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    And When She Was Good: A Novel
    And When She Was Good: A Novel
    And When She Was Good: A Novel
    Ebook391 pages6 hours

    And When She Was Good: A Novel

    By Laura Lippman

    3.5/5

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    Perennial New York Times and nationally bestselling author and acclaimed multiple–prize winner Laura Lippman delivers a brilliant novel about a woman with a secret life who is forced to make desperate choices to save her son and herself.

    When Hector Lewis told his daughter that she had a nothing face, it was just another bit of tossed-off cruelty from a man who specialized in harsh words and harsher deeds. But twenty years later, Heloise considers it a blessing to be a person who knows how to avoid attention. In the comfortable suburb where she lives, she's just a mom, the youngish widow with a forgettable job who somehow never misses a soccer game or a school play. In the state capitol, she's the redheaded lobbyist with a good cause and a mediocre track record.

    But in discreet hotel rooms throughout the area, she's the woman of your dreams—if you can afford her hourly fee.

    For more than a decade, Heloise has believed she is safe. She has created a rigidly compartmentalized life, maintaining no real friendships, trusting few confidantes. Only now her secret life, a life she was forced to build after the legitimate world turned its back on her, is under siege. Her once oblivious accountant is asking loaded questions. Her longtime protector is hinting at new, mysterious dangers. Her employees can't be trusted. One county over, another so-called suburban madam has been found dead in her car, a suicide. Or is it?

    Nothing is as it seems as Heloise faces a midlife crisis with much higher stakes than most will ever know.

    And then she learns that her son's father might be released from prison, which is problematic because he doesn't know he has a son. The killer and former pimp also doesn't realize that he's serving a life sentence because Heloise betrayed him. But he's clearly beginning to suspect that Heloise has been holding something back all these years.

    With no formal education, no real family, and no friends, Heloise has to remake her life—again. Disappearing will be the easy part. She's done it before and she can do it again. A new name and a new place aren't hard to come by if you know the right people. The trick will be living long enough to start a new life.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherHarperCollins
    Release dateAug 14, 2012
    ISBN9780062201614
    And When She Was Good: A Novel
    Author

    Laura Lippman

    Since Laura Lippman’s debut, she has been recognized as a distinctive voice in mystery fiction and named one of the “essential” crime writers of the last 100 years. Stephen King called her “special, even extraordinary,” and Gillian Flynn wrote, “She is simply a brilliant novelist.” Her books have won most of the major awards in her field and been translated into more than twenty-five languages. She lives in Baltimore and New Orleans with her teenager.

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    Reviews for And When She Was Good

    3.5/5

    355 ratings54 reviews

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    • 5/5
      I've read this book four times. Each time, I never get bored with it. The adventures and plights of Helen kept my eyes glued to the book. Laura fleshed out her character very well. When she was good, she was very, very good. When she was bad, she was terrible.
    • 4/5
      A high end prostitute with a dark past tries to juggle multiple problems to provide a good life for her son.
    • 4/5
      Heloise, suburbun madam
    • 4/5
      In Laura Lippman's And When She Was Good Heloise Lewis, aka Helen, is, from all appearances, a single mother and successful lobbyist for the Women's Full Employment Network living in Turner's Grove, Maryland. Only a select number of people know that in reality she is a suburban madam. Heloise keeps her personal life and privacy carefully guarded while she tries to run her successful business and raise her son.

      Heloise grew up as Helen Lewis, the daughter of an abusive father and submissive mother. When her father told her that her looks were forgettable (and later beat her), she took it to heart and now, as an adult, she tries to blend in, and avoid arousing anyone's suspicions. While she blames her father for the path her life took and her lack of education, they are the result of Heloise's own poor choices. But Heloise is intelligent and resourceful, as she manages to build up a successful business behind a legitimate business facade.

      The chapters alternate between the current day Heloise and Helen from earlier times. As Heloise struggles with her current problems, we slowly learn what took place in her life as Helen and how her actions and decisions back then are encroaching on her life today. Heloise wants to live a quiet life with her son, Scott, but circumstances are looking more and more like someone wants her dead - and it could be Scott's father, a man who knows nothing about his son. Most people think Heloise is a widow, but Scott's father is alive and well - and in prison.

      The suspense slowly builds as more and more of Heloise's past is revealed and the reader begins to suspect the problems that may arise in her present situation. While it's no real surprise who the bad guys are in this novel, it is a pleasure reading to find out what is going to happen next. In deference to Lippman's considerable talent and writing ability, I'll admit I read And When She Was Good quite quickly because I was simply unable to put it down.

      I did struggle with an inability to be completely accepting of Helen's feelings that she was trapped in her life's choices. I just kept saying in my mind that her problems were a result of her poor choices. Yes her father was an abusive jerk, but he didn't force her down the path she chose. And, while I agree that in the sex and porn industry that the women are someone's daughter, neighbor, mother, sister, it should be noted that the men who objectify and take advantage of the woman are a large part of the problem. It is a hot topic that merits debate way beyond the scope of a novel.
      Highly Recommended

