Good Intentions

Good Intentions-A novel by Patria L. Dunn (Patria Dunn-Rowe)

Copyright © 2012 Patria L. Dunn (Patria Dunn-Rowe)

Smashwords Edition

All rights reserved

The road to hell is paved with good intentions… –Samuel Johnson

This book is dedicated to my mother and Pastor, Patricia Haywood Dunn.

Thank you for sheltering and protecting me as only a mother can.

You are my rock, my comfort, and my heart.

I will love you always.

Patria L. Dunn

Prologue:

Goshen Memorial Hospital was the last place that Delia Landry wanted to be today. She’d spent the last three months of her life juggling her time between her obligations at the church, her son, and her dying husband. The call from the hospital early this morning had confirmed her worst fears, and despite all the prayers sent up by her and hundreds of others, the fact of the matter was that Jacob’s time was nearly up.

Delia swiped away the threatening tears before they could fall, the bouquet of fresh flowers she’d stopped to buy on her way, clutched so tightly to her chest, they were beginning to wilt. The hallway seemed to blur as she made her way down the east corridor and over towards the central nurses’ station. Like every other day, she knew that they would greet her with a sympathetic smile and maybe a pat on the back before saying something kind about Jacob.

If only she hadn’t pushed; if only she hadn’t been so adamant on raising her own flesh and blood. He’d held off treatment for her, and now he was the only one suffering the consequences. Justus was only ten years old. How would she ever tell her son that her selfishness had possibly killed his father?

Delia stifled a sob as she stopped just outside the door labeled with her husband’s name. The doctor had said to come as soon as possible, but she’d sat in her car for more than twenty minutes before finally starting it and heading towards the city. There had never been a time when a prayer wasn’t on her lips, but today her faith failed her. Today, she’d come to say goodbye to her husband of twenty-five years and she just couldn’t do it.

Lord… Delia tried, but couldn’t get past the lump in the back of her throat. Please… she whispered as her shoulders shook from her inner torment, her face pressed against the wall to keep her from sinking to the worn carpeting.

She couldn’t blame God for taking her husband away from her. Cancer had done this. That is what she was angry at. No…not just angry, but furious. They’d spilled blood, sweat and tears to build what they had now. It hadn’t been easy, but they were good people. Their faith had carried them through some of the toughest times, and yet, here she was, struggling to find some sort of peace with the hand she’d been dealt.

Twenty years ago she’d prayed for a child. After ten years of trying, Jacob had put aside his pride and finally agreed to see a specialist. The problem had been with him, not her: Prostate Cancer in its most aggressive form. There had been no signs or symptoms, just a sheet of paper handed to them by the doctor who was now Jacob’s Oncologist. An immediate prostatectomy had been suggested, but it would have meant giving up the one thing they’d both wanted since they’d met. Jacob would have done anything to make her happy. They’d agreed together to postpone the operation in favor of having his sperm banked. A few months later, once that was done and Delia had been successfully inseminated, they’d agreed to postpone the operation further until Justus was born.

Their prayers had been general; a child of either gender would have done, but God had blessed them with a son. Jacob couldn’t see spending months or even years in recovery, missing out on the most important parts of his life. Delia hadn’t argued. Even when she wasn’t included in their little outings, she was still in awe of how blessed they were. A year, turned into two years, and then five years. Somewhere in there Delia finally accepted her calling to become a Pastor and they’d moved just outside the city, to Lexington, for her to take the position at Mt. Zion. When Justus started to play little league football, Jacob was already in denial. He felt fine, and was even coaching his son’s team after long days at work. At six years old Justus was everything they’d hoped he would be and even more.

It was right after Justus had turned eight that everything changed. Jacob had woken up complaining of his bones aching. By the end of the day, he was in so much pain, Delia had to pick him up from work and drive him straight to the hospital. Stage three cancer, and it was everywhere. Chemo was started immediately and the surgery done just two days after that. Six full months of constant prayer at his bedside, and he’d finally come home to his wife and child. The cancer wasn’t in remission, but Jacob was well enough to attend some of Justus’s football practices, and even go to work a couple days out of the week. For eight months he’d gained the weight back that he’d lost, and was almost starting to seem like himself.

