Forgotten And Destined

Forgotten and Destined

BOOK ONE OF THE FORGOTTEN SERIES

BY CATHY TUCKER

COPY RIGHTS 2015 CATT.

Published at Smashwords

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PUBLISHER’S NOTE:

This book is a work of Fiction Names, Characters, places and Incidents are products of the Authors Imagination or are used fictitiously. Any Resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons living or Dead is entirely coincidental.

This book has some Language/ sexual content and is recommended for ages sixteen and up Thank you.

Table of Contents

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Chapter 28

Chapter 29

Chapter 30

Chapter 31

Chapter 32

Chapter 33

Chapter 34

Chapter 35

Chapter 36

Chapter 37

Chapter 38

Chapter 39

Chapter 40

Chapter 41

Chapter 42

Chapter 43

Chapter 44

Chapter 45

Chapter 46

Chapter 47

Chapter 48

Chapter 49

Chapter 50

Chapter 51

Chapter 52

Chapter 53

Chapter 54

Chapter 55

Chapter 56

Chapter 57

Chapter 58

Chapter 59

Chapter 60

Chapter 61

Chapter 62

Chapter 63

Prologue

We have to do this Summer, It’s the only way to keep her safe.

Harris she belongs with us. We’ve only had her a few days. How can you even think about letting her go? Summer cries, tears pouring down her face.

I know honey, it’s killing me too. But they’ve broken into the Keeper's World Summer. If any of them get her… Think what they will do to her.

Summer gazes down at her beautiful daughter tears falling from her face onto the baby's forehead. Looking back up at her husband she declares Harris she’s never going to know who we are, how much we love her.

I know honey Harris says wrapping his arms around his wife pulling her and his child into his arms.

Summer you must listen to me, we will always watch over her. These are loving people you handpicked them. They will give her a good home.

I know Harris but this is killing me. She’s going to hate us. When she turns eighteen and finds out her whole life has been a lie. She’s never going to forgive us.

You don't know that Summer. Remember she’s a Keeper; she has the heart of a warrior which is forgiving above all else. She is our daughter and being so makes her braver, stronger, one of the best warriors the heavens ever created. She will hold forgiveness, kindness, love, humanity all in her heart. I can feel it Summer. One day she will rule the keepers and our world but until then it’s up to us to make sure she stays safe.

Let’s do this. The longer I hold her, the harder it is for me to think about letting her go. Summer wells with apps solution to her voice. Harris kisses his beautiful wife on the head looks down at his daughter takes her small hand in his as tears run down his cheeks.

Bending down he places a single kiss to his daughter's forehead whispering I love you Angel, we will be counting the days until you return to us. Letting go of his daughter's hand he looks at the bedroom of the couple's house, his wife has chosen to raise their daughter. Their names are Kristie and Raymond Parker. Summer has this ability to see inside a person’s heart she knows if they are filled with hate, anger or goodness and love, she says the love this couple shares, the kindness in their hearts; they are the couple to raise our child. Taking a deep breathe he holds up his left hand, with a wave he speaks the word nursery, watching as the new room forms before his eyes. Walls with bright colors Angel’s everywhere. On one wall he places a mirror image of the city on their world. The mirror looks like it’s made of gold as does their city. You can make out people walking around on the streets with angels walking amongst them their wings spread in holiness and superiority.

Harris it's beautiful. I can’t believe you put a picture of our world on the wall Summer says running her fingers over the image.

I hope as she grows she will gaze upon this mural and maybe… somehow sense a connection to her home. Turning away from his wife, Harris lifts his hand again when he speaks this time it’s with confidants and command to his deep voice. "This house shall be a haven for my daughter. The Parker's will know her only as their daughter. All people the Parkers come in contact with from the past, the future, as well as the present will know this child as the Parker’s daughter. She will be known as Malaya Summer Parker; not a neither nor demons will know of her existence. Upon her eighteenth birthday, the Parkers along with all people she has ever come in contact with will cease to know of her existence. She will then return to her rightful home. Take her legitimate place in the Keepers' world as Princess Rain Summer Livingston World Keeper. Her powers will begin to immerge slowly as she grows closer to her eighteenth birthday. Upon midnight of her eighteenth year, all her powers will ascend upon her commanding, her body, her heart, her soul. Feeling her with the powers only she is meant to hold, she is our daughter the princess of the keepers world the future ruler of all neither’s and keepers. The ruler over evil, she will fight to protect all human kind. Hell will rule the day she was ever conceived. She will be one of the most feared keepers of all times. All I have proclaimed will come to pass. Harris lowers his hand and motions for Summer to bring forth their daughter his heart is heavy splintering into a million pieces, knowing this is the last time he will hold his baby girl.