      Disclosure: I received an advanced reading copy of this book from the publisher and TLC for review purposes.
    • 3/5
      I thought the writing was quite good, but the story was not very interesting. How someone so intelligent could at the same time be so stupid was irritating. I didn't care for Helen/Heloise at all.
    • 5/5
      I won this from the Goodreads First Reads Giveaway.This was a fantastically written, very compelling book. It was not the murder mystery that I thought it was, and if I hadn't been mistaken I might have skipped it and truly missed out on an excellent read. I will definitely be checking out some of Laura's other books because I really did like her writing.
    • 3/5
      And When She Was Good by Laura Lippman is the third stand-alone book I have read of Lippman’s many books, this however, was my least favorite. The writing is solid as I have come to expect from Lippman, unfortunately I did not care for Heloise/Helen. It is rather rare for me to thoroughly enjoy a book when I dislike the main character, and that was the case with And When She Was Good, I just could not get past my disdain for Heloise/Helen. Would I recommend the book to others? Of course, I cannot dismiss the book simply because I felt nothing for the main character, however I would suggest readers look at other reviews as this may be just the mystery you are looking for.
    • 4/5
      Crime fiction is not a genre I frequently read, but I am a fan of the TV shows Weeds and Breaking Bad, so Laura Lippman's novel And When She Was Good, about a suburban single mom who runs a prostitution business, intrigued me. (I also live a block away from the place where a woman in NYC was accused of running a high-priced call girl ring.)We meet teenage Helen, verbally abused by her unemployed father, a man separated from his wife and children, and living with Helen and her mother. He becomes more and more erratic and Helen becomes involved with the son of the owner of the restaurant where she works to make money for college.The boyfriend is a troubled guy, a drug user, and convinces Helen to run away with him. Helen ends up working at a strip club and eventually as a prostitute. She trades in the bad boyfriend for Val, who is even worse, a serious pimp with a bad temper and a gun. When Val kills a man and Helen becomes pregnant, she plots her escape.Flash forward and Helen is now Heloise, living in the suburbs and raising her twelve-year-old son. She is also running an internet prostitution ring, along with the help of her au pair/assistant Audrey. The only other person she can count on is Tom, a cop who knows what she does and protects her because she once helped him.Heloise keeps a low profile:"She always stands apart on the soccer field, her conversations with the other mothers polite yet fleeting. She's not sure whose fault that is. She stopped trying to figure out if she's standoffish because other mothers snub her or if she's snubbed because the other mothers sense she's standoffish. For the most part, she tells herself that's she's happy for their neglect... True, she encourages incuriosity in most people. Yet it's still hurtful to see how easily people fall into line with one's desire to be ignored."When another suburban madam's murder is made to look like suicide, and Heloise discovers that the man she put behind bars may be getting out of prison and one of her former employees tries to blackmail her, things begin to fall apart.And When She Was Good is a page-turner of a novel, with twists and turns, and you will read it in one sitting. Helen is a tough, smart, resourceful lady, but like Walter White from Breaking Bad and Nancy Botwin from Weeds, Helen sees a secret life of crime as her only solution to the problem of making enough money to support her family, but also like them, she discovers that her decision is bound to catch up with her.The writing is crisp, the characters (even the minor ones) interesting, and the tension ratchets up with each turn of the page. I chewed off more than a few fingernails by the end. (I know, a bad habit) Lippman writes a crackling good novel, and I will be looking for more of her books when I'm in the mood for crime fiction.
    • 5/5
      She pours another glass of wine, finishing a bottle for the first time in years, yet feeling as if she’s not drinking alone, far from it. She’s one of a dozen, a hundred, a thousand, a million women, holding a glass and staring into space, asking herself the musical questions she used to hear on soupy, soapy WFEN radio: What’s it all about? Is that all there is? What are you doing with the rest of your life? - from And When She Was Good, page 125 -Heloise is living in the suburbs of Baltimore, Maryland with her eleven year old son, looking like most of the other women who drive their kids to school, drink coffee at the local cafe, and shop for the latest fashion trends. But, Heloise is hiding a secret. Her son’s father, Val, has not died the tragic death which Heloise has told her neighbors about…instead he sits in prison for murder because of Heloise’s cooperation with police. Val not only does not know the part Heloise has played in his conviction, but he also has no idea he has a son – a secret Heloise is committed to keeping. And Heloise is not supporting her lifestyle from some insurance payout, instead she runs a high end prostitution business where the customers are some of the most powerful men in politics and one misstep could upend her carefully constructed life.Heloise has learned to lie and hide, to compartmentalize her life so that she can give her son everything she never had…and it all seems to be working out until Heloise discovers that Val’s life imprisonment might be overturned, and a certain suburban Madam from the next town over is arrested and then found dead in her garage. Are the two incidents connected? And if so, what does that mean for Heloise?Laura Lippman will not disappoint her fans with this newest novel about the dark, despairing world of prostitution and the incomparable love of a mother for her son. Heloise is a surprisingly compassionate protagonist, a woman who survives the abusive hand of her stepfather only to find herself caught up in a life of meaningless sex for money. She is willing to do what it takes to survive, and is determined to make a life for her child even if it means risking everything. Heloise has learned to flatten her affect, disengage from others, be the keeper of her own life…and yet, she has dreams and desires that require her to trust. This dichotomy is what provides the tension in the novel.Lippman’s exploration of a woman’s value in society, which is often measured in her ability to balance the demands of marriage, motherhood and profession, elevates the book beyond a simple psychological thriller. Heloise represents many women – those who have suffered and survived domestic violence, those who have sacrificed for their children, those who have struggled to find their professional path, those who have fought for something better and have fallen and gotten back up again. Lippman’s talent as an author shines in this aspect of the novel – illuminating the challenges of women in a society which often demeans them.No one values her. That was a painful lesson to learn at her father’s knee – at the end of her father’s arm, at the flat of his palm – but once she absorbed it, she flourished. It doesn’t matter what others think she is worth. She sets the price. – from And When She Was Good, page 81 -I have loved previous novels by Lippman, but I think And When She Was Good is her best effort to date. Complex characters, themes relevant to today’s women, and a plot that is keenly observed and brilliantly executed. I read this novel in record time, not wanting to set it down for too long before picking it back up.Readers who love literary thrillers and want deeply developed characters along with a fast-paced plot, will not want to miss this one.Highly Recommended.
    • 3/5
      Heloise Lewis is the proprietor of an escort service whose clients tend to be Washington politicians. She is also a single mother to Scott, a preteen. She has been able to keep her private and professional lives separate so she can build a safe world for her son, but that world starts crumbling. Prostitutes who worked for Val, Heloise’s former pimp, die and Heloise suspects they have been murdered and wonders if she might be next. Will she be able to reinvent herself and begin a new life?In many ways the book is not really a thriller; the pacing initially is rather slow for a suspense novel. The book is more of a character study, albeit a flawed one. Through flashbacks we learn about how Heloise found herself following this particular lifestyle, and she becomes someone for whom we have compassion. She is indeed not perfect; she herself says, “It was a toss-up who had caused more damage in the world, she or Val.” She is, however, a survivor whose priority is her son. She is an intelligent and astute woman, although there are a couple of instances where she inexplicably fails to recognize people’s true motives. The other problem is that she continues to visit Val, who is in prison for murder, even though she fears him and hides from him the fact that she bore his child. Why she doesn’t cut all ties is not convincingly explained.The characterization is good in that Heloise is developed into a dynamic character. For example, she is very judgmental of her mother, but eventually realizes, “She’s been a dupe, a sap. She is, in short, as unwitting as her own mother.” She recognizes another similarity: “It was never her intention to ruin anyone. She was only offering girls the same life she had fashioned for herself. Her mother, she realizes, could make the same realization.” In the end she forgives her mother, hoping that forgiveness has “transitive properties.”The book explores a woman’s value in society. Heloise believes, “No one values her.” She takes this “painful lesson” and uses it to her advantage, deciding, “It doesn’t matter what others think she is worth. She sets the price.” The book is a worthwhile read for its addressing misconceptions about prostitutes and the challenges women face in a society which often demeans them.
    • 3/5
      Lippman presents an interesting story about a "madam" and how she became a madam. The story does not go into vivid description of the murder scenes, or into Helen/Heloise's fall from grace. The story follows Helen's life in all the sadness and triumph. The story misses the depth of degradation and hopelessness that is shown in the books of Tess Gerritsen. Lippmann presents a Technicolor movie version minus the grit.
    • 3/5
      Over the last few years Lippman has been taking a break from her long-running series featuring Tess Monaghan and focusing on stand-alone novels. I think it's a great way to explore different personalities, predicaments and resolutions without having to force them into a pattern that might not do them justice; that is as part of one of Tess's investigations. I like the little cameos she slips in from that world though. This time it was Tiner who made an appearance.While this books is billed as a thriller, I don't know if it really is. Mild suspense maybe, but a thriller - no. Heloise isn't in enough danger to make the story thrilling or induce dread. Sure, her position isn't terrific, being in thrall to her old pimp and being blackmailed by an employee, but she doesn't connect up the other killings to her own scenario early enough and when she does, there hasn't been any tension to crest so the threat basically falls flat and resolves itself rather quickly.No, what this book is is the story of a woman's downfall. It's not a unique story, but the way it's told (interleaved flashbacks inserted into the present narrative) is well done and it's easy to see how Heloise's past constructed her current mindset. The way she approaches the shitty situations she gets herself into are reasonable and detached She's not the quickest off the mark, neither is she the most ruthless when finally pushed into action, but she is determined and methodical. I think she realizes full well what giving in to her emotions got her. Her extreme compartmentalization works for her and she does not let her two lives intersect. She says it's difficult sometimes and takes full-concentration, but she pulls it off. I couldn't wait to see how she dealt with each of the people threatening her life. Hector Lewis needed more of a comeuppance than he got, but as it is with the Hector Lewises of the world, he doesn't suffer much consequences. No, that's Heloise's fate.The book's title eludes me a bit, but the lock of red hair on the cover is especially poignant. The lengths this woman goes to to protect her son is pretty amazing. No hint of his true origins can be allowed. Constant vigilance must be maintained. I was exhausted just reading about Heloise and what she's had to do to salvage her screwed up life. While not thrilling, it was engrossing.