Two days after Justus turned ten, Jacob had fallen and hit his head in the shower. The cancer was in his brain now, and there was nothing the doctors could do but make him comfortable. He’d been ‘comfortable’ for over three months now, his once healthy, muscular body ravished to skin and bones and still shrinking. Delia had expected the call she’d gotten this morning, months ago, but had thanked God every day when it didn’t come. It seemed surreal that she was standing here now, asking God why it couldn’t have been any different.

Becoming the Pastor at Mt. Zion had humbled her in ways she’d never thought possible. Even through the heaviness in her heart she knew that she couldn’t give up. She was fighting a much bigger fight than the disease that had claimed her husband’s body. She reminded herself of the twenty-five beautiful years they’d spent together, and the ten amazing years they’d spent raising their son. This wasn’t a goodbye…more like a see you later, and with renewed strength she pushed open the door and gazed at her husband one last time.

Let your will be done Lord…

Chapter 1:

Seven years later…

Jus-tus! Jus-tus! Jus-tus! Jus-tus!!!!!!!!

The crowd went wild as jersey number sixteen streaked along the edge of the field towards the Titans end zone. It had been raining all day, and the late November chill only added to the miserable weather, but that didn’t stop the Lexington high school football stadium from filling to its max. Even the opposing side was cluttered with home team fans, all of them waiting to see if the impossible had just been made possible. Justus Landry had made Lexington’s varsity football team as a freshman and had been breaking records ever since. Three state championships behind them, and the Titans were counting on their starting quarterback to take them all the way through their fourth undefeated season. With Justus Landry on their side, no team had been able to stop them, and with the score tied twenty to twenty against the Mavericks, this is just what the Titans needed to end their season.

That’s my boy! Delia Landry screamed as she bolted from the wet, steel, bleacher seat, her hands thrown in the air as she shook the baby blue and black pom poms at the field.

She didn’t care that most of the other moms were almost ten years younger than her, and she also didn’t care that most of them were looking at her with envy now. She’d kept her promise to Jacob and had seen to it that Justus went to the best football camps Lexington had to offer. She’d never missed a game, even when she’d had to find a fill in to take the pulpit on the Sunday mornings they’d traveled to states four years in a row.

Her breath held as a linebacker twice Justus’s size bore down on him ten yards before he cleared the mass of other players on the field. Delia’s eyes closed for a moment, envisioning just what her son would do. She knew that he’d suspect a man from the far outside; the Mavericks were predictable enough to pull the same play every time. One quick peek and her heart leapt as her son bent low and side stepped back towards the middle of the field. They were running almost perpendicular to each other now, but what Justus didn’t have in build he made up for in speed. The linebacker’s hands barely grazed the baby blue jersey as Justus dove past him and landed square in the middle of the steel blue hammer painted on the end zone.

TOUCHDOWN!!!!!! The loud speaker blared, and Delia jumped up and down as her son pretended to shout his way all the way across the end zone into the arms of his team mates.

With only two seconds remaining, there would be no overtime to this game. The Titans had won and they had their star quarterback, Justus Landry, to thank for it. The band struck up the school’s anthem, and the cheerleaders danced across the field to greet the players. The crowd was in an uproar, bull horns blaring and everyone cheering as the Titans mascot flexed from the sidelines.

Delia couldn’t help but smile as she watched the parade meant mostly for her son. She didn’t dare turn around and look at the scouts she knew were sitting up in the announcer’s box. They’d spent the last few months turning them all away after accepting the full scholarship Texas State had offered. There was no changing her mind. One more semester and Justus had a full ride to the school his father had attended and his father before him. Football was in their blood, and Delia was proud that she’d been able to keep her promise.

Pastor Landry! a deep baritone voice shouted just as Delia started to make her way from the stands to the field.