Summer kisses her daughter, tells her she loves her more than life and she will always be watching over her. Then she places the baby in her husband's arms. Harris walks over placing the baby in the crib he created. The baby begins to cry as if she knows something is wrong. She acts like her heart is breaking as much as her mother and fathers is. Harris leans over the crib whispering to his daughter Live my beautiful girl be happy. Be free let nothing in this world hold you back. You are the best of me. There is nothing you can’t do, you are my princess I love you The baby continues to cry as Harris walks back to Summer wrapping his arms around her he declares one word Home.

Chapter 1

Have you ever had the feeling something isn’t right? I've had that feeling for the last two weeks. I've been noticing some freaky crap going on with me. At first, I thought it was just me being clumsy but looking down at the bedroom doorknob I’m holding right now I’m beginning to have my doubts about that. The metal is smashed together so tight you’d never know it was a doorknob if you didn’t know it to begin with. UGH! What is wrong with me? No one should be able to do the shit I’ve been doing the past couple of weeks. I bet I could get in the Guinness book of records for F’ing up doors. Yep in the last two weeks I have literary broken nine doors. But most of the times it’s just been the knobs but on three different occasions I cracked the freaking wood. That is so not normal. I know that much, but what am I supposed to do about it? It’s not like I can go to my parents or my friends and say Hey I think I might have super powers. Watch what I can do to this door. Yea I could see that going over without me getting a trip to the local hospital. I have been thinking though if I decide not to go to college, I can always become a weight lifter. I’ve seen these commercials on TV for female weight lifters they make a lot of money. I try picturing myself telling my parents Hey guys I’m not going to college. I’m really strong so I’ve have decided I’m going to become a weight lifter. My mom would try to be supportive while my dad would be having a coronary. Laughing at my own crazy thoughts I shake my head choosing to forget it all for now.

I’m turning eighteen tomorrow. Three days later I graduate from high school. God that sounds great I'll be an adult no more high school. I’ll have summer off before starting college. Tonight, my two best friends are taking me out for my birthday. Tomorrow, my family will be having a party for me but it is a family only event. So tonight, I'm going to party with my friends. My parents think I'm going to be staying overnight with Angie. Angie Knight and Liz Bristle are my best friends; I love them like they're my sisters. We have been friends…well I don't really remember a time when we weren't friends. Tonight they are taking me to the city we are going clubbing. Well not really clubbing I think to hold the term clubbing you have to be going to numerous clubs. We are only going to one club as far as I know but it sounds cooler to say we are going clubbing rather than we are going to a club. See the difference? I've never been in a club at all. I’m really hoping they don't ask for identification. Angie says she's been there before and they never asked her for ID so she says we have nothing to worry about. Guess we will have to wait and see. Laying the doorknob on my night stand I head down stairs knowing I’ll find my parents in the kitchen.

Hey I say walking in the kitchen. My parents look around at me, but my dad is the first to speak.

Lana I want to make sure you remember the rules about drinking.

Without giving me opportunity to reply he continues to talk. To be honest, that’s for best I hate lying to my parents, which I will be doing if I tell them I won’t be drinking. There’s no way I’m following the no drinking rules tonight. I don't drink much but if I get in the club I’m definitely getting my drink on.

Lana hello do you hear me?

Sure Dad I hear you I reply knowing full well I have no idea what he said.

Hey Mom don't forget I'm going to be staying with Angie but don't worry I'll be home for our family birthday party. Yea I know, I said I hate to lie to my parents but what can I say sometimes a girl’s got to do what a girl’s got to do. Angie reserved us a room last week. After we discussed we were going to be drinking, there is no way we would drink and drive. Personally I think that shows our maturity. I watch as mom shuts the oven door; she is baking my birthday cake for tomorrow. She turns towards me

Your cousins will be getting here at seven tomorrow just be home by then.