    • 5/5
      Impressive novel written with wit and talent unique to Lippman. She takes a simple storyline of a single mom working to support her son (normally a yawn and a pass for me) and creates a compelling portrait of a Madame running a high end call girl service , yet who shares the average woman's concerns. At the risk of sounding trite, it is an empowering novel; all these women from different cultures, education and economic levels, basically wanting the same thing in life: to protect and care for those we love.It is not an easy story, it challenges our societal perception of prostitution in gentle, non confrontational manner, keeping the story still enjoyable and not preachy.
    • 4/5
      And When She Was Good is labeled as a mystery by the library, however, while there are some unknowns, this it really isn't a classic who-done-it mystery. It is very interesting and well written, but we really know who the "bad" guy is through the whole book.
    • 4/5
      Yes, twists and turns are one of the things you will find in a good story. Of course, it's a fine balance. Too many twists and the story can be irritating and unreadable. Too few, and perhaps the story can be lackluster and boring. A fine balance needs to be struck don't you think? And then there are endings. Endings are important. I like happy endings most, but life doesn't always give us a happy ending. And if all stories had such endings, if thre were no suspense as to how the story would finally come to a close, why that would be no fun. And When She Was Good, has twists, it has turns and it too comes to a close eventually, which means it has an ending. Whether or not it is a happy one, I leave to you to find out. Heloise is the main character. To be honest with you, I didn't like her much. This worked against my enjoyment of the story for a while, because I do prefer to like the characters I'm spending so much time with. But Heloise was just not likable to me. Now you may well feel differently about her. That's one of the enjoyable things about reading, is differing opinions and lively discussion of whatever book is on topic at the moment. So, even though She is a single mom who is providing a good life for her son, I didn't like her. It had nothing to do with her livelihood, I assure you. In fact, I have had a fantasy or two about that being a perfect job. No, it wasn't what she did for a living, as much as it was just her personality and her dishonesty. Now, I realize that some discretion was necessary for her, but I thought she carried it a little far for my taste. I think that this story had a decent beginning, and I think it had a very interesting ending. I also think that it dragged just a bit in the second quarter of the book. I felt as if it was just a tad too drawn out. By then we knew who Heloise was and where she stood and why. By the third quarter of the book the pace picked up again and I felt a little more sympathetic towards her, but just a little. I do like books about strong women though. Heloise had her faults, but weakness was not one of them. She is very typical in her need to care for her son and proved for them in the best possible way. She did not ever have an easy time of it. From the time she was a very young girl, she had battles to fight. And fight she did, but she did not come through them unscathed. Who does?This is a good story. I should have known that this author would deliver. She has done so for me before. I would definitely recommend this one to friends and family. And I would recommend it to you, too !
    • 5/5
      From then on, she flees from situation to another dangerous situation to another.This is not a story of sex; it is one of survival, loneliness and living by your wits. Helen ached for a loving father and mother so she did the opposite of them. She became a great mother to her son. She could never tell her neighbors about herself and not even tell her son anything about his father. Her intelligence shone through by the way that she organized her business but she was always craving a real education. She always had to figure out how to change her life. And the unraveling of the mystery of why the death of the suburban madam is so important to the story grows more important as the story develops.I highly recommend this book to all Laura Lippman fans.Although I received this book from the Amazon Vine Program, that in no way influenced my review.
    • 4/5
      I always enjoy Laura Lippman's books - series or standalone. And When She Was Good is her latest standalone and I loved it. Through the character of Heloise, Lippman gives a voice to a woman who is in some living with the consequences of a single bad choice and in others ways rising above those consequences even while swimming in them like a shark.Heloise had a terrible relationship with her father and watched her mother do the same. In the end, her mother's devotion to her father far outstripped her devotion to her own daughter and this haunts the book and Heloise's life. As a teenager she becomes involved with the (very) wrong man. She runs away with him and begins stripping and then hooking to support his drug habit. Desperate for a way out she turns to Val, a pimp and all-around criminal, who rescues her from her first love. In return she is Val's very careful favorite - at the top of a hierarchy of girls who take in-call or walk the streets. At the time of our story Val is in prison and she is running a high-end out-call service - very discreet - and the precariousness of her carefully built life becomes apparent. Things are going wrong, people from her old life are popping up dead, and she's not sure she can keep herself and her son safe. She longs for something different - a legitimate business - yet doubts her ability to make that step.Ms. Lippman brings the reader into Heloise's world with great ease, treating her character as a real person rather than as the cardboard cutout stereotype that most people imagine apply to prostitution. This is less a crime book and more a character portrait and I loved every single word. Heloise is a woman I could relate to and her plight isn't that different than the plight of many women who live in circumstances that lead them to poor choices - the wrong man ---> drugs or alcohol ---> abuse of one kind or another ---> illness ---> underemployment, and on and on. It's good for us all to remember that no matter the situation the person in it is a human being who once had all the shining potential that children have before the real world either elevates or stomps all over them. Just one misstep - that all it takes. Highly recommended.More about books at: chaotic compendiums
    • 5/5
      Heloise, born Helen, is a single mother and a business woman. Formerly a prostitute she now owns her own "consulting" business that caters to high profile men such as lawyers and polititians from Baltimore, Washington DC and Annapolis. She has tried to keep this part of her life secret as she lives in suburbia and is the typical mother. She pretty much keeps to herself and lives her life solely for her son. The death of a woman who was a madame with her own business is found dead, a suspected suicide, changes her life in a dangerous way. She not only has to deal with an ex employee who threatens to sue her because she claims she contracted HIV while in Heloise's employ, Heloise has a friend and protector in the police department who would warn her of any attempts to investigate her and her business, has decided to retire. The man who was her "pimp" is in prison for murder and Heloise comes to realize that this man can and will do whatever it takes to protect his interests. In describing what kind of woman Heloise is, the author tells a backstory of her life growing up in a dysfunctional family and her relationship with the man who is the father of her child.Ms.Lippman has the unique talent in setting up the story for the reader along with any backstory needed and then gives an ending that is totally unexpected. The latest psychological thriller from a gifted storyteller. A novel not to be missed. I highly recommend it and give it 5 stars.
    • 4/5
      SummaryHelen/Heloise escaped an abusive household right into the arms of her first "pimp" Billy...who then passed her along to Val. With no education, no money, no skills, and no self-confidence whatsoever at all, Heloise falls into a life from which there is no escape. Over time Heloise does learn survival skills, sometimes doing things that she wishes she didn't have to in order to stay alive and keep hoping for a better day. An unexpected pregnancy is the impetus for her escape attempt and puts the wheels in motion for a life of running from the truth. Heloise creates her own prostitution business and stays barely a step or two ahead of being discovered for what she has been and really is...all the while learning more about life and what it takes to make it in a world where no one receives a break for free. The takers are the only ones who win. What I LikedVal - as evil as he was...and he was evil (and mean), I thought this character was incredibly well developed. He's a thug, no doubt, but the reader can't help to respect him and even fear him a little. Heloise's self made education through books and courses online that she found relevant to her life and her sense of self. Isn't this what education should be all about?Audrey - Heloise and Audrey's relationship was complicated. As Heloise's right hand woman, the reader's first instinct is for them to be close...but both are damaged, and damaged just enough that neither completely lets down her guard...ever. Yet, the relationship works. There's a lot to be said about true unconditional friendship between women. I think women in today's society have grown too accustomed to tearing each other down rather than helping hold each other up. No whining here at all...just two strong women, accepting life for what it is and moving forward any way they can.Scott - Scott is what I believe holds Heloise together and keeps her from becoming a statistic or another unidentified druggie hooker body in the city morgue. The pace - I couldn't put this down. You've gotta love a book like that every now and then. Your heart races; your eyes are blurry from no sleep, but you can't stop. This will definitely not be my last Laura Lippman read.The language - this is a fast paced, heart racing thriller with literary quality. I'm no literary snob, I promise...I read all kinds of "stuff." But, good writing is good writing, and Lippman is the real deal. Obviously the issue here is prostitution. I have never bought the excuse that some women enjoy prostitution and do it because they want to. And, I'm appalled at the lack of support, financial, psychological, sociological, etc. for women who work in both the prostitution and porn industries. The good ole boy network is alive and well within these "careers" and women are used and abused...no matter how you look at it. Lippman deals with prostitution in the only real way it can be dealt with...there are no answers. It is complicated, the consequences are varied, many times ugly, have far reaching