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    The 4Cs of Relationships
    The 4Cs of Relationships
    The 4Cs of Relationships
    Ebook71 pages2 hours

    The 4Cs of Relationships

    By B. Yvonne Lee

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    About this ebook

    The 4Cs of Relationships is neither a marriage counseling book nor a guide to fairy tale love. Instead, it is for anyone looking to objectively assess their romantic relationship by asking the right questions at the right time. Key questions like, is my relationship healthy? Is it unhealthy? Is it where I want to be long-term, why or why not? Are my needs being met? Do I feel valued?

    The 4Cs decision-making framework has been lauded as sensible and relatable because it challenges individuals to evaluate their relationship through a different lens. One that begins with identifying their separate needs and then those of the all important third entity, the relationship. The 4Cs gives couples a common vocabulary and simple tools to use as they understand why things may or may not be working.

    The 4Cs of Relationships isn't about having another conversation on dating. This book forces people to have the RIGHT conversation about their relationships!

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherB. Yvonne Lee
    Release dateNov 4, 2015
    ISBN9780989916493
    The 4Cs of Relationships
    Author

    B. Yvonne Lee

    B. Yvonne Lee is a daughter, sister, aunt, and friend. A marketing professional by trade, her career has literally taken her all over the globe and back again! As such, Ms. Lee developed a love for domestic and international travel and experiencing different cultures. Living, working, and dating across cultures required her to make some significant life adjustments and develop a healthy level of curiosity and respect for the local way of life. This process of developing as an individual while learning to appreciate cultural differences and remaining true to herself, planted the seeds for the 4Cs of Relationships framework. Ms. Lee, a graduate of Florida A&M University's School of Business and Industry, enjoys a life full of excitement in New York City.

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      Book preview

      The 4Cs of Relationships - B. Yvonne Lee

      The 4Cs of Relationships

      ringandheart

      B. Yvonne Lee

      The 4Cs of Relationships

      First edition copyright © 2015 B. Yvonne Lee

      All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the prior written permission of the publisher.

      Published by Mynd Matters Publishing

      Cover design by Deideigraphic

       ISBN: 978-0-9899164-9-3

      This book is dedicated to both of my grandmothers, Pauline Yvonne and Barbara Yvonne.  These two women came from very different places yet had quite a bit in common, including their middle name!  I only hope that as I carry their name forward, my life will continue the legacy they left for our family.   

      "IF YOU WANT TO GO FAST, GO ALONE.

      IF YOU WANT TO GO FAR, GO TOGETHER"

      -African Proverb

      CONTENTS

      INTRODUCTION 

      C0 THE CINDERELLA STORY 

      C1 CHEMISTRY

      C2 COMPATIBILITY

      C3 CIRCUMSTANCE

      C4 CHOICE

      C∞ CLARITY

      ABOUT THE AUTHOR

      ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

      CONTINUE THE DISCUSSION

      INTRODUCTION:

      ringandheartsmall

      WHAT ARE THE 4CS OF RELATIONSHIPS?

      How do you date? Who do you date? When do you know if you do or don’t want to go on another date with someone? How do you know if someone is THE ONE? What does all of this mean? Dating has gotten progressively complicated as our world has transitioned from a society where you were defined by your family into one where you are defined by your profession. From a society where men and women had clear, understood, society-endorsed roles in the world, to one where equality is much more prevalent. Now, I’m not suggesting that we go back to the ‘good ole days’ for one second! What I am suggesting is that we need a new way to date. A new way to assess whether or not we like a person enough to move forward. As much as we move around for the sake of our careers, getting the background check that your family (mom, aunt, grandma) used to do for you is now a matter of ‘Googling’ your potential date. No longer can we easily assess a guy’s background, values, and intentions. We’ve gone from a world where courting was the norm to one where ‘Friends with Benefits’ is a common relationship status! How do we navigate these changes?

      Unfortunately, we cannot rely on the wisdom of elders anymore because the rules and rituals are so different in today’s dating game. Any advice they offer would lack relevance. Between time and money, the average woman in 2015, has experienced greater financial independence and reached higher career status all while having an overwhelming amount of demands on her time. Our grandmothers lived simpler lives. Given such demanding careers, many women are wondering if they even have time for the commitment of dating. However, with the age of first-time moms higher than it’s ever been as stated in 2014 by the CDC/NCHS National Vital Statistics System, some of us feel desperate to get down the aisle expeditiously (darn that biological clock!). For these reasons, the 4Cs of Relationships aims to lay out a clear, concise decision-making framework to help you navigate this labyrinth of the new age dating world. The purpose of the content is not to tell you how to date or who to date. It’s simply to give you the tools to start a personal dialogue as well as discuss with friends and most importantly, between you and your dates. Now let’s get to it!

      When you think of 4Cs, diamonds are probably what come to mind first. Cut, Clarity, Color and Carat are the 4 ‘C’ words used by diamond specialists to determine a diamond’s value. Diamonds are also associated with relationships as the stone of choice hopeful men present to their girlfriends when asking for their hand in marriage. As important as diamonds are to the fanfare and pomp that is associated with engagements and weddings, the 4Cs of relationships are even more important when assessing the sustainability of a relationship. Chemistry, Compatibility, Circumstance, and Choice comprise the 4Cs of Relationships.

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