I’ll be here before seven I can't wait to see Jules and Beth it's been what six months? I question. My mom's name is Kristie Parker; she's a social worker and to me, the best mom in the world. She’s beautiful, tall, and slim with long blond hair hanging past her shoulders its cut in layers around her face setting off her blue eyes. She doesn’t look anywhere near her age. She is thirty nine but looks closer to twenty nine. I have always wished for my mother’s hair color instead of the red I got stuck with. People tell me they love my hair they say it’s beautiful. As much as I hate the red I have to admit my hair is one of my best qualities. At least it’s not bright red. Actually it’s more of a brown with red highlights. That’s what I like to think anyway. But it is super thick and it lies in waves down my back. Matter fact I have to move it out of the way when I sit down or I’d be sitting on it all the time. The only thing I sort of got from my mom is our eye color we both have blue eyes, however the blue of our eyes is completely different the blue of my eyes resemble the blue of the sky while the blue of my mother’s eyes run more towards a mix between blue and brown making the color of her eyes look hazel sometimes. But our close eye color is the only thing I have ever been able to find my mom and I have in common so I hold onto it with everything I am. I am pulled out of my thoughts by the sound of Mom’s voice.

It's more like eight months since we saw them.

Really? I asked. It’s been that long? Hmm…well I can’t wait to see them.

Lana my dad calls Have you thought any more about what you’re going to take in college?

No Dad I haven't. I’ll worry about that later right now I want to enjoy myself, have some fun with my friends. I'm turning eighteen. Graduating high school all I want to do is enjoy my right of passage.

Well you need to decide what you’re going to do. You are turning eighteen tomorrow along with turning eighteen comes responsibility. Part of which is being an adult. Being an adult is acting responsible it all goes hand in hand. I’m not sure rite of passage has anything to do with it though.

Raymond stop-this right now. Leave her alone let her have fun right now. God she can deal with college after summer is over. Sweetheart you are right you do need to be enjoying your rite of passage My mom pats me on the back as her eyes shoot daggers at my dad. Score one for me.

Lucky for me my dad does what my mom told him and he never mentioned school again. My dad is Raymond Parker; he is a history teacher at the community college. He’s uh… little bit uptight he always wants everyone to have all their ducks in a row. He gets upset with me a lot because I never have my ducks in a row. I’m doing alright if I can even find the ducks he’s talking about much less have them in some type of freaking row. Dad is tall and slim he has dark hair with the smallest amount of gray mixed in. His round glasses makes him resemble an older Harry Potter. My parents are total opposites in every way, the planets must have been lined up in my poor old dad favor it’s the only plausible explanation as to how someone like my nerd of a dad ended up with a hot chick like my mom. Yep my mom is a MILF. You would never know they’ve been married for twenty-three years. Not with the way they are always making out. Hanging all over each other all gods time trust me when I say before walking in any room in my house you better make sure to make a lot of noise otherwise you might see and hear some shit that could scar you for life. Gross I know. I’m just glad my mom saved me from yet another lecture from my dad on how I am the oldest child in the family yet for some reason; beyond him, I'm always the one that acting like the youngest.

I hear Angie's car pull up and my excitement begins growing by leaps. Running to the door I yell I’m coming. Watching as Angie and Liz both shout hurry up throwing their hands up in the air. Leaving the door open I run upstairs grab my overnight bag run back to the kitchen give my mom a hug telling her I love her at the same time. My mom finally releases me after whispering in my ear to have fun tonight she tells me not to worry about anything it’s my night enjoy it. We smile at each other in that moment I’m almost positive she knows what we are going to be doing tonight but she alright with it. Weird huh? Walking over to my dad I kiss him on his cheek then place my arms around his neck hugging him. I tell him I love him. My dad hugs me tight telling me he loves me, he says he’s sorry for starting in on me about school. Then he tells me to go have fun just be careful.

Thanks Dad I love you too don't worry I’ll be careful I promise him as I end the hug and pick my bag up. With one last goodbye to my parents I’m out the door. I take off full speed for Angie's two thousand seven yellow convertible PT Cruiser I jump in the back seat. The three of us let out a squeal knowing we are going to have the time of our lives tonight. Bonus no freaking parents.