effects, and is sometimes deadly. Yet, some women "choose" to earn money this way. Why they "choose" prostitution is sometimes even more convaluted than the industry itself. I'm a firm believer in no easy answers...and I thoroughly enjoy a writer who doesn't try to create a fairy tale ending for a fairy tale world that frankly doesn't exist...for anyone.What I Didn't LikeHector and Beth - Hector is a no-brainer, an abusive husband/father, jerk, two-timer, arsehole...nothing to like there. But Beth? She was supposed to be Heloise's mother. Just because she chose to live the life she did shouldn't mean allowing Heloise to suffer as well. I didn't expect Heloise to forgive her, but it was obviously difficult for her to walk away from Beth forever. Lippman handled this relationship perfectly in the end.Terry - this relationship didn't fit for me at all...and it seemed unlikely that given Heloise's past, she would fall for someone like Terry. I didn't like him at all...too needy and too beggy and too sweet. Too good to be true.While Heloise is tough as nails, there were a couple of times where she almost panics and tells more than she should...to the wrong person. She has a conversation with Bettina, another prostitute from the old days, for example, where I literally was yelling, "NO, don't do this...don't tell her all that!" Of course, she didn't listen to me. So then, I was shaking my head in disbelief and then also wanted to say "I told you so" when that particular information was used against her. At first I found it unbelievable that Heloise would break like that, but she's holding a loaded deck and the handful of cards she's focusing on is getting harder and harder to keep straight. It makes perfect sense that she would panic since she is at heart a very good person. I just didn't like it. I honestly wanted her to beat the crap out of the people who did her wrong. So there.Overall RecommendationWhile this is my first Lippman, I know that it is a stand alone rather than a continuation of her series about Tess Monaghan. Whether or not you've read any of Lippman's series, I think you'll find And When She Was Good to be an exciting ride with the added bonus of quality writing and complicated women's issues embedded. (As if there are any other kind of women's issues :/)
    • 5/5
      First Line: The headline catches Heloise's eye as she waits in the always-long line at the Starbucks closest to her son's middle school.Heloise Lewis has spent most of her life avoiding attention. She lives in a comfortable suburb where very little is known about her. Ask anyone in the neighborhood and they'd probably tell you that she's a youngish widow with a beautifully mannered son, and that she's a lobbyist who always seems able to attend all her son's soccer games and school plays.But almost all of that is a lie. Since the age of seventeen, Heloise has been a prostitute. When her pimp was imprisoned for murder, she changed her name and set herself up as a suburban madam. It's not only important for her work that she remain beneath everyone's radar, it's important for the life she's created for herself and her son. She's kept the boy a secret from his father, and even though she's visited the man twice a month in prison for over a decade, she's kept the boy a secret from his father.But Heloise's rigidly compartmentalized life is beginning to unravel. Her accountant is asking questions that he shouldn't. One of her former employees is causing problems. Her protector is hinting at some sort of mysterious danger she should prepare herself for. Another suburban madam in the next county is an alleged suicide... and her son's father may be released from prison. The pimp/ murderer doesn't know he has a son, and he doesn't know that Heloise is the person who betrayed him.This woman, who has no formal education, no real family, and no friends, must put an end to this life and create a brand-new one for herself and her son. Disappearing is the easy part. She's done it before, and she knows she can do it again. The difficult part will be staying alive long enough to begin the new life.I have long been a fan of Laura Lippman's standalone novels. She has the knack of focusing on a character (whom I would find almost completely unlikable) and making her fascinating. She does the same thing here in And When She Was Good. I smiled at Lippman's choice of title. My mother used to recite this little poem to me when I was a very small child: "There was a little girl who had a little curl right in the middle of her forehead. When she was good, she was very, very good. And when she was bad, she was horrid." That immediately told me that Heloise, although capable of great good, is also capable of doing damage.Superficially, the plot doesn't break new ground. A young girl with an abusive father runs away with the first male who pays her attention. Things go from bad to worse, and the young girl turns to a life of prostitution. Her pimp is a murderous control freak, but she manages to get away from him and make a comfortable life for herself and her son-- and of course her past refuses to stay in the past. Yes, the plot may very well sound familiar, but it's what Lippman does with that framework that makes the book so very good.As one thing after another begins to go wrong in Heloise's very carefully crafted life, she is taken on a voyage of self-discovery. Gradually she comes to learn that, although she's always believed she was more sinned against than sinning, the exact opposite may well be true. It's only when she confronts the truth of the life she's led and the truth of what she's done that she has a real chance of breaking free from the past. Many of us may read this book and turn our noses up at Heloise, her life, and the choices she's made. But how many of us also need to confront the truth of our own lives?
    • 3/5
      Read from September 16 to 19, 2012I liked this book, I mean, I kept reading until it was finished. But there was something about the end that just left me a little disappointed. Heloise is a strong female lead that made a bad choice when she was in high school that she's been paying for ever since. (At least that's the way I read it.) I liked that Heloise never saw herself as a victim and she was definitely a protective mother. I think my problem with the end was the way the past and the present converged. When I saw that we were in 2011, I wasn't sure if that was the present or a year ago. It threw me off. Then everything just cleaned up so nicely at the end. It was too clean, I think.Still a good read though and I nice introduction to Lippman's writing (this is my first Laura Lippman experience).
    • 4/5
      This is the story of the life of a prostitute, but it is so much more than that. Heloise is one of those suburban "madams" that you read about in the papers from time to time. Her life as been kept "compartmentalized", as she thinks of it, and most people only see one side of her life. Either they know her as the successful madam who runs her business...well, like a business... or they know her as a lobbyist widow raising a son on her own. And ne'er the twain shall meet. The one knows nothing of the other, with very few exceptions in her life.I liked the character Heloise later in life. I wasn't always the biggest fan of her in her younger years. But part of that may be because the character wasn't as fully developed in her younger years. It was more like brief flashbacks over the years, so there were always holes left in the story. After a turbulent childhood growing up poor in a small town with an abusive father and a bowed mother who has submitted to her life, the present-day portion of the story takes place when Heloise (formerly "Helen") is 37-years-old and living in suburbia.As an adult, Heloise gives every appearance of being a woman in total control of her life. I say "appearance", because even she must admit later that none of us truly have control. There are just too many things outside of our control. Heloise is trying to do things as "right" as she can, given that she works in an industry deemed "wrong".This isn't just the story of a prostitute-- it is the story of a mother's love, and what a mother will do to protect her child. Growing with a mother who put her abusive husband (well, sort of husband) before her daughter, Heloise now puts her son a priority before everything else. Everything she does is for him. While Heloise circumvents oncoming middle-age and a son entering his teens, she reassesses her life and decides it is time to restructure and reinvent. But as she is breaking free from the ties that bind, danger and ghosts linger in the shadows.My final word: I enjoyed this book. It is my first Laura Lippman, and probably won't be my last. Engaging and just suspenseful enough to wonder where she's gonna go with a thread of the storyline, and containing so many elements of a story that I've had in my head for 20 years now, I found the story ultimately interesting, and Heloise a character that I could root for.
    • 5/5
      The greatest compliment a reader can give a author is when the ability to create a fictional, main character through their words becomes 4th dimensional. As the pages are turning the protagonist intensifies not only through everyday feelings and situations but the reader can swear they felt their heartbeat as well…that is a true talent and a gift to anyone picking up a Laura Lippman novel.August 14th is the release date for Laura Lippman’s latest stand alone novel AND WHEN SHE WAS GOOD. Heloise is a successful madam/business woman operating in Maryland. She is a mother to a young son who she protects from any hint of her professional life and she has her finger on the pulse of law enforcement. The business she has nurtured and groomed from a scrupulous pimp who is now incarcerated and also the father of her son.As the novels opens we are not only introduced to Heloise but through flashbacks to Helen, a quiet, smart young lady constantly abused by her father for any simple infraction. Helen’s mom is no role model. She is Helen’s father’s mistress. He has a wife and family and only visits and stays on occasion…How Helen and Heloise become one is the real solved mystery here. This is a quiet thriller about pure instinct and survival. The complexities of life tossed into one’s life at any given time and just how much strength it takes to overcome being blindsighted.Tense, unflinching, at times extremely brutal…this is a thriller with an intense punch to the stomach. Now don’t get me wrong, this ain’t your momma’s Oprah pick!Jim MunchelCo-Manager BooksBooks A Million, Harrisburg, Pa. 17102
    • 4/5
      I received "And When She Was Good" as an advanced readers' copy. I understand sometimes authors will make changes before publication, so this review is based on the ARC.I liked the book. It was good, not great. It held my attention and would make a good summer reading choice for the beach. There isn't a whole lot of thinking that needs to go into reading the book which makes it a nice summer read.
    • 3/5
      Heloise Lewis, born Helen, is an upscale madam in suburban Maryland with a son, Scott, from her former pimp Val, serving a life sentence for murder. She begins questioning her career choice when another madam is murdered. Through flashbacks, we learn about Helen’s abusive father and passive mother, and the various men, most crucially Val, who exploited her. As usual, Lippman crafts a good plot and creates complex, believable characters, including, maybe especially, the villains. I did not enjoy it quite as much as What the Dead Know and I’d Know You Anywhere and I’m not sure why yet. I don't want to say "I didn't like the main character" but that is part of it in this case - I couldn't understand her life choices and I didn't buy her defense of "sex workers."
    • 3/5
      Although it felt that nothing happened for long stretches of this novel, when things did happen they were executed perfectly. You may think this would lead to a boring read, but And When She Was Good is far from boring.

