growling, and lip smacking good. Some days, I almost wish I hadn’t eaten the last one.

      Scowling, I sat on the bench swing on the porch, sipped my coffee and gazed out at the woods behind my house. Something uneasy twisted and fretted in the marrow of my bones. My muscles twitched and the hair on my arms stood on end. A light breeze slid over the hills, slinking between the trees and tiptoeing across the yard. I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply. The scents untangled and paraded across my brain. The Puget Sound’s mild aroma fainted to the background. Among the overwhelming pine fragrance, I picked up traces of deer, bears, squirrels, chipmunks, and other pseudo-animals. If I really worked at it, I could ignore the stench of the werepigs next door.

      I hate werepigs. They’re obnoxious, arrogant, and they taste terrible. To be fair, all were-folk have one thing in common. Our flavor is absolutely horrible. I mean, you have to be starving to eat another were-person.

      That’s the problem, of course. We’re starving. I ignored my spasming stomach and sipped my coffee. I fought the urge to slip into my wolf form and help myself to my other white meat neighbors. A werewolf has to have some self-respect, you know.

      I slapped at the back of my neck. Knock it off, Karl, I snarled. A mosquito flew to my side and shifted. The swing rocked as a human-shaped form landed.

      Karl grinned. You should have seen your face, dude. I shrugged. He always said that. I pointed at the extra mug of coffee on the patio table and he scooped it up eagerly. He closed his eyes and inhaled the steaming drink. Man, I can’t remember the last time I had some of this stuff!

      It was yesterday, Karl. We do this every morning. I tossed a towel over his bare legs. Modesty was not a common quality in most were-creatures.

      I can’t remember that far back, Karl said, just before burning his mouth.

      I know what you mean, I answered. It wasn’t Karl’s fault. Were’squitos aren’t known for their memory. I don’t understand time, myself, I added.

      A heavy clawed paw sprang to my

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