Hey guys look I got the new boots. How do they look? I question holding my left leg up, I have been dying for these boots for the past three months so my mom and Aunt Judy took me to the mall yesterday and bought them for me. They are black leather with three-inch hills the leather comes up past my knees I think they go great with my black hip hugging jeans and low cut black belly shirt but Angie and Liz are the fashion guru so their advice is a must. When you lack any fashion ability at all you learn to depend on the friends you have been blessed with that have true fashion guru abilities.

OMG you got them. I can't believe you got them. They look fantastic, shit Lana when did you become so hot? The green eye shadow with the black eye liner is killer the whole emo black dressed thing you got going on looks freaking amazing on you and of course your fabulous hair is gorgeous as always. I swear to god I might be developing an actual girl crush on you. Oh the boots are awesome too. You do realize if you had been listening to Liz and I years ago you’d been getting laid a lot more.

Shut up Angie let her alone not everyone is the slut you are. Not everybody has to have sex five days out of the seven days in the week.

Says the virgin Angie says then burst out laughing at the lazier beams shooting from Liz’s eyes.

Lana you look fantastic honey you are the only person I know who is able to dress in all black but wear green eye shadow and be able to pull the shit off like a runway model. The boots are Fucking awesome too. The whole time Liz is speaking she is still shooting lazier beams towards Angie.

I laugh at the both of them. They are crazy. Trust me when I say they love each other to death it’s just hidden with all the arguing they do with one another. Liz may not be able to pull off the green eye shadow but why would she want to? She has blonde hair hanging past her shoulders like my moms, she doesn’t wear makeup nor does she need to she has a natural beauty about her. I look over at Angie she is so different from Liz or I she has jet-black hair her naturally dark skin comes from her Mexican heritage. Her makeup is on heavy her black eye liner setting off her deep drown eyes. Where Liz and I are tall and slim Angie is short, curvy. Guys fall all over themselves trying to get her attention and she knows it too.

Angie backs out of my driveway the wind blowing in our hair the music blasting from the radio as we all sing alone to some stupid song laughing as we turn onto the freeway.

Hey Angie yells over the music. Are we going to the hotel to put our things away first? Or heading right to the club?

Liz and I yell back motel first then start laughing. It doesn’t take long before we are entering the city. We see the sign for the motel come into view. Angie pulls in the parking lot stopping in front of the office. We all jump out of the PT running inside excited about the night ahead. We are laughing making fun of Liz’s boomed attempt at flirting with the guy behind the check in counter as we walk back out. We pull the car around until we find our room number then Angie parks in the empty slot in front of the room door. While Angie unlocks the door Liz and I grab our things.

As soon as we walk in the room we drop our bags grasp hold of one another as we scream the three of us jump up and down knowing we pulled it off. My parents think I’m staying with Angie, and Angie's parents think she is with Liz, and I hate to say it but Liz's parents are loaded with money they are always gone plus they could care less about Liz. As long as whatever she is doing doesn’t interfere with what they’re doing they are alright with it. It’s sad because Liz is a great person she has a huge heart no thanks to her parents. The way I see it, it’s their loss they are missing out on knowing someone very special. We are still laughing when we grab up our makeup bags head making our way to the bathroom mirror each of us squeezing in front of the limited space in front of the mirror making sure we look perfect before we head back out. After freshening up we are out the door back in the PT headed for our night of adventure.

CHAPTER 2

We pull into an over crowed parking lot in front of the club we notice the line to get through the door is a mile long hens the over crowed parking. Angie finds what has to be the only available spot to park in the entire lot. It also happens to be the one spot farthest away from the club. Oh well who cares we are here we made it and tonight is going to be great. It’s going on seven o’clock so it’s beginning to get dark. There are a few guys checking us out as we head toward the back of the line. I am smiling at one guy when I hear it the first time. Someone calling my name, I turn around praying to God it isn’t someone who knows my parents. I search everywhere but see no one. Looking back at Liz and Angie, I question them if they heard anyone calling my name. They both say no then Angie tells me it’s just my nerves getting the best of me. Thinking she’s probably right I join the conversation they are having about college. After a while, the line starts to move a little. I begin walking forwards when I hear my name called again. Looking around I catch sight of three people across the street looking at me, two guys one girl.