      The main character, Helen/Heloise (Hel?) seems so sure of herself for the majority of this book, and i'd be lying if I didn't admit that the ending was the best part - but that's because Hel stopped being so superior and aloof and putting everyone down. It took her being out-smarted - seriously out-smarted - to seemingly get a grip.

      When it comes to other characters, they seem a little like an afterthought. Hel's father made my blood boil and I guess that's why she is how she is. He is a nasty and selfish man who quickly engendered feelings of hatred from me, as I am sure he was meant to. Hel's mother seemed quite timid and unsure - she was so in love, but with that monster? It didn't seem to fit that she could be that naive for her whole life.

      Overall I thought it a good enough read. It's not one of my favourites and for being a mystery there isn't much mystery at all, but it was nevertheless enjoyable and interesting.

      Drink a really expensive coffee while you read this - you know, the ones from pretentious coffee shops.

      I received a copy of this novel in exchange for an honest review.
    • 3/5
      When She was Good was a very interesting story and one that was thought provoking diving into. Not so much was this book about the act of prostitution but more so the business of running prostitution and the crappy childhood of main character Heloise aka single soccer mom, aka suburban madam.While the book was defiantly intriguing it was more a tale of a woman with a broken childhood turned prostitute, turned business woman, than the mystery I was expecting. The plot driven by a good madam verses mean pimp had a twist of suspense but mostly fell into a tad one sided dialog on the issue of legalizing prostitution or at least built up to that point in the end. Obviously main character Heloise represented a scenario where she could run a profitable business in the sex service industry, while her previous pimp was the typical power, money hungry man who exploits and hurts his girls. The book while highlighting the good and the bad failed to represent the moral magnitude of the problem itself. Im sure Lippman wanted to give her readers a good "who done it" vibe but I couldn't shake the feeling while reading that Heliose was made out to be a character whom we sympathized with and than emotionally manipulated to justify the prostitution in the story. No matter what even if prostitution were made legal with legit business owners there will always be women who are degraded, trafficked and under age girls who are and will be exploited. A madam in the end is just a pimp with lipstick and for every one that is good, you have thirty who are bad.~Thanks to TLC book tours and William Morrow for review copy.
    • 4/5
      Lippman's Heloise is a great character. She is complex and human, and even though she runs a prostitute ring, she is trying her best to do the right thing and run it in a way that protects the women who work for her. It's an engaging story, with a lovely ending. If only life would turn out so well.
    • 4/5
      Very interesting, suspenseful read about a Baltimore madam who's put a vindictive man in prison and has some other men on her trail. The central character is quite compelling.
    • 5/5
      This is the story of the trials and tribulations of a suburban madame. It starts in her youth when she is the victim of a series of abusive relationships and ends up a prostitute. She owes her life to her pimp, Val, and becomes his favorite girl. Ultimately, she takes over the business when he ends up in jail because of her doings. She must withstand all manner of financial and physical threats to keep her business afloat complicated by a young son. She is a savvy, creative and smart character and I was constantly surprised by her. ability to think her way out of jams. I really loved the book and I can see why Laura Lippman has a bevy of loyal readers. I can't recommend this book more highly.

    Book preview

    And When She Was Good - Laura Lippman

    MONDAY, OCTOBER 3

    SUBURBAN MADAM DEAD IN APPARENT SUICIDE

    The headline catches Heloise’s eye as she waits in the always-long line at the Starbucks closest to her son’s middle school. Of course, a headline is supposed to call attention to itself. That’s its job. Yet these letters are unusually huge, hectoring even, in a typeface suitable for a declaration of war or an invasion by aliens. It’s tacky, tarted up, as much of a strumpet as the woman whose death it’s trumpeting.

