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    The Haunted Forest Tour
    The Haunted Forest Tour
    The Haunted Forest Tour
    Audiobook8 hours

    The Haunted Forest Tour

    Written by Jeff Strand and James A. Moore

    Narrated by Joe Hempel

    4/5

    ()

    About this audiobook

    Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Haunted Forest Tour! Sit back and enjoy a smooth ride in air-conditioned comfort as your heavily armored tram takes you through nature's most astonishing creation. The forest is packed to capacity with dangerous and terrifying creatures of all shapes, sizes, and hunger levels, and you'll get to observe these wonders in complete safety.

    Howl with a werewolf! Gaze into the glowing eyes of a giant spider! Look right through a spooky ghost! See horrific monsters you couldn't even imagine, only inches away from you! Things with fangs, things with claws, things with dripping red jaws-you'll see them all!

    Not thrilling enough? Well, it's Halloween, and so we're offering a very special tour through the Haunted Forest. The new route goes deeper into the woods than any civilians have ventured before, and you're guaranteed to get a good scare! Rest assured that every possible security precaution has been taken. The Haunted Forest Tour has a 100% safety record, and technical difficulties are unheard of. You will be in no danger whatsoever.

    We promise.
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherTantor Media, Inc
    Release dateAug 31, 2018
    ISBN9781977377272
    The Haunted Forest Tour
    Author

    Jeff Strand

    JEFF STRAND is the Bram Stoker Award-winning author of lots and lots of books. Some are scary, some are funny, and most are both. He bets his cat is bigger than your cat.

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    Reviews for The Haunted Forest Tour

    4/5

    237 ratings24 reviews

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    • 4/5
      If you really enjoy forest monster horror and that scene in A Cabin In The Woods when all the elevators open up (you know what I’m talking about), you will dig this. It’s a really fun, really gory ride that should absolute be a movie, except that the budget would probably have to be 300 mil at least in order to properly pull off all the baddies...

      2 people found this helpful

    • 4/5
      Jurrasic Park without dinosaurs but with plenty of monsters and shady businessmen. There was a lot of action and dark humor but honestly, the narrator left something to be desired. A bit of inflection my guy!

      1 person found this helpful

    • 3/5
      Goosebumps meets Cabin in the Woods meets Supernatural. A good monster story but a little cheesy. But sometimes thays a good thing!

      1 person found this helpful

    • 3/5
      I enjoyed the story but the volume cuts down at the 15 minute mark

      1 person found this helpful

    • 5/5
      So friggin awesome! The story is excellently gory, with lots af creatures (monsters) the book has a wonderful rhythm and speed. Was a bit sad when it ended. Recommend this highly.

      1 person found this helpful

    • 2/5
      Not what I expected. I was glad that I was done reading... pfff
    • 4/5
      A fun listen! It did read like
      Jurassic Park with monsters.
    • 3/5
      This is a good listen for a while, but whilst the characters and overall story are really worth listening to (and terrifying), the narrator ruins the experience by sounding like he is half asleep! I got so far through the story before giving up as I couldn't stand his tone any more, and when something nasty happens the tension isn't there. To sum up, great story, very poor narrator
    • 5/5
      Super fun book. Can’t wait to read more from these authors!
    • 5/5
      So stinking good! I picked this book up solely based on the premise of a haunted tour gone wrong, and it’s easily one of my best decisions. The characters feel real and their reactions to the situations they find themselves in feel perfectly reasonable. I also loved the different perspectives of all the different characters. Would definitely recommend this book to anyone who enjoys stories like Fantasticland or Jurassic Park.
    • 5/5
      Wow this book was soooooooo F goood !!!
      Loved every moment ! Real good
    • 4/5
      I thought there would be a wacked out tiger, but nnooo!
    • 3/5
      The story itself was ok the narration could have been better suited for a college math book so it made the audio version difficult to get through
    • 5/5
      Best horror story I have read lately. Immediate action and great character development. Packed with horror and unpredictable twists. The narrator does a terrific job adding to the quality of the storyline. I couldnt stop listening...great job to all in volved.
    • 5/5
      Fast paced and fun! Very entertaining would recommend for an easy read/listen.
    • 5/5
      Freaking loved it! Gory, funny, suspenseful, and action packed! Definite recommend!
    • 1/5
      The author wants to be the Stephen King of Jurassic Park, but he doesn't have the skills to hack it.

      If you're going to write about a forest of insanely wild monsters, you should be ready to actually describe them beyond "nothing they'd ever seen before."

      And for the record, "fast paced" isn't supposed to mean, "doesn't bother to set up any kind of actual backstory, lore or explanation for what is going on."

      The answer to every question about this spooky forest and the things that live in it is just "no one knows! isn't that spo0o0o0ky??"