She was surprised anyone had recognized her dressed in the clear poncho, the hood pulled so low over her head that her vision was almost obscured. She looked around as she descended the stairs, her mouth twisting into a smile as she found Deacon Morrison’s face, all six feet of him towering above the throng. He waved as he pushed his way towards her, taking her hand and sheltering both of their heads with the oversized umbrella he held.

I got here a little late, and couldn’t find you in the crowd….

David…you didn’t have to do that… It’s pouring down raining out here, and…well…I mean…they were lucky the game wasn’t canceled! Delia sputtered, her cheeks flushing hot at the deacon’s presence.

There was nothing to be embarrassed about, and she was a grown woman, but it had just recently dawned on her that Deacon Morrison’s attention to Justus over the last three years had mainly been a chance for him to get closer to her. When Jacob died, Deacon Morrison and his wife Olivia had been her sole supporters. They’d been there when she didn’t want to get out of bed, and they’d helped her through her grief. Once she’d gotten herself together, they’d continued to support her at church, but she’d insisted on doing for Justus all on her own. Four years ago when Olivia had passed away, after a long bout with pneumonia, Delia had shown Deacon Morrison the same support: cooking him meals, washing his clothes and cleaning his house until he was back on his feet. They’d become close friends, but Delia had never considered him in any other way but that. That is, until he’d tried to kiss her after Wednesday night bible study last week.

She’d stayed late to study for Saturday’s women’s conference, and he’d stayed late to lock up and set the security system. A few minutes of chatting in the back hallway had turned into an hour long conversation about her losing Jacob and him losing Olivia. She’d been just about to tell him good night when he’d pulled her to him and planted a soft kiss right on her lips. She’d been mortified. Not only was she the Pastor, but they were also in the church. If anyone had seen…!

Deacon Morrison had missed church this past Sunday for the first time in years and had also missed Wednesday night bible study. Seeing him here tonight, at Justus’s game, was the last thing she wanted when they hadn’t even addressed the kiss. She’d fled to her office and locked the door, and then watched him on the security cameras as he left the church and headed to his car, his head hung low. She hadn’t known what to say to him then, and she still wasn’t sure what to say now.

I wanted to be here, he answered with a shrug, his eyes on the crowd of people in front of them.

She barely felt the press of his hand on her back through the thick plastic poncho and layers of winter clothes she had on underneath, but still her breath caught sharply before letting loose in a heavy sigh.

Look David… We haven’t had a chance to talk about…

I know and forgive me… I should have tried to explain last week. I should have just put it out there. It’s been years Delia…

Pastor… Delia corrected softly, her head ridged as she refused to acknowledge the shock that was certainly on his face.

Even after all this time… Deacon Morrison started, stopping along the edge of the chain linked fence where the players were congregated. "Okay fine… Pastor Landry… There is nothing wrong with the two of us being together. Jacob was a fine man of God, and Olivia, an exceptional women. We wouldn’t be tarnishing their memory by living the rest of our lives together…"

The rest of our lives?! You tried to kiss me, and now you’re talking marriage Deacon Morrison?! Delia gasped, her hand to her chest as she looked around the crowd of faces to make sure no one was listening. Surely you of all people should know how hard it has been for me to Pastor in this community. Just the simple fact that I am a woman, and a widowed woman on top of that, has cost Mt. Zion so many members. Could you imagine if you and I….

Then pray about it Del…Pastor… Deacon Morrison corrected, his hand slipping to her shoulder. I never thought I’d be able to love another woman, but these last few months, I watch you up there in that pulpit and it’s like…

MOM!!!! Did you see it?! Did you see it?!?! Justus grabbed hold of the top of the fence and leapt to the other side to grab his mother up in a bear hug.

He knew she wouldn’t care that he was soaking wet and sweaty. Her arms wrapped around him just as tightly and they jumped up and down together, Delia pressing steady kisses on her son’s cheek.

You’ve got lightening in your legs boy! What’d I tell you!?

Texas State here I come! We go to states next month, and you better believe the Bears have nothing on the Titans! Justus flexed, the muscles in his arms rippling as he raised them above his head.

Delia laughed, turning her