    SUBURBAN MADAM DEAD IN APPARENT SUICIDE

    Heloise finds it interesting that suicide must be fudged but the label of madam requires no similar restraint, only qualification. She supposes that every madam needs her modifier. Suburban Madam, D.C. Madam, Hollywood Madam, Mayflower Madam. Madam on its own would make no impression in a headline, and this is the headline of the day, repeated ad nauseam on every news break on WTOP and WBAL, even the local cut-ins on NPR. Suburban Madam dead in apparent suicide. People are speaking of it here in line at this very moment, if only because the suburb in question is the bordering county’s version of this suburb. Albeit a lesser one, the residents of Turner’s Grove agree. Schools not quite as good, green space less lush, too much lower-cost housing bringing in riffraff. You know, the people who can afford only three hundred thousand dollars for a town house. Such as the Suburban Madam, although from what Heloise has gleaned, she lived in the most middle of the middle houses, not so grand as to draw attention to herself but not on the fringes either.

    And yes, Heloise knows that because she has followed almost every news story about the Suburban Madam since her initial arrest eight months ago. She knows her name, Michelle Smith, and what she looks like in her mug shot, the only photo of her that seems to exist. Very dark hair—so dark it must be dyed—very pale eyes, otherwise so ordinary as to be any woman anywhere, the kind of stranger who looks familiar because she looks like so many people you know. Maybe Heloise is a little bit of a hypocrite, decrying the news coverage even as she eats it up, but then she’s not a disinterested party, unlike the people in this line, most of whom probably use disinterested incorrectly in conversation yet consider themselves quite bright.

    When the Suburban Madam first showed up in the news, she was defiant and cocky, bragging of a little black book that would strike fear in the hearts of powerful men throughout the state. She gave interviews. She dropped tantalizing hints about shocking revelations to come. She allowed herself to be photographed in her determinedly Pottery Barned family room. She made a point of saying how tough she was, indomitable, someone who never ran from a fight. Now, a month out from trial, she is dead, discovered in her own garage, in her Honda Pilot, which was chugging away. If the news reporters are to be believed—always a big if, in Heloise’s mind—it appears there was no black book, no list of powerful men, no big revelations in her computer despite diligent searching and scrubbing by the authorities. Lies? Bluffs? Delusions? Perhaps she was just an ordinary sex worker who thought she had a better chance at a book deal or a stint on reality television if she claimed to run something more grandiose.

    A woman’s voice breaks into Heloise’s thoughts.

    How pathetic, she says. Women like that—all one can do is pity them.

    The woman’s pronouncement is not that different from what Heloise has been thinking, yet she finds herself automatically switching sides.

    What I really hate, the woman continues, presumably to a companion, although she speaks in the kind of creamy, pleased-with-itself tone that projects to every corner of the large coffee shop, "is how these women try to co-opt feminism. Prostitution is not what feminists were striving for."

    But it is a choice, of a type. It was her choice. Free to be you and me, right? Heloise remembers a record with a pink cover. She remembers it being broken to pieces, too, cracked over her father’s knee.

    A deeper voice rumbles back, the words indistinct.

    She comes out of the gate proclaiming how tough she is, and when things get down to it, she can’t even face prosecution. Kills herself, and she’s not even looking at a particularly onerous sentence if found guilty. That’s not exactly a sign of vibrant mental health.

    Again Heloise had been close to thinking the same thing, but now she’s committed to seeing the other side. She may be mentally ill, yes, but that doesn’t prove she chose prostitution because she was mentally ill. Your logic is fallacious. She happened to get caught. What about the ones who don’t get caught? Do you think they catch everybody?

    The deep voice returns, but Heloise is on the couple’s wavelength now; she can make out his words. She said she had a black book.

    Don’t they always? I don’t believe that truly powerful men have to pay for it.

    At this point Heloise can’t contain herself. Although she always tries to be low-key and polite, especially in her own neighborhood, where she is known primarily as Scott Lewis’s mom, she turns around and says, So you don’t think governor of New York is a powerful position?

    Excuse me? The woman is taken aback. So is Heloise. She had assumed the self-possessed voice would belong to another mom, fresh from the school drop-off, but this is a middle-aged woman in business attire, talking to a man in a suit. They must be going to the office park down the street or on their way to a day of brokers’ open houses or short sales. There has been an outbreak of auctions in the community, much to everyone’s distress and worry.

    I couldn’t help overhearing. You said powerful men don’t pay for sex, yet the former governor of New York did. So are you saying that’s not a powerful job?

    I guess that’s the exception that proves the rule.

    "Actually, the saying should be the exception that tests the rule. It’s been corrupted over the years. Heloise has spent much of her adult life acquiring such trivia, putting away little stores of factoids that are contrary to what most people think they know, including the origin of factoid, which was originally used for things that seem true but have no basis in fact. There’s the accurate definition of the Immaculate Conception, for example, or the historical detail that slaves in Maryland remained in bondage after the Emancipation Proclamation because only Confederate slaves were freed by the act. The purist’s insistence that disinterested is not the same as uninterested."

    But okay, let’s say an exception does prove the rule, she continues. "Let me run through a few more exceptions for you—Senator David Vitter, Charlie Sheen, Hugh Grant. Tiger Woods, probably, although I’m less clear on whether he visited professional sex workers or women in more of a gray area. I mean, you may not think of politicians, actors, and sports stars as inherently powerful, but our culture does, no?"

    People are looking at her. Heloise does not like people to look at her unless she wants them to look at her. But she is invested in the argument and wants to win.

    Okay, so there are some powerful men who pay for sex. But they wouldn’t risk such a thing unless they were very self-destructive.

    What’s the risk? It seems to me that sexual partners whose services are bought and paid for are more reliable than mistresses or girlfriends.

    Well—

    Besides, they didn’t get her on sex, did you notice that? She was arrested on charges of mail fraud, racketeering, tax evasion. They couldn’t actually prove that she had sex for money. They almost never can. Heidi Fleiss didn’t go to jail for selling sex—she served time for not reporting her income. You know who gets busted for having sex for money? Street-level prostitutes. The ones who give hand jobs for thirty bucks. Think it through. Why is the one commodity that women can capitalize on illegal in this country? Who would be harmed if prostitution were legal?

    The woman gives Heloise a patronizing smile, as if she has the upper hand. Perhaps it’s because Heloise is in her version of full mom garb—yoga pants, a polo-neck pullover, hair in a ponytail. It is not vanity to think that she looks younger than her real age. Heloise spends a lot of money on upkeep, and even in her most casual clothes she is impeccably groomed. The woman’s companion smiles at her, too, and his grin is not at all patronizing. The woman notices. It doesn’t make her happy, although there’s nothing to suggest they are more than colleagues. But few women enjoy seeing another woman being admired.

    You seem to know a lot about the case, the woman says. Was she a friend of yours?

    Heloise understands that the point of the question is to make her disavow the dead Suburban Madam with a shocked No! and thereby prove that prostitution is disreputable. She will not fall into that trap.

    I didn’t know her, she says. "But I could have. She could have been my neighbor. She was someone’s neighbor. Someone’s daughter, someone’s sister, someone’s mother."

    She had kids? This is the man, his interest piqued, in Heloise if not in the topic, although Heloise has never met a man who isn’t fascinated by the subject of prostitution.

    No—that was just a figure of speech. But she could have been, that’s all I’m saying. She was a person. You can’t sum up her entire life in two words. You didn’t know her. You shouldn’t be gossiping about her.

    She feels a little flush of triumph. It’s fun to claim the higher moral ground, a territory seldom available to her. And Heloise really does despise gossip, so she’s not a hypocrite on that score.