One of the guys is staring at me in a way that makes me feel like he can see straight to my soul. I feel cold chills run up my spine. Liz looks at me noticing my eyes glued across the street, she asks what I’m staring at as her eyes follow mine.

Ah I see what you’re looking at she replies. Angie turns to see what we were talking about

Oh my God that has to be one of the best-looking guys I’ve seen in my life. If I’m reading him right Lana, I believe he thinks you’re the best-looking thing he’s ever seen in his life. Angie laughs at her on stupid joke.

My eye's leaves the three people across the road before pinning both my friend’s eyes with my own desperately begging. Didn't you guys hear them calling my name?

They both shake their heads no. Do you know them? Angie asked.

No, I don’t know them. I answer my attention going back across the road. I know I heard one of them calling my name it was a male’s voice so that leaves the girl out. My eyes lock directly on the guy I said was staring at me like he could see my soul our eyes meet neither of us breaking eyes contact he is beautiful he has blond hair cut into a cute shaggy style he’s muscular but not in the bulky way of uh body builder no his frame is more the built of a fighter I’m positive if he lifted his tight gray tee-shirt up I’d be able to count the abs from here. The shirt appears to be tight enough I might be able to see his abs though the shirt if he were closer. His wide shoulders appearing as it might burst from the too tight material entrapping them. His dark jeans ride low on his narrowing hips. His long legs supporting his six plus foot frame. I know without a doubt it’s him I hear, I’m not sure how I know call it intuiting I guess. How do they know me? How does he know me? Why are they standing over there watching me instead of introducing themselves if they want to speak to me? I break eye contact looking away for a second but then my eyes unwillingly seek his out again but he’s gone that fast, one second he is there but he disappeared in the time it takes me to look down at my boots then back up again. I search for him without luck but I do see the other guy and the girl looking towards me. Getting Angie’s attention I tell her to look at them and how they are watching me."

Hell Lana Angie says the girl probably dates Mr. Gorgeous she saw the way he was eyeing your fine ass; I might be wrong but I’d say she is pissed off at you. Even as we speak she is deciding the best way to kick your ass without her having her hottie of uh boyfriend getting pissed towards her. The other tall glass of water over there is wondering which girl he is going to get lucky with tonight he’s checking every female here out. Now come on you need to calm your ass down. Turn around stop staring over there before we end up in a fight before we even make it in the club.

I roll my eyes at Angie, but I would hate for the girl to think I am checking out her boyfriend. Still in the back of my mind something about those people scares me. I don't care what the girl thinks I reply

Trust me I’m not the least bit interested in her guy.

Yeah sure you’re not Angie says while Liz laughs. So if they come in the club tonight and she’s not with Mr. Gorgeous, you don't mind if I go after him, then right? Angie questions with a smirk on her beautiful face.

If he’s your type go for it…I could care less. I tilt my head enough I can look across the street using my peripheral vision to see if he is back, there he stands looking at me. I return my gaze back to my friends trying to forget about the three people on the other side of the road. The line begins moving again this time we finally make it to the front. The door guy is a hot, so I give him a big flirty smile. He smiles back at me. It doesn’t take long before our flirty smiles have turned into full blown flirting. I ask him if he will be at the door the entire night. He tells me he gets a break in a couple of hours, so I tell him to come look me up. He opens the gate to let us go through but takes me by the hand before I can go. He tells me he will find me in a couple of hours to save him a dance. I tell him I’ll be waiting before walking away from him.

Oh my God Lana, Liz says her voice excited "you have as much brass as Angie does.

Laughing at Liz, I respond to her if you see something you like you have to go for it, girl; and I got to tell you there was nothing there not to like my god he’s hot. We both laugh at my craziness as we walk into the club.

