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Awesome Sh*t My Drill Sergeant Said: Wit and Wisdom from America's Finest
Awesome Sh*t My Drill Sergeant Said: Wit and Wisdom from America's Finest
Awesome Sh*t My Drill Sergeant Said: Wit and Wisdom from America's Finest
Ebook173 pages51 minutes

Awesome Sh*t My Drill Sergeant Said: Wit and Wisdom from America's Finest

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About this ebook

The official tie-in book to the wildly popular Facebook page, featuring brand-new crazy, off-the-wall, outrageously funny, and downright “awesome” pearls of wisdom from real-life drill sergeants and instructors from all branches of the military.

Sweat dries. Blood clots. Bones heal. Suck it up, buttercup.

After his deployment in Afghanistan, Dan Caddy began swapping great drill sergeant stories by e-mail with other combat veterans—an exchange with friends that would grow into the dedicated Facebook page, “Awesome Sh*t My Drill Sergeant Said.” But what began as a comedic outlet has evolved into a robust online community and support network that conducts fundraisers for and donates to military charities, has helped veterans struggling with PTSD and other issues, and on numerous occasions, literally saved lives.

Now, Caddy shares more great DS stories—most never before seen—in this humorous collection. Often profane, sometimes profound, yet always entertaining, these rants from real life soldiers are interspersed with lively sidebars, Top 10 lists, stories from fans, one-liners, and more.

For anyone who has suffered a hard-ass manager (in uniform or not), Awesome Sh*t My Drill Sergeant Said will add a much needed dose of humor to the day.

LanguageEnglish
PublisherHarperCollins
Release dateJun 9, 2015
ISBN9780062351975
Awesome Sh*t My Drill Sergeant Said: Wit and Wisdom from America's Finest
Author

Dan Caddy

Dan Caddy is a former marketing professional and veteran of Operation Enduring Freedom. He is the founder of the Awesome Sh*t My Drill Sergeant Said Facebook page. The Facebook page now has more than ten individuals on staff, including many current and former drill sergeants. Dan is the president and founder of Battle in Distress Inc., a nonprofit devoted to helping service members in crisis. He lives in Vermont and continues to serve in the military.

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  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Warning: Do NOT try to read this just before going to sleep! Literal laugh out loud. So much that my cat gave me looks and then tried to nip me to get me to stop. Anyone who has been enlisted in the military can relate, although while colorful, the Navy Company Commanders weren't as colorful as the Drill Sargeant in this collection of priceless gems...

Book preview

Awesome Sh*t My Drill Sergeant Said - Dan Caddy

DEDICATION

THIS BOOK IS DEDICATED FIRST AND FOREMOST TO ALL CURRENT AND FORMER DRILL SERGEANTS: YOU HAVE SHAPED THE GENERATIONS OF SOLDIERS WHO HAVE SERVED WITH DISTINCTION IN BOTH PEACE AND WAR.

TO MY WIFE, LINDSEY, WHOSE SUPPORT AND UNDERSTANDING DURING THE CRAZY TIMES IS THE ONLY REASON ASMDSS IS STILL GOING AND THIS BOOK EXISTS.

LAST BUT NOT LEAST, TO THE ADMINS AND STAFF WHOSE ASSISTANCE, INSPIRATION, FRIENDSHIP, AND CAMARADERIE MADE THIS BOOK POSSIBLE FROM THE BEGINNING.

CONTENTS

DEDICATION

INTRODUCTION

THE CREEDS

PART ONE: SHARK ATTACK

PART TWO: SINK OR SWIM

PART THREE: LIFE AFTER BASIC

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

RESOURCES

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

CREDITS

COPYRIGHT

ABOUT THE PUBLISHER

INTRODUCTION

Meet your drill sergeant, Private.

Even someone with zero knowledge of the military will see the fatigues and the round brown campaign hat and instantly know who they are looking at—a sight usually followed by a stab of uneasiness. Brought into the cultural mainstream by R. Lee Ermey in his masterful portrayal of a Marine Corps drill instructor in the film Full Metal Jacket, the drill sergeant is an immediately recognizable and iconic figure. Everyone has an idea in their head of what a drill sergeant is . . . and does. Often that image is focused on fear, aggression, pain, and discipline. And while it’s true that a drill sergeant’s larger-than-life persona and motivational style may incorporate some, or all, of those panic-inducing, gut-checking, strength-building forces, you might not know one other important thing . . . drill sergeants are some of the FUNNIEST people on the planet!

Those of you who have served in the military will have your own vivid memories of your drill sergeants (and know exactly what I’m talking about). And if you’re anything like me, and the thousands of veterans I’ve talked with over the years, you can probably also speak to the impact that a drill sergeant has on your life after Basic Training has ended. This book, and the Awesome Sh*t My Drill Sergeant Said Facebook page that spawned it, collect the very best quotes, stories, lists, words of wisdom—and maybe a few insults—from America’s finest drill sergeants. While they may not be there to uplift your spirits or compliment your wardrobe, drill sergeants have honed their ability to transform young men and women into professional disciplined warriors—and maybe have a good laugh (at you) while they do it.

THE DRILL SERGEANT CREED

I am a drill sergeant

I will assist each individual in their efforts to become a highly motivated, well disciplined, physically and mentally fit soldier, capable of defeating any enemy on today’s modern battlefield.

I will instill pride in all I train. Pride in self, in the Army, and in country.

I will insist that each soldier meets and maintains the Army standards of military bearing and courtesy, consistent with the highest traditions of the U.S. Army.

I will lead by example, never requiring a soldier to attempt any task I would not do myself.

But first, last, and always, I am an American soldier. Sworn to defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, both foreign and domestic.

I am a drill sergeant.

THE SOLDIER’S CREED

I am an American soldier.

I am a warrior and a member of a team.

I serve the people of the United States, and live the Army values.

I will always place the mission first.

I will never accept defeat.

I will never quit.

I will never leave a fallen comrade.

I am disciplined, physically and mentally tough, trained and proficient in my warrior tasks and drills.

I always maintain my arms, my equipment, and myself.

I am an expert and I am a professional.

I stand ready to deploy, engage, and destroy the enemies

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