    But her sense of victory is short-lived. The problem, Heloise realizes as she waits for her half-caf/half-decaf, one-Splenda latte, is that people can be reduced that way. How would Heloise be described by those who know her? Or in a headline, given that so few people really know her. Scott’s mom. The quiet neighbor who keeps to herself. Nobody’s daughter, not as far as she’s concerned. Nobody’s wife, never anyone’s wife, although local gossip figures her for a young widow because divorcées never move into Turner’s Grove. They move out, unable to afford their spouses’ equity in the house, even in these post-bubble days.

    What no one realizes is that Heloise is also just another suburban madam, fortifying herself before a typical workday, which includes a slate full of appointments for her and the six young women who work at what is known, on paper, as the Women’s Full Employment Network, a boutique lobbying firm whose mission statement identifies it as a nonprofit focused on income parity for all women. And when people hear that, they never want to know a single thing more about Heloise’s business, which is exactly as she planned it.

    1989

    You have a nothing face.

    Helen hadn’t realized that her father was even in the house. She had come home from school, fixed a snack for herself, and was heading upstairs when she heard his voice from the living-room sofa. He was lying there in the dark, the television on but muted. The remote control was broken, which meant one had to get up to change the channels or adjust the volume. So her father stayed in the dark, stuck on one channel. Helen thought of a saying used by her AP English teacher, the one about lighting a candle rather than cursing the darkness. Her father preferred to curse the darkness.

    I mean, it’s just there, you know?

    She stopped, caught off guard. She should have kept going. Why did she stop? Now she was stuck, forced to listen to him until he granted her permission to leave.

    Not ugly, but not really pretty either. Unmemorable, he continued.

    From where she stood, she could see her face in the cuckoo-clock mirror that hung at the foot of the stairs, a curious item to her, because it combined two things that shouldn’t be combined. If you glanced at a clock, you were usually running out somewhere, worried about being late. Yet the mirror invited you to stay, linger, attend to your reflection.

    Just another face in the crowd. There must be a million girls that look like you.

    Helen had brown hair and blue eyes. Her features were even, proportionate. She was of medium height, relatively slender. But her father was right. She had noticed that unless she took great pains with her looks—put on makeup, wore something showy—she seemed to fade into the background. It bugged her. And Hector Lewis was very good at knowing what bugged people about themselves. If only he could make a living from it.

    If I looked like you, I’d rob banks. No one would be able to describe you. I can’t describe you, and I’m your father. A beat. Allegedly.

    Helen knew he was challenging her to contradict him, to defend her mother’s honor. But she didn’t want to prolong the encounter. This was fairly new, his verbal abuse of her, and she wasn’t sure how to handle it despite watching him dish it out to her mother for much of her life. It had never occurred to Helen that he would start to treat her this way. She had thought she was immune, Daddy’s little girl.

    What are you gawping at?

    That was her signal that he was done with her. She climbed the stairs to her room and started her algebra homework, which required the most focus. Math did not come as easily to her as her other subjects. She charted her points, drew lines, broke down the equations, imagining the numbers as a wall that she was building around herself, a barricade that her father could not breach. She put an album on her record player, one of her mother’s old ones, Carole King. Most of her albums had been her mother’s, which wasn’t as strange as it might sound. Her mother hadn’t even been twenty when Helen was born. The music was yet another boundary, the moat outside the wall of algebra.

    But Helen knew that if her father decided to get up off the couch and follow her into her room, continue the conversation, nothing could stop him. Luckily, he seldom wanted to get up off the couch these days.

    Helen had been baffled when her father started in on her the week before last. If he saw her eating dessert, he warned her about getting fat. You’re not the kind of girl who can get away with an extra pound. You take after your mother that way. If she was reading, he pronounced her a bookworm, a bore. If she tried to watch a television show, he told her she’d better bring home a good report card, yet she had been close to a straight-A student for most of her life.

    She asked her mother why her father was irritable, but she shrugged, long used to her own up-and-down dynamic with him.

    Then Helen finally got it. Her father was putting her on notice because she had seen him at McDonald’s with Barbara Lewis, even though Helen hadn’t given it a second thought at the time. In a town of fewer than twenty-five thousand people, everyone ends up at the McDonald’s at some point. They had been in the drive-through lane. Why not? she told herself as she locked up her bike, skirting his eye line as she walked inside. She went to McDonald’s with all sorts of people, didn’t mean anything. Money went a long way at McDonald’s. You could get a large shake and fries for what some places charged for a shake alone. Her father wouldn’t want to go someplace expensive with Barbara, because she was always trying to shake him down for money. He wasn’t treating Barbara, he was showing her how little he cared for her.

    In Barbara’s defense, she did have four kids with Hector Lewis. So even though she had a decent job and he had none, he probably should be helping her out, at least a little.

    Hector had left Barbara fifteen years ago, after impregnating nineteen-year-old Beth Harbison. Helen was born seven months later. Meghan, Barbara and Hector’s youngest, was born four months after Helen, and Helen had no trouble doing that math. That was the last time he was ever with her, Helen’s mother often said, as if it were something of which to be proud, that he went back to have sex with Barbara only once. And she still won’t give him a divorce. So why should he pay her any support? A woman can’t have it both ways.

    But someone was having it both ways, Helen realized that day outside McDonald’s. There might not have been another baby after Meghan, but there had been sex. They had probably had sex that very afternoon. Perhaps it was Hector who kept persuading Barbara not to divorce him. That way he never had to marry Beth, whom he blamed for keeping him in his own hometown, an indistinct place just north of the Mason-Dixon Line, not quite a town yet too distant from anywhere else to be a suburb. Like a wart on somebody’s asshole, her father said.

    Helen had not told her mother about seeing her father at McDonald’s with Barbara. She wondered if he knew that. If Helen had a secret and another person found out about it, she would be extremely nice to that person. But Hector Lewis didn’t behave like most people did. He just loves us so much, her mother was always telling Helen. He loved them so much that he left his other family when Beth became pregnant. He loved them so much that he refused to work more than a few hours a week, and then only jobs where he was paid cash money, which he spent on himself. He loved Beth so much that he made fun of her and, on the occasional Saturday night, beat the crap out of her. He gets frustrated he can’t do better by us, but if he got a good job, on the books, Barbara would take everything. He just loves us so much.

    Please, Helen prayed, make him love us a little less.

    Shoot. She had left her history book in the kitchen. She couldn’t do her homework without it, but she couldn’t get it without walking through the living room again. She imagined she was invisible, hoping that would make it so. Sometimes if you acted as if something were true, it became true.

    But you better not do anything bad, her father called out as she walked by. She was confused for a moment. She was in the middle of her homework. What could she be doing that was bad? Then she realized he was still having the one-sided conversation he had started an hour ago, about her nothing face. Having suggested that she had the perfect look for a criminal, he was now outraged that she might become one, which she had no intention of doing. Helen wanted to be a nurse. Actually, she wanted to be a history professor, but she understood that wouldn’t be allowed, that it would take too much time in school with no guarantee of a job. A nurse could always find work. Her mother was an RN, and her pay supported the household.

    I won’t, Helen promised, hoping it was the right thing to say.

    You better not, he said, his voice rising as if she had disagreed with him. She wondered if she should try to get out of the house until her mother came home. It was five o’clock on a winter Thursday, too dark and cold to pretend a sudden errand on her bike.

    I said I wouldn’t. Despite her best efforts, a note of exasperation crept into her voice.

    Are you getting smart with me?

    No, sir. Her voice was very tiny now, a mouse squeak.

    "I said, Are you getting smart with me?"

    She tried to speak so he could hear her. No, sir.

    ARE YOU GETTING SMART WITH ME?