I hear my name called again. However, this time it’s spoken aggressively instead of softly, I decide to ignore it. I’ve decided in the last second I must be losing my mind or it’s the whole nerve thing either way I can’t do anything about it right now so I’ll worry about it tomorrow. This place is great the lights are like the old disco light's you see in the old movies on T.V. All the colors coming from the lights are fantastic. The music is blasting from the speakers people are everywhere dancing, drinking having a blast. For the first time in my life, I am going to be part of it. Sure Liz, Angie and I have gotten drunk together a few times at Liz's house while her parents were away. This is completely different for one thing, there are guys everywhere secondly, there are guys everywhere, thirdly did I happen to mention there are guys everywhere need I say more? I think I’ve died and gone to Heaven I yell over the music. Angie is pointing to an open table. I nod my head letting her know I see. We make our way to it sitting down but I can feel my body swaying to the music making it nearly imposable to keep my ass on the seat.

God I can't wait to get on the dance floor Liz yells.

I know how she feels I’m ready to jump out of my freaking seat. Angie sees the waitress coming around so she holds up her hand waving her to our table. The waitress takes our orders smiling kindly she tells us she’ll be right back with our drinks. No sooner has she left than a couple of cute guys ask if either of us want to dance. I decide I’d rather wait on our drinks to arrive so I tell my friends to go ahead.

Are you sure? Liz questions.

Yes I’m sure get your ass out there and start shaking it before I change my mind. With that said I watch my two best friends step in front of the guys leading the way to the dance floor. The waitress returns with our drinks within minutes of them leaving the table. Thank you I say to her as I pay for our drinks making sure to add a decent tip in. I turn my beer up taking a huge gulp from the bottle. By the time Angie and Liz come back to the table I’ve finished off two drinks. I’m beginning to feel a small buzz from the alcohol so I’m joking around with the girls about the guys they were dancing with. We are all laughing having a fantastic time. Several guys come up asking if want to dance, but we tell them no thanks but maybe later. By this time we are in the girl zone you know the place where you are having more fun with your girlfriends than you possibly could be having with some unknown guy. Another half an hour goes by we are all buzzing now making everything funny. I feel someone touch my back. I turn around seeing the door guy smiling down at me. I give him a big smile in return.

Guy's I think I'm ready to dance now I say standing up from the table. Muscle guy takes me by the hand leading me to the dance floor. The music is fast and loud. I love it. I close my eyes letting the music take me over. I love to dance, I’m good at it. I open my eyes smiling at Mr. Muscles before turning my back to him I grind against him. I feel his hands go around my waist pulling me closer I smile enjoying myself.

I hear it again my name being called out in an angry tone making the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. I must admit to me I’ve been dealing with all this shit pretty well but this time I’m about to freak the hell out. The voice does more than call my name this time it speaks to me. Yep I’m positive a white coat is in my very near future. The voice is demanding to know what the hell I’m doing, but it goes even further than that in a hard tone it asked me if I was trying to get myself raped then it proceeds to insistent I stop dancing before I get someone killed" My eyes pop open, I feel chills run through me. I know it’s him I’m positive if I look around I’ll find him, he’s here I feel it. All three of them are here I’m not sure how I know this but I do it’s like I can feel them. I know it doesn’t make since but there hasn’t been much in my life making since in the last couple of weeks. Chills run through my body as my eyes scan the crowed of people searching for them. It doesn’t take long for me to find what I’m looking for his six foot frame holding a beer his friends standing next to him. He’s standing at the bar his eyes on me, he’s looking beyond angry.

Chapter 3

With the way he is watching me not to mention the voice I keep hearing I find I’ve lost interest in dancing, for that matter I’ve lost interest in my muscle man as well. I tell Mr. Muscle, I am feeling sick he leads me from the dance floor back to my seat sitting down beside me. He stays with me until his break ends making sure I’m alright. Before he leaves to get back to his post he tells me to come find him if I get feeling better. I thank him promising I’ll find him in a little while. I know I’m lying to him when the words are leaving my mouth but he’s really nice he doesn’t deserve to be treated with such little respect from me but right now I can’t help it I’m losing my mind here. I have no intentions of looking for him later. All I want to do at this point is sit here for a while then tell my friends I’m really sick so they will take me back to the motel where I can lay down.

Maybe this is all in my head. I remember studying on mental conditions in health class at school, some disorders can make a person think they are being watched by strangers it also make you hear voices in your head. I’m going freaking bat shit crazy. This has all been building up for the last two weeks all the signs have been plain as day I choose to ignore them, instead I made up excuses. My god I really had convinced myself I’d been breaking doors.