      2 people found this helpful

    • 1/5
      Well the only black guy wasn’t killed off first so I guess that was a good thing. However the Author did make him out to be a real jerk. Another book for white heros only.

      1 person found this helpful

    • 4/5
      Fast moving gore packed romp through a haunted forest.
    • 4/5
      I was well pleased with this novel. Everything about it was fun: the story, the humor, the deaths. It had the perfect combination of horror, comedy, and seriousness.The story takes place in a small, normal town in New Mexico. Normal until a full grown forest pops up and takes over the entire town in one day. A forest that is populated with monsters and ghosts and too many creatures to describe. Flash forward a few years and the forest has been converted into a tourist attraction with tram rides through the center of the forest. A special Halloween tour is about to take place and this ride is going to be more disastrous than anybody realizes.The mix of characters was very easy to picture in my head. And the vocal performance by Joe Hempel really helped to differentiate each one. The story had a wide selection of characters so it was not obvious as to who would be killed and who wouldn't. And there were than a few times where I was actively laughing out loud. One more thing that I don't know if Strand and Moore were doing this on purpose or not, but it seemed to me that they kept stopping chapters semi-abruptly, leaving a character in a near impossible spot. In my mind, I pictured it as either Strand or Moore saying "Ha, let's see how you write your way out of this one." as they pass the story to the other. I'm not sure if that was real or not but it felt like it. To me, it made the experience even better.
    • 5/5
      While searching for a good scary book to read for the Pages and Pause Screen Halloween episode, I stumbled across The Haunted Forest Tour by James A Moore and Jeff Strand. The synopsis did grab a chuckle out of me and I thought okay, clever. Maybe if the book could be half as clever, it’ll be enjoyable. Boy, was it more than just half as clever! It was surprisingly fantastic!

      Haunted Forest Tour is a constant thrill. Every time a question is raised, it gets answered within the next ten-ish minutes. A character pops up that is just horrible? Guess what? He’s dead! Everything is just constantly flowing and and moving. Which is surprising considering this book has two authors. I’ve found that most books with co-authors can become clunky and the handoff from one author to another is blatantly obvious. This is definitely not the case in Haunted Forest Tour. It is fluid and seamless.

      Then, there’s the perfect balance between horror and comedy. You’ll get one scene where you are completely terrified, but it will be followed up by something so foolish, you can’t help but laugh, and then we can go back to gore (which is light, in my opinion, esp when compared to something like Little Heaven by Nick Cutter). It’s all just so wonderfully crafted, a truly fantastic horror story. What makes it even better is that the questions are all answered. You don’t really need them answered, you accept it at face value. Yeah sure, New Mexico seems weird enough to have a random forest full of monsters pop up. Why not?

      If you are looking for just a fun, but scary book to read, I DEFINITELY recommend The Haunted Forest Tour by James A Moore and Jeff Strand. It’s just super great and really makes me want to pick up more stuff by both authors.
    • 4/5
      A fast paced gory thrill ride through a forest filled with mind blowing monsters that came up from the bowels of hell. Horror fans, do not miss this one!
    • 4/5
      Take a cryptozoological romp through the Haunted Forest with Jeff Stand and James F. Moore. These authors collaborated on this book a number of years ago and recently resurrected it for their fans. After you read it you'll be glad they did.The plot jumps out immediately as huge trees suddenly begin sprouting up all over a town causing tremendous amounts of deaths and destruction. No one can say why this happened, but an enterprising company soon takes the area over and advertises it as the Haunted Forest Tour. You see, not only trees sprouted up years ago but also all kinds of creatures. Some of these are mythological in nature, others defy definition. It's these creatures that become the selling point for the tour.A huge Halloween tour is planned to showcase the area with a limited guest list. As Strand and Moore throw together a number of disparate characters (that we get to know well) together, the fun starts to begin. See, the tour is advertised as 100% safe with no chance that any of the creatures can get at the guests as they tram through the forest. (Yeah, heard that one before...) Well, you can probably guess what happens pretty quickly. The bulk of the book follows a number of characters as they attempt to battle their way out of the forest and back to safety. Strand and Moore let their imaginations run wild as they expose the characters (and readers) to dozens of different creatures.While, not for the squeamish, the plot never lets up and concludes with a satisfying finish.
    • 5/5
      The Haunted Forest Tour by Jeff Strand and James A. Moore is a great horror book. I felt like I was watching an old time horror movie. It was part funny and part horror but I couldn't quit reading it. The crazy things that lead up to the forest and then up to the people in the forest is crazy and weird but fascinating! The last 1/4 of the book lost some stream but it was still good. I enjoyed it tremendously, even if I felt like I was watching a B movie, I loved that! It was a hoot. Gore, mayhem, creatures, terror, and strangeness, YES!!! LOL