    N-n-n-—she could not get the words out. This was new, at least with her. But this is how the fights with her mother began. Her father kept hearing disagreement where there was only appeasement. N-n-n-n-

    He threw his beer can at her head. His aim was impressive; the can struck her temple. Empty, or close to, it didn’t hurt, but she flinched, then continued to the kitchen, trying to remember why she had started to go there in the first place.

    The house was small, but it was still shocking how fast he came up from the sofa and into the kitchen behind her, grabbing her shirt at the collar and whirling her around to face him.

    I—will—have—respect—in—my—house. Each word was accompanied by a slap. The slaps were surprisingly dainty and precise, as if he were beating out a staccato rhythm on some improvised piece of percussion. Helen had had a drum set when she was a baby. She knew because she had seen the photos of herself playing with it, but she didn’t remember it. She looked so happy in those photos. Did all babies—

    Now he was banging her head on the kitchen table. Again he seemed to have absolute control. It was so slow, so measured. He was still speaking, but it was hard to focus on the words. Something was bleeding. Her nose, she thought. She heard another voice, from very far away. Oh, Hector, oh, Hector. Her mother was standing in the doorway that led from the carport, a bag of groceries in her arms.

    Her father acted as if he were coming out of a trance, as if he had no idea how he came to be holding his daughter by the scruff of her neck.

    She was very disrespectful, he said.

    Oh, Hector. Her mother put the groceries on the kitchen drainboard, dampened a paper towel, and applied it to Helen’s gushing nose.

    I think I might have a concussion, Helen whispered.

    Shhh, her mother said. Don’t upset him.

    And that was the day that her father went upstairs and broke every single album she had, cracking them across his knee as if they were very bad children who needed to be spanked. That was okay. Albums weren’t cool. Not that she could afford CDs or a player, but she could live without the albums. She liked to listen to WFEN, a station that broadcast from Chicago, available on her little portable radio late at night. It wasn’t a particularly good station—it played soupy ballads, things that were old-fashioned even by her mother’s standards—but she liked the idea that her radio could pick up something from Illinois, even if it meant a night listening to Mel Tormé and Peggy Lee.

    That’s old people’s music, her father said, standing in the door.

    She started, but he was already gone. Maybe he had never been there at all.

    That weekend her father went out and bought her a Sony Walkman and ten tapes from Lonnie’s Record & Tape Traders. Indigo Girls and Goo Goo Dolls and De La Soul, Dream Theater, and Depeche Mode. She couldn’t begin to figure his selection criteria. He also bought her a heart-shaped locket from Zales. Her mother exclaimed at how pretty it was. She wasn’t envious that it was Helen who had gotten all these gifts. She seemed happy for her. Helen understood. Every beating she got was one her mother didn’t get. Hector’s beatings were a finite commodity. A man had only so much time in the day.

    A few weeks later, when her mother fastened the locket around Helen’s neck as she prepared to go to a school dance—with a group of girls, because she was not allowed to date until she was sixteen—Helen said, I saw Daddy at McDonald’s. A week or so before.

    Before was understood. Her mother didn’t say anything, just smoothed Helen’s thick dark hair, which she was wearing in a ponytail very high on her head, so it cascaded like a plume. With eye makeup and a new dress, she wasn’t a nothing-face tonight.

    He was with Barbara, Helen said. Barbara Lewis. She picked up the purse that her mother had lent her for the evening, a beaded bag, one of the few nice things her mother still owned, and sailed out the door.

    TUESDAY, OCTOBER 4

    Heloise stops at one of her favorite sushi places on her way out of Annapolis. Tsunami, an unfortunate name in 2011. What can the owners do? Heloise is sympathetic to the challenges inherent in rebranding. When she had to change her name, she felt the need to stay connected to her original name, and not just for business reasons.

    Why? Chopsticks poised over her sashimi, she can no longer remember why it was important to her to keep the first syllable of what some might call her Christian name while holding on to the surname of the man she despised more than any other.

    Is her father the one she despises the most? The competition, after all, is notable. She considers the top candidates. Billy. Val. No, her father’s still the champion asshole of the world, because he was supposed to love her and he didn’t. The other men didn’t owe her anything, except perhaps the money and time stolen from her. Besides, if her father had been a different person, perhaps she wouldn’t have ended up with a Billy, much less a Val.

    Usually Heloise has no use for the blanket blame applied to parents. This was true even before she became one. Earlier this year she was entranced, almost in spite of herself, in a murder trial featuring a seeming monster of a mother who eventually was acquitted of killing her daughter. The woman’s behavior did seem inexplicable—if she didn’t kill the child, she did something. Yet the hate for the woman is so virulent that Heloise can’t help trying to find a way to empathize with her.

    Heloise and Paul Marriotti, one of her oldest and favorite clients, had ended up talking about the case in the lazy half hour they allowed themselves after business was done. Heloise didn’t linger with many men—most didn’t want their paid companions to linger—but Paul enjoyed her company and often bounced ideas off her, paying for the extra time if he went on too long.

    This Florida murder case, he’d said to her. It’s the kind of thing that makes people want to write legislation just to showboat. I’m dreading the kind of stuff that’s going to come through committee next year. As if we need to make it illegal for women to kill their children.

    Only women? Heloise’s challenge was smiling, good-natured.

    Oh, the bills will be gender-neutral, but this is the case that will be in the back of everyone’s minds. The bills will be framed as better oversight of abusive, neglectful parents, but everyone will know the subtext—the next bitch must not get off.

    You mean the next white bitch. With pretty little big-eyed white kids whose photographs make them suitable poster children. I don’t recall the same national outcry when they discovered that child in Baltimore who had been starved and so deprived of basic care that his development was essentially stunted for life.

    Heloise, if you want clients with bleeding-heart-liberal politics like yours, you’re never going to make a dime. Social workers and public defenders can’t afford you.

    I’m a socially progressive libertarian, she said.

    He gave her an affectionate smack on her now-clothed hip. Yes, they had an easy, playful rhythm much like—what? Not a marriage because there were never recriminations or resentments. Not a friendship, although they were friendly. They were collegial colleagues, two people who had worked together for a very long time, with positive benefits for both. She could disappear tomorrow and Paul wouldn’t miss her that much.

    Yet it surprised her when Paul said, Next week—do you have anyone new?

    New?

    New to me. I need a little novelty.

    Of course, she said, conscious not to allow any emotion to show on her face. Would the cashier at the diner care if the man who always bought a York Peppermint Pattie at the end of his meal decided that he wanted a roll of LifeSavers instead? Not if she owned the diner and made a profit either way. Besides, it wasn’t the first time that Paul had branched out. One couldn’t call it straying, right?

    I’ll send you January.

    January? Get out.

    We have a new theme right now. January, April, May, June, July. You wouldn’t like November, though. She’s very frosty.

    The joke, groaner that it was, allowed her to establish equilibrium. Paul wanted to try someone new. That was fine. It wasn’t a comment on her. She would bet anything that he would switch back to her after a time or two or three with January. Which was no knock on January, whom Paul really would enjoy. He liked a little ice, a coolness, a reserve. Heloise would never send him June, busty and ripe, a volcanic Italian girl in the mold of the 1950s knockouts Loren and Lollobrigida. Besides, whichever girl she sent, he would return to her. He always did. As much as Paul needs novelty now and then, he likes talking about his work even more. And as smart as Heloise’s girls are, they can’t sustain long conversations about the inner workings of a statehouse committee, which is

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